Immobilized By My Fear
Catch me as I fall
Say you're here and it's all over now
Speaking to the atmosphere
No one's here and I fall into myself
This truth drives me into madness
I know I can stop the pain if I will it all away
Don't turn away
Don't give into the pain
Don't try to hide
Through they're screaming your name
Don't close your eyes
God knows what leaves behind them
Don't turn of the light
Never sleep never die
I'm frightened by what I see
But somehow I know that there's much more to come
Immobilized by my fear
And soon to be blinded by tears
I can stop the pain if I will it all away
Don't turn away
Don't give into the pain
Don't try to hide
Through they're screaming your name
Don't close your eyes
God knows what leaves behind them
Don't turn of the light
Never sleep never die
Fallen angels at my feet
Whispered voices at my ear
Death before my eyes
Lying next to me I fear
She beckons me shall I give in
Upon my end shall I begin
Forsaking all I've fallen for I rise to meet the end
('Whispers' by Evanescence off the album 'Fallen'.)
They had all gone out over the full moon and Remus was back in school and they were all quit excited about what had happened, well part from Remus himself who was a little embarrassed about what had happened between him and Nissa who didn't seem bothered herself.
"That wasn't so bad, I had a great time." Nissa told them as they walked down the corridor. "I have done anything like that in years, it's so great to be able to change on the full moon; and not have to hide what you are. Well not from you lot anyway."
"I'm glad you enjoyed it." Sirius told her. "And you were gorgeous, beautiful; I've seen pictures of werewolf's before but none of them was like what you turned into. Don't you agree Remus?"
"What, oh yeah." Remus answered.
Nissa smiled at him. "I told you it didn't matter; I've done a lot more embarrassing thing's then that."
"I'm just surprised that she went for you Sirius and not Remus." James said. "Well yeah you're going out, but so what you were a werewolf and so is Remus."
"She wouldn't have chosen me; she would have never chosen me; not after they've mated." Remus said.
Sirius glared at him, he hadn't told James and they had never really said that they had done anything though they both knew they had. Nissa though didn't seem at all bothered at this news; James though was staring at Sirius looking at little hurt that he hadn't been told.
"You never said anything." James said finally.
"I would have, I just didn't want to make a big deal about it." Sirius told him and then turned to Remus. "What do you mean?"
"The two of you mated, it isn't a lit thing for a werewolf they mate for life." Remus told him.
Now Nissa was paying attention and had stopped as had everyone else, Remus looked from one to the other and realised that she had never told him this little detail.
"So what does that mean?" Sirius asked slowly trying to understand. "That we're like married or something according to werewolves?"
"No." Nissa said.
"Well yes really." Remus corrected her.
"Thank you, you're not helping." Nissa told him and then turned back to Sirius. "It is like that yes, but I didn't take you as my mate."
"The two of you slept together, so yeah it does." Remus told her.
"I still can't believe that you slept together." James said. "When did it happen?"
"No it doesn't." Nissa said ignoring James' question because this was more important. "I didn't take you as my mate, I wouldn't have."
"What's that suppose to mean, I'm not good enough for you or something?" Sirius demanded annoyed with her.
"NO! And wait a minute, you were just annoyed that I could have taken you as my mate, and now your annoyed because I said I wouldn't" Nissa said getting quit confused. "For one thing, I was only fourteen at the time; way too young to do what I did. So I wouldn't have taken you as my mate, and another; I'm not a normal werewolf, see."
And right there in front of them all she changed into a werewolf, they all fell backwards as though they were afraid she might attack them; but she didn't and she changed back again.
"See, I don't need a full moon to change." Nissa told them. "And Sirius I would have told you first."
Nissa turned round and walked away, leaving them all studded at her transformation and staring at Sirius waiting for answers.
"I don't want to talk about it." Sirius told them. "I can't believe she didn't tell me, why didn't you; you knew."
"It wasn't my place, and I thought you knew at less about the mate for life thing." Remus told him.
"That was still cool though what she just did." James said.
***
Thing's didn't go to well over the next couple of weeks, Nissa didn't talk to any of them and Sirius had taken to ignoring her completely well so had she. No one knew part from them why they had broken up, but took it as being normal because they were always like that.
