Chapter Three! Splendiferous. I've been reading my own stories for hours
and that somehow inspired me. It also made me wonder how I have enough
creativity to write that many stories. Confusion.
Disclaimer: Well.. I've nothing creative to say about this. I don't own X- Men Evolution.
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"My plan is working perfectly!" Principal Kelly said evilly.
"No it isn't," Dr. Spunkerneller said.
"How so?" Kelly asked.
"You just gave two addicts sugar highs. Then you did nothing else." Spunkerneller flipped through his shrink notebook grinning at all his amusing doodles. –I should be a cartoonist- he thought.
"Well what would you suggest I do?"
"Well for one, stop seeing that Magneto fellow for lunch everyday. Second, I am their shrink, I could turn them against their fellow mutants through a means I shant reveal."
"Good idea, for the latter suggestion. Regarding the former: What?! How dare you accuse me of such a thing! I have lawyers! I'll sue you for degradation of character! I-"
"I have pictures." Spunkerneller said calmly.
"Oh. Well never mind then."
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At a candy store somewhere in downtown Bayville, people were running out the doors in an unrealistic number due to what was inside. What was inside? I shall tell you.. now. Pietro and Kurt were inside. That wouldn't seem so bad if they weren't extremely hyper, covered in what I pray was chocolate and destroying everything in their search for more candy.
"I LOVE GUMMY WORMS!" Pietro screamed and proceeded to shove fistful after fistful into his mouth at lightning speed. Kurt was pouring about thirty tubes of pixie stix into his mouth and miraculously not choking on the powder. Bob the Microsoft intern stood shakily for he had been nearly trampled to death by the two and then by the frightened humans.
"WHO ARE YOU?" Kurt asked.
"HE'S HERE TO STEAL OUR CANDY!" Pietro accused and Poor Bob was teleported out above a river. Certain their candy supply was now safe the two mutants continued to stuff their faces. Until, that is, Jean and Scott arrived.
"Kurt, please listen to me. You are high on sugar, we need to get you back to the institute." Jean said. Kurt took one look at her and screamed.
"GET AVAY SPACE LOBSTER!" and he ported himself and Pietro off to a magical candy kingdom. But not really.
"I told you that wouldn't work," Scott said.
"No you didn't, fool man!" Jean scolded.
"Yes ma'am!" Scott squeaked for he was thoroughly whipped.
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Dr. Spunkerneller spotted his two mutant patients and reviewed his plan quickly which he had drawn out with sidewalk chalk since Kelly had kicked him out of his office.
"This is, like, so evil!" he said giddily and then began to cackle manically until he realized Kurt and Pietro were almost out of sight, and the little girl from whom he had borrowed the chalk was giving him a dirty look, so he dropped the chalk and chased after them.
"Wow. Look at my hands; they're so tiny and girlish!" Pietro was saying as Spunkerneller walked up.
"Pietro, Kurt?" he said cautiously for they were surely volatile in this state. Plus Kurt's tail kinda, you know, freaked him out.
"Mommy?" Kurt said hopefully.
"No, it's Dr. Spunkerneller."
"Oh, mommy! I missed you!" Kurt proclaimed and gave the doctor a big I-love-you-mommy hug.
"Um, yes.. well Kurt, mommy has something she needs you to do." Spunkerneller said feeling slightly ridiculous. As ridiculous as Kurt thinking a fifty year old balding man was his mommy? Never!
"Vhat is it, mommy?" the blue mutant asked, his eyes shining with joy at being reunited with his mommy. Not Mystique, you fool! His pleasant German mommy.
"You know the X-Men?" Kurt nodded, "Well they are evil. They have been using your wonderful gift for their own evil plans."
"Gasp!" Kurt said instead of just making the noise. Could this be true? His friends were evil? Well if his mommy said so it must be true. He had always suspected that space lobster, though.
"I need you to take them all out, uh, sweetie. Think you can do that for your mommy?"
"Yes mommy! I vill do vhatever you say!" Kurt said, enthused.
"Good. Now run along," Spunkerneller said and began to cackle again. Kurt turned to Pietro.
"That's my mommy!" he said proudly.
"She must be really happy to see you. See how she laughs with joy?"
"Oh, yes. Now let's go beat the living crap out of the X-Men!"
"Okay!" Pietro cheered.
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Professor Xavier flipped through his Fashion Bug catalogue, trying to decide which of the spring line he would add to his ever growing collection of women's wear. This however proved to be far too complicated and he threw down the catalogue in frustration.
