R_M : I decided to break the monotony by making a songchap (or a songfic type of chapter) I didn't know what to call it . ^__~
Disclaimer : Yes , on the DOZENth chapter , I decided to type out a disclaimer ! (O_O);; Yeah . Weiß Kreuz and its characters does NOT belong to me . (Although I tend to 'borrow' Ken once in a while in activities I don't care to mention ...) Kidding ! They belong to whomever they belong to . Yup . Only the fic belongs to me .
Yes . And btw ,the song belongs to Sarah McLachlan (whew! It's a boggling name to spell) again , it does NOT belong to me.
Note : I forgot to mention that they are , and ALWAYS will be looking like the bishies in the original series . Despite the fact that I have accepted how Ken , Schuldich , Aya and Nagi looks in Gluhen , I will never be able to imagine them acting out my fics .
There .
I'm not sure if the song fits , but , well , I just decided to copy and paste . *lol*
Enjoy !
† † †
*
Spend all your time waiting for that second chance
For the break that will make it okay
There's always some reason to feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
*
He had been coming to their apartment for five days now , he knew Ken was home during this time of day – Aya would be off to work and Ken would stay at home the whole day .
Had it been that long since they talked ? Had it been that long since ... ?
He would knock and call out and yell ...
But no one answered .
No one ever answered .
Tomorrow would be Sunday .
They were always home on Sundays , both he and his brother .
Schuldich would come back tomorrow .
*
I need some distraction or a beautiful release
Memories seep from my veins
Let me be empty and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight
*
† † †
**
*
In the arms of the Angel far away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the Angel
may you find some comfort here
*
Yohji had come to visit him last Wednesday to tell him that Crawford had withdrawn the deal and to find out why he had gone absent .
He didn't say 'I told you so' like he should have . Yohji was that type of guy . At first glance , you'd think that he'd tell you over and lecture you on how to run your life , but he was a cool guy ; he's never done that so far with Schuldich ; he's just offer some advice or tell Schuldich what his opinion was but he'd never gone as far as to stick his nose where it doesn't belong .
He was totally sympathetic to Schuldich – but Schuldich didn't want his sympathy . He didn't want his company .
He just wanted to be alone .
... and to talk to Ken .
† † †
*
So tired of the straight line, and everywhere you turn
There's vultures and thieves at your back
The storm keeps on twisting, you keep on building the lies
That you make up for all that you lack
*
His nights were spent tossing and turning restlessly on the bed , yearning for that warm body under the covers , to smell the familiar pine shampoo lingering in the chill air.
He would always awaken to the sound of glass shattering in his nightmare-reality .
He woke up that Sunday morning , filled with apprehension .
He was finally going to see Ken today . He was going to explain , make him believe what he had to say .
Strange to say , but he had never been this nervous about anything before . And now that he was , it was about a over-energetic teenager who he absolutely was crazy about .
He dressed quickly and glanced at his reflection in the mirror .
He looked pale and tired , with dark rings trenching under his eyes . His long mane of orange-red hair was limp and lifeless .
But Ken didn't care how he looked . Ken wasn't that shallow .
He glanced at his watch and grabbed the keys to his car . He had to hurry if he was going to catch up with them before they try to leave .
The sky was dark overhead , crackling with thunder and lightning . It looked like it was midnight instead of early morning ...
It reflected exactly how he felt .
Confused .
Mad .
Hurting .
The drive to downtown was long and bleak ; fraying his nerves even more . He had already opened the window because of the oppressive air in the car .
He parked right in front of their apartment door and had emerged tentatively out of his car , like a crab from its shell , just hoping that they would let him talk ; that he could explain to Ken .
Like a child , he hoped that some sort of miracle would happen , that everything would be all right . That Ken wouldn't be mad at him anymore .
Slowly , he raked his hair with trembling fingers as he let out a tense sigh , before proceeding to knock softly on the wooden door , willing for it to open .
He willed Ken's beautiful face to peer through the shuttered windows and to open the door .
God . He didn't care if the brunette pummeled him on the face or beat the living shit out of him , just as long as Schuldich saw him – that was enough .
But ... there was no sound from its interior .
He rapped louder , maybe they were still asleep or maybe , they couldn't hear him ... maybe they were doing their cleaning and the radio was on .
But he knew , there was no one inside .
*
It don't make no difference, escaping one last time
It's easier to believe
In this sweet madness, oh this glorious sadness
That brings me to my knees
*
He kept knocking , softly calling out Ken's name praying for him to appear at the door with that beautiful smile on his face .