"I knew it wouldn't last." Ella told Nissa who ignored her.
"So he's back on the market then?" Polly asked. "Oh, not that I wouldn't of course; not that he isn't gorgeous and everything, but you two might make up soon."
"I don't think that we'll be getting back together." Nissa told them.
"I'm sorry." Lily told her, even though she had never been a big fan of them being together in the first place; but they had gone quit well together. "But you never know, you might."
They walked down into Potion's, not their favourite lesson for a couple of reasons. Nissa though hadn't mind it as much as last year, because Jevidah had been staying clear of her; probably a warning from Infidus.
Nissa paired up with Severus as normal, who was very glad that she and Sirius weren't going out anymore he had never liked them being together in the first place; though of course she didn't tell him why they had broken up.
Jevidah had told them all what to do, and was now walking among the desks making comments to everyone; well to the Gryffindor's of course none to his own house.
But when he got to Nissa's caldron, he led up close and whispered. "I haven't forgotten what you and your friends did, and as Infidus always says if you do something wrong you should be punished."
Nissa looked at him wondering what he could mean, but didn't dare to ask; but when she had turned she silted a little of her potion on his robes which burnt a hole. He looked down at himself and then smiled at her.
"Detention." Jevidah announced.
Severus looked over at them wondering why she ahd gotten detention because she hadn't done anything, and he wasn't the only one annoyed about this.
"That's just wrong." Lily whispered.
"I know she didn't even do anything." Natalie whispered back.
"I don't like the sound of that." James whispered.
"Who cares?" Sirius said off handily. "I'm not going out with her anymore, so she isn't my problem."
"She was just a problem to you?" Remus asked, but Sirius never answered his question.
***
Nissa was sat with Lily in the Great Hall she wasn't really eating because her detention was praying on her mind, which she would have to leave for in a couple of minutes; she remembered her last detention with him he had kidnapped her using a Portkey and then she had to deal with Infidus, so of course she wasn't looking forward to this.
She got up to leave, both James and Remus looked up at her but Sirius just carried on eating; they gave her reassuring smiles which she did back and then went down to the dungeon's.
"Why aren't you bothered?" James asked him irritated by his behaviour.
"What it's just a detention." Sirius said.
Nissa knocked on the door then waited for an answer. "Come in." She opened the door slowly and then walked into the classroom; she hated being here on her own with him.
Jevidah smiled at her as she walked into the classroom, he whispered a spell and the door closed and locked behind her. Nissa stopped dead, knowing that wasn't a good sign.
"Well it is nice to see you." Jevidah told her. "How lucky of you to get the detention, we have a lot of catching up to do."
Jevidah smiled at her as he walked over, but Nissa back away from him making sure that there were tables and caldron's in there way; but this being his classroom he knew it very well and was able to move in-between the tables with ease to get too her.
"What's wrong I was hoping to put everything behind us." Jevidah told her.
"Of course you were." Nissa said.
He moved the tables blocking her way out of the corner, the only way was past him; he smiled at her as he moved closer. Nissa was right up against the table, he pulled out his wand and pointed it at her; without thinking she kicked it out of his hand.
"Now, now we'll have none of that." Jevidah told her and quickly made for her, he grabbed her wrist and pulled her head down and injected something in the back of her neck; then let her go smiling.
"It'll take a little while to start working, but the move you fight it the quicker it'll start working." Jevidah told her as she rubbed her neck panicking wondering what it could be.
He smiled at her as he stepped forward. "Something Infidus lent me."
"What, no he wouldn't." Nissa said suddenly realising what it was even more panicked now knowing what it is.
He stocked her arm as he did she moved away from him but there was no where for her to go, and they both knew it.
'Sirius please hear me.' Nissa pleaded.
Sirius was sat in the common room with his friends when he suddenly heard her voice in his head, it had been a while but he still knew; but this time he wasn't having any of it.
'Leave me alone!' Sirius shouted back at her.
Nissa closed her eyes, he was her only hope. Jevidah smiled as he pressed against her and stroked her arms pulling her into him, she could feel his bulge through his trousers; she didn't feel the same as she had when Sirius had been this close to her, she was terrified.
