OK, first and original ending! I thought I'd write this one first and THEN let you guys read the happy one ^_^ just to make you feel better. Just be glad there IS a happy one because you know, until someone convinced me I was going to leave it all death, destruction etc. etc. So anyway, here we go, first ending, please go on and review the next ending after this one!
Can you believe we're almost at the end?
About Van flying out of the cave, I never thought of that! Wow! Cool! Anyway, also about my grammar, I've never been very good at this sort of thing ;_; please forgive me! I always thought I used too many commas! I'll try to do better!
Hope I can write this chapter ok for you all! Thanks for reading this so far, I love you guys, this is my most reviewed story...ever! Wow, thank you so much! We've been going for a few months now haven't we? Please support me to the end!
Anyway I also completely have lost track of whether it is day or night in Gaea and Fanelia now so bare with me! I'm just gonna guess :P
PLEASE READ BOTH ENDINGS!
Disclaimer: I don't own any Escaflowne characters but the characters created by me, for example, the maids and the black faceless people things are my invention. Lyrics of Yubiwa translated by Takayama Miyuki and found on animelyrics.com but I've used them in conversation so you might not be able to locate them. Also used the translated lyrics of 'kuuki to hoshi' again! Thanks to all you wonderful translators of animelyrics.com you've made my life wonderful ^__^
* * *
"Is it done?" Van asked again, his stomach turning over, he looked at the group expectantly
No one said anything. He looked at each of them, confused, to find only Allen returned his glance. Van suddenly felt his stomach drop out of his body and a roaring begin to fill his ears.
"My Lord" the midwife said slowly, she looked ashen "I'm afraid, things didn't quite go as planned" she gripped her hands and looked at the floor
"What does that mean?" Mamoru gripped Allen's shirt "Hitomi's alright isn't she?"
Allen didn't reply.
"There was a problem with the birth my Lord" the midwife continued softly "The wings you see, made it awkward to remove the baby and..." she stopped and took a breath "There was a choice that had to be made and quickly. Lady Hitomi made it..." she stopped and looked up at her King
Van swallowed "The baby is alive isn't it?" he asked fearfully
The woman nodded and then her composure began to drop as she got out "You have a healthy baby girl my Lord, but the lady gave herself for it" a sob escaped her throat, cutting the silence in the room like a knife
Van's stomach revolted and the roaring in his ears covered all sounds but the words "...won't survive the night" he collapsed into the chair he had slept in and tried to take it in, his breathing laboured and harsh
Mamoru collapsed onto Allen's arm, the Knight allowing the boy who looked smaller than ever to wrap his arms around him and sob into his blue jacket. Allen himself stared ahead, grey, his jaws clenched together.
The midwife left, unable to hold herself together.
Van could feel nothing, his feet numb but somehow he stood up again, pushing against the nearby table.
He looked at Mamoru "Don't cry" he said softly
Mamoru heard nothing, grief swallowing him whole and drowning him in tears, his only sister in the world was being dragged away from him.
Van faced the door to his chamber as if going through it would mean it was true, she was dying. Going through would confirm. He looked at Allen, the Knight saw nothing, only the wall in front of him and his thoughts.
Van took a few deep breaths and put his hand on the door handle, pushing it gently. Merle nearly ran like a cannonball into him on her way out, flooded with tears, blindly escaping the atmosphere of death that was beginning to fall on the room that had been supposed to bring new life into the world. He let her go.
He shut the door behind him and looked around him, the midwife had drawn the curtains and sticks on candles were dotted around everywhere. Van stared at the floor, he just couldn't look at her. Not yet.
Instead he looked up and traced the grains of wood along the floor slowly, up to where the bottom of the bed was, then up the boards to the blanket. Then he swept his eyes up the bed to where she was.
Hitomi was propped up in the bed, holding a small bundle of blankets to her, her eyes were close and she looked pale and clammy.
Yet she'd never looked more beautiful to Van; a mother with her newborn child's glow would never fail to knock him off his feet.
Noticing someone in the room Hitomi propped a heavy eyelid open and looked at him across the room. She said nothing but smiled a small smile and motioned for him to come forward. He did so and stopped next to her, sitting on the edge of the bed, she passed the bundle to him.
Van looked down into the most perfect face he had ever encountered in all his years. A small, perfectly proportioned being was sleeping quietly, a small snuffling the only indication this tiny child was something more than a doll. His daughter. HIS daughter. She was so beautiful.
