Title: Narn o-Imladris
Author: Punisher
Beta: Sunsong (Thank you!!)
Rating: PG-13, with R bits
Contact: Punisher8209@yahoo.com
Characters: Erestor, Glorfindel, Elrond, Ereinion, Celebrían
Summary: [AU] Second Age, year 3441: Gil-galad is afraid to change, Elrond
is afraid to speak, Celebrían is afraid to think, and Glorfindel is afraid
to act. In other words, what if certain Elves chose differently before, during
and after the Last Alliance?
Warning: Because of implied Elfling-rape, heavy-handed angst and plot
elements that can be construed as Slash, this story is not for impressionable
kiddies of nervous disposition. For the Tolkien purest, this is an AU which
tries to stay as Canon as possible. So readers beware, and read at your own
peril.
Disclaimer: Tolkien is God of Middle-earth, and I am one of his many self-appointed prophets. No money is being made and no copyright infringement is intended.
faithfully recorded by Mithemyn
translated by Bilbo Baggins
~~~oo00oo~~~
FOREWORD
Somewhere in the libraries of Tirion lies a manuscript recording a little known piece of Middle-earth's history. It is titled: Narn uin i-Brannon-a-Brennil o-Imladris, "The Tale of the Lords and Ladies of Rivendell". Unlike other books in Tirion, it is written in the Common Tongue, and not often read by the Eldar, if it is read at all. But the manuscript's lack of popularity does not change the fact that it remains one of the most controversial texts in Elvish history.
Originally written in Sindarin by an Elvish scholar named Mithemyn, Narn o-Imladris was later copied and translated by Bilbo Baggins. Unlike his other works, the translation was not passed down to Frodo, for the old Hobbit thought the contents too disturbing for the public eye. Instead it was kept in Elrond's private library, and eventually taken to Valinor, where it languished on the rear corner-most shelf in the libraries of Tirion.
The original Narn o-Imladris was rediscovered in Valinor when the members of the House of the Golden Flower sought the reason as to why their kinsman, Glorfindel, never returned to Aman after the destruction of the One Ring. None who came from Middle-earth after the Third Age knew the answer, Elrond was no more (1), and Celebrían did not know the tale. She did, however, tell them of a recorded song telling Glorfindel's tale during the Second and Third Age. In their quest to find this text they discovered Narn o-Imladris, but the contents of the prologue raised such ire that they destroyed the manuscript and score.
Not until the approach of Dagor Dagorath was Narn o-Imladris remembered again. Many great elves of old were restored in preparation for the final battle, but Glorfindel was not among them; his spirit never came to the Halls, and even Mandos could not tell of his doom. Elrond was one of the first to return, alongside Ereinion Gil-galad. He remembered the score written by Mithemyn, but could not find it where he had last placed it. He inquired as to its whereabouts, but the Elves were reluctant to confess their destruction of the score. Instead they asked why it was necessary to seek the document. Elrond perceived something was amiss, and told them that within the score lay writ the doom of the Avari, and Glorfindel's fate, for Glorfindel oft voiced his desire to follow them. When they learned what befell the manuscript, Elrond and Ereinion spoke no more of it, instead seeking Bilbo's translation. Finally the manuscript was brought to light.
Now the tale is archived in the virtual libraries of Men, for all to read. Though the Eldar think it a shame and travesty, and Mortals take it as piece of fiction and nothing more, it is written memory. The prologue details the history of the key figures of the tale before the actual beginning, and the bulk of the 'disturbing parts' (as Bilbo called it) lie there. As for the validity of the tale, it cannot be verified; for none now live who remember.
~~~oo00oo~~~
PROLOGUE
I
Concerning Ereinion Gil-galad
Finarfin was the great-grandfather of the Elvenking. (2) His grandson Orodreth, son of Angrod, wed a Sindarin lady from the northern lands. She first bore Finduilas, and many decades later, Ereinion. Like Míriel before her, in the bearing of her son the wife of Orodreth was consumed in body and spirit. Unlike Míriel, she refused to fade or seek death, and clung to life for the sake of her family, and especially her son, who lost favor with both sister and father because of her anguish.
