Title: Strong Enough Chapter 3
Author: Nicki C.
Email: Nimacu@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: I don't own Once and Again or the characters
Summery: Grace's ramblings and feelings
Feedback: Of Course I want it.
(Grace has just exited Booklovers after Her conversation with Eli in Chapter 2)
"Well that went just wonderfully," Grace, thought to herself as she got in the car to head home. She spent all that time this morning on her hair and make-up and clothes and he'd totally shut her out. She knew dressing up was manipulative but she just wanted him to…. She didn't know what she wanted. Wasn't she the one who decided that she couldn't be Eli? Yet she knew she was acting like a girl who definitely wanted to be with him. Ugh and the comment out about wanting to clear the air, where had that come from, she was definitely reading too many romance novels. Why couldn't she have just said "Eli get down off that ladder, I'm madly in love with you" Of course she couldn't though she was Grace Manning, Queen of Inappropriate speeches and part of her wasn't sure she wanted him to know, but she should have said something less Grace and more Mae West. It was just that when she got nervous, she started talking like her mother. "My mother! Oh my goodness, I'm too young to be having that thought"
She kept traveling in the same pattern she'd criticize how she acted then she'd rehash the whole Eli just isn't what I need thing. Then she'd go off into thinking about how much she loved him, and if she could really have him she'd be happy living whatever lifestyle he choose weather as a honest blue collar worker or as a traveling stoned musician. But if she was really willing to do anything to be with him, why'd she run away? Because she couldn't deal with the fact that there was a good chance Eli wasn't going to change, that she end up married to a man (if he would even marry her) who cheated and lied and was content living in their parents garage and being a box boy. But…if Eli could change if Eli wanted to change, (and in some of their late night talks he talked about straightening out his life) everything would be different. She needed him to show her he wanted to change. But who was she to demand changes? They were barely friends anymore. A surefire way to ruin a relationship with Eli Sammler was to try and change him (look how badly he gets along with his parents). She couldn't be with him to change him, that wasn't fair to either of them…
Her mind just traveled around and around these thoughts as she drove home…
What was she going to do?
Meanwhile back in Booklovers…