Aximili's Headache

And here you are hurried,

And here you are gone,

And here is the love

That it's all built upon.

From Leonard Cohen's "Here It Is"

Why, exactly, did we stop? Aximili asked, turning to the gorilla.

Marco glared around, his small black eyes narrowed suspiciously. Something's not quite right here…

Technically, you are not quite right. There is not a single Hork-Bajir in sight.

Which means that something is wrong.

Aximili let his stalks scan the scene, while wondering; Why did you claim to have guessed accurately, when you were wrong?

Old habit.

Ah.

Don't think I can't hear you! called a third voice, and both Marco and Aximili flinched, increasing their efforts in glancing around. Open your thought-speech to the rest of us, continued the voice; it was only Tobias. I know you're there. And it's obvious that you're talking.

You are all here? wondered Aximili.

It seems so, Tobias replied.

You heard us? questioned Marco, some note of crankiness in his voice.

There was a disdainful huff. I'm hungry; my sense of hearing is at its official peak. I was listening for dinner, though, not a clumsy gorilla and Andalite hooves clopping about on concrete… speaking of dinner, since you don't seem to be doing anything important, would one of you make yourself useful and morph mouse?

No thank you, declined Marco cheerfully. Where are you?

I was just coming to that. Continue towards the pool. From there we're obvious.

Aximili trotted forwards along the short corridor, keeping his tail raised and his stalks scanning for possible enemies. The lack of them – the strange silence that let the sounds of his hooves echo all too loudly – was making him nervous.

Why is this place empty? he asked Issetha.

I don't know, whispered the Yeerk lowly. I guess… I guess it's on Esplin's orders. He probably doesn't trust anyone to wait in here with the prisoners until he returns. What if that person turned out to be a traitor? Like… like me? she finished weakly.

Aximili wished he could have thought something to comfort her, but found nothing to think. All the same, he felt Issetha's grateful, gentle touch on his mind; It's the thought that counts, Aximili, she murmured. Thank you. And then, more glumly; I should have known.

Aximili's attention returned to the outside world to realise that Issetha had taken over his stalks, and was turning them in wide circles. He was standing by the pool; the path he had come from was on the centre of a wide, half-circle shaped wall, filled with force field cages. His eyes first focused on Tobias, glaring fiercely back at him from inside a cage. Each cage was a force field in the shape of another half-circle, locking whatever was inside into a space barely large enough for a not-too-tall human to stand, although not to stretch an arm out straight in any direction – or even an elbow. Tobias, in his hawk body, had more than enough room to stand on the floor, but he was not looking happy. Next time, he said angrily, I don't care if they find out I'm a hawk. I'm ordering a proper perch. I hate sitting on the floor.

"Be quiet, Tobias," muttered Rachel from the neighbouring cage, about five meters off. Despite her words, her tone was more concerned than annoyed. "At least you can still morph."

Lot of good it does me, too, complained the hawk. And then something almost apologetic appeared in his fierce gaze, for just a moment. Sorry.

There was a shielding wall, reaching in towards the centre and the pool, between each of the cages, so they could not see each other. Rachel was sitting – proving that it actually was possible to sit – squeezed down uncomfortably between the cold metal wall behind her and the unyielding force field in front. Since her hands were behind her, it seemed doubly unpleasant.

Marco joined Aximili, near the pool – although not too near; they both unconsciously kept a safe distance between themselves and the ominous infestation pier.

What's this thing I hear about not being able to morph? asked the gorilla.

"Cuffs," Cassie explained, who was in one more cage off to the side of Rachel. Also her hands were behind her back, but she was standing. She had been leaning against the wall behind her, but had straightened when Marco and Aximili had come into sight. She twisted slightly to display hands locked together by a single blank stretch of metal, wrapped tightly around her wrists. "They don't seem to like morphing energy."

"Even Cassie can't morph," Rachel growled, and Cassie's face flickered towards the floor in something almost like shame.

