Promises of Someday 3/5
By koaladeb
Disclaimer information in part 1
~~~~~~~~~~
As she scouted around the mall food court for an empty table, Calleigh wondered how she had managed to find herself in this position: spending Saturday afternoon helping Horatio babysit his illegitimate niece and trying not to fall into a fantasy where this was her family.
It was hard- ever since she had accepted the invitation to lunch, the day had adopted a dreamlike quality to it- helping Maddy climb into the Hummer, fastening the girl's safety belt, and riding to the mall with Horatio. Every time he glanced into the rearview mirror to look at Maddy, Calleigh felt her heart leap with the knowledge that this is how he would be with his own children.
The small hand in her own began tugging, and Calleigh looked down to see an earnest look on Maddy's face. She leaned down and was told, "I need to go to the bathroom."
With a smile, Calleigh stood and caught Horatio's eye from where he was standing in line to place their order. She pointed to the restrooms and he acknowledged her silent statement with a nod.
Maddy went into a stall and Calleigh took the opportunity to take another look at her arm. Sliding Horatio's windbreaker down her arm, she took in the appearance of band-aids covering a wide bruise. Gently, she touched the spot where Horatio had kissed the bandages, recalling the sensation of his hands on her arm, the pressure of his mouth on her elbow and the shock of pleasure it had generated, the glimpse of recognition and awareness in his eyes she had caught over the rim of his sunglasses.
While she waited for Maddy, Calleigh pulled a small brush out of her purse and attempted to work some of the tangles free from her hair. She was finishing up when Maddy reappeared to wash her hands.
"Calleigh, will you brush my hair too?" she asked.
"Sure, honey," Calleigh responded, guiding her over to a small bench. She unfastened a couple of small barrettes that were in danger of sliding off Maddy's silky hair and began to brush the soft locks.
"Your hair is beautiful," she told the little girl as she reaffixed the barrettes.
"It's like Uncle Horatio's," Maddy said proudly, turning around and fingering strands of Calleigh's hair. "Daddy always said it was like Mommy's, but her hair is like yours."
Suddenly, Maddie dropped her hand and seemed to slump, as if her comment had somehow brought up something unpleasant.
Calleigh was confused for a moment, but then she remembered what Horatio had told her about Robert Keaton, Suzie's husband. He was the only father Maddy had ever known, and now he was in prison for murdering the man who was her biological father, Raymond Caine, a man Maddy would never meet.
Filled with compassion for the pain and confusion Maddy must be feeling, Calleigh asked, "You miss your daddy, don't you?"
Maddy nodded, and a couple of tears leaked out and spilled across her freckled cheeks. Calleigh wiped them away and drew the saddened child into her arms.
Maddie sniffled, saying, "Mommy told me he did a very bad thing and had to go away, so that he wouldn't hurt anyone else."
Calleigh rubbed small circles on the child's back. "How do you feel about that?"
Maddie shrugged and looked away. "I don't know. He used to hurt Mommy. I'm glad that he can't do that anymore. He would yell at her and I even saw him hit her, but then he would say he was sorry and he was different. Nicer. And he always took care of me and would color with me. I love him and I miss him but I..."
Calleigh suddenly understood some of what Maddy was feeling. She reflected on her own childhood, one in which she adored her father but feared him at the same time. She would watch her father drink until he was another person. A violent person. She did not like talking about it, but she realized if her experience could help Maddy in any way, if her pain could ease any of this little girl's, it was worth it.
She knelt on the floor so she and Maddy could be eye-to-eye. "I know, honey," she said softly. "You feel safer because he's not there to hurt your mommy, and he won't ever be able to hurt you, but feel bad about that because you love him, and that means you should want him home so you can be a family again. Is that right?"
Maddy nodded, wide-eyed. "How did you know?"
Calleigh smiled sadly. "Because my daddy was just like yours, only he never had to go away. He would get angry too, and he hit my mom and my brothers, and even me a couple times."
Suddenly their roles were reversed as Maddy wrapped Calleigh in a tight hug. "It's not your fault," she said, and Calleigh fought back tears. Maddy had probably heard those words from her mother every time Keaton lost his temper, and was sharing the only comfort she knew for this kind of situation.
"I know that, honey," she answered, pulling back and smoothing down Maddy's hair again. "I know that he loved me and didn't mean to be like that, but he couldn't stop himself sometimes."
Maddy was nodding, completely serious. "Do you still love him?" she asked in a small voice.
