A/N-Ok last chapter was so fun for me to write and really easy to write too.  I'm hoping that this chapter will be as good and I'm gonna try to make the last few chapters really long so its not as hard for you guys to let go of this story. lol.  Thanks for reading, please review!!

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Summer Paradise in December

Ch. 19 – Why?

            Marissa finally moved from the spot she had been standing in for about five minutes.  She walked over to the king size bed in the middle of the room, laid down and broke down into tears.  She sobbed for close to twenty minutes when she heard the doorbell ring. 

            "Be right there", Marissa yelled while walking to the bathroom.  She went to the mirror and wiped her eyes as well as she could.  Though they still looked puffy, she went to answer the door anyway.  She opened the door and there standing in front of her was her best friend, Summer Roberts.

            "Hey…Coop", Summer greeted meekly.

            All of a sudden Marissa felt enraged.  For some reason, all of her problems were suddenly Summer's fault.  She felt as if she needed someone to blame her problems on.  And that person was Summer.   

            "Hi Summer", Marissa said in vain.  "Well thanks so much for looking out for me last night.  I mean you could have at least tried to stop me when I decided to go to the bathroom with that guy.  But I guess you wouldn't know how to do that would you?  Seeing as your such a crappy friend!  It's all your fault! We never would have been at that club if you hadn't begged me to help you with your problems and take you out for the night!"

            Summer looked genuinely hurt and like she was about to cry.  "Marissa", Summer began calling her friend by her given and name and not the nickname she usually called her.  "This is so not my fault.  Don't make it seem like we were there because of me.  You were the one that suggested we go there last night.  Yes, I did ask you to help me with Seth, but I did not beg you to take me to that club.  And it's not my fault you were so drunk last night you couldn't even remember that you were in love with the greatest guy on the planet", Summer yelled.  "As for crappy friends, you are the crappy friend for dumping all of your screw ups and problems on me!  Because Coop, what you did last night was no ones fault but your own.  And if you think you're gonna make me feel bad, you've got another thing coming."  With that Summer turned on her heel and stomped back to her room while Marissa slammed the door and sat back down on her bed.

            "I can't believe Coop would just blame me for this", Summer thought to herself.  "I mean yes, I was a little drunk last night, and probably shouldn't have let her go with that guy, but I mean come on, I'm not her mother, nor do I wish to be.  And if I would have asked if we could leave, she would have made a huge scene because she was drunk and everyone knows that no one wants to be told what to do when they're drunk."

            Summer walked across the bridge and re-entered the suite she was sharing with Seth.  She closed the door a little too loudly and accidentally woke Seth up.  He sat up and looked around, his eyes finally falling on Summer.

            "Hey babe", Seth greeted.  "What're you doing up so early?"

            "Oh, I just had to talk to Coop", Summer replied.  "I need to talk to you too actually."

            "Okay, what's up", Seth asked as he sat up in the bed.

"Last night, Coop and I went to this club", Summer began trying to tell the whole truth.  "And we started drinking, maybe a little too much."

Seth nodded his head trying to stay positive, but was beginning to think the worst in his head.

"And I danced with some guys.  But I swear nothing happened.  I swear on my life, that nothing happened", Summer stated seriously.

"Okay", Seth said.  "I'm glad you decided to tell me the truth."  Seth was disappointed that

Summer had been dancing with other guys.  Probably closer than she should have been, but he was glad she had told him and not tried to hide it.  He decided to let it go, because if he didn't it would turn into a huge blowout that they didn't need and would just end up creating more drama.  It was only 8:00 so Summer decided to crawl back into bed with Seth and sleep some more.

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            The two awoke next to each other some time later and it was then that Summer remembered she was going to ask Seth another question earlier.  Summer got up to take a shower because Seth was not up yet.  She stepped out of the shower ten minutes later and decided to put on a watermelon pink Juicy sweat suit over a plain white Gucci tee.  She poured herself some cereal and slowly ate in silence waiting for Seth to wake up. 

Finally around 10:30 Seth stirred and opened his eyes to see Summer looking as beautiful as ever leafing through the hotel activities guide.  Summer glanced up and saw Seth looking at her.  She hopped down from the stool she was occupying and skipped over to Seth giving him a peck on the cheek as she sat down on the bed. 

"Hey, I know you just woke up but I need to talk to you again", Summer stated.

Seth gave her a look that said go ahead. 

Summer continued.  "I know that you said that after everything that's happened you would never be able to fully trust me again", Summer hesitated.  "But it just seems as if you've been pulling away from me lately."