In the furthest cage, far from the rest of them, stood Jake, hunched forwards awkwardly due to how tall he was.

"Are you planning to let us out?" he asked bluntly. Their situation, as well as the limited space he was trapped in, did not seem to have helped Jake's mood.

Marco grinned at him. Just like that, huh? Not even a "hello, glad to see you, how's everything going?"

"Marco?" Jake said with fake patience.

Yes, oh Fearless Leader?

"I don't know what you've been told, but this is not a vacation resort. That means two things; one, I want us all out of here as quickly as possible. Two, we don't have all day. Conclusion; could you take a look around and see if you can find a control room or something? Something with a switch to take down these force fields?"

Sure, Jake, Marco agreed and lumbered off towards a large, heavy door.

"Not that one," warned Rachel. "That one is probably locked, and it leads to the main chamber of the Yeerk Pool."

Marco hurriedly turned and lumbered off in another direction, towards the other door; there were only two, not counting the one he and Aximili had come from.

I'd be surprised if he finds anything, the voice of his Yeerk murmured in the back of Aximili's head. It would have been too easy.

Then how, Issetha, do we get them out? the Andalite wondered privately.

I don't know, sighed Issetha heavily. Esplin might not be known for discretion, but he hasn't exactly been blurting out security details about this, either. There must be a control station somewhere, even if it's not there, for it's not controlled from the Yeerk Pool Complex… and that's about all I know.

Very helpful.

Don't blame me for it. It's not my fault.

Sorry.

I think I know how to get the cuffs off, though. You simply spin the middle part; it releases a lock which lets them open.

"By the way, Ax, how did you get in?" Rachel asked suddenly, distracting Aximili from his conversation with the Yeerk. "You didn't come through the door. And the only thing the Yeerks told us about this place was that the door was the only way in or out, and we should keep an eye on it for as soon as it opens and Visser One shows his ugly face, we'll all be more properly introduced to the infestation pier."

There is a secret entrance, Aximili informed her shortly.

"And what is this place?" Cassie questioned lowly.

Animorph Infestation Facility, announced Marco, lumbering back towards them – very quickly. Makes you feel special, huh?

"Animorph Infestation Facility?! They wish! As soon as I get out of this cage, I'm ripping it apart!" declared Rachel vehemently, kicking at the force field with her foot. She ended up banging her knee, but refused to even grimace, and instead glowered around her, searching for something to direct her anger at.

Oh, about that, Marco drawled. We might have a problem. I found a switch.

"Then why are these force field cages still here?" demanded Jake.

It was a power switch.

"My question remains," Jake said dryly.

Well, I thought it was a power switch, Marco explained defensively. It had one of those warning signs next to it. I should have known it was too good to be true.

Get to the point, suggested Tobias. Was it a switch or not?

Oh, it was a switch all right. Right there, in that room. He pointed at the room he had briefly visited. Problem is, now there's a switch and a surprise: a ticking bomb.

He was met by silence, and rolled his eyes. You know, one of those things that tend to go boom, and –

"We know what a bomb is," snarled Rachel, frustrated.

Jake had looked up sharply. "Ax? Disarm it!"

Aximili had already spun around on a back hoof and was galloping towards the room, the switch, and the bomb.

No use – it's protected by a force field, Marco told them. We've got about ten minutes. And there're no more switches to try.

Rachel closed her eyes, threw her head back, and let out a dry, mirthless laugh, coming from some mix of irony and recklessness. The sound sent a chill down Aximili's tail as he stopped and turned back towards the others.

Nice going, Marco, muttered Tobias darkly.

Marco shook his head. You can strangle me later. First we need to get you out of those cages.

"Why would there be a switch with a bomb down here?" Cassie wondered.

"So they know that even if we get out of the cages we'd be toast, since we'd go for the only switch in the place, hoping it opens the door out of here," Rachel growled. "Or, more properly, Marco would go for the switch. They know us too well."

