Chapter 19: For He's A Jolly Good Fellow, And So Say None Of Us
(A/N: I find it fascinating, the way these stories grow stranger every time)
Lucius Malfoy, Severus Snape, and Remus Lupin were sitting in the most exclusive restaurant in Knockturn Alley. They were all wearing evil-looking party hats, and expressions of smugness (in Lucius' case), embarrassment (that was Snape), and utter despair (Lupin).
"Happy birthday, Severus!" Lucius proclaimed, raising his glass of suspiciously blood-like wine. He nudged Lupin, who also mumbled "Happy birthday" in a less than happy voice. "Wasn't it generous of Remus to offer you this lovely dinner for your birthday?" Lucius said to Snape. He grinned at Lupin, whom he had forced to pay for this meal (he could, since Lupin was his property) and who, in reply, muttered something about not being able to pay the rent nor any food for two months, which Lucius ignored.
"Of course, you'll be getting MY present tomorrow, when it's really your birthday," Lucius said to Snape, who was gazing at Lupin with distrust. "A toast! To the one and only Severus Snape!" Lucius said, and they all had a sip of their wine, before progressing to their food.
Lupin, who hadn't had anything to eat except two chocolate frogs the last three days, immediately grabbed his meat of undisclosed origin with both hands, and proceeded to rip it apart with his teeth in a rather wolf-like fashion. Lucius gave him a meaningful glare and annoyed snort, and Snape rolled his eyes and sighed, but Lupin ignored them and continued to eat.
Lucius snorted again, and Snape sighed, but to no avail. A few bits of meat had now landed in Lupin's hair.
Lucius snorted a loud reproachful snort, and Snape gave a very annoyed sigh, but Lupin only attacked his food with renewed enthusiasm.
Lucius took a very deep breath and snorted a very long, angry snort, that made several of the people on nearby tables turn around and look. Snape rolled his eyes extra hard and sighed very violently.
Lupin paused for a moment and looked up at them both. Lucius was gasping and snorting repeatedly, and Snape kept sighing deeply. He gulped, and resisted the urge to have a look at what was going on under the table. He knew they were supposedly best friends, but not THIS good. And in public, too. Feeling slightly embarrassed, he tore a long strip of flesh from his leg of whatever it was, and chewed it for a while.
Lucius assumed a look of utmost disgust at this, snorted a last time, and stood up. "This is unbearable," he said, and walked away, shaking his head in disbelief.
"Well done, Lupin," Snape snarled at Lupin, throwing down his napkin and shoving his plate aside in exasperation, and he stared moodily at his glass of wine, before downing it in one go.
Lupin looked up at him guiltily. Then he pointed at the barely touched, dodgy looking mass on Snape's plate, and said: "Are you going to finish that?"
(A/N: I find it fascinating, the way these stories grow stranger every time)
Lucius Malfoy, Severus Snape, and Remus Lupin were sitting in the most exclusive restaurant in Knockturn Alley. They were all wearing evil-looking party hats, and expressions of smugness (in Lucius' case), embarrassment (that was Snape), and utter despair (Lupin).
"Happy birthday, Severus!" Lucius proclaimed, raising his glass of suspiciously blood-like wine. He nudged Lupin, who also mumbled "Happy birthday" in a less than happy voice. "Wasn't it generous of Remus to offer you this lovely dinner for your birthday?" Lucius said to Snape. He grinned at Lupin, whom he had forced to pay for this meal (he could, since Lupin was his property) and who, in reply, muttered something about not being able to pay the rent nor any food for two months, which Lucius ignored.
"Of course, you'll be getting MY present tomorrow, when it's really your birthday," Lucius said to Snape, who was gazing at Lupin with distrust. "A toast! To the one and only Severus Snape!" Lucius said, and they all had a sip of their wine, before progressing to their food.
Lupin, who hadn't had anything to eat except two chocolate frogs the last three days, immediately grabbed his meat of undisclosed origin with both hands, and proceeded to rip it apart with his teeth in a rather wolf-like fashion. Lucius gave him a meaningful glare and annoyed snort, and Snape rolled his eyes and sighed, but Lupin ignored them and continued to eat.
Lucius snorted again, and Snape sighed, but to no avail. A few bits of meat had now landed in Lupin's hair.
Lucius snorted a loud reproachful snort, and Snape gave a very annoyed sigh, but Lupin only attacked his food with renewed enthusiasm.
Lucius took a very deep breath and snorted a very long, angry snort, that made several of the people on nearby tables turn around and look. Snape rolled his eyes extra hard and sighed very violently.
Lupin paused for a moment and looked up at them both. Lucius was gasping and snorting repeatedly, and Snape kept sighing deeply. He gulped, and resisted the urge to have a look at what was going on under the table. He knew they were supposedly best friends, but not THIS good. And in public, too. Feeling slightly embarrassed, he tore a long strip of flesh from his leg of whatever it was, and chewed it for a while.
Lucius assumed a look of utmost disgust at this, snorted a last time, and stood up. "This is unbearable," he said, and walked away, shaking his head in disbelief.
"Well done, Lupin," Snape snarled at Lupin, throwing down his napkin and shoving his plate aside in exasperation, and he stared moodily at his glass of wine, before downing it in one go.
Lupin looked up at him guiltily. Then he pointed at the barely touched, dodgy looking mass on Snape's plate, and said: "Are you going to finish that?"