"MR.FUJITA!" a voice called form the back of the police station.
"I'll interrogate him later! Just leave him alone for now! AND DON'T BOTHER ME AGAIN!" Saito shouted back angrily. "Ahou." He muttered. He reached for a cigarette- they were the only things between him and killing the other police officers that he worked with. To his dismay, the box had disappeared. Saito swore under his breath.
"You should watch your mouth, Saito," a calm voice said, from the darkest corner of the room.
"What are you doing here..." Saito asked coldly without turning toward the corner to see who it was. He already knew. "... Battousai?"
"I was just here to have a short conversation with you about mud," Kenshin said, coming out of the shadows. He was smoking a cigarette that had an odd, blue glow at the end of it instead of the usual red.
"What is that?" Saito asked, gesturing toward the cigarette hanging from his mouth.
"Oh, this? It's a special cigarette that I got form a store downtown. Here, try one," Kenshin said, tossing Saito the box. Kenshin breathed in too hard and snorted.
"Pig," Saito muttered. He examined the box. "It's blue," Saito observed. It took a while for Kenshin to respond. He was too busy coughing and snorting.
"Yes. It...is," Kenshin spluttered, blushing slightly. "I use the unique blue box to tell which ones they are." This was obviously not true because Kenshin had just got the cigarettes that day. Saito pulled one out. It had a picture drawn on it in blue ink. Saito examined it more closely and found that it was a picture of two people connected by a thread of smoke from each of their cigarettes.
"So... what's the catch?" Saito asked, turning it over and looking at it. "You don't smoke. There's obviously a catch." Kenshin leaned over and blew some blue smoke into Saito's face. Saito coughed.
"There isn't a catch. Just try one. You'll like them, believe me. I didn't like smoking until I tried one of these a few months ago," Kenshin lied. He reached over and pulled a match out of Saito's shirt pocket. He stuck the blue cigarette into Saito's mouth and lit it quickly before he could change his mind.
"What did you do that for, Battousai?! I-" Suddenly, he stopped. There was a bright flash of blue light and Saito slumped forward in his chair and passed out. It was the last thing Kenshin saw before he fell to the floor and into unconsciousness.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Kenshin woke up, groggy and dizzy. His head was resting on Saito's desk. Had Saito put him there when he passed out? He looked outside the window and saw that it was dark out. He stood up, rubbing his head, and walked around to the front of Saito's desk and tripped over something on the floor. Kenshin looked down and found, to his horror, his own body lying under his foot.
"Ouch... Battousai... why did you do that? Oh... what happened?" Kenshin's body stood up and rubbed its side where Kenshin had hit it.
"Saito... is that you?" Kenshin asked, hardly able to speak. He recognized his voice as not his own, but Saito's.
"What are you talking about, Battousai, of course it's...me?" Saito stared at his body standing in front of him. "WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME?!" Saito cried, grabbing at his clothing. "No way... I'm...I'm...I'm...I'm... wearing PINK!"
"It's not pink!" Kenshin said, crossing his arms. "It's magenta!" He stared at his own lean body. It was tall and thin, but muscular and strong. "Wow. Saito, you have a NICE body!" Kenshin said.
"Shut up, Battousai. You're the only one who can be happy. Look at me! I've got LONG RED HAIR and I look like a GIRL!" Saito said. "If I have to stay in your body for a while, I'm going to cut your hair!"
"WHAT! NO WAY!" Kenshin yelled. "DON'T CUT MY HAIR!" Saito smirked in Kenshin's body. It looked right.
"I can do whatever I darn well please. This is my body now, right?" Saito asked. "And if you don't mind, can we switch swords? I can't stand a reverse blade..."
"No! We have to pretend nothing happened. I know what you do. You know what I do. I'll pretend to be you and you can pretend to be me. We are only stuck like this for three days, okay?" Kenshin said, trying to stay calm. "And no bathing for three days. I don't want you to see me naked!"
