Psychedelic Hollow
Conclusion
itsmeocean@hotmail.com
"Thanks, man, for this impromptu farewell." Conrad raised his beer can and toasted Frank. Frank gazed out into the open sea from where he and Conrad were sitting, up on top Angela's Cliff. Far away, he could make out the scattered dots of lights from downtown Bayport which was just a little beyond the pitch black sea. Dark waters below, the velvet sky above, he felt a little alone as the refrain of some sad song replayed over and over again in his head.
For the past couple of days, Joe had been in the dumps because of the case and Frank did his best to cheer his brother up in between counseling Conrad and calling people he invited to the wedding to inform them that it was cancelled. Joe wanted to help but Frank thought it was best if he did it himself- he did let Joe call Elle though. He was rather wary of the sharp-tongued lady.
Now that Joe was back to his normal self, he could let go of some of the detachedness and feel a little- just a little. Not too much though. He needed energy now for other matters- making sure Conrad was okay, settling things between him and Nancy and of course, Callie. But for now, he could take a moment and respectfully mourn Kimberly, Justin and Colin- the three young souls, wasted away by bad luck, moments of foolishness and, perhaps, some shared alienation from the rest of humanity and even those they loved.
Besides, if he felt too much, everything he sought to shelve away would come tumbling out of their bursting cupboards- his old cases, the 'Perfect Crime', the lost innocence. Ah, to be a quarter of a century old and wading through some of the most perverse secrets of the human hearts was no easy task but that was what his job demanded.
He gulped down the rest of his beer and crushed the can, setting in on the ground before picking up the next one and pulling off the tab, "Hot night."
"Yah." Conrad muttered. Frank caught the sparkle of Bayport City in his friend's dark eyes. Conrad, having lived his whole life in Bayport, was admiring the view atop Angela's Cliff for one final time.
"Decided?"
"Nothing's left here for me anymore. My brother's dead, my mom's dead and my dad's in Riker's… I think this place has enough awful memories."
"So where are you going?"
"Someplace where no one knows my name." Conrad smiled at Frank poignantly, "Where I can start all over again. Maybe settle down, have a family and name my first boy, Justin."
Frank sipped the cold, creamy beer, a soothing treat on that humid night, "Sounds good. Take it easy, man."
"I'm cool. Not going to jump off here or anything. Pity about Colin though. I should hate him, you know, for what he planned to do to Justin and then how he refused to take the blame… but I don't. In a way, I think Justin and Colin are pretty much the same creatures inside. I just wish both of them are in a nice place now without the mysterious troubles that plagued their minds when they were alive." Conrad flattened his can and lay it beside the previous two that he already had, "That's my last one… and I mean it. Last one."
"Good."
"You're on your third can too."
"Astute." Frank said with a mirthless laugh, "Don't worry. I don't plan on driving."
"Listen, man… I know somehow this case caused you and your fiancée to break up. Whatever it is, I'm sorry. But I think if you love the girl, you should go after her and not sit up here with your miserable friend, drinking cans of beer and doing nothing, you know. I spent a lot of my time doing nothing, so did Justin. And it's pretty wasteful." Conrad draped an arm across Frank's shoulders, "Pretty wasteful."
Frank shoved his hand into his pants' pocket and felt the ring box with the ring that his father wanted him to put on Callie's finger. To put in his whole heart into chasing after his happiness- the truth was, after all that had happened, was he still able to give Callie unsullied peace and joy? Did he deserve her?
He set down his half-full can and smiled at Conrad gratefully, "Yup, pretty wasteful."
***
Joe slammed the boot shut and clapped his hands clean of the dust which had gathered on the rented car. Nancy was inside, studying the road map intently under the weak orange light, chewing on one end of a pen. She was heading to New York where she could assist in the Rofomyn case of which her part was actually fulfilled. Joe paused for a second to admire the view before slipping inside the car. Yes, she was really adorable now, looking like one of those pretty girls in the library conscientiously mulling over her books.
"All in." He climbed into the passenger seat and peered over the town map, "Aw, it isn't that hard to find your way from Bayport to New York City. Anyway, while I don't want to sound like some nagging old man, you should drive in the morning, the visual is better and it's safer."
"I'll be fine." Nancy muttered carelessly before dumping the map on his lap, "I want to go for coffee first. Want to join me?"
"Don't you want to wait for Frank?" Joe asked, "I think he'll like to bid farewell to you."
"He's not coming. I didn't tell him I'm leaving. I only told you."
"Oh…" Joe scratched his head and smiled sheepishly, "I thought you forgotten about me since you informed me like two hours ago."
"It's a rush-rush thing. They called me and told me to cut short my happy time." Nancy smiled at him, "I will love to stay for a few days more since I remembered someone telling me that he would like to show me around."
On impulse, knowing very well that the history between Nancy and Frank would make any kind of serious relationship between him and Nancy awkward, Joe took Nancy's right hand and clasped it tightly, "I can show you some pretty amazing sights in two hours, if you'll spare me that. Seeing it's close to dinner time and you'll want to eat too, I know a great place, just two streets away, that we can go to."