"What shall we call her?" a croak brought him back to reality
He looked at Hitomi, smiling earnestly through her tired eyes, trying to put the best face on. For him it was worse than seeing her sickly and weeping. Van bit his lip to stop a sob rising. He couldn't appear weak to her, no, never to her, he was her rock.
He managed a watery smile and said "Mekenna"
Hitomi frowned "Mekenna?" testing the strange words on her tongue "What does it mean?"
"She's the heroine of a folk tale, a girl who fights off a dragon and becomes a hero" Van smiled bitterly, feeling finally a lone tear slid down his cheek, he scrubbed at it violently "Why did you do it?"
Hitomi looked away and whispered, "When you gave me a smile as we parted, it was your message for me to truly live with all my heart" she looked at him, her lip shaking "This is what I call living with my heart" she reached up to wipe another tear away from Van's cheeks as he tried to keep a stony exterior "Giving myself for our child, I can't imagine living for anything more and since I caused all the trouble in the first place..."
Van shrugged off her hand and stared at her "What about me?"
Hitomi sighed, she was collapsed against the pillows, gasping lightly, exhausted. Van didn't care, he had to know why she was leaving him.
"I've lived for you Van every single second of my life, even before I knew you I was giving everything for you. I just didn't realise it before I met you" she looked at him and then at Mekenna in his arms "She will give you more happiness than I ever could" Hitomi bit her lip "She is everything I ever wanted you to have in that small bundle. Mekenna is my gift to you Van"
Van didn't feel better, he put Mekenna gently into a small cradle placed near the bed and climbed up onto the bed. He looked into Hitomi's eyes earnestly before kissing her fiercely on the lips.
Hitomi let him before pushing him away gently, he was crying.
"I don't want it, I want you" Van protested softly, his voice cracking as his eyes leaked
Hitomi sobbed out "You can't have everything you want"
He wrapped his arms around her, surprised at how weak she was that she couldn't do anything to stop him, she was fading away.
"Please don't leave me" he cried "Not now, not after we have each other again, don't leave me"
Hitomi blinked and wrapped her arms around him too, drawing him down into an embrace on the bed, she still had a bit of time left to cradle him, and she wasn't going to waste it.
"Van" she whispered softly into his ear, "I'm scared, I know this is the right thing to do but I'm terrified"
Van blinked and got into a more comfortable position on the bed, sitting on top of the covers and holding her in an easier way before replying, "I'm not going anywhere"
Hitomi took a short breath and whispered, "You'll tell her about me won't you?"
Van blinked and replied "Of course. I'll tell her everything" he felt himself bite the inside of his cheek
Hitomi didn't mind crying, her eyes were red and puffy now "I don't mind if you marry someone else"
Van started and said firmly "I'm not ever going to marry someone else" he pulled off the pendant from his neck and slid the ring off, placing it firmly on her finger "Never"
Hitomi smiled weakly and replied, "It's ok Van...I...don't mind, really. You're so young and it'd be...such a shame..." she felt tired "And you might fall in love, marry a Queen, and have a proper heir to the Kingdom" she paused "I'm not really Queen material"
"You'd be a wonderful Queen" Van pressed, gripping her hand tightly and smelling her hair under his chin as much as he could, trying to imprint the fragrance and the feel of her in his arms onto his memory
"But as long as you remember me" Hitomi whispered "I just want you to be...happy...and our baby is so beautiful" she leant into him more closely and said "I wonder what Mamoru will do, tell him I don't mind if he marries Merle"
Van frowned "You're going to see Mamoru, you can tell him yourself"
Hitomi smiled weakly and said, "I love him so much, and my family, I love them all..."
They sat in silence, both sniffing and trying to remember every detail about the other firmly in their heads. Mekenna made no sound and they forgot she was there, too wrapped up in themselves and their sorrow to remember...
"Van" Hitomi whispered after a while
"Yes?"
"Where will I go?"
"Go?"
"When I...die. Is there anywhere?"
"Of course" Van replied "You'll go to the most beautiful field of flowers imaginable"
"Really?"
"Yes"
Hitomi's voice was nothing more than a murmur "Tell me about it"
Van thought for a moment and said "Well, it's always summer. But not the really hot summers, it's a perfect day so you can walk around barefoot in summer clothes without burning or feeling too hot. And there's a light breeze that blows the flowers in the field in waves, like multicoloured water" he felt awful, his heart felt as if it was being wrenched away with wherever she was going "Everyone is there, you'll see your grandparents and great-grandparents and everyone goes there..."
