Chapter 3 - "There You'll Be"
The lyrics to "There You'll Be" have been removed from this chapter to bring it into compliance with the posted ruling of April 27th. I know it affects the narrative and I apologize.
Kagome smoothed the chocolate brown dress, then picked up the matching cardigan. The turtleneck dress was simple and beautiful. Lifting the necklace from it's place in her jewelry box she slipped it over her head. Her finger tracing over each bead and claw of it. She blinked back her tears. Not tonight, she wasn't going to cry over Inu Yasha tonight. She chuckled at herself she made that promise each night; and each night she cried herself to sleep. She knew her mother, Sesshomaru, Souta, and Rin all told her it was time to let him go. Move on with her life, it had been fifteen months since they had parted and still he haunted her every waking moment. In her dreams he still held her, protecting her from all the heartache and pain the world piled on a teenage unwed mother.
A soft coo from the crib caught her attention. Turning she looked at the second love of her life. He was going to have her gray eyes, with his white hair and golden beige skin on him they would look silver, she had hoped he would have Inu Yasha's gold. "What is it handsome? Hmm? Momma is going out with her friends and your gonna stay with your Auntie Rin." She smiled as Kenmaru reached his hands up to her. Lifting him she hugged him close, blinking back the tears that threatened again. It wasn't fair, Inu Yasha would never see his son, never see his first step. Never hear him say Papa for the first time. Then would he have been born without their bargain? A tugging sensation caused her to look down and see his fist closed around a bead. "Yes sweetie, this was your daddy's." She walked over to the wall and pointed to the sword that hung there. "So is that. That is your daddy's sword. It was made from your grand daddy's fang."
Lifting the heavy diaper bag she headed out of her wing of the huge home. She hadn't wanted to move in, but Sesshomaru and Rin had convinced her it was best. She had to admit they were right. She had been able to attend cram school and get into a university. If not for their help she would be working at the shrine or some burger joint. She would be starting with her friends. But, things had changed, she had found what was important and lost it. She would gladly give up everything to go back, to be in held in Inu Yasha's arms one more time. But, he had taught her in so many little ways to be strong. To reach higher than others expected, to show the world what it could be, not what it was. He expected to make the world better for their son. Her chin lifted, she couldn't let him down. In a strange way he was still taking care of them. His vow before Shippo, Kiarara and Myoga, she had learned, wasn't just words. Sesshomaru had explained it. The vow, was one an Inuyoukai took before going into battle, if he had not claimed a mate. He would either return and take the female as his mate or his family would take her in and she would be treated as his widow.
Yuka, Eri, Ayumie and Hojo were waiting for her at the door. Handing Kenmaru to his aunt, Kagome kissed her son's cheek. "Be a good boy." She admonished gently chuckling at the smile that crossed his face. She took a moment and gave Sesshomaru the number of the club they would be at. He surprised her by handing her a cell phone.
"It is capable of receiving pictures, so we will send you some when we put him down. It will also be easier than trying to keep up with a slip of paper." Sesshomaru explained. His arms went around Rin's waist as the four girls and Hojo left for their night out. "I don't like that boy." He grumbled.
Rin laughed, "Oh Sessho, you wouldn't like him if he was the god emperor of the earth. You're still mad at your brother for his decision to go with Kikyou."
"Hmph." he snorted before kissing her cheek. "You are always your most beautiful when holding a baby, Rin."
"Flatterer." She teased turning her head to kiss him gently. His lips as soft and sensual as always.
The foursome walked down the street, looking up Kagome noticed the moon was dark. "New Moon." She muttered. New images flooded her mind. His look of helplessness after being bitten by the spider youkai. His soft admission, he liked her scent. Inu Yasha was always so much gentler on the night of the new moon. She remembered one new moon, right after Goshinki had broken Tetsusaiga. It was the first time Sango had seen the change. Miroku pointing out the missing ears and fangs. Then later the two of them sitting sharing a couple of sodas. There had been a breeze that night, his midnight black hair blew gently, his violet eyes so much gentler than the normal gold, yet still they held the same strength. Inu Yasha would always complain he felt useless and week on those nights. She had never told him. Never told him that he was never weak. His constant presence had filled her heart and soul. Never once had she felt in danger as long as he was near.
"Earth to Kagome." Yuka called laughing until she saw the pain etched on her friends face. "Kagome what's wrong?"
Kagome shook her head, "Nothing. This the place?" Yuka nodded and they entered the new karaoke bar.
Hours passed and slowly each of the girls realized that Kagome was thinking of something. But, it wasn't until she stood and sang her song. When she had chosen the song, the DJ had scoffed at such a powerful sad song being sung by a kid. But as her eyes closed at the first bar of music and her voice lifted it spellbound the audience. Never once did she open her eyes, but the words seem to come from the depths of her soul. The women of the audience were reaching for tissues by the second verse, the men were shifting uncomfortably by the third. As she finished not a dry eye remained.
"Guys, I'm gonna catch a cab and go home. It was fun. Good night." Kagome started to leave, but Hojo's hand on her arm stopped her, "Yes Hojo?"
"You loved him didn't you? The guy ... the baby's father. Even now after he ran off to his old girlfriend, you still love him." He asked.
"Hai Hojo. I loved him from the moment I first saw him until the last moment I saw him. I never meant to lead you on. But, there will never be anyone else. I'm sorry." Kagome answered.
"I hope he comes back to you Higarashi. I hope he realizes how special you are." He watched her nod and leave.
Arriving back at the mansion Kagome went to her room. Kenmaru would all ready be asleep in the crib in Sesshomaru and Rin's room. Carefully she lifted Tetsusaiga off it's hooks and carried it into the bedroom. Climbing onto her bed she curled her body around the ancient sword and once again cried herself to sleep.