When Ereinion was eight and ten years of age, he was sent to the Havens to be fostered with Círdan the shipwright. Bitter tears flowed from the eyes of the young Prince as he traveled to the western-most shores of Middle-earth, for he knew in his heart that he would never see his family again. In truth, he would last see his mother before the Sack of Nargothrond, when she and Finduilas was captured, and later killed by orcs at the Crossings of Teiglin.
But the years Ereinion spent in the Havens were not wholly unpleasant or sad; Círdan loved him as a son, and Ereinion later gained the favor of Fingon the Valiant. The High King spoke many praises to Ereinion, but most forward among these was of Ereinion's great resemblance to Fingon's half-cousin Maedhros with his hair the color of a golden sunset, and though still young, he was tall in stature and well shaped in body. Later Fingon declared Ereinion his son in spirit, and sought to adopt him as heir. But five years after their meeting, Fingon commanded the assault upon Morgoth that became known as the Nirnaeth Arnoediad, the Unnumbered Tears, and in that assault was himself slain by Gothmog, Lord of Balrogs. After the death of Fingon, the High Kingship passed to Turgon, and Ereinion returned to Círdan's care.
~~~~
In the months following Fingon's death Ereinion fell silent; he would not speak nor sing, and even his body seem to ail with a sickness that would not let him eat. Círdan was greatly troubled when no healer of the Eldar could heal his charge, and in desperation sought a potion maker of the Avari he had taken under his service. What Círdan did not know was that he had taken Ereinion to the very Elf who had caused his bodily ailment.
The motives of the potion maker are unknown. (3) After taking Ereinion inside a deserted part of the healing quarters, supposedly for an examination, the treacherous Avari drugged the Prince and went through the full rites of coupling. (4) Ereinion was half-conscious throughout the ordeal, and in his innocence and confused state did not understand what happened. Círdan had little reason to suspect anything afterwards, for Ereinion no longer suffered from his previous ailments, and the Prince did not speak of the "treatment."
But Círdan saw many things and read many hearts. It was he who noticed the close timing between the sudden departure of the Avari potion maker and Ereinion's new found fear against all women save those he deemed close kin, and so perceived something strange had befallen. When at last Ereinion yielded to his questions and forced himself to recall what had transpired, they both realized to their horror the Prince had coupled with, and was hence bound to the long departed potion maker. The pain of realization that his soul was irrevocably tied to the treacherous Avari, and the memory of the forced coupling, cast Ereinion's spirit adrift between his body and the Halls of Waiting. Yet in the end, Ereinion found the strength to return, much to the tearful relief of Círdan. Upon being asked why he chose to live with such a horrid memory, the Prince had answered with no joy:
"What use a scion of kings if he is dead?"
But Ereinion's awakening did not mark an end of the matter. Rather, it was the beginning of a battle no Elf could hope to win: technically wed, Ereinion was doomed to live alone so long as his bonded still lived, and he fought a constant war against his desire to forsake life and find peace in the Halls of Reflection. Yet fight he did, hiding his grief behind a mask of false joy, forced laughter, and contrived clumsiness if all else failed; and thus none but those who knew him well suspected the nigh unbearable burden he carried in his heart.
Ereinion's burdens did not lessen in the years that followed, and were only increased after the Sack of Nargothrond. He continued to live with a knife in his heart and led the remnant of his father's people to the Mouths of Sirion. There he established his first realm of Elves, and was acknowledged as King. Annael, leader of the group of Sindar who fostered Tuor, reached the Mouths of Sirion afterwards, and joined Ereinion when, at Cirdan's invitation, he and his people moved to Balar.
~~~~
When Ereinion was five and sixty years of age, the Fall of Gondolin and death of Turgon came to pass. The High Kingship then passed to the House of Finarfin, of whom the last male descendant was Ereinion. The refugees of Gondolin found sanctuary in the Havens of Sirion. Ereinion befriended Tuor, Idril, and eventually their son, Eärendil. He helped Tuor and Idril establish that community of Elves and Men, which later became known as Arvernien, and oft invited his kin from the Houses of Turgon and Tuor to Balar. During those visits he and Tuor discussed many things, but what interested Ereinion the most was the spirit and life and fate of Men.