But Cassie shook her head. "Then why set it for a time? Why not let it go off directly, making sure we don't have time to escape? No, that it's set for a time means someone is supposed to have time to escape."

Sorry to burst your bubble, Cassie, but I don't think we're meant to be those someones, Tobias said.

"No," Cassie said. "They are. The Yeerks – in the pool."

"And that helps us how?" Rachel wondered sharply.

That means there is a control panel in the pool, Issetha breathed with Aximili's voice. Of course! I remember a few weeks ago, when Othil and Dirmek-734 were discussing –

She silenced, seeing how the caged Animorphs were staring at her and her host.

"What was that about?" Rachel asked finally.

Issetha, explained Aximili, tensing to see their reactions. Tobias's face was unreadable, Rachel's turned stony, and Cassie simply nodded once, grim but pleased.

And Aximili's Prince…

"YOU LET THE YEERK COME?!" he roared, both casting angry looks at Marco and alarmed ones at Aximili.

Yes, Aximili admitted stiffly. I did.

"WHAT WERE YOU –"

"Jake," Cassie said in an ordering voice from her cage. "Calm down."

"Calm down?!" Jake repeated, turning to the sound of Cassie's voice. "We've got only two people out of these cages and able to help us. Two, and one of them is infested!"

"She's a resistance Yeerk," Cassie reminded him.

"She's a Yeerk," Jake countered. His face was twisted into a mask of both anger and… and fear. "And we don't know if we can trust her. Ax, get that thing out of your head right now."

Aximili stared at his Prince, not moving. Jake, who was shaking where he stood, still locked into the force field cage's limited space, glared back. Slowly, ever so slowly, it dawned on him that the Andalite was not going to obey. His face went as grey as ashes.

They still didn't have much faith in Issetha, Aximili thought. Still. And that meant they didn't have any faith in him. Anger fumed inside him. Issetha had done nothing to earn their distrust! Nothing!

"Be reasonable," Cassie snapped at Jake, and she seemed of the same opinion as Aximili. "She could have betrayed us at almost any time, but didn't, so why would she do it now? I told him to bring her! I told him to ask her for help! If you're going to be mad, Jake, then be mad at me – one more thing to blame me for."

Tears had appeared in Cassie's eyes. Jake could not see them, but still he grimaced, glaring intently at the floor, and did not answer. He did not comment Issetha any further.

She did help us get here, Marco muttered, glancing at Aximili. And I suppose she can help you out of those cages. Because there're only three doors here, and not one of them leads to a control room.

There isn't one, Issetha informed them all with Aximili's voice. As I said… it's all controlled from the pool. Has to be.

You mean from the Yeerk Pool Complex? Tobias guessed.

Issetha shook her host's head. No. From inside the pool, to be of use to the Yeerks there. From that pool. She let one of her host's hands point towards the pool and the single but complicatedly structured infestation pier at the edge of the area.

All gazes turned to the pool. Cassie visibly shuddered, letting out a slight sob. Jake heard her, worry replacing the fear in his eyes, and he shook himself as if to get rid of a bad feeling. When he spoke his voice had a business-like tone to it. "Well, then there's only one thing to do, so get on with it."

Marco shook his head. Oh, no. I'm not going anywhere near that. Besides, I don't have a Yeerk morph.

"I do," Cassie whispered. She touched the force field in front of her tentatively – with her shoulder, since her hands were secured behind her. "But I'm afraid that won't do much good."

Jake looked grimly up at Marco. "If we run out of time, and we can't get out of these cages, you'll have to leave without us."

Marco's gorilla face was expressionless as he nodded agreement, which seemed to calm Jake at least a bit. "You, too, Ax," the Animorph leader continued, turning to the Andalite.

Aximili had been ready to either agree or refuse – he hadn't made up his mind yet –when felt the stirring of the Yeerk in his mind and had a sudden idea. I can morph Issetha, he said to the group, and privately added; If… if I am allowed to acquire you, that is.