"Very much," Calleigh answered, smiling a little bit. "I still wish that he would change, for me and my family, but I love him anyway. He will always be my daddy and I will always be his little Lambchop."
At that, Maddy giggled. "Lambchop?"
Calleigh shrugged. "Yes, Lambchop. But he's the only one that's allowed to call me that, and no one else needs to know—especially your Uncle Horatio. So can that stay just between you and me?"
Maddy nodded, smiling. "It will be our secret, I promise."
Calleigh drew an exaggerated hand across her forehead as though relieved, which sent Maddy into another fit of giggles. Calleigh laughed too, standing up and offering her hand, which was grabbed instantly by the smiling child.
"Come on, our food is probably getting cold by now."
~~~~~
Coming out of the restroom, Calleigh spotted Horatio almost instantly, his tall and noble frame standing out in the crowd. She pointed him out to Maddy and they made their way over to the table he was guarding.
Sitting down, Horatio tucked a napkin into the front of Maddy's shirt and opened up her Happy Meal before turning to Calleigh with a teasing grin.
"I was about to send out a search party," he stated. "How much time does it take to go to the bathroom?"
Calleigh just rolled her eyes and took the cover off her chocolate milkshake, dipping fries into it and eating them happily.
"Maddy and I needed to brush our hair. The price of beauty, my friend."
Horatio reached over to steal some of Calleigh's fries. "I thought you said yours didn't cost a penny."
Calleigh blushed and looked over at Maddy, who was watching the exchange with a huge smile on her face, eyes sparkling. The picture she presented was made even more adorable by a small amount of ketchup on her chin. Wiping it off with a spare napkin, Calleigh looked back at Horatio, whose teasing grin had softened at her actions into an affectionate smile directed at his niece.
She kept her concentration on Maddy, chatting with the engaging girl and casting only short glances in Horatio's direction when he joined the conversation, never allowing her eyes to linger for more than a brief second before turning away again.
The meal progressed this way until Horatio made a second attempt to steal some of her fries. Calleigh swatted his hand away and moved the container so he could not reach it.
"Hey- it's not nice to keep those all to yourself," he complained. "You should share."
"You're the one who wanted a salad," she stated matter-of-factly, meeting his gaze head-on, a grin belying the piqued tone with which she had responded. "Deal with it."
Disclaimer information in part 1
~~~~~~~~~~
As she scouted around the mall food court for an empty table, Calleigh wondered how she had managed to find herself in this position: spending Saturday afternoon helping Horatio babysit his illegitimate niece and trying not to fall into a fantasy where this was her family.
It was hard- ever since she had accepted the invitation to lunch, the day had adopted a dreamlike quality to it- helping Maddy climb into the Hummer, fastening the girl's safety belt, and riding to the mall with Horatio. Every time he glanced into the rearview mirror to look at Maddy, Calleigh felt her heart leap with the knowledge that this is how he would be with his own children.
The small hand in her own began tugging, and Calleigh looked down to see an earnest look on Maddy's face. She leaned down and was told, "I need to go to the bathroom."
With a smile, Calleigh stood and caught Horatio's eye from where he was standing in line to place their order. She pointed to the restrooms and he acknowledged her silent statement with a nod.
Maddy went into a stall and Calleigh took the opportunity to take another look at her arm. Sliding Horatio's windbreaker down her arm, she took in the appearance of band-aids covering a wide bruise. Gently, she touched the spot where Horatio had kissed the bandages, recalling the sensation of his hands on her arm, the pressure of his mouth on her elbow and the shock of pleasure it had generated, the glimpse of recognition and awareness in his eyes she had caught over the rim of his sunglasses.
While she waited for Maddy, Calleigh pulled a small brush out of her purse and attempted to work some of the tangles free from her hair. She was finishing up when Maddy reappeared to wash her hands.
"Calleigh, will you brush my hair too?" she asked.
"Sure, honey," Calleigh responded, guiding her over to a small bench. She unfastened a couple of small barrettes that were in danger of sliding off Maddy's silky hair and began to brush the soft locks.
"Your hair is beautiful," she told the little girl as she reaffixed the barrettes.
"It's like Uncle Horatio's," Maddy said proudly, turning around and fingering strands of Calleigh's hair. "Daddy always said it was like Mommy's, but her hair is like yours."
Suddenly, Maddie dropped her hand and seemed to slump, as if her comment had somehow brought up something unpleasant.