"Strange are the race of Men," Ereinion once remarked, "Though shackled with ailing bodies, ever constrained by limited lifetimes, and doomed with the uncertainty of Death, they endure memories and experiences that would surely kill an Elf."
"Perhaps," Tuor had answered, "And yet elves do not feel the creeping of old age, and the ever increasing witlessness of failing minds."
"But do not Mortals have the ability to forget the past?" asked Ereinion.
"We do," agreed Tuor. "Though I would not call it an ability; Mortals have little control over it, and often we forget what we must remember, and remember what we wish to forget."
At this, Ereinion became thoughtful, and mused out loud: "Still, for Men it seems that time blurs even the most painful of memories, and so they choose to live despite them. Elves do not have such luxury; every memory is as clear as the time it happened, will we or nill we." Then he sighed, "Though I am very young, I wish the sweetness of oblivion. Hence I would say the race of Men is blessed."
Ereinion and Tuor spoke no more of the matter. Tuor dwelt with the Exiles at the Mouths of Sirion for a time, but feeling old age advancing upon him, he built the great ship Eärrámë and sailed into the West with Idril.
~~~~
After the passing of Tuor and Idril, Eärendil the Mariner at last followed the song of his heart and went to sea. He ever sought a way to Aman, in order to gain the aid of the Valar against the creeping darkness of Morgoth. His friendship with Ereinion did not suffer from either distance or long absence, and the High King welcomed him with open arms whenever he came to his realm. Ereinion personally blessed the union of Eärendil and Elwing, and was present during the birth of Elrond and Elros. Ereinion loved the twin sons of Eärendil, and ever inquired after their health and growth. These were happy times for Ereinion, and his people rejoiced.
This period of happiness was cut brutally short when the Sons of Fëanor attacked the Arvernien to gain the Silmaril, heirloom of the House of Elwing. The High King learned too late of the attack, and when he arrived with Círdan, the streets of Arvernien ran with blood, and the air with the cries of mourners. In his grief Ereinion haunted the blood stained halls of the estate, and the forests beyond, seeking the sons of Eärendil. For a week he searched, never pausing even to partake of food or drink, calling out the names Elrond and Elros.
Finally Ereinion fell to his knees in defeat, and in his sorrow repeatedly struck his forehead against the floor, paying no heed to the shards of glass and broken blades littered all around him. At last he lifted his blood and tear-stained face to the heavens, crying out:
"How can I claim to be High King, when I cannot save even those I love most?"
It is told a shard of glass cut the forehead of Ereinion that day, and thereafter he bore a scar that ran from his hairline to the bridge of his nose. The scar did not fade with time, and reopened and bled through years to come. Ereinion and Círdan eventually returned to Balar with the few people who did not perish, yet it seemed the King had become as cold and dark as the winter night. He refused to wear his crown and use the title High King until the end of the War of Wrath.
~~~~
Great white ships came from the West, as Eärendil had envisioned. The Host of Valinor held victory against Morgoth, who was banished from the World. Angband was destroyed, and the peoples of Beleriand survived the land's reshaping. After the fate of the two remaining Silmarils was accounted for, Ereinion was summoned to come before Eönwë, Herald of Manwë, and Finarfin, his great-grandfather. Ereinion answered the summons, and when he arrived Eönwë came forth and greeted him:
"Hail Ereinion, High King of the Exiles, loved and bringing greater love, hoped for, yet giving brighter hope! Hail Ereinion, radiant starlight of Elves, the jewel shining in the darkness! Hail Ereinion Gil-Galad, bearer of hopes! Come forth and meet thy forefather, whom thou hast only known in tales!"
Ereinion bowed low to whom he considered the true High King of the Noldor, yet Finarfin raised Ereinion's head to kiss his brow.
