~*~Disclaimer=me no own~*~62 reviews! So very happy! Hopefully this chapter
will be longer than the last but I don't know-your reviews have been really
helpful! Phaser lady, your review made my day! It will probably get a bit
angst soon though-after all the poor lad's a bit traumatised!~*~
"How is he?"
"As well as can be expected. He's sleeping a lot-though only in short bursts-he's been having nightmares and gets confused and disorientated once he awakens, I had to sedate him to calm him down. He's getting better; though trace elements of the virus remain they shouldn't cause any problems. It's taken a lot out of him."
"I understand, has he talked to you at all?"
"He refuses to say a word-but he talks in his sleep."
"What does he say?"
"It's all very jumbled, but it appears he was told we were all dead and feels guilty."
"They told him we were dead? But hasn't he realised seeing us all here?"
"I don't know, he probably thought it was a hallucination or a trick of some kind."
"Let me know when he next wakes up,"
"Certainly Captain."
"Phlox? Will he be alright?"
"We'll just have to see how things go; it depends on the circumstances and the person."
* * *
Malcolm opened his eyes and stared blankly at the ceiling.
He felt exhausted despite only just having woken up. Everything still hurt but he wasn't in as much pain as before.
*Thank god for morphine!*
((A/n I have no idea if they used morphine-but for the purpose of this-they do!))
He tried to sit up but gave up after a few attempts.
*All this looks so real, maybe the Jennerns were lying, but maybe they weren't. Still isn't this better than not having anybody left at all? After all they say ignorance is bliss.
Oh don't be so bloody stupid Malcolm!
I think I'll wait and see what happens....why bother? I failed anyway; I broke under pressure and told them all they needed to know. But in my defence I was ill at the time.
Oh so now I admit I was ill! Not when it really mattered! I had the bloody chance to admit it before we left but no! I was stubborn and refused to admit I was ill!
There's no one to blame but me.
It's all my fault.*
A voice snapped him out of his dismal thoughts: "Malcolm?"
He focused on the person stood next to the biobed. Phlox.
"How're you feeling?"
He thought about opening his mouth and replying but found he couldn't force any sound to come out.
Phlox nodded.
*He pities me. He pities me! I don't want his god damn pity!*
"Well you'll be glad to know your fever's down,"
*Break out the banners and lets all celebrate!*
"Commander Tucker's been into to see you quite a few times, you've had everybody worried."
*Liar*
"The Captain's asked to see you,"
*I feel so privileged; honestly this is my caring face. I mean I can hardly hold a nice conversation with the people I betrayed can I? *
"Do you feel up to seeing him now?"
*Whatever I say you're going to call him anyway so lets not beat about the bush here.*
Malcolm turned away.
"I'm here if you need to talk,"
*I....can't. Don't pretend to care-everybody must despise me for what I've done.
Why don't you just bog off and go play with your creatures of doom?*
Malcolm looked back at Phlox briefly before resuming staring at the ceiling.
Phlox crossed the room to the comm.
"Sickbay to Captain Archer."
"Archer here."
"He's woken up Captain, I'm afraid he's not very talkative though,"
"That's ok, thanks for letting me know. Archer out."
Malcolm sighed.
*What do I want?
Do I want everybody to forgive me?
Is this even Enterprise?
But am I letting down everybody by not talking? Or am I saving them by keeping silent?
Bloody hell, I'm confused.
I'm the bleedin' armoury officer and I'm confused.
It would be so much easier if I would just die.*
~*~Please review! I really wanna know what you think!~*~
"How is he?"
"As well as can be expected. He's sleeping a lot-though only in short bursts-he's been having nightmares and gets confused and disorientated once he awakens, I had to sedate him to calm him down. He's getting better; though trace elements of the virus remain they shouldn't cause any problems. It's taken a lot out of him."
"I understand, has he talked to you at all?"
"He refuses to say a word-but he talks in his sleep."
"What does he say?"
"It's all very jumbled, but it appears he was told we were all dead and feels guilty."
"They told him we were dead? But hasn't he realised seeing us all here?"
"I don't know, he probably thought it was a hallucination or a trick of some kind."
"Let me know when he next wakes up,"
"Certainly Captain."
"Phlox? Will he be alright?"
"We'll just have to see how things go; it depends on the circumstances and the person."
* * *
Malcolm opened his eyes and stared blankly at the ceiling.
He felt exhausted despite only just having woken up. Everything still hurt but he wasn't in as much pain as before.
*Thank god for morphine!*
((A/n I have no idea if they used morphine-but for the purpose of this-they do!))
He tried to sit up but gave up after a few attempts.
*All this looks so real, maybe the Jennerns were lying, but maybe they weren't. Still isn't this better than not having anybody left at all? After all they say ignorance is bliss.
Oh don't be so bloody stupid Malcolm!
I think I'll wait and see what happens....why bother? I failed anyway; I broke under pressure and told them all they needed to know. But in my defence I was ill at the time.
Oh so now I admit I was ill! Not when it really mattered! I had the bloody chance to admit it before we left but no! I was stubborn and refused to admit I was ill!
There's no one to blame but me.
It's all my fault.*
A voice snapped him out of his dismal thoughts: "Malcolm?"
He focused on the person stood next to the biobed. Phlox.
"How're you feeling?"
He thought about opening his mouth and replying but found he couldn't force any sound to come out.
Phlox nodded.
*He pities me. He pities me! I don't want his god damn pity!*
"Well you'll be glad to know your fever's down,"
*Break out the banners and lets all celebrate!*
"Commander Tucker's been into to see you quite a few times, you've had everybody worried."
*Liar*
"The Captain's asked to see you,"
*I feel so privileged; honestly this is my caring face. I mean I can hardly hold a nice conversation with the people I betrayed can I? *
"Do you feel up to seeing him now?"
*Whatever I say you're going to call him anyway so lets not beat about the bush here.*
Malcolm turned away.
"I'm here if you need to talk,"
*I....can't. Don't pretend to care-everybody must despise me for what I've done.
Why don't you just bog off and go play with your creatures of doom?*
Malcolm looked back at Phlox briefly before resuming staring at the ceiling.
Phlox crossed the room to the comm.
"Sickbay to Captain Archer."
"Archer here."
"He's woken up Captain, I'm afraid he's not very talkative though,"
"That's ok, thanks for letting me know. Archer out."
Malcolm sighed.
*What do I want?
Do I want everybody to forgive me?
Is this even Enterprise?
But am I letting down everybody by not talking? Or am I saving them by keeping silent?
Bloody hell, I'm confused.
I'm the bleedin' armoury officer and I'm confused.
It would be so much easier if I would just die.*
~*~Please review! I really wanna know what you think!~*~