A/N: this is an outtake from 'Hanging by a moment' so I think you go should read that first, if you haven't read it cos otherwise you won't know what I'm on about. During 'Hanging' I was asked a lot of times when I'll bring Ryo's fiancé into the story. Well here she is (sort of). I haven't bashed her up, so if you were hoping for that you're highly disappointed. She gets mentioned a couple of time in this one-shot, cos it'd be mean if I created her but didn't give her any limelight at all.
After I first wrote this, I became disappointed because no one reviewed. Ok, I thought, it was too short. It needed more texture. Better narration. So I deleted the whole thing, re-wrote it, got it beta-ed and viola. The new, better version for Metaphors and antonyms. And then I thought, no. It needs a better title. So I changed the title, and now it is what it is. So R&R and I know it'll be worth my effort. Arigatou!!
Timeline: set somewhere between the last chapter and the epilogue.
Disclaimer: Not mine. FAKE belongs to Sanami Matoh. Lyrics are neither mine.
Meant to Live
"Dreaming
about providence
And whether mice or men have second tries
Maybe we've been living with our eyes half open
Maybe we're bent and broken, broken"
-- Switchfoot, Meant to Live
A pale moon rises silently up like a balloon among the sea of black. Silver lights pierce though the curtains, like daggers to skin. The rain is strumming steadily outside, the watery patterns reflecting off the wall.
The bed is falling apart; the rooms are always too still, each day comes and goes without a single change in my new life. Our legs tangled together, fingers joined under the sheets, her breath hot and thick in my ear every night. Bikky had never says anything about my relationship with her nowadays. He doesn't care, doesn't comment, doesn't criticize. Secretly I know he is mad at me since our last meeting, angry at me for running away.
I play our conversation bit by bit, like film clip, reciting and repeating every sound and movement, as if afraid to forget. A sound clip glued to my mind, the images haunting my every day and night, lengthening them by several hours, and always I find myself asking the same questions.
What do you want from me? What did I want from you? Your care, your love, your attention? No, neither of these things would mean anything me. All I would need was you yourself. That soul, that heart that body, it was all I ever wanted.
There are so many things I want to know, but I'm afraid of the answer.
How are you now? Do you miss me? Do you think of me at all? I missed you, Dee, come back, come to my side again, forgive me for being an idiot, don't leave, don't leave me alone again. The words melt in my mouth in every phone call; I can't utter the sounds and the phrases in any way, the thought slipping like evening rain onto the blank glass. Instead I go on about the clutter in life, things you don't need to know about, the small chit-chat like two old friends catching up to each other.
It's too late to do anything now, and even though I try, I fail without mercy. Destiny doesn't spare a glance, not anymore, my time had come and gone, and this was the punishment for being a coward.
I'm sorry Dee, so sorry.
*OWARI*
A/N: WELL?! I really hope you review this time, cos it hurts to see a blank review board. ;_; flames welcome.