He tried to kiss her but she moved her face away he grabbed hold of it so that he could kiss her and then with his other hand, he moved it up until he reached her breasts and began to massage them eagerly.
She pushed him back with all her strength and he fell into the table behind them, Nissa quickly made to leave but he grabbed her ankle and she fell to the floor; he pulled her towards him as she tried to kick him off. He crawled on top of her as she continued too kick and hit him.
'Sirius please!' Nissa screamed.
Sirius suddenly shocked his head at hearing her so loudly, it was normally so soft and soaring; he waved his arm's. 'Kwit it!'
"Are you alright?" James asked him concerned by his behaviour.
"I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?" Sirius said, ignoring the voice screaming in his mind.
Jevidah pulled at her robes but she wouldn't let him take them off, instead he ripped them open making her jump and him smile by her reaction. He opened his own robe, and then started on hers again; he led into her and kissed her cheek.
'Sirius.' Nissa whispered into the darkness one last time, but he balmy heard it and chose to ignore it just as before.
"You're mine." Jevidah whispered she crawled at his hands but they wouldn't change; she had no magic it was gone.
He fell on top of her after it was all over, holding her. Nissa wanted to kick him off of her, to get him out of her; to run and hide to be anywhere but here. He lifted his head and smiled at her.
"I'm glad that you enjoyed that, I'll look forward to the next time." Jevidah told her pleasantly.
Nissa looked away from her, screaming in her mind.
***
Nissa left the dungeon's and went outside, not wanting to be near anyone; not wanting anyone to see her because they would know as soon as they looked at her what she had aloud him to do to her.
She never went back to Gryffindor tower that night, or went for breakfast either the next morning.
"I can't believe that she didn't come back last night." Lily said.
"Yeah I know, I haven't seen her since she went to that detention." Natalie said.
James and Remus were listening to their conversance trying to pick through what they were saying, but they didn't really need to listen for long to realise what was going on.
"Aren't you even bothered considering what happened last time?" Remus asked him again.
"Of course he is, that's why he's acting like this." James said suddenly realising his behaviour.
Sirius didn't answer any of them he was trying not to think about any of it, trying to put it out of his mind now that she was; but it wasn't working he could still hear her from time to time.
They went to Transfiguration, Nissa arrived with them all and sat down just like normal as though nothing had happened; they all looked at her when they saw her and bombarded her with questions.
"Are you alright?" Lily asked.
"Why didn't you come back?" Polly asked.
"Did something happen?" Natalie asked.
"Did you even go to the detention?" Ella asked her.
Nissa didn't answer one of their question's she just moved un- comfortably in her chair.
"See she's fine." Sirius hissed at James, but he still didn't fully believe what he was saying himself.
Remus of course knew he could smell him and she knew it, she moved out of his eye line because she could feel him watching her; and she wished that he wouldn't.
She didn't stick around long enough for anyone to really question her about her disappearing yesterday, and then she disappears after dinner; she never turn's up for Potion's.
"I'm sure that one of you will tell Miss Tiania that she now has another detention for missing this lesson." Jevidah told the Gryffindor's, but smiled oddly at Sirius, James and Remus.
Remus was far to angry to even speak, Sirius was ignoring him with all his will power trying to pretend that nothing was happening and get on as normal.
Nissa never turned up to their next lesson but she did to her other from what they heard. She was seen again until next morning for class, where she was told the bad news.
"Why weren't you in Potion's, he said you have another detention because you didn't show." Lily told her. "What's going on?"
"Nothing." Nissa said as she stepped back right into Remus, she couldn't even look him in the face.
"Of course there is, you never miss a class even if your with us and one of those other lessons is going on you don't even seem too miss them." Lily said.
"I don't want to talk about it." Nissa told her.
"That's just it; you never want to talk about anything you just keep everything to yourself." Sirius said as he walked past her to the ladder. "Like it would hurt you to let someone in."
Nissa lost control she lunged at Sirius before Remus could stop her, she punched him in the face making him fell backwards on the ground pulling her on top of him because he was so shocked at her out burst; blooding was running down his face. He looked up at her shocked by her behaviour, she looked down at him ready to hit him again when she suddenly realised what she was doing; she quickly got to her feet and ran all the way back down too the school.