He must have talked for hours, he thought up every thing lovely and beautiful he could think of and threw it all together in a mixture of what he knew would be there for her. It had to be there, heaven was everything good in one place. No one was scared or hurt or sad, it was perfect.
"Will you go there?"
Her voice was like the breath of wind that knocks the final autumn leaf off the branch before winter.
Van swallowed "I'll go there, I'll come to you one day Hitomi"
He knew she couldn't hear him anymore, but he didn't move.
He held on to her gently as his eyes leaked and he ran the story of heaven through his head again and again as he felt her go cold in his arms. The woman he loved had gone from his reach forever. He'd never see her again...
In the middle of his grieving a siren sounded out.
Carefully extracting himself from his love's arms he climbed off the bed to discover Mekenna screaming in the cradle, as if she too were mourning. Van wiped his eyes but couldn't help a sob that choked him. He walked around to the cradle and picked up the small baby.
She was wrinkled and red, hardly a royal Princess. He inspected the bundle and pulled out a feather from the bottom of the blanket. The baby stopped yelling so loudly and looked in a dazed way at her father. So it had been hurting her.
Van looked at her and wiped his eyes again.
Her gift to him...
"Well" he said quietly "I guess it's just you and me now" he turned around and looked at his bed, she only looked as if she was sleeping
Van felt his gut wrench and he turned away, he had to tell the others. But not just yet. Pulling a chair up to the bed he sat down and held the baby, rocking her slowly, and humming the song that Hitomi had sung only a day or so ago, remembering her every move and realising, this baby needed him now.
The gift of life that Hitomi had given him was to keep him from taking his own, had she done it on purpose? He would never know, but he did know one thing; he would never, ever stop loving her.
"Yes" he told the baby firmly "I'm going to go to her, not now. You need me"
He looked at the bed again.
"But one day"
* * *
An undescribable world, a blue and clear light
Everything is delicate like glitter and
What is truly precious
Is unrecognized by anyone and
Is small if taken in the hand and
Is lost and then fades away
Why is it so
If within this expanse
It is the more beautiful things that break most easily
Rescue me
If you are to change into a spirit
Take me away with you
I don sorrow
Like feathers and am sent flying away
Air and stars
To a land so pure and unknown to anyone
Where only such fleeting things gather
* * *
Can you believe we're almost at the end?
About Van flying out of the cave, I never thought of that! Wow! Cool! Anyway, also about my grammar, I've never been very good at this sort of thing ;_; please forgive me! I always thought I used too many commas! I'll try to do better!
Hope I can write this chapter ok for you all! Thanks for reading this so far, I love you guys, this is my most reviewed story...ever! Wow, thank you so much! We've been going for a few months now haven't we? Please support me to the end!
Anyway I also completely have lost track of whether it is day or night in Gaea and Fanelia now so bare with me! I'm just gonna guess :P
PLEASE READ BOTH ENDINGS!
Disclaimer: I don't own any Escaflowne characters but the characters created by me, for example, the maids and the black faceless people things are my invention. Lyrics of Yubiwa translated by Takayama Miyuki and found on animelyrics.com but I've used them in conversation so you might not be able to locate them. Also used the translated lyrics of 'kuuki to hoshi' again! Thanks to all you wonderful translators of animelyrics.com you've made my life wonderful ^__^
* * *
"Is it done?" Van asked again, his stomach turning over, he looked at the group expectantly
No one said anything. He looked at each of them, confused, to find only Allen returned his glance. Van suddenly felt his stomach drop out of his body and a roaring begin to fill his ears.
"My Lord" the midwife said slowly, she looked ashen "I'm afraid, things didn't quite go as planned" she gripped her hands and looked at the floor
"What does that mean?" Mamoru gripped Allen's shirt "Hitomi's alright isn't she?"
Allen didn't reply.
"There was a problem with the birth my Lord" the midwife continued softly "The wings you see, made it awkward to remove the baby and..." she stopped and took a breath "There was a choice that had to be made and quickly. Lady Hitomi made it..." she stopped and looked up at her King
Van swallowed "The baby is alive isn't it?" he asked fearfully
The woman nodded and then her composure began to drop as she got out "You have a healthy baby girl my Lord, but the lady gave herself for it" a sob escaped her throat, cutting the silence in the room like a knife
Van's stomach revolted and the roaring in his ears covered all sounds but the words "...won't survive the night" he collapsed into the chair he had slept in and tried to take it in, his breathing laboured and harsh
Mamoru collapsed onto Allen's arm, the Knight allowing the boy who looked smaller than ever to wrap his arms around him and sob into his blue jacket. Allen himself stared ahead, grey, his jaws clenched together.
