Kaitlyn - A brand new disclaimer. Lets have a party.
Will - ~*~ bound and gagged ~*~ Met Mee Mo.
Kaitlyn - No! I own you, your mine all mine Mwahahaha!!
Jack - you know Kait that there's sugar over there ~*~ points to a door~*~ that's it through there ~*~ slams door shut and locks it ~*~
Kaitlyn - You won't get away with this! I will own you all after my minions bring me my army of cabbages!!!!!! Just you wait!!
Chapter 10 - A Plastasine Bridge.
AAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SPLASH!!!!!
I hit the water at top speed and by George it is cold. Okay think warm thoughts . . . erm . . . a hot water bottle . . .. Hot chocolate . . . Curry . . .. The sun . . .. Ice-lolly. . No you idiot that's cold. Okay start again . . . hot steaming cup of tea . . . the Caribbean . . . yeah this is the Caribbean so the water should actually be quite warm.
AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
I turned round to see Jez jump off the plank and hit the water. I started to swim back to her when something hit me on the head, I'm going to end up with brain damage by the end of this (A/n - yes I know I'm evil to keep hitting Kait on the head but I'm torturing her Mwahaha * cough * haha). I looked down to see a black object floating to the bottom of the deep blue sea. Guns should be banned especially if they hit me on the head.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I woke up on a beach. The stupid matal thing knocked me out. I looked around and saw Jez. Jack and Elizabeth sat around the fire. I got up and walked to them.
"Hey! What you doing my fellow chopsticks?" I asked sitting next to Jez.
"Seggittegging beggy egga ceggamp feggiregge,"* she replied. Why is she talking in egg? * I'll translate at the end of the chappy *
Before I could ask what the hell did she just say Elizabeth spoke up.
"Yegges, beggut yeggoeggu meggust geggo teggo thegge breggidgegge keggaeggitleggyn," she said pointing to the trees.
"Okay, what did you just say cause I didn't know you could speak egg?" I said even more confused.
"She said," I turned to see who had spoken this bit, it was a monkey, "that you must go to the bridge Kaitlyn."
"W-what bridge?"
"Oh dear, follow me darling I'll show you," the monkey said bounding off into the trees. I followed it out of curiosity more than anything.
It lead me into a clearing in the trees were a stream ran through. Across the stream there was a bridge but it was bright yellow. Barbossa was stood by it moulding an end into the shape of a stick man.
"Why Hello my dear, I take it you'll be wanting to cross me bridge," he said not looking up.
"Um . . . Yeah?" I said unsure about what was going on. They never showed this in the movie.
"Well then that'll be three chocolate chip cookies please," he said holding out his hand. Since when did Barbossa say please?
"I don't have any . . ." I started but was interrupted by a tugging at my jeans leg. I looked down and saw a Nac Mac Feegle (a/n - Nac Mac Feegles are from a Terry Pratchett book called the Wee Free Men. It's very good.) He was covered in blue tattoos and was dressed in a kilt that had seen better days. Now I am dreaming.
"Weel noo, you have two choices here mistress, one you can offski an' two we can hit im on the heid for ya. I'd go for the second one if I wuz you," the feegle that had tugged on my leg said. (A/n - they're Scottish)
I was in shock so I just nodded my head.
"Aye ok." He held up his sword and turned round "you heard her lads GIT IM!"
As fast as you could say offski a whole army of feegles charged at Barbossa. A couple of them climbed up Barbossa, who was now running about screaming, wuss, they reached his head and head butted him. He took one look at the little blue dude and fell over.
"Wohoo go blue dudes!" I shouted jumping up and down clapping my hands. Like I said before Barbossa gives me the creeps.
"Aye, but you dun know why yer ere do you?" One of them asked.
"Well, no but I'm just going to go back to my friends now if you don't mind," I said turning around.
"Crivens! NO! You cannea go back mistress they've been turned," he shouted.
"Into what?"
"One of them, mistress, they no longer see what's really there," he said again.
"One of them? Don't see?" These people are more confusing than an upside down back to front road sign.
"Aye, watch this," just then Jez came running into the clearing.
"Jez! Jez! Lookie then Wee Free Men!" I shouted over to her pointing to the group.
"What are you talking about Kaitlyn? There's no one there. It's just sand and grass." She said in a very non-Jezzy way.
