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Chapter 14 – Eavesdropping

Sunlight shone down into Buffy's eyes making her throw her arm across her face and groan loudly. Eventually she removed her arm and opened her eyes to see a few rays of sun creeping through the gaps in the boarded up windows. She got up shortly and glancing at her watch saw that it was just after ten, much longer than she had slept in a long time. Buffy dressed quickly, jeans and a sweater and went down the stairs.

Sirius was in the kitchen and he looked up briefly as she came in.

 "I made tea," he said, gesturing to two chipped enamel mugs that they had carted all the way from Liverpool. "And we can make toast." He stuck a piece of bread on a poker and held to in the direction of the fire. Buffy followed suite and soon they were munching on toast and drinking tea, though without milk.

 "Yum," Buffy mumbled, randomly spraying crumbs. "Oops! The goodness of warm food doesn't exactly make me mind my manners." They finished quickly and sat on the rickety wooden chairs around the kitchen table.

 "So what's the plan for today? More werewolf adventures, randomly slaying some vampires, kicking some Auror butt, shopping?"

 "Shopping actually," Sirius said with a laugh.  "I'll have to stay here, can't afford to be out too much, not with Peter and Remus about. If you can get another paper and some more food, and ask some questions around town."
 "Be undercover-Buffy, gotcha," Buffy said quickly, jumping up and brushing crumbs from her jeans. She picked up her cloak and Sirius handed her a purse full of money.
 Buffy threw the long cloak around her shoulder and put the hood up. The sky was once again grey and threatening to rain as she gingerly pushed through the ivy covering the door. In her pocket she carried the letters she had written the night before.
She walked into the main road of Hogsmeade which was fairly busy, people doing day-today shopping. She found the post office first, paid for her letters to be sent.
 "My name is Joan Smith," she said in her best English accent. "I'm staying in the village for a while. Is it possible to pick up my post from her once a week?" The lady working in the post office assured her it was and she went on her way.

Buffy bought more food, branching out by getting milk and some butter for their toast. She visited the sweet shop, Honeydukes and spent a joyous twenty minutes looking at all the sweets and trying all the testers. She eventually left, laden down with a large bag full of varied sweets. Buffy wandered down the street, occasionally glancing at passers-by, some more interesting than others. She was about to turn back towards the Shrieking Shack when she overheard something that made her stop.

 "…..Well Dumbledore wants us teachers to be on our look out too obviously," a stern looking black haired woman was saying to a tired looking man. "You of all people know what he is capable of, Remus."

 "I find it unrealistic to think that he will make a fully fledged attack on the castle," Remus replied, frowning slightly. "The dementors guarding the castle are a precaution too far I believe Minerva." Buffy turned and, careful to keep out of sight, she followed them up the street.

 "As do I and we know how Dumbledore feels about them," Minerva replied. "But the Minister feels it necessary to protect Harry."

"The Minister thinks a lot of things," Remus said darkly and Minerva nodded slightly. "Still, the students have the Halloween feast to look forward to. I trust the kitchens are busy?"

 "Of course, Dumbledore doesn't believe the current situation should have an infringement on normal Hogwarts life for the students. Everyone will be in the Great Hall to celebrate as usual," Minerva said. "Did I hear Parvati Patil say that you had had the students face a boggart? How did that turn out....?" Their voices faded as Buffy disappeared in the other direction, towards the Shrieking Shack.

  "Sirius?" Buffy called as she entered the kitchen at the Shrieking Shack. She pushed back her hood and put her bags down. She was red cheeked from the wind and her hair was slightly tousled.

 Sirius came into the kitchen.
 "Hey how was it? he asked, somewhat enviously.
 "Fun," Buffy replied, throwing off her cloak and sitting in the chair. "Didn't get any trouble, got everything you wanted and some good food, especially some candy from that Honeydukes place." Sirius began to rifle through the bags, extracting the newspaper Buffy had bought and looking at the other items.

 "Oh and I sorted out the post thing, I sent the letters and I'm gonna pick up my post once a week under the name of Joan Smith. I always liked the name Joan," Buffy mused. "Oh and it's a good thing you didn't come with me because I saw this man and woman, Hogwarts teachers and one of them was called Remus and one Minerva."

 "Lupin," Sirius said and his eyes went opaque again. "And Minerva McGonagall I bet. What did they say?"

 "Well," Buffy said thoughtfully. "They talked about dementors guarding the school, but then we knew that. Neither of them were too thrilled about that, nor is Dumbledore apparently."