"Are you flirting with me, Hardy?"
"Only if you want me to, Drew." Joe winked at her and she laughed lightly, snatching her hand away. Remembering the awesome kiss which was heart-flutteringly incredible right up to the point when they were caught by Frank, Joe was caught between loyalty to his brother and wanting to just see if there was anything more besides the almost harmless flirting and teasing. From the corner of his eyes, he saw Nancy smiled softly to herself, probably thinking of the same thing too.
But she was most likely still in love with Frank and her heart still broken. If anything was to happen, he would be, at best, a substitute. And it would strain the relationship between him and Frank. Not worth it at all.
Why am I feeling this way? Joe growled inwardly, Why must she suddenly seem so pretty to my eyes?
I'm just a big, bad flirt…
Clearing his throat, Joe stared at his knees, suddenly very shy, "I, ahm, I can drive you to New York City… we can take turns. It'll be fun and… and well, I can do some… ahm, shopping for stuff… manly stuff, I mean…razors, blades…frozen chicken…"
Nancy patted his shoulder and he turned to look at her. They stared at each other for the longest time before bursting out laughing together.
"It wouldn't work." Nancy spoke first and Joe nodded in acquisition.
"Right, it will never work."
"Not in a million years."
"Not in a million, gazillion, million gazillion years."
"Never, ever, never."
"Never."
Nancy let out a huge sigh and turned away, "I feel terrible for the mess I made. Frank absolved me somewhat but…. I should have moved on earlier, you know. I woke up this morning and it hits me. I was devastated that he didn't choose me but not as shattered as I think I would be. I guess it was an answer I wanted, but it doesn't mean I'm necessarily in love with him still. Looking back, I'm not even sure…maybe it was the sense of injustice and being rejected which boiled such strong emotions in me… You think Callie will forgive him?"
Joe shrugged, "I don't know. He hadn't the courage to face her yet."
"This is what happens when we are too attached to the past. Somehow, we fail to see the opportunities in the future. I think I have just ruined one." Nancy gazed at him weirdly. Joe looked away- the tension between the both of them was too overbearing- guilt, excitement, fear and anticipated exhilaration rumbled in his stomach. But he knew whatever it was, it definitely wasn't love.
And right then, Frank was more important. There were many girls out there but he had only one beloved brother.
"Never, ever, never." Nancy repeated before Joe could express similar views, "But dinner sounds good."
Never. But a little flirting doesn't hurt…
He grinned at her, at peace with the decision, "Sounds good to me too."
***
A few hours ago, the night had been unbearably hot. But the weather was the most unpredictable force in Bayport, especially in the days when it couldn't decide to remain in summer or move on to autumn. The sky had been pouring with no signs of letting up. Joe too was in a dilemma. He wanted to throw open his windows and enjoy the cool air but it brought in the rain to wet his furniture as well and if he closed them all, it would be too stuffy to sleep. Defeated by indecisions, he trotted downstairs for a glass of warm milk and wee morning television. The dinner with Nancy had already digested and his stomach was growling. As he warmed the milk, and allowed the silence to settle around him, he thought he heard some pretty, out of tune slurry singing from the backyard.
"Yesterday……..
All my troubles seemed so FAR away
Now it looks as thought they're here to STAY
Oh I be-eee in yesterDAEEEEEEEE……"
Oh no…
He threw the kitchen's door opened. There Frank was on the ground, his back against the wall just beside the door and his legs sprawled vulgarly. Singing, or rather, shouting hoarsely to the sky, drinking rain-contaminated beer, he seemed to be enjoying the company of misery with the rain soaking through his clothes and into his bones.
"YEETERDAE!!!!!!!"
"Shh! Frank!" Joe hovered over his brother and tried to wrestle the beer can out of Frank's hand, "We have to go in! You'll fall sick like this!"
"Donch care! Wanna beeeeer…." Frank drawled, weakly resisting Joe's attempt. His grip came loose and Joe flung the can far away into the backyard, "Hey…"
"Hey you back! You'll wake mom, dad, Aunt Gertrude and there'll be hell." He hunched over and lifted Frank up from under the armpits, wrinkling his nose at the same time. Frank stunk of alcohol and vomit.
"I can stand…" Frank muttered as he pushed Joe away, "Sheee… I am standing…"
"Good, now, let's go in…" Joe supported wobbly Frank and tried to steer Frank towards the door. Sheesh, his brother was heavier than he remembered. 6 feet 1 of lean, dense muscles. Frank turned around, suddenly growing anxious. He broke away from Joe and ran out into the backyard, slowly circling in one spot, looking like he was close to tears.
"My brelly…I wanna my brelly…where's my brelly? Wanna my brelleee…"
"Brelly?" Joe ran out into the rain, hoping to drag Frank back to the house as quick as possible, "Oh… I see an umbrella. You mean brolly?"
Frank nodded, gazing into empty space miserably, "Brelly."
"I'll go get it… you stay here for just one second." Joe hurriedly walked over to the overturned golf umbrella. He drained the water and closed it before jogging back to Frank and returning it to his outstretched hand.