"Of course they are look! And there's Barbossa!" I said pointing frantically at the floor. Why can't she see them it's not fair? Well they are tiny and she's like way tall but still why?
"Kaitlyn, are you okay?" She asked me. It was then that it dawned on me.
"Oh my bag of skittles your normal!" I said looking at her in her eyes.
"Why yes Kaitlyn and so will you be in a minute," she said. She took a step back and whistled a very off tune melody that sounded like something George of the Jungle.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"
CRASH!
Elizabeth had swung on a vine and crashed into a tree. Jack who was staggering closely followed her into the clearing.
"Hiya! Kaity -loo the loopy loo! How are you?" He said suppressing a fit of giggles.
"Aye, I told you they had been turned, your only chance is to git acrooos the bridge but . . ." The Nac Mac Feegle paused nervously moving from foot to foot.
"But what?"
"It's made outa plastacine, it might not hold a big job," he said. He better be grateful that I have read the book and know that big job means a normal sized being and not a fat person.
"PLASTACINE!?!" I screamed. I knew this was a suicidal mission.
"Aye!" He said looking down.
"KKKKAAAAAAIIIIIITTTTTTLLLLLYYYYNNNNNN!!!!!" the three 'turned' people started wailing. Their arms where whirling about all over the place and they started to glow yellow then green then blue then . . . well you get the idea.
"You will be turned Kaitlyn," Elizabeth said advancing on me.
"Aye, you will," Jack said. The three closed in on me. I looked around for the Feegles. They had disappeared. Great, I'm going to die what ever I do.
"Eep!"
"Kaitlyn!" What? Now I'm hearing voices in my head?
I decided that the bridge was the better option, as I didn't like the odd colour the others had turned. I turned towards it but to my surprise Will was speeding down the stream in a speedboat with Legolas and Aragorn.
"YIPEE! I'M SAVED! YAY!" I ran towards them and jumped on the boat that had slowed down.
"Do you not know your name?" Legolas asked.
"Well, no!" I said.
"YEEHAAA!" Will shouted from the wheel. "I'm a cowboy now!"
"Yeah right Will, what did Barbossa do to you?" I asked.
"He feed me lots of sugar and sweet things so that I will grow fatter so that he could cook me in his gigantic cooker called the Black Pearl," I said matter-of-factly. Great we have a sugar high blacksmith, a cute elf and a rather annoyed looking ranger.
"DUCK!" Legolas Shouted.
"What where?" I said looking up. Stupid me got the wrong meaning. The boat was going under the bridge. It wouldn't have been that bad if it hadn't turned into wood.
"Ow!" I'm definitely going to end up with brain damage at the end of this. As per usual I knocked myself out.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"How many times does one person need to knock themselves out?" Jack asked Jez as he put Kait down on the sand.
"Erm lets see it's happened about three times now so times that by 456.32 then take 11 you get A LOT!" Jez replied, "Do you think we should throw water on her?"
"She's wet enough," Elizabeth said.
"Okay I'll just poke her then," Jez sat down beside Kait and started poking her side. Just then Kait sat bolt upright banging heads with Jez.
"YOU STUPID POINTY EARED NIDJIT! And ow!" Kait said rubbing her head. "Wait! Where's Legolas and Aragorn and Will and the speed boat and, and the bridge?"
"Erm, Will was captured and Legolas and Aragorn don't belong here." Jez replied.
"Are you Normal?"
"Hell no Kaity loo the Loopy loo."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Yes I know that was a pointless chapter but I really did dream that. I'm also avoiding doing coursework course I really don't want to go back to school. Okay since I start back on Thursday I'm going to try and get the rest of this written on paper but I want you to tell me if you would like a sequel with Jez and Kait so then I can think up ideas Kay? So review my darlings and let me know.
Captain Sophie - Thank you. I'll tell you why, there are very few of us in this world who are crazy sane (that is were crazy is your normal state of mind) we are the normal ones. So if some one looks at you strange when you shout out random words it's because they are insane. Kay? Did that make any sense?
Jlm -of course they like you.
Niccy-b - t'was good and funny? Yay! When are you going to update again?
Raven185 - I updated soon see?
TRANSLATIONS!
Seggittegging beggy egga ceggamp feggiregge - Sitting by a camp fire.
Yegges, beggut yeggoeggu meggust geggo teggo thegge breggidgegge keggaeggitleggyn - yes, but you must go to the bridge Kaitlyn.