"It gladdens my heart to know my line has not failed, despite all the follies of the House of Finwë," he said, "Yet I see in your face that they have taken their toll; you do not look as was expected." Indeed, the century of sorrow had ravaged much of Ereinion's hailed beauty, which Tuor and Eärendil described to Finarfin in great detail, and yet now Ereinion bore a face that could easily blend into a crowd of Elves, and none would be the wiser of his honorable status. Yet he was still fair, and his deep blue eyes were like to a starry midnight sky and just as unfathomable. Moreover, in person, nothing of Ereinion was forgettable, and even the blindest of Mortals should perceive the great white flame burning within him should he choose to reveal himself.
"Hard were my days," agreed Ereinion, "Though I bore no more than those living around me. But your presence alone fills me with hope and joy; mayhap all of our sorrows will be assuaged before you depart, if that is your will."
"I will depart, with the rest of the Host, but we need not be separated unless you wish it," said Finarfin, "For it is my greatest wish that all of my family return with me, and leave the sorrows of Middle-earth." Ereinion stiffened at the words 'family', and Finarfin noticed this. "Though I behold you for the first time, and I have not yet met your family, I still count you as my own, for you are the only son of my beloved grandson Orodreth."
But Ereinion was not calmed by Finarfin's kind words, and became still more agitated. Finarfin was bewildered at his reaction, and looked at him more closely. He was astonished at what he saw: "Your eyes and breath tell me that you have bound with someone, and yet the light of your eyes is not wholly like to those whose union is blessed by the Lady. How is this so?"
Ereinion did not answer, but before Finarfin could ask again, Eönwë spoke: "Hear me, Ereinion of the House of Finwë; though the Valar may know all the comings and goings of Arda, from the smallest plant to the most insignificant of beasts, they cannot move to work in thy behalf so long as thou art determined to keep all to thyself. As such, thy friends and kin cannot help thee with thy burdens so long thou wouldst hoard them in darkness. Look into thy heart, see if there lies aught that thee needest others to know."
Thus Ereinion finally revealed the forced coupling of his childhood. Every word he spoke was laced with pain so great his flesh barely contained it, and in the end the barely healed skin of his forehead shriveled away and his scar bled anew. Finarfin was rendered speechless, but when he recovered he raved to the Heavens and the West, demanding how so foul a deed could happen when the Valar were still enthroned in power. Then he cursed all the Avari, and wished them naught but sorrow in life and everlasting darkness in death. Eönwë listened, but Ereinion begged Finarfin to withdraw his curse, pleading: "Should we curse all Avari for the deed of one, then we shall be no better than those who curse all Noldor as kinslayers."
But Finarfin would not, and wept bitterly as he held Ereinion in his arms; for he was sure he would soon lose the last of his grandchildren to the Halls for all eternity. Rape was a defilement too great for a spirit of the Eldar to endure, and almost all of its victims remained in Mandos' Halls, unable to find peace. The few who did return, or somehow found reason or strength to linger afterwards, inevitably came to Mandos' care, wasted in their futile efforts.
When finally his tears were spent, Finarfin asked Eönwë: "What say the Lords of the West? What respite will they grant my child? How will they save him from shadow and grief?"
"Verily the Valar will not let this matter lie," said Eönwë gravely. "Ereinion is more loved than you realize; many a prayer has been lifted in his behalf and the lady has heard them all. The matter hath been discussed, and this is their judgment:
"The union of Ereinion Gil-galad and the unnamed Avari cannot be voided, for Ereinion forfeited that right when he fought the summons of Mandos. But the union was formed when Ereinion was robbed of his will, and is without the blessings of the West, least of all Lord Manwë and Lady Varda. Therefore, though he cannot seek another spouse, so long as this Avari remains in Eä, Ereinion Gil-galad is under no obligation to remain faithful to his so-called union; he is granted the right to seek love again, so long as he remains unbound to another, and will remain so until the end of time."
Hence the clause for Cruel and Unnatural Unions (5) was added to the Laws and Customs of the Eldar. Though it did not dissolve an Elven union, for it was against their nature, it allowed some respite to those spouses whose union the Valar deemed a travesty. But in the end it was little comfort; even if the sacrifices of the "second choice" are discounted, it did not solve the root of the problem, and all outcomes lay with the judgment of Valar, whose thought is beyond all. As for Ereinion, he did not think it such a boon as was meant, but did not speak of such thoughts, remaining silent.