"Oh, I'll never get my new dress!" he said woefully. Darn! Suddenly his brain powers sensed Kurt was near. –Oh good, he's back from his sugar high. Now how shall I punish him in a way that will demean and traumatize him? - the secretly evil man thought evilly. Then he realized Quicksilver was with him and reached into their minds further. Apparently Kurt's mother had ordered him to destroy the X-Men. Huh, weird.
Xavier sighed: he really wasn't in the mood to stop a hostile takeover, so he locked the door to his room and made everyone in the mansion believe he wasn't there.
"Now, let's see if I can find some pumps that I like." Good luck professor! To the battlegrounds!
Bobby was sitting calmly in the living room when suddenly all of a sudden, Kurt BAMF'd in front of him.
"Yo, dog. What's good?" he asked.
"DIE SECRETLY EVIL FORMER COMRAD!" Kurt screeched and leapt at his face.
"Yo! I don't play that!" Bobby said angrily and attempted to ice the blue mutant. This attempt went unfinished however, for Pietro speeded into him, knocking Iceman into a wall and unconscious.
"Thank you new non-evil friend!" Kurt said and gave Pietro a friend- hug. Jamie walked in just as this happened and moaned.
"Oh come on! Are you serious? Why do these things keep happening to me!?" For as we all know he had already seen the professor in a dress and Principal Kelly having lunch with his male lover Magneto, and now this. Poor Jamie. So he called for help and all the other mutants arrived mere seconds after the embrace.
"NOOOOO!" he screamed which frightened the two crazed mutants and made them attack.
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Five minutes later both were bound and gagged and given a sedative and the Brotherhood was loading Pietro into Lance's jeep.
"That was insanely easy." Sam said.
"Yeah-huh. Hey when he wakes up you know what we should do?" Ray asked.
"What?" all the X-Men and New Recruits said in unison.
"Tie a sugar cube to the end of a stick and attach it too his head! I wanna see him run around like an idiot!" all the mutants laughed evilly.
"Yes, that would be funtacular!" said the professor who had just rolled up for some reason.
"My, we are, like, so secretly evil," Kitty said.
"And he hasn't a clue. The fool!" Storm laughed.
"I knew it!" Jamie cried.
"Knew what?" the professor asked innocently.
"That you're all evil!" the young mutant shouted.
"Dude, what are you talking about?" Bobby asked.
"But.. but.. I'm gonna take up drinking!" he shouted, and then stormed off.
"That was close, dog."
"Whew, yeah."
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BWAHAHAHAHA! Bet you weren't expecting that! Of course I wasn't either, the ending was just totally random. Hope you liked it! Review please!
Disclaimer: Well.. I've nothing creative to say about this. I don't own X- Men Evolution.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"My plan is working perfectly!" Principal Kelly said evilly.
"No it isn't," Dr. Spunkerneller said.
"How so?" Kelly asked.
"You just gave two addicts sugar highs. Then you did nothing else." Spunkerneller flipped through his shrink notebook grinning at all his amusing doodles. –I should be a cartoonist- he thought.
"Well what would you suggest I do?"
"Well for one, stop seeing that Magneto fellow for lunch everyday. Second, I am their shrink, I could turn them against their fellow mutants through a means I shant reveal."
"Good idea, for the latter suggestion. Regarding the former: What?! How dare you accuse me of such a thing! I have lawyers! I'll sue you for degradation of character! I-"
"I have pictures." Spunkerneller said calmly.
"Oh. Well never mind then."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
At a candy store somewhere in downtown Bayville, people were running out the doors in an unrealistic number due to what was inside. What was inside? I shall tell you.. now. Pietro and Kurt were inside. That wouldn't seem so bad if they weren't extremely hyper, covered in what I pray was chocolate and destroying everything in their search for more candy.
"I LOVE GUMMY WORMS!" Pietro screamed and proceeded to shove fistful after fistful into his mouth at lightning speed. Kurt was pouring about thirty tubes of pixie stix into his mouth and miraculously not choking on the powder. Bob the Microsoft intern stood shakily for he had been nearly trampled to death by the two and then by the frightened humans.
"WHO ARE YOU?" Kurt asked.
"HE'S HERE TO STEAL OUR CANDY!" Pietro accused and Poor Bob was teleported out above a river. Certain their candy supply was now safe the two mutants continued to stuff their faces. Until, that is, Jean and Scott arrived.
"Kurt, please listen to me. You are high on sugar, we need to get you back to the institute." Jean said. Kurt took one look at her and screamed.
"GET AVAY SPACE LOBSTER!" and he ported himself and Pietro off to a magical candy kingdom. But not really.
"I told you that wouldn't work," Scott said.
"No you didn't, fool man!" Jean scolded.
"Yes ma'am!" Scott squeaked for he was thoroughly whipped.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Dr. Spunkerneller spotted his two mutant patients and reviewed his plan quickly which he had drawn out with sidewalk chalk since Kelly had kicked him out of his office.