Will - ~*~ bound and gagged ~*~ Met Mee Mo.
Kaitlyn - No! I own you, your mine all mine Mwahahaha!!
Jack - you know Kait that there's sugar over there ~*~ points to a door~*~ that's it through there ~*~ slams door shut and locks it ~*~
Kaitlyn - You won't get away with this! I will own you all after my minions bring me my army of cabbages!!!!!! Just you wait!!
Chapter 10 - A Plastasine Bridge.
AAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SPLASH!!!!!
I hit the water at top speed and by George it is cold. Okay think warm thoughts . . . erm . . . a hot water bottle . . .. Hot chocolate . . . Curry . . .. The sun . . .. Ice-lolly. . No you idiot that's cold. Okay start again . . . hot steaming cup of tea . . . the Caribbean . . . yeah this is the Caribbean so the water should actually be quite warm.
AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
I turned round to see Jez jump off the plank and hit the water. I started to swim back to her when something hit me on the head, I'm going to end up with brain damage by the end of this (A/n - yes I know I'm evil to keep hitting Kait on the head but I'm torturing her Mwahaha * cough * haha). I looked down to see a black object floating to the bottom of the deep blue sea. Guns should be banned especially if they hit me on the head.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I woke up on a beach. The stupid matal thing knocked me out. I looked around and saw Jez. Jack and Elizabeth sat around the fire. I got up and walked to them.
"Hey! What you doing my fellow chopsticks?" I asked sitting next to Jez.
"Seggittegging beggy egga ceggamp feggiregge,"* she replied. Why is she talking in egg? * I'll translate at the end of the chappy *
Before I could ask what the hell did she just say Elizabeth spoke up.
"Yegges, beggut yeggoeggu meggust geggo teggo thegge breggidgegge keggaeggitleggyn," she said pointing to the trees.
"Okay, what did you just say cause I didn't know you could speak egg?" I said even more confused.
"She said," I turned to see who had spoken this bit, it was a monkey, "that you must go to the bridge Kaitlyn."
"W-what bridge?"
"Oh dear, follow me darling I'll show you," the monkey said bounding off into the trees. I followed it out of curiosity more than anything.
It lead me into a clearing in the trees were a stream ran through. Across the stream there was a bridge but it was bright yellow. Barbossa was stood by it moulding an end into the shape of a stick man.
"Why Hello my dear, I take it you'll be wanting to cross me bridge," he said not looking up.
"Um . . . Yeah?" I said unsure about what was going on. They never showed this in the movie.
"Well then that'll be three chocolate chip cookies please," he said holding out his hand. Since when did Barbossa say please?
"I don't have any . . ." I started but was interrupted by a tugging at my jeans leg. I looked down and saw a Nac Mac Feegle (a/n - Nac Mac Feegles are from a Terry Pratchett book called the Wee Free Men. It's very good.) He was covered in blue tattoos and was dressed in a kilt that had seen better days. Now I am dreaming.
"Weel noo, you have two choices here mistress, one you can offski an' two we can hit im on the heid for ya. I'd go for the second one if I wuz you," the feegle that had tugged on my leg said. (A/n - they're Scottish)
I was in shock so I just nodded my head.
"Aye ok." He held up his sword and turned round "you heard her lads GIT IM!"
As fast as you could say offski a whole army of feegles charged at Barbossa. A couple of them climbed up Barbossa, who was now running about screaming, wuss, they reached his head and head butted him. He took one look at the little blue dude and fell over.
"Wohoo go blue dudes!" I shouted jumping up and down clapping my hands. Like I said before Barbossa gives me the creeps.
"Aye, but you dun know why yer ere do you?" One of them asked.
"Well, no but I'm just going to go back to my friends now if you don't mind," I said turning around.
"Crivens! NO! You cannea go back mistress they've been turned," he shouted.
"Into what?"
"One of them, mistress, they no longer see what's really there," he said again.
"One of them? Don't see?" These people are more confusing than an upside down back to front road sign.
"Aye, watch this," just then Jez came running into the clearing.
"Jez! Jez! Lookie then Wee Free Men!" I shouted over to her pointing to the group.
"What are you talking about Kaitlyn? There's no one there. It's just sand and grass." She said in a very non-Jezzy way.