~~~~
Immediately after his meeting with Finarfin and Eönwë, Ereinion walked the shores in solitude for many days, deep in thought. The many hours of quiet contemplation had given him insight into matters he had hitherto overlooked, and he wondered what else he did not understand. On the seventh day of his wandering, and the day before Eönwë would announce the doom of all Elves in Middle-earth, Ereinion came upon a small group of Man-children playing in the sand.
At first he was content to watch them from afar, but when a woman hailed them to return, the children left one of their playfellows behind as they rushed towards her. Suddenly gripped by indescribable foreboding and anticipation, Ereinion approached the Man-child.
"I see that your friends have left you," he said.
The child looked up, and blushed when she realized she was addressed by an Elf of obviously great stature. "My heart is weak, so Mama says I shouldn't run," she explained, "I told them to go ahead of me. I would only slow them down."
"Is that so?" said Ereinion. "Then let me carry you to your encampment; you are little burden to me, and your parents would become worried should you be late."
So Ereinion put the child on his shoulders and walked where she directed him. The pair made a curious sight; and those who saw them watched in awe and marveled, and told it to others as a sight never seen before and never to be seen again. But this was not be first time the High King of the Noldor carried a grimy Mortal child on his shoulders, and it would not be the last.
A short distance away from the child's encampment, Ereinion put the child back on the ground. Before he left, he asked, "What is your name, child?"
She answered, "Finduilas."
Ereinion froze, and stared at the child before him. "Finduilas," he whispered, "I had a sister by that name."
"What happened to her?" asked the child. "Did she die? I thought Elves didn't die!"
Ereinion then stood like a statue wrought of mithril, and at last answered, "No child. Elves can die, be they broken in body or spirit."
The child nodded in wonder, and looked at the face of the High King.
"Is that why you are you are so sad?" she asked. "You look like my mother did when the men told her my brother and father were not going to come back home." Then she looked at him anxiously. "My mother was so sad, she fell upon a sword. I live with my Aunt now … Will you die too?" She fumbled with the pockets of her skirt, and finally pulled out a copper chain holding a small, unblemished pendent of purple crystal. "This is my favorite necklace. I hope it will make you happy."
She placed the trinket into Ereinion's palm, and for a while he did not speak or move. Then he curled his fingers around it and said, "Thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart." He knelt before her and placed a kiss on her forehead. "I shall cherish this until the end of time, so long I have a body to hold it."
"Even to the West?" asked Finduilas. "I heard all the Elves are going there, leaving everything behind."
Ereinion smiled. "No Finduilas, not all of them will leave. Some cannot go, for they are still forbidden. Some will not go, for they love these lands too much." He caressed the her cheek. "I will not go. Perhaps not out of love for Middle-earth in and of itself, but for people like you who must dwell in it. So long as I am needed, I shall remain."
~~~~
The night after Ereinion announced his decision, Círdan came to him on behalf of Finarfin. He found Ereinion sitting on his bed dressed as a common soldier, and marveled at the lack of sadness in his countenance. But he did not inquire of it, and said, "Ereinion … I know I cannot stop you, but I cannot help but worry; to this day I have lived in fear that I would lose you to Mandos' Halls, through grief or battle, as all did during those dangerous times. Now that the ban against the Noldor has been lifted, I expected to lose you to the West, as it was clear you could not find peace on these shores; but at the same time I was relieved, as the latter would let us reunite in the Blessed Realm.
"Our parting is inevitable, Ereinion, and I do not begrudge anyone of it, least of all you. Each young bird must leave its mother's nest, never to return, so it can learn to fly. But you have thwarted all my expectations and hopes by deciding to tarry in Middle-earth, so you can watch over the Elves who will remain and help the race of Men. Now I am but a foolish old Elf, who perhaps cannot see beyond the Elfling whom he held many times at night, as he wept over his loss, though he had proven time and time again stronger than those around him. And yet … I should not be saying this, but for many years I thought you were more concerned over the fate of Men than our people. You seem to go ever deeper into the world of Mortals, as if …"
Ereinion suddenly laughed, and Círdan stared at him in astonishment.