But Issetha objected, and used his voice to say; Even if you have time, one of you can't just morph Yeerk and swim down – it's not that simple. You might be trapped down there… the pool is evacuating all the Yeerks. Look at it! The water is swirling down a drain… slowly, but it'll be almost impossible for anyone to swim there… especially someone who's never been a Yeerk before. If you dive into that pool now there's a good chance you'll be swept off to an emergency pool far deeper into the ground. You'd be trapped for days, no chance of demorphing, no chance of escaping.

"Then it's practically a choice between one of us down, or four of us down," Marco said grimly. He was demorphing, in order to remorph for a quick exit later. The gorilla was many things; but fast was not one of them.

Of the others, Jake thought of the solution first. His eyes narrowed at Aximili. "Then we have the simplest solution left. Tell your… your Yeerk to –"

But what if she betrays us? Aximili asked, mocking their earlier distrust of the Yeerk. He saw the last option as clearly as anyone, and for some reason – that at the moment was just beyond his reach – it made him testy. Also, wasn't this a bit too perfect? Be out of the cages and get rid of Issetha, both at once. It was almost as if someone had planned it; Aximili was not amused.

Jake shook his head. "I don't think –"

Now she is of use to you, Aximili snarled, interrupting his Prince. Now you are on her side. Now you trust her, because you have no choice.

Jake was surprised by this vehement reaction. "Ax –"

But the Andalite shook his head, dancing a step back, still glaring at his Prince. No. I will not ask her to follow your orders, or expect her to help you. That's her decision. You talk to her yourself. You ask her yourself, if she's willing to listen, if she's willing to help after how you all have treated her.

There was a silence as Aximili met the steady gaze of his Prince, on the other side of the force field. Issetha tried to speak privately to the Andalite, saying something about 'overdone temper', but was ignored. Warning bells rang in the back of Aximili's head; his Prince was in trouble, in need of help, he should be doing all in his power to… but no. Not now.

Issetha had done enough; she had helped them this far. She had betrayed her own people, the Yeerks, in even taking their side – no, his side… she was on his side. She had recently lost her brother; she had done enough.

Ax-man? Tobias said in private thought-speech. Why are you being so defensive about her?

Aximili refused to acknowledge that, not even sending Tobias a glance. As so many times before, but now from a completely different perspective, he waited for his Prince to act.

Jake shuddered, turning his eyes towards the floor before they looked up at the Andalite again. "Issetha?" he said finally.

Yes? the Yeerk said, softening Aximili's voice from his own furious tone and easing the trembling caused by his anger.

"I need your help. I'm asking for your help."

I know, Issetha said.

"I'm asking…" he kept his eyes on Aximili while he spoke, to see the Andalite's reaction, but Aximili's mood was hidden behind Issetha's calmer mask. "I'm asking you to go into that pool and take down the force fields – if you think that's possible."

It's possible, Issetha assured him.

"Ehm…" Marco interrupted. "We're on a deadline, here. The bomb, remember?"

"Oh, right," Rachel smiled, all too sweetly. "Marco's little stroke of genius."

"Quiet, Rachel," snapped Jake impatiently, and Rachel first blinked in surprise and then her face turned dark. Aximili saw clearly how she took a deep breath and struggled to bite back a sharp reply. Somehow, she succeeded.

"Do you think you could deactivate the bomb from inside the pool?" Jake asked Aximili's Yeerk.

No. But it's obviously possible to evacuate the pool, so it should be possible to deactivate the force fields. And if it isn't, then…

"Then we've all got front row tickets to a really big boom," said Marco cheerfully, his voice shrill.

Precisely, confirmed Issetha. Privately, to her host, she added; And I suppose this is goodbye, then.

Goodbye? Aximili repeated sharply. And then… that reason that had been just out of reach was suddenly vividly clear. Issetha, no, he growled.

