[Summary: UH OH!! Shinji lost the strategy guide!!! Guess who has it.....]
========
This fic is funny.
OK, a few people have asked and here is the explanation. "Fonz" (also Fonzie), is a character from a 70's television show called "Happy Days". His trademark is when he goes "aaaaaay" and gives a thumbs up(sometimes two). And as far as this fic goes...hes dead.
(google image "fonz" for looks)
I have, If you may, a small rant. If theres anything I hate, its the word "HUGGLES". And "THANKIES" and just about ANY WORD modified to make it sound cuter. If I hear anyone use that word again, Ill beat them to death with my cat. And believe me. He likes it more than you think.
Also, I don't like this "^_^" thing. IT FREAKIN' GETS ON MY NEVRES...but not much...so...whatever.
You know the drill, I don't own the stuff I don't own, Ok? And if you don't like it. Here's what you do:
1.Take this fan fiction
2.Shine it up real nice
3.Turn it side ways
4.AND STICK IT...in a 6x8 envelope addressed to me, including at most 10 things you dont like about it, and why.
Thank you.
[Should be interesting]
========
It's been hard on everyone so far. Gendou, having revealed to everyone thats he's acually a Scott and having destroyed 3 crimes against nature, Ritsuko Feeling the pressure of having to do the Brain Damaged Maya's work and now the Insane Misato in addition to her own, Kaji, sick of not getting any show time decided to start a drug trafficing operation in the basement. Shinji, having finally been removed from the EVA went back into character(whiny, apologetic, wimpoguy) after Asuka threatened to rape him into obilvion.
Now, we see Gendou settling back to a bowl/plate/stick/cup/helping of good ole' homemade haggas(btw haggas is boiled sheep intestines. Yum).
Gendou, halfway through a haggas:...ugh...it tastes so bad...AND YET I CAN'T STOP!*scarf gnarf much* Wait...I got it!!
On that exclamation, and without swallowing his mouth full of sheep guts, Gendou exited his office...eventually, that place is big.
Ritsuko is hard working and a brilliant person, but even she can't do the work of three people for long... ever since she hit Maya in the head with a sledgehammer, Maya lost the ability to do pretty much anything right, especially her job. Since this was Ritsuko's fault, she took on Maya's job as well as her own out of guilt as well as to justify stealing Maya's paychecks.
Maya's condition only got worse...Her talk only became more unintelligeble, and her behavior oddened(is that even a word?).
Maya: |_||\|.-34|_ 70.-|\|4|\/|3|\|7 2004 .-|_||_32!!!!!121one [Translation (You'll need it): This Unreal Tornament Game is addictive!]
Game: "Die B--h!" *BOOM* *zooong* "You are the champion."
Maya: |\|/|\|3|)!!!!!!! [I beat them!! Hurrah!!]
Ritsuko: MAYA!!! KEEP IT DOWN!!!! Between that game saying "die b-tch" and your AND Misato's workload, I don't think I can get through the day unless I have absolute...
Gendou: AHEM.
Ritsuko: ...eep
Regardless of past...incidents..., Gendou still commanded alot of respect from Nerv. He had 100 N2-Bombs in his basement, And he blows up stuff on a whim. They kinda had no choice.
[Flash Back]
Paper boy: Mr.Ikari, its the end of the month...it's time to pay for you subscription.
Gendou: No.
Paper boy: But...
**BOOM**
[And yet another time....]
Shinji, 4 years old: Dady...help me with my math homework...
**Faint-ish in explosion in the distance**
Gendou: Now you'll never have to do homework again....MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!
Shinji, crying: Daddy...you're scaring me!*sniff*
Gendou:...is that so? *Gendou Slaps shinji, but thats another story*
[Another Time, Nerv Germany]
Some Guy: IKARI!!! We've got reports of high nuclear activity in the ocean ...you wouldn't happen to be playing Battleship with my FLEET, AGAIN?!?!?
Gendou: Pfft, I was bored.
*BOOM*
Some Guy: You sunk my Battleships!!!!
[Flashback over]
Gendou: May I have your attention all.
Now Ritsuko doesn't usually go "eep", but you would if you saw Gendou decked out in complete scottish duds(complete with kilt!) and a bagpipe on his shoulder. Gendou was just about to play a little irish ditty...
Ritsuko: Sir, please...im swamped in work...I REALLY...
Gendou: Fine. Youll find a little...BONUS... in your mail tommorrow...MWHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH....
Ritsuko, sweating nervously: Uhh...sir...on second thought....
Gendou:....ahahahahahah....*fart*...ahahhaahha!!
Ritsuko:...uhoh.
[Tommorrow Morning]
Ritsuko, opening her mail: Uh oh...this one is from Gendou...