Seth just looked at her for a couple of seconds then he spoke.  "I'm sorry it seems like that, I just don't know how it can ever go back to the way it was.  I mean, Summer, I loved you.  I really loved you.  And I know you said you loved me, but how could this happen if you really did?" Seth said. 

Tears started to well up in Summer's eyes.  She wondered if he was going to break up with her again.  She also wondered how he could say that she hadn't really loved him.  He had no idea.  Summer composed herself and let Seth finish.

"I've forgiven you Summer.  And I want to forget this.  I really do.  But I just don't know that I can", Seth told her.  His voice full of sincerity.  He stared at the floor for a while until he heard Summer sniffling.  Seth looked up and saw tears running down Summer's cheek.  He scooted closer to her and wrapped his arms around her tiny frame.  Summer cried into Seth's shoulder for a few minutes while Seth just held her.  Finally the tears subsided and Seth spoke.  "I love you Summer.  Even after what happened.  And I will continue to love you.  We should start over."

Summer nodded her head and spoke.  "Fine, but none of that cheesy 'Hi, I'm Seth Cohen' crap."

Seth smiled.  There was the Summer he knew and loved.  The cocky, hard ass, 'Don't give me bullshit' Summer.

Seth kissed her gently for a few moments before Summer pulled away.

"I'm hungry again.  Let's get something to eat.  What do you want for lunch Cohen?" Summer asked.          

"Whatever you want my love", Seth answered.

Summer rolled her eyes.  Yep, things were definitely back to normal.

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            Marissa found Ryan sitting by the pool after frantically searching the entire hotel for thirty minutes.  He had his feet dangling in the water.  She sat down next to him and folded her legs Indian style.  Ryan didn't even acknowledge her presence.  Neither spoke, not knowing what to say.  Ryan just drew circles in the water with his feet.  Finally Ryan spoke.  "Why?" he asked simply without looking up from the water as if there were something fascinating lurking beneath the pool's cool blue waters.

            Marissa was silent.  "I'm sorry", she finally said.

            "Sorry doesn't cut it", he said firmly showing absolutely no emotion.

            "I'm sorry", she said again.  "I was drunk and distracted.  It was never the plan for us to go to the club and pick up guys.  I just suggested that Summer and I go out because she feeling bummed about Seth."

            Finally Ryan looked away from the water and turned towards Marissa.  "You can't just keep making up excuses Marissa.  I thought you loved me.  Just goes to show how much I know."  Ryan hardened his voice.  "I thought you quit drinking.  Look what it does to you.  You have a couple drinks and you forget your own name, forget you have a boyfriend, and forget anything else that relates to reality and your life."

            Marissa didn't say anything and it looked as if Ryan were about to cry.  Everything he had had in life had been nothing actually.  He had never had family, money or anyone to love or be loved by.  Then he got taken in by the Cohen's, met Marissa, made some great new friends.  But the one person he had cared about most, Marissa, had been ripped away from him.  He had known it was too good to be true.  Kids from Chino didn't get this lucky.  They didn't get adopted by the wealthiest people in Newport Beach, California, have the opportunity to date the homecoming queen or do any of the other things Ryan had done while living in Newport for the past couple months. 

            "Ryan", Marissa began.

            Ryan cut her off.  "I can't do this now.  After everything I've been through, you've been through.  You're obviously not ready to have a steady boyfriend, quit drinking or do any of the other things you had said you would do.  I don't need anymore drama in my life.  This can't work.  We can't work.  I was fun while it lasted", Ryan said glumly before getting up and walking off towards the bungalow.  He decided he would pack his things seeing as they were leaving early tomorrow morning. 

Marissa just sat on the edge of the pool and sobbed into her hands.  How had things gotten so fucked up?  One minute she and Ryan were happy together the next she was cheating on him and he was breaking up with her.  She deserved it though.  Ryan was right.  He always was.  Alcohol made her do stupid things.  But she couldn't use that as an excuse anymore.  Because it wasn't one.  Finally Marissa left the edge of the pool and ventured towards the beach hoping to forget about Ryan and how she had screwed up her whole life in a matter of hours.

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A/N-Hope you liked that chapter.  The gang is gonna be heading home in the next chap so it will probably be a long chap of them leaving Tahiti and on the plane.  The last chap will be them getting home and a wrap up of the story.  I will tell you this now; Marissa and Ryan will not be back together at the end of the story.  But I think the sequel is gonna be them in college, so expect them to get back together then.  I've had an awesome time writing this story and it will be sad to see it go but as long as there's a sequel then there's nothing to worry about.  lol.  Also, one question for the sequel, since they're gonna be in college, what college do you want them to go to.  East coast, west coast.  Give me your input.  Thanks!  And don't forget to review.