James helped him to his feet while everyone was still staring at him; Remus though wasn't at all friendly towards him as they took him to the hospital wing.
"Come on Remus, she was the one who hit him." James told him.
"And he desired it." Remus told him, making them all stop.
"She hit me, look blood and everything." Sirius said.
"You care about her, why don't you stop pretending." Remus told him. "She needs you and you're hurting her even more."
"What does that mean?" Sirius asked. "I thought we've already been over this, I'm not her mate and she never wanted me to be."
It suddenly hit Remus what it was, what had upset him so much it wasn't that she hadn't told him but because she had said that she wouldn't have taken him as her mate.
"Sirius, it doesn't matter what she might have said; people say one thing to covering up for their feeling's." Remus told him. "Do you remember that I said that I could smell her on you afterwards? Well yesterday morning, I didn't smell you on her; I smelt someone else."
"What, I bet it was Snape." Sirius shouted completely losing his mind.
"Don't be so stupid. It was Jevidah." Remus told him.
Sirius stepped back as though someone had hit him in the face again. "No, no you're wrong; it can't be. Because then that would mean..." But he couldn't bring himself to say it.
James looked from Sirius to Remus. "He's right, it can't be."
"Of course it can." Remus said. "It would explain a lot, it isn't you it's him."
Sirius turned away from them as he told them. "It is me as well if its true and I know it is. She can contract me magical, she did she...I told her to leave me alone."
They all looked at him, he wouldn't face them how could he after what he had just told them; he had let them all down and he had let her down, because he was so stubborn.
Sirius walked away but not towards the hospital wing, none of them tried to stop him as he left; what would they say? He walked down the entrance hall and stood at the open door for a while looking out over the grounds, and then walked out after a while he changed into the bear like dog and ran as fast as he could towards the forest.
He entered the forest it was different from last time he had come in here looking for her, one he hadn't been on his own and another it had been at night. He walked for over an hour trying to use his dog senses to find her but he couldn't it was as though she had put some sort of block up so that he couldn't find her, but he wasn't going to give up even if he had to stay out here all night by himself.
Sirius heard someone behind him and changed back into himself as he turned round, to see Nissa there; it had taken him over an hour half and he couldn't find but she had come to him.
"What the hell do you want?" Nissa asked him wryly. "He told you didn't he?"
"Sorry is a little hollow, but what else can I say." Sirius said. "That I'm a clueless idiot who doesn't desire someone like you, because I am. Especially because I didn't listen to you, I was annoyed; but I knew what he was like and I still did nothing. I'm fifteen almost sixteen; I was scared that I was committing in away more then I wanted or was ready for. And I lost sight of everything else."
Nissa looked at him for a while before she said anything. "I'm fifteen myself, I wasn't asking for a commitment, because I knew that you couldn't give it; but I wasn't looking for one either. But...I..." Nissa couldn't say anymore it was to much the tears were blinding as she suck to the ground, Sirius knelt down beside her wanting to take her in his arms; but not wanting to hurt her again. "I could have done something, why didn't I?"
"You did, it was me; you did everything that you could." Sirius told her, she looked up at him her face shined with tears and more leaking through her beautiful red eyes; making him want to cry with her.
"I could have, before he took my magic." Nissa told him slowly.
"What do you mean he took your magic?" Sirius asked her horrified. "You contacted me."
"Yes, with the last of my magic." Nissa told him.
Sirius couldn't believe what she was telling him, she had put all her hope in him; and he had let her down.
"I have it back now though, it was only short term." Nissa went on. "But I'm not going too that detention, I can't."
"Of course, I would think you crazy if you did go; not that I would have let you." Sirius told her.
Nissa moved a little closer to him, her long pinkish red hair falling forward over her shoulders he couldn't help but reach out for her; she pushed him away at first but he wouldn't let her go, he took her in his arms and she just cried. He knew she didn't want anything off him just for him to hold her and make her feel safe, but he realised that wanted and needed so much more.
Thing's were different this time, they weren't going out they were just friends; she didn't go out with them on the next full moon. And she also didn't go to the detention's losing Gryffindor twenty points, not that many people knew about it; she did the detentions with Professor McGonagall who she tried more times then she could remember to tell her what had happened but could never bring her self to do so.