"I told you i'd give you a bonus...AND HERE IT IS!!!!! MWHAHAHAHHA!!!! *fart* OOCH AYE!"
Ritsuko:...*sigh* oh boy.....
And then, "50 cents of third ice cream cone purchase" coupon falls out of the envelope.
Ritsuko:Hmm...he...seems to have lost his touch, amoung other things... And he's become a cheapskate, too.
[Back to Yesterday]
Gendou:.....HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!
Ritsuko:...ugh, im dead....
Game: ***BOOM*** Die bi--h!
[MEANWHILE!!1112@one]
Asuka: SHINJI, YOU IDIOT!!
Shinji:...Im sorry...
Asuka: HOW COULD YOU DO THIS!!?!?
Shinji:...Im...sorry, it was an accident...Im sorry...
Asuka:...I outta have my way with you...
Shinji, sacastically: No, please don't.
Asuka in a rage, kicks Shinji in the groin. Shinji keels over in pain, allowing Asuka to proceed to sodomi-- err kick Shinji in the head. WHERE IS MY MAGIC STRATEGY GUIDE WHEN I NEED IT!?
[In Gendou's Office]
Gendou, smiling meanacingly:...MHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHHAAHHAAH...*gasp*...MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH*you get the idea*
Gendou: Time to try out on of these puppies.
[In the main control room]
Ritsuko:...hmmm...France just disappeared from the map.
Then Gendou ran in franctically screaming:
Gendou: IT WORKS!! IT WORKS!! INFINITE N2 BOMBS!!!!
Ritsuko: ...oh dear god.
[Basement]
Kaji: There is a disturbance in the force...
END!
Disclaimer: Too many ...silence dots....dying of...dot...overdose...*dies* Shinji died after that brief assualt by Asuka. Ristuko shot Maya in the head after hearing "DIE B-TCH!" 289 times. She then used a serum to revive Shinji after she found Asuka kicking his dead corspe. Shinji, after being revived, complained how that was the happiest he's ever been since that night a russian hooker mistook him for his dad. He then jumped out of the adjacent window. The adjacent GROUND FLOOR window. Asuka Laughed, Ritsuko sighed, and Shinji cried.
***That is all.***
NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA BAAAAAATMAAAAAAN!!!!
So you like? Review. Don't like? Review.
If I get good one's Ill make more. And if I don't... I'll list your e-mail address in every porno site on the internet. I should be done in the year 10,000 if I start now.
[Just Sayin']
========
This fic is funny.
OK, a few people have asked and here is the explanation. "Fonz" (also Fonzie), is a character from a 70's television show called "Happy Days". His trademark is when he goes "aaaaaay" and gives a thumbs up(sometimes two). And as far as this fic goes...hes dead.
(google image "fonz" for looks)
I have, If you may, a small rant. If theres anything I hate, its the word "HUGGLES". And "THANKIES" and just about ANY WORD modified to make it sound cuter. If I hear anyone use that word again, Ill beat them to death with my cat. And believe me. He likes it more than you think.
Also, I don't like this "^_^" thing. IT FREAKIN' GETS ON MY NEVRES...but not much...so...whatever.
You know the drill, I don't own the stuff I don't own, Ok? And if you don't like it. Here's what you do:
1.Take this fan fiction
2.Shine it up real nice
3.Turn it side ways
4.AND STICK IT...in a 6x8 envelope addressed to me, including at most 10 things you dont like about it, and why.
Thank you.
[Should be interesting]
========
It's been hard on everyone so far. Gendou, having revealed to everyone thats he's acually a Scott and having destroyed 3 crimes against nature, Ritsuko Feeling the pressure of having to do the Brain Damaged Maya's work and now the Insane Misato in addition to her own, Kaji, sick of not getting any show time decided to start a drug trafficing operation in the basement. Shinji, having finally been removed from the EVA went back into character(whiny, apologetic, wimpoguy) after Asuka threatened to rape him into obilvion.
Now, we see Gendou settling back to a bowl/plate/stick/cup/helping of good ole' homemade haggas(btw haggas is boiled sheep intestines. Yum).
Gendou, halfway through a haggas:...ugh...it tastes so bad...AND YET I CAN'T STOP!*scarf gnarf much* Wait...I got it!!
On that exclamation, and without swallowing his mouth full of sheep guts, Gendou exited his office...eventually, that place is big.
Ritsuko is hard working and a brilliant person, but even she can't do the work of three people for long... ever since she hit Maya in the head with a sledgehammer, Maya lost the ability to do pretty much anything right, especially her job. Since this was Ritsuko's fault, she took on Maya's job as well as her own out of guilt as well as to justify stealing Maya's paychecks.
Maya's condition only got worse...Her talk only became more unintelligeble, and her behavior oddened(is that even a word?).
