Greetings all fanfic readers!!! In all honesty, I think that the last chapter sucked. I dislike it with a great passion, but it had to be done. I promise to try a lot harder on this chapter. Just so you know, this story has nothing to do with 101 Dalmatians. I've always wanted a Dalmatian so I gave Mona and Draco one. So let's stop talking about it and actually start it.
Disclaimer- Guess what? I'm not JKR!!! Wow, aren't you surprised?!
Chapter 5 Hell No, H2O
The rest of the weekend went by fast for Mona. The coyotes came over the next day to practice and they called Wyllie to tell her about it. She loved the idea and also showed up on Mona's doorstep. Wyllie was a little scared when everyone answered the door with random items in their hands like baseball bats and frying pans. To their great delight, Malfoy had stayed home that day obviously not wanting to go deaf. Monday finally came. It was Mona's cleaning day. Her house had become extremely messy from all of the company that she had. Mona was in her living room vacuuming and singing when the doorbell rang.
Aint it funny how some feelings you just can't deny And you can't move on even though you tryAint it strange when you're feeling things you shouldn't feel
Oh, I wish this could be real
Aint it funny how a moment can just change your life
And you don't want to face what's wrong or right
Aint it strange how fate can play a part
In the story of your heart
Mona turned off the vacuum and opened the door. Perdy went mad when she saw who it was. Pongo was standing there with his owner, Draco.
"Hello again. Miss me?" he said smirking like he always did.
"No not at all! What are you, my stalker? If you're going to be here so much I might as well just give you a spare key so I don't have to keep opening the door. So what do you want now?" she asked giving Draco death glares.
"What? Can't a stalker stop by to stalk the stalkee?" he asked.
"Please Malfoy. I have a lot of cleaning to do and I have to work tonight so let's make this quick. First you insult me. Then I insult you. We'll make a few sarcastic remarks back and forth. You'll bombard me with questions. Finally, I'll get so sick of you that I'll kick you out. Alright, you start."
"Are you keeping records of these things? God, I could never remember all of that. Anyway, the really reason I came here was to ask you to dinner. That way I can ask you all the questions I want and eat at the same time. It's a win win situation."
"You must be joking! There's no way in hell that I'm going to date you! God, all of that screaming last night must've gone to your head big time…" she said shaking her head.
"I'm not joking and yes, that screaming could've woken every single person within a hundred miles. I bet people in London could here it. Look, just give me chance. I only want to talk." He said. Something about him made her want to give in, but she quickly got rid of the idea. She looked into his eyes. They were exactly what she saw in her dreams only in real life.
"No, I'm sorry, but right now, all I want to do is finish cleaning and go to work. You didn't even follow the conversation that we usually share. Good-bye Malfoy." She said quietly as she closed the door. Her stomach gave a huge lurch. It was those eyes. You could easily get lost in them and never return. Mona abandoned her vacuum cleaner and ran upstairs and cried for a while.
Meanwhile, Perdy stood up on the couch looking at Draco and Pongo walk away. Pongo looked back at Perdy with sadness in his eyes. Perdy whimpered a little as she watched them leave.
Mona cried for a while longer before she realized that it was five and she needed to get finished with her work and get ready. After finishing the vacuuming and promising to finish tomorrow, Mona went back upstairs to change. She picked out a top that looked like leopard skin, but it wasn't. It was a no sleeved shirt that was raised just enough to see her stomach. She pulled on a tight pair of pants and began to fix her hair. Since she had a perm, there wasn't much to do, but make sure that it was still curly. She let her long curls go. They reached down to her shoulders and came to a stop. Mona smiled at her reflection as she began to do her make-up. Once she was done, she locked up the house and jumped on her motorcycle. She arrived at the bar at seven where she met Megan outside.
"Hello! Ready for a fun night. The crowd is going to go crazy tonight! Are you ready to sing?" she asked excitedly.
"Hell yeah!! Let's get this party started!" she answered just as excited.
"By the way, how's your stalker? Is he still around hiding in the bushes? Make sure you close the shades when you take a shower." Said Megan as she began to laugh a little.
"He showed up again. He asked me out to dinner. I was so shocked."
"Did you accept?"
"No of course not! It takes more than stalking me to get me to date someone. I'm not that shallow." Said Mona as she turned to go inside. Megan stayed outside where she met with Chelsea and Taylor. Kristina and Wyllie were already in getting the drinks ready. They talked for a while, then seven 'o clock came and it was time to start. The old men came in and took their usual positions at the bar. Mona hated this part because they always tried to flirt with her and the other coyotes. It was worse when they were drunk. Luckily, by the time they were, the younger men had arrived. It was midnight when someone walked in the bar and sat right in front of Mona.
