Chapter 3 – Wherein Naruto asks Kakashi for advice
Kakashi had just found a nice tree to read beneath. The sun was shining, the birds were making little bird noises, and since he had summarily failed his latest group of genin, there was nothing he needed to get done for the next several days at least. All was right with the world. "Kakashi sensei.... Ummm... Kakashi sensei..." Kakashi looked up from his novel with a start. "Naruto-kun!" He said, "What an unexpected surprise. What are you doing here?"
"Actually," the blond hair boy blurted out embarrassedly, "I kind of need your advice."
"What is it?"
"Ummm..." he said, bending forward and lowering his voice to a whisper, "It's kind of personal."
Under his mask, Kakashi seemed to smile compassionately. "There, there," he said, patting the moss beside him. "Sit down and tell your Uncle Kakashi all about it."
Hurriedly Naruto slid to the ground. "Thanks." He said. "It's just that... this is the kind of thing I don't think I can really say to Iruka sensei. And telling the Pervert Sennin..." he shuddered and looked at Kakashi dubiously. "That pretty much leaves you."
Kakashi bent forward. "What is it?"
"Ok... what if... two of your oldest friends suddenly told you they were dating."
Kakashi leaned back against the trunk, disappointed. "That's it?"
"No!" Naruto snapped. "That's not it!"
"Ok, then, go on."
"Ok. So, what if, after you found out these friends were dating, they asked you too..."
"What?"
"do something romantic with them."
Kakashi almost chocked on his mask. "What kind of something romantic?" He asked.
"I don't know! I left before I had a chance to find out!"
Kakashi stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Must be a threesome," he decided.
Naruto buried his head in his hands and groaned.
"But who would want to have a threesome with you?" Kakashi asked.
Naruto only groaned again. "Let me try and guess," Kakashi said helpfully. He thought for a moment. "Sasuke and Sakura?" He didn't really think the two of them were going out, and the idea of Sakura even considering, much less agreeing to a threesome with Naruto seemed far fetched, but then no one else was coming to mind. Besides, Kakashi wasn't blind. He had seen the way Sasuke had been watching Naruto for a long time... somehow, he considered, he must have talked Sakura into it. Maybe the pink-haired girl had a hidden kinky side. Mentally, he weighed the options.
Naruto blushed. "No. Sasuke..." he said "... and Hinata,"
"Hyuuga Hinata?" Kakashi said. The blond nodded furiously.
"That," Kakashi said, "Is something I never thought of. It's always the quiet ones, isn't it?"
Naruto looked blank.
"Ok," Kakashi said. "So may I assume from your reaction to all this that you're not interested?"
Naruto turned an even deeper shade of red. "No!" He yelled. "I mean, how freaky would that be?" He buried his head even lower. "There's another problem too."
"Hmm?"
"I was sort of interested ... well, not anymore. But, before the whole them-becoming-a-couple thing..." he stopped. "You like Sasuke?" Kakashi asked. Naruto glared at him.
"You like Hinata?"
Naruto sighed. "I like neither," he said defensively. "Forget I even
tried to talk to you."
"Now, now," Kakashi said. "Don't say that. I have great experience
with romantic entanglements. Let me think about it." He closed his
eye meditatively. Naruto waited, expectant.
"Nope," Kakashi said, cheerfully, "Nothing. I need more time. I'll think about it and get back to you, ok?"
Naruto sighed.
Sasuke and Hinata glared at each other. They had left Naruto's home, and all Sasuke wanted to do was head back to his apartment and then train until he fell down dead. Apparently, Hinata had the same idea. Unfortunately, the Hyuuga and the Uchiha estates were in the same part of town.
He had been watching Hinata for some time – it was clear she had something she wanted to say to him, and that she had been building up the courage to say it for some time. Finally she spoke.
"Sasuke-kun," she said.
Oh damn, Sasuke thought. He had been hoping the road would split before she got up the nerve.
"It looks like Naruto-kun doesn't like either of us, does it?" She asked quietly.
He didn't think that required a reply.
"Are you... uh... going to give up?"
He looked at her. "No. Are you?"
"No." She said, surprisingly firm.
They walked a while longer.
"What's the next step?" She asked, hesitantly.
Sasuke turned to her with a confident smirk. "What's your next step? I have no idea." They had finally reached the corner where the road split. "From here on out, you're on your own."
So Sasuke said, but actually he had no idea what to do, either. Confessing, he had thought, would be the hard part, but given Naruto's reaction to his confession he wondered if he would even be able to salvage a fraction of their former friendship. Why had Naruto freaked out so much, anyway? Presumably it was because Sasuke was a guy, and Naruto couldn't handle having a guy like him. But Naruto had always seemed pretty tolerant of homosexuality in the past – maybe, Sasuke thought with a surge of irrational hope, Naruto freaked out because Sasuke's confession was hitting a little too close to home.
The best thing for the moment was to get it all out of his head. Sasuke wondered if he might be able to track down Kakashi for an impromptu training session.