The midwife left, unable to hold herself together.
Van could feel nothing, his feet numb but somehow he stood up again, pushing against the nearby table.
He looked at Mamoru "Don't cry" he said softly
Mamoru heard nothing, grief swallowing him whole and drowning him in tears, his only sister in the world was being dragged away from him.
Van faced the door to his chamber as if going through it would mean it was true, she was dying. Going through would confirm. He looked at Allen, the Knight saw nothing, only the wall in front of him and his thoughts.
Van took a few deep breaths and put his hand on the door handle, pushing it gently. Merle nearly ran like a cannonball into him on her way out, flooded with tears, blindly escaping the atmosphere of death that was beginning to fall on the room that had been supposed to bring new life into the world. He let her go.
He shut the door behind him and looked around him, the midwife had drawn the curtains and sticks on candles were dotted around everywhere. Van stared at the floor, he just couldn't look at her. Not yet.
Instead he looked up and traced the grains of wood along the floor slowly, up to where the bottom of the bed was, then up the boards to the blanket. Then he swept his eyes up the bed to where she was.
Hitomi was propped up in the bed, holding a small bundle of blankets to her, her eyes were close and she looked pale and clammy.
Yet she'd never looked more beautiful to Van; a mother with her newborn child's glow would never fail to knock him off his feet.
Noticing someone in the room Hitomi propped a heavy eyelid open and looked at him across the room. She said nothing but smiled a small smile and motioned for him to come forward. He did so and stopped next to her, sitting on the edge of the bed, she passed the bundle to him.
Van looked down into the most perfect face he had ever encountered in all his years. A small, perfectly proportioned being was sleeping quietly, a small snuffling the only indication this tiny child was something more than a doll. His daughter. HIS daughter. She was so beautiful.
"What shall we call her?" a croak brought him back to reality
He looked at Hitomi, smiling earnestly through her tired eyes, trying to put the best face on. For him it was worse than seeing her sickly and weeping. Van bit his lip to stop a sob rising. He couldn't appear weak to her, no, never to her, he was her rock.
He managed a watery smile and said "Mekenna"
Hitomi frowned "Mekenna?" testing the strange words on her tongue "What does it mean?"
"She's the heroine of a folk tale, a girl who fights off a dragon and becomes a hero" Van smiled bitterly, feeling finally a lone tear slid down his cheek, he scrubbed at it violently "Why did you do it?"
Hitomi looked away and whispered, "When you gave me a smile as we parted, it was your message for me to truly live with all my heart" she looked at him, her lip shaking "This is what I call living with my heart" she reached up to wipe another tear away from Van's cheeks as he tried to keep a stony exterior "Giving myself for our child, I can't imagine living for anything more and since I caused all the trouble in the first place..."
Van shrugged off her hand and stared at her "What about me?"
Hitomi sighed, she was collapsed against the pillows, gasping lightly, exhausted. Van didn't care, he had to know why she was leaving him.
"I've lived for you Van every single second of my life, even before I knew you I was giving everything for you. I just didn't realise it before I met you" she looked at him and then at Mekenna in his arms "She will give you more happiness than I ever could" Hitomi bit her lip "She is everything I ever wanted you to have in that small bundle. Mekenna is my gift to you Van"
Van didn't feel better, he put Mekenna gently into a small cradle placed near the bed and climbed up onto the bed. He looked into Hitomi's eyes earnestly before kissing her fiercely on the lips.
Hitomi let him before pushing him away gently, he was crying.
"I don't want it, I want you" Van protested softly, his voice cracking as his eyes leaked
Hitomi sobbed out "You can't have everything you want"
He wrapped his arms around her, surprised at how weak she was that she couldn't do anything to stop him, she was fading away.
"Please don't leave me" he cried "Not now, not after we have each other again, don't leave me"
Hitomi blinked and wrapped her arms around him too, drawing him down into an embrace on the bed, she still had a bit of time left to cradle him, and she wasn't going to waste it.
"Van" she whispered softly into his ear, "I'm scared, I know this is the right thing to do but I'm terrified"
Van blinked and got into a more comfortable position on the bed, sitting on top of the covers and holding her in an easier way before replying, "I'm not going anywhere"
Hitomi took a short breath and whispered, "You'll tell her about me won't you?"