"Clean my body, Battousai. I'm not too worried about it, just don't do anything embarrassing," Saito said, pulling out the sword and examining it closely. "I trust you to act like I would. Oh, and also, you have to smirk right. And no saying 'oro'." Kenshin stared. This seemed to be harder than it looked.
"I can't... say... ORO?!" Kenshin exclaimed, waving his arms. "Why not?!"
"You have to act like I do, moron. I-" Saito was cut off by Kenshin.
"HEY... YOU have to act like ME too! I never call anyone a 'moron'," Kenshin said, closing his eyes.
"Okay, so we both have to act like each other. Let's practice while we still have time. Call me 'Battousai'," Saito instructed. "OOOOORRRRRROOOOO!!!"
"Hey, it's not like that!" Kenshin exclaimed. "It's like this: OORROO!"
"Smirk for me," Saito said. Kenshin attempted to smirk coolly like Saito usually did. It came out looking like a mix of disgust and like Kenshin was feeling constipated. Saito held back a snicker.
"What? Did I do it right?" Kenshin asked. Saito shook his head no. "Darn..."
"We'll just try our hardest," Saito said. "Now... where is your house again? Oh yeah, you live at the Kamiya Dojo, huh?" He started for the door. "Hang on!" Kenshin shouted. "Where do you live? OH WAIT. YOU... HAVE... A...WIFE!" Saito stopped. There was a long silence. A long, long, long, long, long silence.
"Yes, I do," Saito said plainly. "So what?"
"What do I do about her?"
"I don't know. I don't want you and her to..." Saito cringed, allowing his imagination to carry him to many undesirable conclusions. He turned. "Just say that you had a rough night and that you want to go straight to bed. Go into the GUEST room and tell her that you'll be waking up REALLY early, so you don't want to wake her and that's why you're staying there. OKAY?" Kenshin nodded, not really listening. He would just go with the flow.
"What's her name?" Kenshin asked.
"Tokio. No Miss, or –dono or anything, understand?" Saito asked. He turned on his heel. "I hate your clothing."
"I like yours," Kenshin whispered as Saito walked out the door in Kenshin's body. "I think I could get used to this."
Saito walked through the familiar doors of the Kamiya Dojo. He had fought the Battousai here only about a year before. He walked into the hallway.
"Which one is Battousai's room?" Saito wondered. "I don't know which one..." He was about to curse, but then realized that Battousai doesn't swear aloud. He tiptoed through the dark house, hoping everyone was asleep. Suddenly, a girl walked out of her room and looked his way.
"Kenshin?" the girl said, sleepily. "You're home!"
"Uh..." Saito had forgotten the girl's name from the last time he saw her. He knew it began with a 'K'...
"Kenshin, is something wrong? Where were you?" the girl asked.
"No, no, nothing is... uh... wrong. I was... um... at the police station," Saito said, uneasily.
"Oh. I'll go make you a cup of tea!" the girl said, spur of the moment. She walked off down the hall. "Are you coming?"
"Sure," Saito sighed and walked after her, wishing he were in his own body, at his own home, in his own woman's arms. The girl quickly whipped up a pot of tea and poured a cup for both of them.
"I was worried about you, Kenshin," the girl said, sipping her tea. Saito didn't reply. He just stared at his cup with a blank expression. "Kenshin?" Kaoru asked. "What's wrong?" Saito still didn't reply.
"I... must be suffering from amnesia...uh... that I must?" Saito made a feeble attempt to talk like Kenshin would.
"Why?" the girl said, taking another sip of her tea. "What don't you remember?"
"I... can't remember anything. Not even... where my room is, that I can't," Saito said, trying to smile innocently like Kenshin. He wound up putting on a Goro Fujita smile.
"Oh. You must be tired, Kenshin. I'll take you to your room and you can sleep," the girl took him by the hand. "But you really should tell me what's going on." They walked together to Kenshin's room and Saito opened the door. He walked inside.