 "I bet, he despises the dementors, always has," Sirius said, teeth gritted.
 "And they said that there would be the Halloween feast as normal, despite the fact that you're roaming free," Buffy added. "Something about everyone in the school being in a great hall. And something else about a bog but I missed that mostly."

Sirius jumped up from the chair he had been sitting on and began to pace.
 "Then that's it," he announced, continuing to pace. "I'll have to make my move on Halloween. With any luck I can get into the common room while all the students are in the Great Hall. Then I can grab Peter, make him transform into his human form, and take him to the Great Hall to show people."

 "How you gonna get in?" Buffy said, watching him pace.

 "The passageway through the Whomping Willow, I can get onto the grounds and as long as I'm in my animagus form I can slip in unnoticed."

 "So I take it this plan doesn't involve me?" Buffy said, somewhat hurt though she wasn't quite sure why. Sirius stopped pacing and looked at her, fixing her with his piercing gaze.

 "It's too risky," he said apologetically. "I'm sorry but a dog will go unnoticed, a human won't."

 "Hey, it's okay," Buffy said trying to sound nonchalant. "It's just kind of sad that it's all over, I mean it was kind of fun. But of course it's great that you'll be innocent and all that, it's just I like it here, going back to Sunnydale and fighting vamps and all of that just isn't very appealing right now."
 "Well it's not like we won't see each other," Sirius said, also attempting to sound causal. "I mean I can come and visit you and you can come and visit me. But I get what you mean. The last few months, well let's just say they've been a lot better than the last twelve years. I was part of a fight to protect the world from the apocalypse, and then I travelled across country with you. I- well it's been great."
 Buffy was at a loss for words, it felt like there was a lot she wanted to say but she didn't know how to say it. She opened her mouth a few times and then closed it again. She didn't know how she felt.
 "Well," she said with a shaky laugh. "Better have some dinner then." She stood up and turned to rifle through the bags.
 "Buffy," Sirius began and Buffy turned, almost too quickly towards him.

 "Yes?" she said quickly.

Sirius regarded her apprehensively. He wanted to speak, he really did but he had no idea what to say. Stay with me, how could he ask her to do that? For a start he was older than her, she eighteen and he thirty five. He knew Angel had been older than her but that was a bit different. And what did her have to offer her? Nothing. He was a wanted criminal and she was the slayer, they didn't exactly fit well.

 "I-" he began again. "I- well I want to thank you for everything. You've been great you really have." Sirius knew as he spoke that he had bottled out of saying what he felt. He looked at Buffy and he thought he saw a glimmer of something – was it disappointment? – in her eyes. But he dismissed it his imagination and Buffy turned back to the shopping with a swift smile to him.

Much later that evening Sirius lay in his small bed in his room thinking about that evening. After their talk they had dinner and the atmosphere between them had been oddly strained. Sirius felt like Buffy was being cold to him but he couldn't figure out what it was he had done. I mean, she wasn't part of the final adventure but he knew that that wasn't something she would hold against him in any way. Maybe it was him; maybe he had been acting strangely. He knew why it would be – he was in love with her. He knew that now, he had felt it grow from the moment he saw her brought past his cell in Azkaban and had seen her beauty in the dankness of the place parallel to hell. But it wasn't just that, it was her, it was the person she was so strong and yet so soft inside, so hurt at such a young age, and also what he knew she could be. She was special he knew that and it made him love her even more.

Sirius wasn't the only one awake that night; Buffy too lay in her four poster bed, oblivious to him being awake too. She rolled over angrily, attempting to force herself to sleep but of course having no success. It was her own stupid fault, she decided, Sirius was a friend to her, of course he didn't think of her any other way, despite what she may feel. She didn't know what she really felt but she knew what her heart did when she saw him and how she felt around him. He was a handsome man, the years in Azkaban hadn't entirely taken that from him and when he smiled his face lit up with laughter. His eyes were a different matter; the pain etched in them reflected his life story. But it was him, who he was, that made her feel how she did when she was with him, a million feelings rushing around. All at once she felt comfortable, like being in your own warm bed in the middle of a storm and knowing you are safe, and also like a puppet jolted around, bouncing from one emotion to another. But it was ridiculous; she was a young girl, a child to him. That was probably why dinner had been so awkward, he had picked up on what she felt and was trying to let her down gently. Well, she decided, pummelling her pillow and causing feathers to fly out with slayer strength pummelling, it would not be like that anymore, she would keep how she felt deep inside, for her alone, and make things how they were before.

*****

I realise you are probably cursing me now, for letting them get so close, but then pushing them apart. But if you've read the books, they've got a long wait before Sirius finally confronts Pettigrew so don't worry……