Calleigh was confused for a moment, but then she remembered what Horatio had told her about Robert Keaton, Suzie's husband. He was the only father Maddy had ever known, and now he was in prison for murdering the man who was her biological father, Raymond Caine, a man Maddy would never meet.
Filled with compassion for the pain and confusion Maddy must be feeling, Calleigh asked, "You miss your daddy, don't you?"
Maddy nodded, and a couple of tears leaked out and spilled across her freckled cheeks. Calleigh wiped them away and drew the saddened child into her arms.
Maddie sniffled, saying, "Mommy told me he did a very bad thing and had to go away, so that he wouldn't hurt anyone else."
Calleigh rubbed small circles on the child's back. "How do you feel about that?"
Maddie shrugged and looked away. "I don't know. He used to hurt Mommy. I'm glad that he can't do that anymore. He would yell at her and I even saw him hit her, but then he would say he was sorry and he was different. Nicer. And he always took care of me and would color with me. I love him and I miss him but I..."
Calleigh suddenly understood some of what Maddy was feeling. She reflected on her own childhood, one in which she adored her father but feared him at the same time. She would watch her father drink until he was another person. A violent person. She did not like talking about it, but she realized if her experience could help Maddy in any way, if her pain could ease any of this little girl's, it was worth it.
She knelt on the floor so she and Maddy could be eye-to-eye. "I know, honey," she said softly. "You feel safer because he's not there to hurt your mommy, and he won't ever be able to hurt you, but feel bad about that because you love him, and that means you should want him home so you can be a family again. Is that right?"
Maddy nodded, wide-eyed. "How did you know?"
Calleigh smiled sadly. "Because my daddy was just like yours, only he never had to go away. He would get angry too, and he hit my mom and my brothers, and even me a couple times."
Suddenly their roles were reversed as Maddy wrapped Calleigh in a tight hug. "It's not your fault," she said, and Calleigh fought back tears. Maddy had probably heard those words from her mother every time Keaton lost his temper, and was sharing the only comfort she knew for this kind of situation.
"I know that, honey," she answered, pulling back and smoothing down Maddy's hair again. "I know that he loved me and didn't mean to be like that, but he couldn't stop himself sometimes."
Maddy was nodding, completely serious. "Do you still love him?" she asked in a small voice.
"Very much," Calleigh answered, smiling a little bit. "I still wish that he would change, for me and my family, but I love him anyway. He will always be my daddy and I will always be his little Lambchop."
At that, Maddy giggled. "Lambchop?"
Calleigh shrugged. "Yes, Lambchop. But he's the only one that's allowed to call me that, and no one else needs to know—especially your Uncle Horatio. So can that stay just between you and me?"
Maddy nodded, smiling. "It will be our secret, I promise."
Calleigh drew an exaggerated hand across her forehead as though relieved, which sent Maddy into another fit of giggles. Calleigh laughed too, standing up and offering her hand, which was grabbed instantly by the smiling child.
"Come on, our food is probably getting cold by now."
~~~~~
Coming out of the restroom, Calleigh spotted Horatio almost instantly, his tall and noble frame standing out in the crowd. She pointed him out to Maddy and they made their way over to the table he was guarding.
Sitting down, Horatio tucked a napkin into the front of Maddy's shirt and opened up her Happy Meal before turning to Calleigh with a teasing grin.
"I was about to send out a search party," he stated. "How much time does it take to go to the bathroom?"
Calleigh just rolled her eyes and took the cover off her chocolate milkshake, dipping fries into it and eating them happily.
"Maddy and I needed to brush our hair. The price of beauty, my friend."
Horatio reached over to steal some of Calleigh's fries. "I thought you said yours didn't cost a penny."
Calleigh blushed and looked over at Maddy, who was watching the exchange with a huge smile on her face, eyes sparkling. The picture she presented was made even more adorable by a small amount of ketchup on her chin. Wiping it off with a spare napkin, Calleigh looked back at Horatio, whose teasing grin had softened at her actions into an affectionate smile directed at his niece.
She kept her concentration on Maddy, chatting with the engaging girl and casting only short glances in Horatio's direction when he joined the conversation, never allowing her eyes to linger for more than a brief second before turning away again.
The meal progressed this way until Horatio made a second attempt to steal some of her fries. Calleigh swatted his hand away and moved the container so he could not reach it.
"Hey- it's not nice to keep those all to yourself," he complained. "You should share."
"You're the one who wanted a salad," she stated matter-of-factly, meeting his gaze head-on, a grin belying the piqued tone with which she had responded. "Deal with it."