"Thank you," Saito said. "Tanuki (raccoon)." He smacked a hand over his mouth. Oops.
"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME KENSHIN NO BAKA!?" the girl cried. She smacked him with a bokken that appeared out of thin air.
"OUCH! I mean......... OORROO!" Saito fell on his face. The girl stalked off and slammed the door behind her. Saito got up and rubbed his nose. He let out a moan. "I like my old life. Baka cigarettes!" Saito peeled off the MAGENTA gi, examining his new body. He dumped the gi on the floor, took out the sakabatou, and flipped the blade. Then, he sliced off all of the bright red hair that fell from his neck down. Cropping it short, he combed it back so that it was no longer tangled and matted. Then, he made his bed and crawled into the covers, falling asleep hours later.
A/N: Was that good? I'll do Kenshin's experience next, but two out of the three reviewers wanted to hear more about Saito, so I couldn't not include him! Tell me if anything is wrong here and if it is, I'll change it. Oh, by the way, I think that everyone knows this but: I don't own Rurouni Kenshin. I didn't put it at the beginning 'cause I forgot, but hey, I put it here, right? Isn't that what matters? Or do people have to read the "I don't own RK" statement at the beginning of the fic? I don't get it. It's like cheese or something. Stuff that I just don't understand.
REVIEW RESPONSES:
Pechan: Uh......... right, thanks? Heh? I added more Saito, does it make you happy? Actually I don't think it does because now Saito's not......... well......... himself anymore, so......... yeah. Thanks for reviewing!
Oro-chan no Tenshi: Thanks. Here's your update! And I'll include more Kenshin in the next chapter, but......... it'll be more like SaitoKenshin or something. Huh? Whatever, thanks anyway.
MissBehavin: I'm seeing you review nearly all of my stories! Thanks so much! Okay, you requested more Saito and so did Pechan, so I did. Now if it were a tie, I don't know what I would have done......... okay, actually, I probably would have put in more Saito because I'm a Saito fan. Heh heh.
"I'll interrogate him later! Just leave him alone for now! AND DON'T BOTHER ME AGAIN!" Saito shouted back angrily. "Ahou." He muttered. He reached for a cigarette- they were the only things between him and killing the other police officers that he worked with. To his dismay, the box had disappeared. Saito swore under his breath.
"You should watch your mouth, Saito," a calm voice said, from the darkest corner of the room.
"What are you doing here..." Saito asked coldly without turning toward the corner to see who it was. He already knew. "... Battousai?"
"I was just here to have a short conversation with you about mud," Kenshin said, coming out of the shadows. He was smoking a cigarette that had an odd, blue glow at the end of it instead of the usual red.
"What is that?" Saito asked, gesturing toward the cigarette hanging from his mouth.
"Oh, this? It's a special cigarette that I got form a store downtown. Here, try one," Kenshin said, tossing Saito the box. Kenshin breathed in too hard and snorted.
"Pig," Saito muttered. He examined the box. "It's blue," Saito observed. It took a while for Kenshin to respond. He was too busy coughing and snorting.
"Yes. It...is," Kenshin spluttered, blushing slightly. "I use the unique blue box to tell which ones they are." This was obviously not true because Kenshin had just got the cigarettes that day. Saito pulled one out. It had a picture drawn on it in blue ink. Saito examined it more closely and found that it was a picture of two people connected by a thread of smoke from each of their cigarettes.
"So... what's the catch?" Saito asked, turning it over and looking at it. "You don't smoke. There's obviously a catch." Kenshin leaned over and blew some blue smoke into Saito's face. Saito coughed.
"There isn't a catch. Just try one. You'll like them, believe me. I didn't like smoking until I tried one of these a few months ago," Kenshin lied. He reached over and pulled a match out of Saito's shirt pocket. He stuck the blue cigarette into Saito's mouth and lit it quickly before he could change his mind.