"This is, like, so evil!" he said giddily and then began to cackle manically until he realized Kurt and Pietro were almost out of sight, and the little girl from whom he had borrowed the chalk was giving him a dirty look, so he dropped the chalk and chased after them.
"Wow. Look at my hands; they're so tiny and girlish!" Pietro was saying as Spunkerneller walked up.
"Pietro, Kurt?" he said cautiously for they were surely volatile in this state. Plus Kurt's tail kinda, you know, freaked him out.
"Mommy?" Kurt said hopefully.
"No, it's Dr. Spunkerneller."
"Oh, mommy! I missed you!" Kurt proclaimed and gave the doctor a big I-love-you-mommy hug.
"Um, yes.. well Kurt, mommy has something she needs you to do." Spunkerneller said feeling slightly ridiculous. As ridiculous as Kurt thinking a fifty year old balding man was his mommy? Never!
"Vhat is it, mommy?" the blue mutant asked, his eyes shining with joy at being reunited with his mommy. Not Mystique, you fool! His pleasant German mommy.
"You know the X-Men?" Kurt nodded, "Well they are evil. They have been using your wonderful gift for their own evil plans."
"Gasp!" Kurt said instead of just making the noise. Could this be true? His friends were evil? Well if his mommy said so it must be true. He had always suspected that space lobster, though.
"I need you to take them all out, uh, sweetie. Think you can do that for your mommy?"
"Yes mommy! I vill do vhatever you say!" Kurt said, enthused.
"Good. Now run along," Spunkerneller said and began to cackle again. Kurt turned to Pietro.
"That's my mommy!" he said proudly.
"She must be really happy to see you. See how she laughs with joy?"
"Oh, yes. Now let's go beat the living crap out of the X-Men!"
"Okay!" Pietro cheered.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Professor Xavier flipped through his Fashion Bug catalogue, trying to decide which of the spring line he would add to his ever growing collection of women's wear. This however proved to be far too complicated and he threw down the catalogue in frustration.
"Oh, I'll never get my new dress!" he said woefully. Darn! Suddenly his brain powers sensed Kurt was near. –Oh good, he's back from his sugar high. Now how shall I punish him in a way that will demean and traumatize him? - the secretly evil man thought evilly. Then he realized Quicksilver was with him and reached into their minds further. Apparently Kurt's mother had ordered him to destroy the X-Men. Huh, weird.
Xavier sighed: he really wasn't in the mood to stop a hostile takeover, so he locked the door to his room and made everyone in the mansion believe he wasn't there.
"Now, let's see if I can find some pumps that I like." Good luck professor! To the battlegrounds!
Bobby was sitting calmly in the living room when suddenly all of a sudden, Kurt BAMF'd in front of him.
"Yo, dog. What's good?" he asked.
"DIE SECRETLY EVIL FORMER COMRAD!" Kurt screeched and leapt at his face.
"Yo! I don't play that!" Bobby said angrily and attempted to ice the blue mutant. This attempt went unfinished however, for Pietro speeded into him, knocking Iceman into a wall and unconscious.
"Thank you new non-evil friend!" Kurt said and gave Pietro a friend- hug. Jamie walked in just as this happened and moaned.
"Oh come on! Are you serious? Why do these things keep happening to me!?" For as we all know he had already seen the professor in a dress and Principal Kelly having lunch with his male lover Magneto, and now this. Poor Jamie. So he called for help and all the other mutants arrived mere seconds after the embrace.
"NOOOOO!" he screamed which frightened the two crazed mutants and made them attack.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Five minutes later both were bound and gagged and given a sedative and the Brotherhood was loading Pietro into Lance's jeep.
"That was insanely easy." Sam said.
"Yeah-huh. Hey when he wakes up you know what we should do?" Ray asked.
"What?" all the X-Men and New Recruits said in unison.
"Tie a sugar cube to the end of a stick and attach it too his head! I wanna see him run around like an idiot!" all the mutants laughed evilly.
"Yes, that would be funtacular!" said the professor who had just rolled up for some reason.
"My, we are, like, so secretly evil," Kitty said.
"And he hasn't a clue. The fool!" Storm laughed.
"I knew it!" Jamie cried.
"Knew what?" the professor asked innocently.
"That you're all evil!" the young mutant shouted.
"Dude, what are you talking about?" Bobby asked.
"But.. but.. I'm gonna take up drinking!" he shouted, and then stormed off.
"That was close, dog."
"Whew, yeah."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
BWAHAHAHAHA! Bet you weren't expecting that! Of course I wasn't either, the ending was just totally random. Hope you liked it! Review please!