"Fire whiskey please." He said. Mona looked up and rolled her eyes.
"Not you again. Can't you take a hint? Did you loose all of your smartness after we left Hogwarts? I would've thought that you knew when you weren't wanted. Plus, we don't serve fire whisky. It's too wimpy. You won't find it any where near this part of Chicago." She said.
"I can take a hint, Cambell. I just choose not to. Why won't you go to dinner with me? It's not like we're marrying or something. C'mon, it's only one little date."
"No way, Malfoy. I have way too much stuff to do. Besides, I sleep until noon, and I never date on the weekends because I leave my house at seven. There's no time for a proper date." She said as she began to clean some other glasses.
"Yeah, I'm sure you're really busy. What, do you have to read through all of the libraries in Chicago before winter? I sure wouldn't want to interrupt that." He said sarcastically.
"I haven't been to a library since… well, I don't know…" she said.
"Hmmm… short term memory too. I think all of this bar dancing is getting to you. Maybe you should lay off the beer a little." He said smirking.
"Okay, so let me get this straight. You ask me out, and then you insult me to death. Am I the only one who thinks that this is completely stupid and pointless?"
"Hey I can't help it. You were always the easiest to insult." He teased.
"Gee thanks Malfoy. Are you going to order something or not? I do have other things to do than standing here listening to your small talk."
"Your quite welcome and I think I'll just have a glass of water. You've probably put poison in the beer or something." He said smirking. That made Mona go crazy. Then she smirked herself.
"No problem Malfoy." She said still smirking as she reached under the bar for something.
"What's this? Did Hermione Granger just smirk? Oh no!!! The world has come to an end! All hell froze over and pigs just flew!" he said smirking still broader.
"Nope. Mona Cambell just smirked." She said as she reappeared with a megaphone. Draco looked at her totally lost. The other coyotes stared at her and gave her questioning looks. She gave them a small wink and turned on the megaphone.
"Attention people of Coyote Ugly bar! Someone here has just ordered a water. Now if you've been here before, then you know what happens to those who order just water. This time, however, the person I know personally. His name is Draco Malfoy, and we were worst enemies at school when we were growing up. He used to think I was below him since I'm muggleborn. I was the buck-toothed, bushy haired, bookworm who no one thought would ever be could for anything, but a few answers. Now here he is, dateless, alone, and ordering a water at a bar. So Draco, this is for all of the mean things that you said to me during school." She said smiling. What happened next took Draco by surprise. Mona pulled out the sprayer that was attached to the sink and turned it on full blast. Draco was hit with a gust of cold water. The people in the bar began to chant:
"Hell no, H2O. Hell no, H2O. Hell no, H2O. Hell no, H2o…"
The other coyotes jumped up on the bar with glasses of water in their hands as they began to dump them all over Draco. He didn't have time to think or react because it was all over in a minute. Mona turned off the megaphone, and the people began to stop chanting. She turned around and faced Draco smiling sweetly.
"Consider that a whole life time worth of Christmas, birthday, and what ever else there is presents." She said as she headed in the opposite direction. Draco stared at her retreating back. He pulled out his wand and dried himself. The thought of giving up crossed her mind, but Malfoys never give up so he got up and walked to the back of the bar.
Finally, happy hour came. The lights in the bar went out and everyone fell silent. Only the sound of the faucet dripping was heard. Then there was a tapping noise. Then the sound of some one drumming their fingers on the bar. Then…
K: Pop
T: Six
Me: Squish
C: Uh Uh
M: Cicero
W: Lipshits
And now the Six Merry Murderess of the Coyote Ugly bar in their rendition of the Cell Block Tango.
K: Pop
T: Six
Me: Squish
C: Uh Uh
M: Cicero
W: Lipshits
All: He had it coming.
He had it coming.
He only had himself to blame.
If you had been there
If you'd have seen it
I betcha you would've done the same
K: You know how people have these little habits that get you down. Like Bernie. Bernie like to chew gum. No not chew. Pop. So I came home this one day and I'm really irritated and I'm looking for a little bit of sympathy and there's Bernie. Lying on the couch, drinking a beer and chewing. No, not chewing. POPPING! So I said to him, I said you pop that gum one more time... and he did. So I took the shotgun off the wall and I fired two warning shots. Into his head.