"What did you do that for, Battousai?! I-" Suddenly, he stopped. There was a bright flash of blue light and Saito slumped forward in his chair and passed out. It was the last thing Kenshin saw before he fell to the floor and into unconsciousness.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Kenshin woke up, groggy and dizzy. His head was resting on Saito's desk. Had Saito put him there when he passed out? He looked outside the window and saw that it was dark out. He stood up, rubbing his head, and walked around to the front of Saito's desk and tripped over something on the floor. Kenshin looked down and found, to his horror, his own body lying under his foot.
"Ouch... Battousai... why did you do that? Oh... what happened?" Kenshin's body stood up and rubbed its side where Kenshin had hit it.
"Saito... is that you?" Kenshin asked, hardly able to speak. He recognized his voice as not his own, but Saito's.
"What are you talking about, Battousai, of course it's...me?" Saito stared at his body standing in front of him. "WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME?!" Saito cried, grabbing at his clothing. "No way... I'm...I'm...I'm...I'm... wearing PINK!"
"It's not pink!" Kenshin said, crossing his arms. "It's magenta!" He stared at his own lean body. It was tall and thin, but muscular and strong. "Wow. Saito, you have a NICE body!" Kenshin said.
"Shut up, Battousai. You're the only one who can be happy. Look at me! I've got LONG RED HAIR and I look like a GIRL!" Saito said. "If I have to stay in your body for a while, I'm going to cut your hair!"
"WHAT! NO WAY!" Kenshin yelled. "DON'T CUT MY HAIR!" Saito smirked in Kenshin's body. It looked right.
"I can do whatever I darn well please. This is my body now, right?" Saito asked. "And if you don't mind, can we switch swords? I can't stand a reverse blade..."
"No! We have to pretend nothing happened. I know what you do. You know what I do. I'll pretend to be you and you can pretend to be me. We are only stuck like this for three days, okay?" Kenshin said, trying to stay calm. "And no bathing for three days. I don't want you to see me naked!"
"Clean my body, Battousai. I'm not too worried about it, just don't do anything embarrassing," Saito said, pulling out the sword and examining it closely. "I trust you to act like I would. Oh, and also, you have to smirk right. And no saying 'oro'." Kenshin stared. This seemed to be harder than it looked.
"I can't... say... ORO?!" Kenshin exclaimed, waving his arms. "Why not?!"
"You have to act like I do, moron. I-" Saito was cut off by Kenshin.
"HEY... YOU have to act like ME too! I never call anyone a 'moron'," Kenshin said, closing his eyes.
"Okay, so we both have to act like each other. Let's practice while we still have time. Call me 'Battousai'," Saito instructed. "OOOOORRRRRROOOOO!!!"
"Hey, it's not like that!" Kenshin exclaimed. "It's like this: OORROO!"
"Smirk for me," Saito said. Kenshin attempted to smirk coolly like Saito usually did. It came out looking like a mix of disgust and like Kenshin was feeling constipated. Saito held back a snicker.
"What? Did I do it right?" Kenshin asked. Saito shook his head no. "Darn..."
"We'll just try our hardest," Saito said. "Now... where is your house again? Oh yeah, you live at the Kamiya Dojo, huh?" He started for the door. "Hang on!" Kenshin shouted. "Where do you live? OH WAIT. YOU... HAVE... A...WIFE!" Saito stopped. There was a long silence. A long, long, long, long, long silence.
"Yes, I do," Saito said plainly. "So what?"
"What do I do about her?"
"I don't know. I don't want you and her to..." Saito cringed, allowing his imagination to carry him to many undesirable conclusions. He turned. "Just say that you had a rough night and that you want to go straight to bed. Go into the GUEST room and tell her that you'll be waking up REALLY early, so you don't want to wake her and that's why you're staying there. OKAY?" Kenshin nodded, not really listening. He would just go with the flow.
"What's her name?" Kenshin asked.
"Tokio. No Miss, or –dono or anything, understand?" Saito asked. He turned on his heel. "I hate your clothing."