Catch me as I fall
Say you're here and it's all over now
Speaking to the atmosphere
No one's here and I fall into myself
This truth drives me into madness
I know I can stop the pain if I will it all away
Don't turn away
Don't give into the pain
Don't try to hide
Through they're screaming your name
Don't close your eyes
God knows what leaves behind them
Don't turn of the light
Never sleep never die
I'm frightened by what I see
But somehow I know that there's much more to come
Immobilized by my fear
And soon to be blinded by tears
I can stop the pain if I will it all away
Don't turn away
Don't give into the pain
Don't try to hide
Through they're screaming your name
Don't close your eyes
God knows what leaves behind them
Don't turn of the light
Never sleep never die
Fallen angels at my feet
Whispered voices at my ear
Death before my eyes
Lying next to me I fear
She beckons me shall I give in
Upon my end shall I begin
Forsaking all I've fallen for I rise to meet the end
('Whispers' by Evanescence off the album 'Fallen'.)
They had all gone out over the full moon and Remus was back in school and they were all quit excited about what had happened, well part from Remus himself who was a little embarrassed about what had happened between him and Nissa who didn't seem bothered herself.
"That wasn't so bad, I had a great time." Nissa told them as they walked down the corridor. "I have done anything like that in years, it's so great to be able to change on the full moon; and not have to hide what you are. Well not from you lot anyway."
"I'm glad you enjoyed it." Sirius told her. "And you were gorgeous, beautiful; I've seen pictures of werewolf's before but none of them was like what you turned into. Don't you agree Remus?"
"What, oh yeah." Remus answered.
Nissa smiled at him. "I told you it didn't matter; I've done a lot more embarrassing thing's then that."
"I'm just surprised that she went for you Sirius and not Remus." James said. "Well yeah you're going out, but so what you were a werewolf and so is Remus."
"She wouldn't have chosen me; she would have never chosen me; not after they've mated." Remus said.
Sirius glared at him, he hadn't told James and they had never really said that they had done anything though they both knew they had. Nissa though didn't seem at all bothered at this news; James though was staring at Sirius looking at little hurt that he hadn't been told.
"You never said anything." James said finally.
"I would have, I just didn't want to make a big deal about it." Sirius told him and then turned to Remus. "What do you mean?"
"The two of you mated, it isn't a lit thing for a werewolf they mate for life." Remus told him.
Now Nissa was paying attention and had stopped as had everyone else, Remus looked from one to the other and realised that she had never told him this little detail.
"So what does that mean?" Sirius asked slowly trying to understand. "That we're like married or something according to werewolves?"
"No." Nissa said.
"Well yes really." Remus corrected her.
"Thank you, you're not helping." Nissa told him and then turned back to Sirius. "It is like that yes, but I didn't take you as my mate."
"The two of you slept together, so yeah it does." Remus told her.
"I still can't believe that you slept together." James said. "When did it happen?"
"No it doesn't." Nissa said ignoring James' question because this was more important. "I didn't take you as my mate, I wouldn't have."
"What's that suppose to mean, I'm not good enough for you or something?" Sirius demanded annoyed with her.
"NO! And wait a minute, you were just annoyed that I could have taken you as my mate, and now your annoyed because I said I wouldn't" Nissa said getting quit confused. "For one thing, I was only fourteen at the time; way too young to do what I did. So I wouldn't have taken you as my mate, and another; I'm not a normal werewolf, see."
And right there in front of them all she changed into a werewolf, they all fell backwards as though they were afraid she might attack them; but she didn't and she changed back again.
"See, I don't need a full moon to change." Nissa told them. "And Sirius I would have told you first."
Nissa turned round and walked away, leaving them all studded at her transformation and staring at Sirius waiting for answers.
"I don't want to talk about it." Sirius told them. "I can't believe she didn't tell me, why didn't you; you knew."
"It wasn't my place, and I thought you knew at less about the mate for life thing." Remus told him.
"That was still cool though what she just did." James said.
***
Thing's didn't go to well over the next couple of weeks, Nissa didn't talk to any of them and Sirius had taken to ignoring her completely well so had she. No one knew part from them why they had broken up, but took it as being normal because they were always like that.