Kakashi had just found a nice tree to read beneath. The sun was shining, the birds were making little bird noises, and since he had summarily failed his latest group of genin, there was nothing he needed to get done for the next several days at least. All was right with the world. "Kakashi sensei.... Ummm... Kakashi sensei..." Kakashi looked up from his novel with a start. "Naruto-kun!" He said, "What an unexpected surprise. What are you doing here?"
"Actually," the blond hair boy blurted out embarrassedly, "I kind of need your advice."
"What is it?"
"Ummm..." he said, bending forward and lowering his voice to a whisper, "It's kind of personal."
Under his mask, Kakashi seemed to smile compassionately. "There, there," he said, patting the moss beside him. "Sit down and tell your Uncle Kakashi all about it."
Hurriedly Naruto slid to the ground. "Thanks." He said. "It's just that... this is the kind of thing I don't think I can really say to Iruka sensei. And telling the Pervert Sennin..." he shuddered and looked at Kakashi dubiously. "That pretty much leaves you."
Kakashi bent forward. "What is it?"
"Ok... what if... two of your oldest friends suddenly told you they were dating."
Kakashi leaned back against the trunk, disappointed. "That's it?"
"No!" Naruto snapped. "That's not it!"
"Ok, then, go on."
"Ok. So, what if, after you found out these friends were dating, they asked you too..."
"What?"
"do something romantic with them."
Kakashi almost chocked on his mask. "What kind of something romantic?" He asked.
"I don't know! I left before I had a chance to find out!"
Kakashi stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Must be a threesome," he decided.
Naruto buried his head in his hands and groaned.
"But who would want to have a threesome with you?" Kakashi asked.
Naruto only groaned again. "Let me try and guess," Kakashi said helpfully. He thought for a moment. "Sasuke and Sakura?" He didn't really think the two of them were going out, and the idea of Sakura even considering, much less agreeing to a threesome with Naruto seemed far fetched, but then no one else was coming to mind. Besides, Kakashi wasn't blind. He had seen the way Sasuke had been watching Naruto for a long time... somehow, he considered, he must have talked Sakura into it. Maybe the pink-haired girl had a hidden kinky side. Mentally, he weighed the options.
Naruto blushed. "No. Sasuke..." he said "... and Hinata,"
"Hyuuga Hinata?" Kakashi said. The blond nodded furiously.
"That," Kakashi said, "Is something I never thought of. It's always the quiet ones, isn't it?"
Naruto looked blank.
"Ok," Kakashi said. "So may I assume from your reaction to all this that you're not interested?"
Naruto turned an even deeper shade of red. "No!" He yelled. "I mean, how freaky would that be?" He buried his head even lower. "There's another problem too."
"Hmm?"
"I was sort of interested ... well, not anymore. But, before the whole them-becoming-a-couple thing..." he stopped. "You like Sasuke?" Kakashi asked. Naruto glared at him.
"You like Hinata?"
Naruto sighed. "I like neither," he said defensively. "Forget I even
tried to talk to you."
"Now, now," Kakashi said. "Don't say that. I have great experience
with romantic entanglements. Let me think about it." He closed his
eye meditatively. Naruto waited, expectant.
"Nope," Kakashi said, cheerfully, "Nothing. I need more time. I'll think about it and get back to you, ok?"
Naruto sighed.
Sasuke and Hinata glared at each other. They had left Naruto's home, and all Sasuke wanted to do was head back to his apartment and then train until he fell down dead. Apparently, Hinata had the same idea. Unfortunately, the Hyuuga and the Uchiha estates were in the same part of town.
He had been watching Hinata for some time – it was clear she had something she wanted to say to him, and that she had been building up the courage to say it for some time. Finally she spoke.
"Sasuke-kun," she said.
Oh damn, Sasuke thought. He had been hoping the road would split before she got up the nerve.
"It looks like Naruto-kun doesn't like either of us, does it?" She asked quietly.
He didn't think that required a reply.
"Are you... uh... going to give up?"
He looked at her. "No. Are you?"
"No." She said, surprisingly firm.
They walked a while longer.
"What's the next step?" She asked, hesitantly.
Sasuke turned to her with a confident smirk. "What's your next step? I have no idea." They had finally reached the corner where the road split. "From here on out, you're on your own."
So Sasuke said, but actually he had no idea what to do, either. Confessing, he had thought, would be the hard part, but given Naruto's reaction to his confession he wondered if he would even be able to salvage a fraction of their former friendship. Why had Naruto freaked out so much, anyway? Presumably it was because Sasuke was a guy, and Naruto couldn't handle having a guy like him. But Naruto had always seemed pretty tolerant of homosexuality in the past – maybe, Sasuke thought with a surge of irrational hope, Naruto freaked out because Sasuke's confession was hitting a little too close to home.
The best thing for the moment was to get it all out of his head. Sasuke wondered if he might be able to track down Kakashi for an impromptu training session.