Frank took the umbrella and cuddled it happily, "My brelly…"
"Good, now we're going back."
"Don't take my brelly!" He glared at Joe, "Don't take it!"
"I won't. Can we go back now?" Joe draped an arm across Frank's shoulders and practically pushed him towards the door. Frank dropped the umbrella and stopped dead in his tracks. He turned around and gazed at Joe hauntingly.
"She's not coming back to me, you know?"
"Frank…" Joe gripped Frank's shoulders and squeezed them reassuringly, hoping to settle it quick so they could get back inside and dry up. "It's all right. Just go back in, have a good rest and we'll talk tomorrow, okay?"
"Callie's not coming back. Joe thinks I'm some heartless jerk and Nancy hates me. I'm such a loser." Frank hung his head low, a sorry sight compared to his usual quiet confidence. Joe felt a prick of guilt, knowing that whatever pushed Frank to drink like that wasn't just Callie alone. He probably carried too much weight onto his heart and now, it was shattered and he didn't know where to find support.
He hugged his brother and patted him calmingly on the back.
"It's okay… Joe doesn't think you're some heartless jerk. Joe just misunderstood…"
*"I'm going to hell too. I shot him." Frank pulled away and burst out crying, waving his hands about "He shot my arm. No one could stop him. He was going to shoot the little boy. But I shot him and so he can't shoot the boy. Bang! He died… I shot him…and they said I'm some hero…"
"Frank…" Joe wasn't prepared for the admission- he gathered that Frank had underwent some sort of trial by fire during his solo run-in with a psychopath in Bayport some years back but he didn't know just how demanding the case was on Frank.
And he didn't know what to say. He wished he had stayed on the phone longer, he wished he had asked some concern questions instead of hastily congratulating Frank on the success of his case and saying goodbyes.
"I shot him! And now, I'm not getting married, my brother hates me and everything is crumbling to dust in my hands… I'm going to hell. I'm not happy…" Frank moaned, burying his face in his hands, "I'm not feeling very well..."
Joe pulled Frank back in an embrace again, his own eyes welling up. How could he just think about his own happiness, his own displeasure with Frank and how he didn't like the changes in Frank without even bothering to stand on Frank's side and try to understand?
All along, Frank had protected him and coddled him. The couple of days following Justin's death, he had shuttled in between checking on Conrad, checking in on Joe and dealing with his cancelled wedding. And him? He took a couple of days off to be gloomy.
All along, he had thought he was the only one besotted with troubles, the only one needing everyone around him to show him affection and love. He was the one who couldn't work effectively for his client's best interest when hit with setbacks and he dared blame Frank for being too good in his job! He was the selfish one!
"It's okay, big brother. I'm here. We'll go in and I'll take care of you. You're going to be all right." Joe soothed his sobbing brother. In the rain, he stood with Frank, letting him cry out his demons as he vowed to annihilate each and everyone of them.
In the rain, he held his brother and let him cry.
***
"Callie! Please! I just need to talk to you!"
"Shut up, jerk! People are trying to sleep!" Callie's neighbor, a pimply-face man, yelled out from his window. Frank ignored him and continued calling out for his one true love from across the small lane. He could see Callie's shadow from behind her thin, lacy curtains. What he wouldn't do to just be in her pink, cozy room again, lazing next to her on some sleepy afternoon as she tried to read some novel.
And what he wouldn't do to just hold her and nuzzle her hair, breathing in the scent of sweet, calming lavender mingled with her natural aroma.
"Callie!"
She had paused and was probably in a dilemma. The rain pelted into his eyes and he rubbed at them, trying to catch a better glimpse of her figure- those amazing curves in between girlishness and womanhood. Finally, the curtains parted and she glanced outside before shutting them again.
"Callie, please! Just a second! It has always been you! Always! I love you, Callie Shaw!"
"I said shut up!" The man from next door threw a spit bomb down at Frank who deftly jumped out of the way.
Her figure disappeared from the window and he knew she was coming down. He knew she couldn't bear to see him catch a chill- times of how she fussed over him when he went to her house after a game of soccer in the rain coursed through his veins an undulating ache. She appeared with a towel and an umbrella. His heart soared. She was going to give him a second chance!
"Callie, listen…" He gushed as she held on to the umbrella with one hand and with the other, tried to dry his hair. He grabbed her towel hand and gazed deep into those beautiful hazel-brown eyes. Callie, his love… how could he had been so blind and deaf to the angel right before him then? His heart twisted as she looked away from him, dropping the towel to the ground.
"I love you, darling… please, look at me…We don't have to get married or anything. We can take baby-steps. I'm willing to do anything, anything at all, just to have you forgive me and smile once again."
She looked up at him finally, her eyes brimming over and her lips quavering. He bent over slightly, wanting to kiss the top of her nose when she whispered brokenly, passing the handle of the umbrella into his hands.
"Go home, Frank. It's over."
-The End-
Song butchered by Frank: "Yesterday" in Help! by The Beatles. Recorded in 14 June 1965
*To be further explored in an upcoming Frank-solo story. Glimpses into this story is peppered in Homecoming as well.