"I knew it wouldn't last." Ella told Nissa who ignored her.
"So he's back on the market then?" Polly asked. "Oh, not that I wouldn't of course; not that he isn't gorgeous and everything, but you two might make up soon."
"I don't think that we'll be getting back together." Nissa told them.
"I'm sorry." Lily told her, even though she had never been a big fan of them being together in the first place; but they had gone quit well together. "But you never know, you might."
They walked down into Potion's, not their favourite lesson for a couple of reasons. Nissa though hadn't mind it as much as last year, because Jevidah had been staying clear of her; probably a warning from Infidus.
Nissa paired up with Severus as normal, who was very glad that she and Sirius weren't going out anymore he had never liked them being together in the first place; though of course she didn't tell him why they had broken up.
Jevidah had told them all what to do, and was now walking among the desks making comments to everyone; well to the Gryffindor's of course none to his own house.
But when he got to Nissa's caldron, he led up close and whispered. "I haven't forgotten what you and your friends did, and as Infidus always says if you do something wrong you should be punished."
Nissa looked at him wondering what he could mean, but didn't dare to ask; but when she had turned she silted a little of her potion on his robes which burnt a hole. He looked down at himself and then smiled at her.
"Detention." Jevidah announced.
Severus looked over at them wondering why she ahd gotten detention because she hadn't done anything, and he wasn't the only one annoyed about this.
"That's just wrong." Lily whispered.
"I know she didn't even do anything." Natalie whispered back.
"I don't like the sound of that." James whispered.
"Who cares?" Sirius said off handily. "I'm not going out with her anymore, so she isn't my problem."
"She was just a problem to you?" Remus asked, but Sirius never answered his question.
***
Nissa was sat with Lily in the Great Hall she wasn't really eating because her detention was praying on her mind, which she would have to leave for in a couple of minutes; she remembered her last detention with him he had kidnapped her using a Portkey and then she had to deal with Infidus, so of course she wasn't looking forward to this.
She got up to leave, both James and Remus looked up at her but Sirius just carried on eating; they gave her reassuring smiles which she did back and then went down to the dungeon's.
"Why aren't you bothered?" James asked him irritated by his behaviour.
"What it's just a detention." Sirius said.
Nissa knocked on the door then waited for an answer. "Come in." She opened the door slowly and then walked into the classroom; she hated being here on her own with him.
Jevidah smiled at her as she walked into the classroom, he whispered a spell and the door closed and locked behind her. Nissa stopped dead, knowing that wasn't a good sign.
"Well it is nice to see you." Jevidah told her. "How lucky of you to get the detention, we have a lot of catching up to do."
Jevidah smiled at her as he walked over, but Nissa back away from him making sure that there were tables and caldron's in there way; but this being his classroom he knew it very well and was able to move in-between the tables with ease to get too her.
"What's wrong I was hoping to put everything behind us." Jevidah told her.
"Of course you were." Nissa said.
He moved the tables blocking her way out of the corner, the only way was past him; he smiled at her as he moved closer. Nissa was right up against the table, he pulled out his wand and pointed it at her; without thinking she kicked it out of his hand.
"Now, now we'll have none of that." Jevidah told her and quickly made for her, he grabbed her wrist and pulled her head down and injected something in the back of her neck; then let her go smiling.
"It'll take a little while to start working, but the move you fight it the quicker it'll start working." Jevidah told her as she rubbed her neck panicking wondering what it could be.
He smiled at her as he stepped forward. "Something Infidus lent me."
"What, no he wouldn't." Nissa said suddenly realising what it was even more panicked now knowing what it is.
He stocked her arm as he did she moved away from him but there was no where for her to go, and they both knew it.
'Sirius please hear me.' Nissa pleaded.
Sirius was sat in the common room with his friends when he suddenly heard her voice in his head, it had been a while but he still knew; but this time he wasn't having any of it.
'Leave me alone!' Sirius shouted back at her.
Nissa closed her eyes, he was her only hope. Jevidah smiled as he pressed against her and stroked her arms pulling her into him, she could feel his bulge through his trousers; she didn't feel the same as she had when Sirius had been this close to her, she was terrified.