" Ken ... please ..."
There was no reply to his supplications .
He roared out the brunette's name , madly lunging against the door like a rabid dog , threatening to break it down ... he scratched and clawed and knocked until his knuckles were raw and bleeding and his fingernails threatened to be torn out of their sockets ...
*
In the arms of the Angel far away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie
In the arms of the Angel
may you find some comfort here
*
It was a long time before he stopped . His arm was now streaked with blood like a grotesque painting – but he could no longer feel the pain . His voice had grown so hoarse that he almost couldn't speak , but he no longer cared .
The pain he felt in his heart claimed superiority over these tiny trifles . He was drowning in the chanting pain . 'I hate you ! I hate you ! I HATE YOU ! Don't you dare show your face to me again you cheating scum !'
Slowly , he sank down on the steps . 'I hate you ! I hate you ! I HATE YOU !'
He had never sunk this low .
He had never been this depressed .
The only person who he ever loved was gone from his arms .
'I hate you ! I hate you ! I HATE YOU !'
The rain had started falling now , slowly at first , with a furious display of lightning bolts and swirling clouds like an elaborate light show , and then heavily in a torrential downpour .
Maybe his angel was weeping for him .
Maybe God was watching after all ...
He sat there , with his face buried in his hands , his hair darker as the rain danced down the dull tendrils , like dewdrops quenching the flames ... Raindrops coursed through the lackluster strands , and dripped onto the already wet pavement .
One could no longer distinguish the sound of one raindrop in a torrent , it was just a loud , collective pitter-patter that was deafening to the senses – the harmony of unearthly voices in the earthly elements...
All the pain he had experienced in the past , he could no longer remember them , because in his whole life , his heart had never ached so much . They were just raindrops , those trifling troubles ... and losing Ken ... is the storm .
He raised his eyes , peering through the curtain of dark hair at the street watching as light glinted back from the tiny crystals – tiny mirrors exploding on contact with the unyielding reality .
He had never realized how much his eyes stung , how they tingled and smarted – he was not even aware of the salty tears mingling with the raindrops .
He could only recognize the pain ... and the drumming of the cold rain on his soaked back .
*
You're in the arms of the Angelmay you find some comfort here
*
Dan : I agree . Schu would probably never be in good terms with Aya . We'd just have to see ne ? Yup , I do play ^__^ Yup , there are many cute guys playing , but of course , there is never anyone who could be a fraction as adorable as Ken . If any guy could be even half the guy Ken is , I'd marry him ! *lol* Kidding ! ^___~
Brizey : *lol* I don't know if that's such a compliment because people might have the urge to strangle me every time they read a cliffhanger ending ! O___O;;; Yup . I broken nose can't be too fun .
Anna Hibiki : Whoa ! This is the first time I've seen an anti-Aya ! Woohoo ! ^__^ He's not exactly my favorite character , but he's fine ; specially when he's totally head over heels toes and soles in love with Kenken ! +__+
Ran Mouri : *whacks Farf* Do you mind !!! *grins as Ran* Hiya there pardner ! *glares at Ken who hides behind Farf* So . He has comfy legs huh ? How come you never say that when I'm around ??!
Aya : O_O
Farf : O_O
Crawford : @_@ I like her .
R_M : .;; Did I hear what he just said or was I hallucinating ?
Ran : *nods*
R_M : Oh God save me ! *runs away from a hentai-y Crawford*
Whisper Reilman : Dolt . Hm. It's cute . I can imagine Schuldich as a dolt . *grins* dolt ... doltdoltdoltdoltdoltdoltdoltdolt ! *giggles* Schuldich is a doooooooolt ! Bwahahaha ! It's my new favorite word ! ^__^ Complain all you want , *singsong voice* I won't tee~ell ^__~
Pandora.81 : Hullo there ! ^__^ Arigatou !
Crawford : *is damned to a hell where maniac authors like R_M run amok*
R_M : . Wheeeee !
Sakusha : I don't think anybody cares . Kenken probably ... and Aya's boss ... hmm. Can't think of anyone else . ^__~
Natakus Ribbon : Waiiii ! Arigatou ! I really appreciate your compliments !!! ^_____^ Yup ! KenxSchu is my favorite pairing too ! You're welcome . ^__~
Mistress of Darkness1 : Ne , but I wasn't mean to him ... was I ? *bats eyelashes* Wow . *big eyes at the really's* Arigatou !!! *ponders* Yeah . I've never written a 'Crawford is good' fic . Maybe I should try that ... hmmm ... now you've got me thinking ...