Van blinked and replied "Of course. I'll tell her everything" he felt himself bite the inside of his cheek
Hitomi didn't mind crying, her eyes were red and puffy now "I don't mind if you marry someone else"
Van started and said firmly "I'm not ever going to marry someone else" he pulled off the pendant from his neck and slid the ring off, placing it firmly on her finger "Never"
Hitomi smiled weakly and replied, "It's ok Van...I...don't mind, really. You're so young and it'd be...such a shame..." she felt tired "And you might fall in love, marry a Queen, and have a proper heir to the Kingdom" she paused "I'm not really Queen material"
"You'd be a wonderful Queen" Van pressed, gripping her hand tightly and smelling her hair under his chin as much as he could, trying to imprint the fragrance and the feel of her in his arms onto his memory
"But as long as you remember me" Hitomi whispered "I just want you to be...happy...and our baby is so beautiful" she leant into him more closely and said "I wonder what Mamoru will do, tell him I don't mind if he marries Merle"
Van frowned "You're going to see Mamoru, you can tell him yourself"
Hitomi smiled weakly and said, "I love him so much, and my family, I love them all..."
They sat in silence, both sniffing and trying to remember every detail about the other firmly in their heads. Mekenna made no sound and they forgot she was there, too wrapped up in themselves and their sorrow to remember...
"Van" Hitomi whispered after a while
"Yes?"
"Where will I go?"
"Go?"
"When I...die. Is there anywhere?"
"Of course" Van replied "You'll go to the most beautiful field of flowers imaginable"
"Really?"
"Yes"
Hitomi's voice was nothing more than a murmur "Tell me about it"
Van thought for a moment and said "Well, it's always summer. But not the really hot summers, it's a perfect day so you can walk around barefoot in summer clothes without burning or feeling too hot. And there's a light breeze that blows the flowers in the field in waves, like multicoloured water" he felt awful, his heart felt as if it was being wrenched away with wherever she was going "Everyone is there, you'll see your grandparents and great-grandparents and everyone goes there..."
He must have talked for hours, he thought up every thing lovely and beautiful he could think of and threw it all together in a mixture of what he knew would be there for her. It had to be there, heaven was everything good in one place. No one was scared or hurt or sad, it was perfect.
"Will you go there?"
Her voice was like the breath of wind that knocks the final autumn leaf off the branch before winter.
Van swallowed "I'll go there, I'll come to you one day Hitomi"
He knew she couldn't hear him anymore, but he didn't move.
He held on to her gently as his eyes leaked and he ran the story of heaven through his head again and again as he felt her go cold in his arms. The woman he loved had gone from his reach forever. He'd never see her again...
In the middle of his grieving a siren sounded out.
Carefully extracting himself from his love's arms he climbed off the bed to discover Mekenna screaming in the cradle, as if she too were mourning. Van wiped his eyes but couldn't help a sob that choked him. He walked around to the cradle and picked up the small baby.
She was wrinkled and red, hardly a royal Princess. He inspected the bundle and pulled out a feather from the bottom of the blanket. The baby stopped yelling so loudly and looked in a dazed way at her father. So it had been hurting her.
Van looked at her and wiped his eyes again.
Her gift to him...
"Well" he said quietly "I guess it's just you and me now" he turned around and looked at his bed, she only looked as if she was sleeping
Van felt his gut wrench and he turned away, he had to tell the others. But not just yet. Pulling a chair up to the bed he sat down and held the baby, rocking her slowly, and humming the song that Hitomi had sung only a day or so ago, remembering her every move and realising, this baby needed him now.
The gift of life that Hitomi had given him was to keep him from taking his own, had she done it on purpose? He would never know, but he did know one thing; he would never, ever stop loving her.
"Yes" he told the baby firmly "I'm going to go to her, not now. You need me"
He looked at the bed again.
"But one day"
* * *
An undescribable world, a blue and clear light
Everything is delicate like glitter and
What is truly precious
Is unrecognized by anyone and
Is small if taken in the hand and
Is lost and then fades away
Why is it so
If within this expanse
It is the more beautiful things that break most easily
Rescue me
If you are to change into a spirit
Take me away with you
I don sorrow
Like feathers and am sent flying away
Air and stars
To a land so pure and unknown to anyone
Where only such fleeting things gather
* * *