He tried to kiss her but she moved her face away he grabbed hold of it so that he could kiss her and then with his other hand, he moved it up until he reached her breasts and began to massage them eagerly.
She pushed him back with all her strength and he fell into the table behind them, Nissa quickly made to leave but he grabbed her ankle and she fell to the floor; he pulled her towards him as she tried to kick him off. He crawled on top of her as she continued too kick and hit him.
'Sirius please!' Nissa screamed.
Sirius suddenly shocked his head at hearing her so loudly, it was normally so soft and soaring; he waved his arm's. 'Kwit it!'
"Are you alright?" James asked him concerned by his behaviour.
"I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?" Sirius said, ignoring the voice screaming in his mind.
Jevidah pulled at her robes but she wouldn't let him take them off, instead he ripped them open making her jump and him smile by her reaction. He opened his own robe, and then started on hers again; he led into her and kissed her cheek.
'Sirius.' Nissa whispered into the darkness one last time, but he balmy heard it and chose to ignore it just as before.
"You're mine." Jevidah whispered she crawled at his hands but they wouldn't change; she had no magic it was gone.
He fell on top of her after it was all over, holding her. Nissa wanted to kick him off of her, to get him out of her; to run and hide to be anywhere but here. He lifted his head and smiled at her.
"I'm glad that you enjoyed that, I'll look forward to the next time." Jevidah told her pleasantly.
Nissa looked away from her, screaming in her mind.
***
Nissa left the dungeon's and went outside, not wanting to be near anyone; not wanting anyone to see her because they would know as soon as they looked at her what she had aloud him to do to her.
She never went back to Gryffindor tower that night, or went for breakfast either the next morning.
"I can't believe that she didn't come back last night." Lily said.
"Yeah I know, I haven't seen her since she went to that detention." Natalie said.
James and Remus were listening to their conversance trying to pick through what they were saying, but they didn't really need to listen for long to realise what was going on.
"Aren't you even bothered considering what happened last time?" Remus asked him again.
"Of course he is, that's why he's acting like this." James said suddenly realising his behaviour.
Sirius didn't answer any of them he was trying not to think about any of it, trying to put it out of his mind now that she was; but it wasn't working he could still hear her from time to time.
They went to Transfiguration, Nissa arrived with them all and sat down just like normal as though nothing had happened; they all looked at her when they saw her and bombarded her with questions.
"Are you alright?" Lily asked.
"Why didn't you come back?" Polly asked.
"Did something happen?" Natalie asked.
"Did you even go to the detention?" Ella asked her.
Nissa didn't answer one of their question's she just moved un- comfortably in her chair.
"See she's fine." Sirius hissed at James, but he still didn't fully believe what he was saying himself.
Remus of course knew he could smell him and she knew it, she moved out of his eye line because she could feel him watching her; and she wished that he wouldn't.
She didn't stick around long enough for anyone to really question her about her disappearing yesterday, and then she disappears after dinner; she never turn's up for Potion's.
"I'm sure that one of you will tell Miss Tiania that she now has another detention for missing this lesson." Jevidah told the Gryffindor's, but smiled oddly at Sirius, James and Remus.
Remus was far to angry to even speak, Sirius was ignoring him with all his will power trying to pretend that nothing was happening and get on as normal.
Nissa never turned up to their next lesson but she did to her other from what they heard. She was seen again until next morning for class, where she was told the bad news.
"Why weren't you in Potion's, he said you have another detention because you didn't show." Lily told her. "What's going on?"
"Nothing." Nissa said as she stepped back right into Remus, she couldn't even look him in the face.
"Of course there is, you never miss a class even if your with us and one of those other lessons is going on you don't even seem too miss them." Lily said.
"I don't want to talk about it." Nissa told her.
"That's just it; you never want to talk about anything you just keep everything to yourself." Sirius said as he walked past her to the ladder. "Like it would hurt you to let someone in."
Nissa lost control she lunged at Sirius before Remus could stop her, she punched him in the face making him fell backwards on the ground pulling her on top of him because he was so shocked at her out burst; blooding was running down his face. He looked up at her shocked by her behaviour, she looked down at him ready to hit him again when she suddenly realised what she was doing; she quickly got to her feet and ran all the way back down too the school.