Maya: |_||\|.-34|_ 70.-|\|4|\/|3|\|7 2004 .-|_||_32!!!!!121one [Translation (You'll need it): This Unreal Tornament Game is addictive!]
Game: "Die B--h!" *BOOM* *zooong* "You are the champion."
Maya: |\|/|\|3|)!!!!!!! [I beat them!! Hurrah!!]
Ritsuko: MAYA!!! KEEP IT DOWN!!!! Between that game saying "die b-tch" and your AND Misato's workload, I don't think I can get through the day unless I have absolute...
Gendou: AHEM.
Ritsuko: ...eep
Regardless of past...incidents..., Gendou still commanded alot of respect from Nerv. He had 100 N2-Bombs in his basement, And he blows up stuff on a whim. They kinda had no choice.
[Flash Back]
Paper boy: Mr.Ikari, its the end of the month...it's time to pay for you subscription.
Gendou: No.
Paper boy: But...
**BOOM**
[And yet another time....]
Shinji, 4 years old: Dady...help me with my math homework...
**Faint-ish in explosion in the distance**
Gendou: Now you'll never have to do homework again....MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!
Shinji, crying: Daddy...you're scaring me!*sniff*
Gendou:...is that so? *Gendou Slaps shinji, but thats another story*
[Another Time, Nerv Germany]
Some Guy: IKARI!!! We've got reports of high nuclear activity in the ocean ...you wouldn't happen to be playing Battleship with my FLEET, AGAIN?!?!?
Gendou: Pfft, I was bored.
*BOOM*
Some Guy: You sunk my Battleships!!!!
[Flashback over]
Gendou: May I have your attention all.
Now Ritsuko doesn't usually go "eep", but you would if you saw Gendou decked out in complete scottish duds(complete with kilt!) and a bagpipe on his shoulder. Gendou was just about to play a little irish ditty...
Ritsuko: Sir, please...im swamped in work...I REALLY...
Gendou: Fine. Youll find a little...BONUS... in your mail tommorrow...MWHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH....
Ritsuko, sweating nervously: Uhh...sir...on second thought....
Gendou:....ahahahahahah....*fart*...ahahhaahha!!
Ritsuko:...uhoh.
[Tommorrow Morning]
Ritsuko, opening her mail: Uh oh...this one is from Gendou...
"I told you i'd give you a bonus...AND HERE IT IS!!!!! MWHAHAHAHHA!!!! *fart* OOCH AYE!"
Ritsuko:...*sigh* oh boy.....
And then, "50 cents of third ice cream cone purchase" coupon falls out of the envelope.
Ritsuko:Hmm...he...seems to have lost his touch, amoung other things... And he's become a cheapskate, too.
[Back to Yesterday]
Gendou:.....HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!
Ritsuko:...ugh, im dead....
Game: ***BOOM*** Die bi--h!
[MEANWHILE!!1112@one]
Asuka: SHINJI, YOU IDIOT!!
Shinji:...Im sorry...
Asuka: HOW COULD YOU DO THIS!!?!?
Shinji:...Im...sorry, it was an accident...Im sorry...
Asuka:...I outta have my way with you...
Shinji, sacastically: No, please don't.
Asuka in a rage, kicks Shinji in the groin. Shinji keels over in pain, allowing Asuka to proceed to sodomi-- err kick Shinji in the head. WHERE IS MY MAGIC STRATEGY GUIDE WHEN I NEED IT!?
[In Gendou's Office]
Gendou, smiling meanacingly:...MHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHHAAHHAAH...*gasp*...MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH*you get the idea*
Gendou: Time to try out on of these puppies.
[In the main control room]
Ritsuko:...hmmm...France just disappeared from the map.
Then Gendou ran in franctically screaming:
Gendou: IT WORKS!! IT WORKS!! INFINITE N2 BOMBS!!!!
Ritsuko: ...oh dear god.
[Basement]
Kaji: There is a disturbance in the force...
END!
Disclaimer: Too many ...silence dots....dying of...dot...overdose...*dies* Shinji died after that brief assualt by Asuka. Ristuko shot Maya in the head after hearing "DIE B-TCH!" 289 times. She then used a serum to revive Shinji after she found Asuka kicking his dead corspe. Shinji, after being revived, complained how that was the happiest he's ever been since that night a russian hooker mistook him for his dad. He then jumped out of the adjacent window. The adjacent GROUND FLOOR window. Asuka Laughed, Ritsuko sighed, and Shinji cried.
***That is all.***
NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA BAAAAAATMAAAAAAN!!!!
So you like? Review. Don't like? Review.
If I get good one's Ill make more. And if I don't... I'll list your e-mail address in every porno site on the internet. I should be done in the year 10,000 if I start now.
[Just Sayin']