"Look at this," said Ereinion, holding out a chain of copper, "It is a mortal girl's favorite necklace, and probably a memory of her mother, yet she gave it to me. I met this girl for the first time last eve, and I carried her to her encampment because she had a weak heart."
He handed the chain to Círdan. "Will you clasp this around my neck?" he asked. And Círdan, startled, complied without a word.
"I love the race of Men," said Ereinion, "I think them a people of great strength and potential, who will one day outlive and outstrip us. But in the same way, I love my people. I have never forgotten them, especially those who lifted prayers in my behalf, and I will never forget my great-grandfather, who shed tears for me.
"When I was been entrusted with this Kingship, I was afraid. But now, it is strange even to me, but I am not afraid at all. I can hear a voice in my heart, and it tells me to go forward— to change, accomplish, and above of all, progress. All I can think of now is going forward, as far as I am able. My mind is filled with a vision of a Kingdom where anyone can come and find their place in the world, whatever their past. And I do not mean just Elves— all other races will be welcomed, so long they reject the shadow and darkness that lingers here still. I think I will start it here, where the Host of Valinor first came, and mark the beginning of a new Age."
Ereinion smiled at Círdan, who could not speak.
"Perhaps I am just a foolish young Elf, who does not have the wisdom of his elders," said Ereinion, "But I cannot help but feel that I am not alone. It is as if many people and forces are watching over me, waiting for me to make my first steps. I am not so arrogant as to believe that I shall succeed in my efforts, but at least I can pave the way so that those who come after me will achieve greater heights."
Here ends this tale, as it was told by Círdan; and with the coming of the Second Age, no more is said in this book of Ereinion during the First.
(1) When I said: "Elrond was no more," it means (spoiler alert!) that Elrond goes to the Halls because he is irreparably exhausted after the events of the third age.
(2) I know the Silmarillion says Gil-galad is the son of Fingon. But in The Peoples of Middle-earth Christopher Tolkien devoted a brief commentary to the parentage of Gil-galad on pages 349-51. It appears that the true genealogy of Gil-galad places him as the son of Orodreth, who himself was the son of Angrod, and not one of the children of Finarfin. "There can be no doubt that this was my father's last word on the subject," Christopher tells us. His final statement reads: "Much closer analysis of the admittedly extremely complex material than I had made twenty years ago makes it clear that Gil-galad as the son of Fingon (see XI.56,243) was an ephemeral idea." I took Tolkien's word as Canon, but tried to consolidate the "Gil-galad Fingonion" idea as well. And I was tired of "typically Noldor" Gil-galad; putting him in the line of Finarfin allows some plausible variety.
(3) I thought two reasons behind the rape: a) the Avari was corrupted by Morgoth (or Sauron, doesn't really matter), and tried to kill Ereinion without slaying him. What makes the crime more heinous is that Ereinion would never be able to return from the Halls once he went there: either he couldn't survive the memory, or the Avari could condemn him to the Halls if s/he marries another, like it was for Finwe and Miriel. b) A more romantic version (though it by no means tries to vindicate the Avari) which is still on the works. Let's just say that I've been reading too many Ninja stories as of late.
(4) "The rites of coupling": According to Morgoth's Ring, the Eldar marry only once, and it is "chiefly of the body." No formal ceremony is required, and during the times of war and distress, it was often the case a couple would just consummate their bond and that was enough. Judging from Tolkien's words and religious background, there is no such thing as casual or extra-marital sex for the Eldar. There is only one documented case where an Elf married twice, and he is Finwë. The author (Mithemyn) and wrote Narn o-Imladris under the assumption that there was an invocation or ritual the Elves practiced before or during the consummation of marriage.
(5) "clause for Cruel and Unnatural Unions": No such thing has ever been mentioned by Tolkien or in his works, and is purely a contrivance of the author.