Do you have a better idea, Aximili? she countered. If someone does not shut down the force fields – soon – your friends will all die. Your Prince. Your shorm. Cassie, and Rachel.

They will not! Marco and I would never let that happen. We shall –

You'll find a way? I found one for you.

But if you go into that pool, I… I shall never see you again. I'll… His voice failed him and faded away.

Issetha was silent, but took gentle control of Aximili's body and moved it towards the pool.

This time, he fought her; he fought her for every step, grasping desperately for control over limbs that remained beyond his reach, screaming, cursing her, cursing what she was and what she could do, cursing the world in general. By the time they reached the end of the pier Issetha was almost exhausted, and her grip on her host was failing, strained to its limits. She was not used to so much resistance.

Aximili stared down at the sludgy waters, Issetha looking through his eyes.

The Yeerk made her Andalite host kneel on the end of the pier, at some distance from the menacing restraints that could have been used on someone on who was to be infested. She made him lean forwards and turn his head to the side. A stalk noted Marco and the others watching intently.

Issetha's host had stopped fighting her, and stopped screaming. He was unnaturally quiet, his mind withdrawn. That was why he almost frightened her when he spoke. Issetha…

Yes?

There… there must be some other way.

I thought you wanted nothing more than to be rid of me, Issetha joked joylessly, feeling the mood of the mind linked to her own – a mind usually bursting with activity, but which now was still.

Why would I want that? You've become a… he hesitated, battling himself and his own thoughts before continuing; An ally. A collaborator. A… a friend. And… and…

I'll miss you, too, whispered his Yeerk.

…and you cannot leave me, Aximili finished suddenly, despair tainting his voice. You cannot.

It's me you lose or the Animorphs, Aximili. Me or the Animorphs and Earth. Me, or… or cinnabons. Probably… probably your own planet as well. You know I'm right. She was pleading herself now, willing him to understand, even willing him to place his military training, his military instincts, his Andalite pride, above the perplexing turmoil that was his emotions. Why would you value me over all that?

For I… But again he hesitated, even in his thoughts unable to form the words. For I would miss you, he tried weakly, and he knew that the Yeerk felt his lie.

Issetha found no use in letting their discussion drag on any longer. They were wasting precious time.

I have finally come up with a name to call you, Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill, she whispered.

What is it?

Leefachir, said the Yeerk simply, and then she was gone, dropping the decimetre or so from his ear and down into the water of the pool.

Aximili's hands grabbed desperately after her, a piercing cry of No! echoing through the minds of everyone present. But the Yeerk was gone.

And the Andalite sat on the end of the pier, staring at his empty hands, her last word circling in his mind, giving him no peace.

'Leefachir'. Spoken in Galard, the intergalactic language; it was a word for beloved.

And as he could do nothing but watch the pool and the masses of Yeerks in it, he would never hear her repeat it.


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Author's Note;

Can't seem to make these chapters short – not to mention the notes. The by-now-notorious picture of Ax by the pool is moved to the beginning of the next chapter… it'll be obvious where. (And yes, there is a next chapter.)

Note the little text at the top. It's probably best if I disclaim it, so I will; it doesn't belong to me. It belongs to Leonard Cohen. I just listen to the music and liked the text… enough to "borrow" a bit to add here. There'll probably be one for each of the remaining chapters, if I can find them. They're all hereby formally disclaimed as well, just in case.

In other news, yes, I know Ax might not have been completely in character here towards the end. I might have been overoptimistic about the drastic change of his relationship with Issetha when I started jotting down things for this story… but I'm not taking it away, or changing it (unless there's a spelling mistake or similar). That last sentence is a shiver-down-my-spine-must-read-more sentence. I love it, I'm keeping it, and if you intend to flame me because of it, then go right ahead.

Then again, if you liked it, you're welcome to tell me that, too. *brilliant smile*