"Of course they are look! And there's Barbossa!" I said pointing frantically at the floor. Why can't she see them it's not fair? Well they are tiny and she's like way tall but still why?
"Kaitlyn, are you okay?" She asked me. It was then that it dawned on me.
"Oh my bag of skittles your normal!" I said looking at her in her eyes.
"Why yes Kaitlyn and so will you be in a minute," she said. She took a step back and whistled a very off tune melody that sounded like something George of the Jungle.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"
CRASH!
Elizabeth had swung on a vine and crashed into a tree. Jack who was staggering closely followed her into the clearing.
"Hiya! Kaity -loo the loopy loo! How are you?" He said suppressing a fit of giggles.
"Aye, I told you they had been turned, your only chance is to git acrooos the bridge but . . ." The Nac Mac Feegle paused nervously moving from foot to foot.
"But what?"
"It's made outa plastacine, it might not hold a big job," he said. He better be grateful that I have read the book and know that big job means a normal sized being and not a fat person.
"PLASTACINE!?!" I screamed. I knew this was a suicidal mission.
"Aye!" He said looking down.
"KKKKAAAAAAIIIIIITTTTTTLLLLLYYYYNNNNNN!!!!!" the three 'turned' people started wailing. Their arms where whirling about all over the place and they started to glow yellow then green then blue then . . . well you get the idea.
"You will be turned Kaitlyn," Elizabeth said advancing on me.
"Aye, you will," Jack said. The three closed in on me. I looked around for the Feegles. They had disappeared. Great, I'm going to die what ever I do.
"Eep!"
"Kaitlyn!" What? Now I'm hearing voices in my head?
I decided that the bridge was the better option, as I didn't like the odd colour the others had turned. I turned towards it but to my surprise Will was speeding down the stream in a speedboat with Legolas and Aragorn.
"YIPEE! I'M SAVED! YAY!" I ran towards them and jumped on the boat that had slowed down.
"Do you not know your name?" Legolas asked.
"Well, no!" I said.
"YEEHAAA!" Will shouted from the wheel. "I'm a cowboy now!"
"Yeah right Will, what did Barbossa do to you?" I asked.
"He feed me lots of sugar and sweet things so that I will grow fatter so that he could cook me in his gigantic cooker called the Black Pearl," I said matter-of-factly. Great we have a sugar high blacksmith, a cute elf and a rather annoyed looking ranger.
"DUCK!" Legolas Shouted.
"What where?" I said looking up. Stupid me got the wrong meaning. The boat was going under the bridge. It wouldn't have been that bad if it hadn't turned into wood.
"Ow!" I'm definitely going to end up with brain damage at the end of this. As per usual I knocked myself out.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"How many times does one person need to knock themselves out?" Jack asked Jez as he put Kait down on the sand.
"Erm lets see it's happened about three times now so times that by 456.32 then take 11 you get A LOT!" Jez replied, "Do you think we should throw water on her?"
"She's wet enough," Elizabeth said.
"Okay I'll just poke her then," Jez sat down beside Kait and started poking her side. Just then Kait sat bolt upright banging heads with Jez.
"YOU STUPID POINTY EARED NIDJIT! And ow!" Kait said rubbing her head. "Wait! Where's Legolas and Aragorn and Will and the speed boat and, and the bridge?"
"Erm, Will was captured and Legolas and Aragorn don't belong here." Jez replied.
"Are you Normal?"
"Hell no Kaity loo the Loopy loo."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Yes I know that was a pointless chapter but I really did dream that. I'm also avoiding doing coursework course I really don't want to go back to school. Okay since I start back on Thursday I'm going to try and get the rest of this written on paper but I want you to tell me if you would like a sequel with Jez and Kait so then I can think up ideas Kay? So review my darlings and let me know.
Captain Sophie - Thank you. I'll tell you why, there are very few of us in this world who are crazy sane (that is were crazy is your normal state of mind) we are the normal ones. So if some one looks at you strange when you shout out random words it's because they are insane. Kay? Did that make any sense?
Jlm -of course they like you.
Niccy-b - t'was good and funny? Yay! When are you going to update again?
Raven185 - I updated soon see?
TRANSLATIONS!
Seggittegging beggy egga ceggamp feggiregge - Sitting by a camp fire.
Yegges, beggut yeggoeggu meggust geggo teggo thegge breggidgegge keggaeggitleggyn - yes, but you must go to the bridge Kaitlyn.