James helped him to his feet while everyone was still staring at him; Remus though wasn't at all friendly towards him as they took him to the hospital wing.
"Come on Remus, she was the one who hit him." James told him.
"And he desired it." Remus told him, making them all stop.
"She hit me, look blood and everything." Sirius said.
"You care about her, why don't you stop pretending." Remus told him. "She needs you and you're hurting her even more."
"What does that mean?" Sirius asked. "I thought we've already been over this, I'm not her mate and she never wanted me to be."
It suddenly hit Remus what it was, what had upset him so much it wasn't that she hadn't told him but because she had said that she wouldn't have taken him as her mate.
"Sirius, it doesn't matter what she might have said; people say one thing to covering up for their feeling's." Remus told him. "Do you remember that I said that I could smell her on you afterwards? Well yesterday morning, I didn't smell you on her; I smelt someone else."
"What, I bet it was Snape." Sirius shouted completely losing his mind.
"Don't be so stupid. It was Jevidah." Remus told him.
Sirius stepped back as though someone had hit him in the face again. "No, no you're wrong; it can't be. Because then that would mean..." But he couldn't bring himself to say it.
James looked from Sirius to Remus. "He's right, it can't be."
"Of course it can." Remus said. "It would explain a lot, it isn't you it's him."
Sirius turned away from them as he told them. "It is me as well if its true and I know it is. She can contract me magical, she did she...I told her to leave me alone."
They all looked at him, he wouldn't face them how could he after what he had just told them; he had let them all down and he had let her down, because he was so stubborn.
Sirius walked away but not towards the hospital wing, none of them tried to stop him as he left; what would they say? He walked down the entrance hall and stood at the open door for a while looking out over the grounds, and then walked out after a while he changed into the bear like dog and ran as fast as he could towards the forest.
He entered the forest it was different from last time he had come in here looking for her, one he hadn't been on his own and another it had been at night. He walked for over an hour trying to use his dog senses to find her but he couldn't it was as though she had put some sort of block up so that he couldn't find her, but he wasn't going to give up even if he had to stay out here all night by himself.
Sirius heard someone behind him and changed back into himself as he turned round, to see Nissa there; it had taken him over an hour half and he couldn't find but she had come to him.
"What the hell do you want?" Nissa asked him wryly. "He told you didn't he?"
"Sorry is a little hollow, but what else can I say." Sirius said. "That I'm a clueless idiot who doesn't desire someone like you, because I am. Especially because I didn't listen to you, I was annoyed; but I knew what he was like and I still did nothing. I'm fifteen almost sixteen; I was scared that I was committing in away more then I wanted or was ready for. And I lost sight of everything else."
Nissa looked at him for a while before she said anything. "I'm fifteen myself, I wasn't asking for a commitment, because I knew that you couldn't give it; but I wasn't looking for one either. But...I..." Nissa couldn't say anymore it was to much the tears were blinding as she suck to the ground, Sirius knelt down beside her wanting to take her in his arms; but not wanting to hurt her again. "I could have done something, why didn't I?"
"You did, it was me; you did everything that you could." Sirius told her, she looked up at him her face shined with tears and more leaking through her beautiful red eyes; making him want to cry with her.
"I could have, before he took my magic." Nissa told him slowly.
"What do you mean he took your magic?" Sirius asked her horrified. "You contacted me."
"Yes, with the last of my magic." Nissa told him.
Sirius couldn't believe what she was telling him, she had put all her hope in him; and he had let her down.
"I have it back now though, it was only short term." Nissa went on. "But I'm not going too that detention, I can't."
"Of course, I would think you crazy if you did go; not that I would have let you." Sirius told her.
Nissa moved a little closer to him, her long pinkish red hair falling forward over her shoulders he couldn't help but reach out for her; she pushed him away at first but he wouldn't let her go, he took her in his arms and she just cried. He knew she didn't want anything off him just for him to hold her and make her feel safe, but he realised that wanted and needed so much more.
Thing's were different this time, they weren't going out they were just friends; she didn't go out with them on the next full moon. And she also didn't go to the detention's losing Gryffindor twenty points, not that many people knew about it; she did the detentions with Professor McGonagall who she tried more times then she could remember to tell her what had happened but could never bring her self to do so.