All: He had it coming
He had it coming
He only had himself to blame
If you'd have been there
If you'd have heard it
I betcha you would've done the same
T: I met Ezekiel Young from Salt Lake City about two years ago and he told me he was single and we hit it off right away. So we started living together. He'd go to work. He'd come home. I'd fix him a drink. We'd have dinner. And then I found out… single he told me? Single my ass! Not only was he married, oh no. He had six wives. One of those Mormons, you know? So that night when he came home from work, I fixed him his drink as usual. You know, some guys just can't hold their arsenics.
All: He had it coming
He had it coming
He took a flower in his prime
And then he used it
And he abused it
It was a murder, but not a crime
Me: Now I'm standing in the kitchen carving up a chicken for dinner, minding my own business. In storms my husband Wilbur in a jealous rage. 'You've been screwing the milkman?' he said. He was crazy and he kept on screaming 'You've been screwing the milkman?' Then he ran into my knife. He ran into my knife ten times.
All: If you had been there
If you had seen it
I betcha you would've done the same
C:*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
M: Yeah, but did you do it?
C: Uh Uh. Not guilty!
M: My sister Veronica and I had this double act and my husband Charlie traveled around with us. Now for the last number in our act we these twenty acrobatic tricks in a row. One, two, three, four, five, splits, spread eagles, back flips, flip-flops, one right after the other. So this one night before the show we were down at the hotel Cicero, the three of us boozing, having a few laughs, and we ran out of ice so I go out to get some. I come back, open the door, and there's Veronica and Charlie doing number seventeen, the spread eagle… well, I was in such a state of shock, I completely blacked out. I can't remember a thing. It wasn't until later when I was washing the blood off my hands I even knew they were dead!
All: They had it coming
They had it coming
They had it coming all a along
I didn't do it
But if I done it
How could you tell me that I was wrong?
They had it coming
They had it coming
They had it coming all along
I didn't do it
But if I done it
How could you tell me that I was wrong?
W: I loved Al Lipshits more than I could possibly say. He was a real artistic guy. Sensitive, a painter, but he was always trying to find himself. He'd go out looking or himself every night and on the way. He found Ruth, Gladys, Rosemary, and Irving. I guess you could say we broke up because of artistic differences. He saw himself as alive, and I saw him dead!
A: The dirty bum, bum, bum, BUM
The dirty bum, bum, bum, BUM
They had it coming.
They had it coming
They had it coming all along
I didn't do it
But if I done it
How could you tell us that we were wrong?
He had it coming
He had it coming
He only had himself to blame
If you'd have been there
If you'd have seen it
I betcha you would've done the same
K: You pop that gum one more time…
T: Single he told me?
Me: Ten times
C: *~*~*~*~*~*~*
M: Number seventeen the spread eagle
W: Artistic differences
K: Pop
T: Six
Me: Squish
C: UhUh
M: Cicero
W: Lipshits
The crowd went wild! The coyotes finished their song, and began to dance. The men went crazy and Wyllie began to hand out free drinks. For a while, Mona had completely forgotten all about Draco and the whole "hell no, H2O" thing. Once the people had left and Mona was paid, she left Coyote Ugly and headed to her motorcycle, which was parked in the same place. Draco was standing there leaning against the wall.
"What now, Malfoy? I would've thought that getting you soaked was enough to get you off my back. Please, I'm very tired so just let me go home now." She said yawning slightly.
"Sorry, no can do. The way I see it, you owe me. I suffered huge humiliation when I could've easily just hexed you. But no. Now you have to go out to dinner with me." He said looking triumphant. Mona scowled.
"Fine. I'm sick of you following me everywhere. So I'll go to dinner with you tomorrow at four. Actually, it'll be more like lunch, but anyway, pick me up at my house and we'll leave." She said.
"Sounds good. And as a special bonus, I'll even let you pick the restraint. Now don't you fell special?" he asked sarcastically.
"I'm honored." Said Mona as she got on her motorcycle and drove off leaving Draco, who looked very pleased with himself.
A/N: God that took forever! That song seems to go on, and on, and on, and on… It's called the Cell Block Tango, and it's from the movie, Chicago, which is one of my personal favorites. I didn't have the words to the Hungarian's part so I did that other thing, and I couldn't do the echo in the song either. Hope you don't mind. I can finally say that I'm definitely happy with this chapter. Hope you enjoyed it!!! Please read and review!!
Lots of Love,
RonFan