"I like yours," Kenshin whispered as Saito walked out the door in Kenshin's body. "I think I could get used to this."
Saito walked through the familiar doors of the Kamiya Dojo. He had fought the Battousai here only about a year before. He walked into the hallway.
"Which one is Battousai's room?" Saito wondered. "I don't know which one..." He was about to curse, but then realized that Battousai doesn't swear aloud. He tiptoed through the dark house, hoping everyone was asleep. Suddenly, a girl walked out of her room and looked his way.
"Kenshin?" the girl said, sleepily. "You're home!"
"Uh..." Saito had forgotten the girl's name from the last time he saw her. He knew it began with a 'K'...
"Kenshin, is something wrong? Where were you?" the girl asked.
"No, no, nothing is... uh... wrong. I was... um... at the police station," Saito said, uneasily.
"Oh. I'll go make you a cup of tea!" the girl said, spur of the moment. She walked off down the hall. "Are you coming?"
"Sure," Saito sighed and walked after her, wishing he were in his own body, at his own home, in his own woman's arms. The girl quickly whipped up a pot of tea and poured a cup for both of them.
"I was worried about you, Kenshin," the girl said, sipping her tea. Saito didn't reply. He just stared at his cup with a blank expression. "Kenshin?" Kaoru asked. "What's wrong?" Saito still didn't reply.
"I... must be suffering from amnesia...uh... that I must?" Saito made a feeble attempt to talk like Kenshin would.
"Why?" the girl said, taking another sip of her tea. "What don't you remember?"
"I... can't remember anything. Not even... where my room is, that I can't," Saito said, trying to smile innocently like Kenshin. He wound up putting on a Goro Fujita smile.
"Oh. You must be tired, Kenshin. I'll take you to your room and you can sleep," the girl took him by the hand. "But you really should tell me what's going on." They walked together to Kenshin's room and Saito opened the door. He walked inside.
"Thank you," Saito said. "Tanuki (raccoon)." He smacked a hand over his mouth. Oops.
"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME KENSHIN NO BAKA!?" the girl cried. She smacked him with a bokken that appeared out of thin air.
"OUCH! I mean......... OORROO!" Saito fell on his face. The girl stalked off and slammed the door behind her. Saito got up and rubbed his nose. He let out a moan. "I like my old life. Baka cigarettes!" Saito peeled off the MAGENTA gi, examining his new body. He dumped the gi on the floor, took out the sakabatou, and flipped the blade. Then, he sliced off all of the bright red hair that fell from his neck down. Cropping it short, he combed it back so that it was no longer tangled and matted. Then, he made his bed and crawled into the covers, falling asleep hours later.
A/N: Was that good? I'll do Kenshin's experience next, but two out of the three reviewers wanted to hear more about Saito, so I couldn't not include him! Tell me if anything is wrong here and if it is, I'll change it. Oh, by the way, I think that everyone knows this but: I don't own Rurouni Kenshin. I didn't put it at the beginning 'cause I forgot, but hey, I put it here, right? Isn't that what matters? Or do people have to read the "I don't own RK" statement at the beginning of the fic? I don't get it. It's like cheese or something. Stuff that I just don't understand.
REVIEW RESPONSES:
Pechan: Uh......... right, thanks? Heh? I added more Saito, does it make you happy? Actually I don't think it does because now Saito's not......... well......... himself anymore, so......... yeah. Thanks for reviewing!
Oro-chan no Tenshi: Thanks. Here's your update! And I'll include more Kenshin in the next chapter, but......... it'll be more like SaitoKenshin or something. Huh? Whatever, thanks anyway.
MissBehavin: I'm seeing you review nearly all of my stories! Thanks so much! Okay, you requested more Saito and so did Pechan, so I did. Now if it were a tie, I don't know what I would have done......... okay, actually, I probably would have put in more Saito because I'm a Saito fan. Heh heh.