Author's Notes: I'm glad this has really seemed to interest a few people and so here's the next chapter; but first you get to read/listen to my explanation of this-- a forward if you will. To be honest, when I started this fic, I wasn't sure which point of view I wanted to do this in. Eventually, I decided on first person but I couldn't decide whether to tell it through Merry or Pippin's point of view. I eventually decided on Pippin as he was always one of my favourite characters. Not because if his foolishness but because he's only a child at the beginning and this quest causes him to grow up... maybe even rather too quickly. And I always saw then that because he was forced to grow and mature so quickly that when it was all over, he tended to lapse back into his childish nature. Even in his old age, he still suffered from fears from the past... both childish and not which is what I really wanted to touch upon. (I don't know if that made any sense, did it?) As for the quote, it's from "Anastasia" and I grabbed the quote while I was writing this chapter and the song (which had been sitting somewhere in my play list) came on.

I'm also well aware that Pippin's family didn't always live in Great Smials and his father did not become the Thain until four years before Frodo, Sam, Merry, and Pippin left the Shire in their quest. However, being an author I suppose I am entitled to some artistic license and I felt it would do better... and serve my story (or at least this chapter) better if Pippin had been born into the wealthy family of the Thain instead of a farming family.

I would also alike to address the issue of Merry's age. Tolkien writes himself that Merry was indeed one hundred and two when he and Pippin left the Shire for Rohan before Eomer passed away in that year's autumn. Upon their arrival in Gondor they lived for only a few more short years. In keeping with this, 102 is indeed old for a hobbit.

As a final note, with the chaptered system and all, I find it tedious to constantly be tagging a disclaimer to every entry... so if indeed you really have to read one, you can find it in the first chapter. It'll carry through the entire story.

The Days Have Gone Down in the West

Chapter Two: Fear and Doubt

"Far away, long ago
Glowing dim as an ember
Things my heart used to know,
Once upon a December."
~ Once Upon a December; Deana Carter

Snow was falling gently outside in the yard. Foreyule had arrived and the Yule celebration was approaching. The holidays were being celebrated at Great Smials this year and the hobbit hole was near bursting with all sorts of relations. I watched as my sisters and many cousins played outside in the powdery snow. I saw Merry run behind a small tree to dodge cousin Everard's barrage of snowballs. I wanted to be out there too but a solid pane of glass was an unwelcome barrier. I pressed my nose upon the glass, almost willing myself to disappear through onto the other side.

"Pippin, come away from the window," I heard my father say. "You're fogging up the pane."

"Yes, Papa," I replied quietly and reluctantly clamored down from my chair. He was sitting at his oaken desk, quill in hand, pouring over official looking scrolls and papers. I made my way over to him, standing on the tips of my toes so as to see over the edge of the desk. "What's that, Papa?" I asked, pointing to the papers.

"Crop figures from the South Farthing," he replied. "The pipeweed was plentiful this year."

I let my eyes wander over the inked papers and envelopes sealed with the waxy Thain's seal. The bright red seals looked pretty and the intricate details of the Took arms illustrated the ancient splendor of the family. As I listened to the scratching of a quill on parchment and the crackle of fire in the hearth, I found my eyes once again wandering back towards the wintry white of the outdoors.

Oh how I longed to join my friends and relations outside in the crisp white powder. I did not wish to be kept up inside here while everyone else was out having fun. I did not know or see why Mama had sent me instead to sit with Papa inside his study. I loved spending time with my father but right now I wanted to be with Merry.

"I want to go outside," I finally wished into the silence of the still study. I tore my eyes away from where my sisters were building a snow-lad to look over at my father. His writing faltered for only a moment and he did not look up. I waited patiently but received no response. "Can't I go out?"

"I'm afraid not, Pippin," came the curt reply. I frowned when he went back to his writing.

"Why not?" I asked, my voice quavering slightly. "I have been a good lad! Why can I not go outside?"

"Pippin, you know the reason why as I have repeatedly told you on occasion," replied my father.

I frowned, disgruntled. My parents never allowed me to play outside when it got cold. They said I would get sick if I went out. Hobbits got sick all the time though. What was so different about me?

"I want to go outside!" I demanded once again, more firmly this time. I felt it would do to add to my force if I stamped my foot on the floor.

Papa calmly placed his quill aside and pushed back his chair. He looked down at me from across the desk, his gaze steady and firm. I quailed under his sight and shrank back from the desk.

"Peregrin, come here," Papa ordered. I didn't want to get close to him for I expected him to reprimand me on my undignified outburst but had no choice but to obey. Slowly I slunk over to my father. He reached down and plunked me down onto his lap. "Now, Pippin-lad, you know why you can't go outside just as well as I do."

"I might get sick," I replied quietly. I looked up at my father, trying my best to look pathetic. "But Papa, all hobbits catch cold sooner or later and you let Pearl and Pimmie and Vinca play outside in the snow. And I am sure Merry would make sure I stayed warm." Merry was always doing that sort of thing; keeping me dry in the rain, picking me up out of the mud if I fell, and protecting me from the monsters which loved to lurk beneath my bed. He would not allow me to fall ill from the winter air.

"Your sisters are different," my father explained gently, "and while I do not doubt Meriadoc always has your best interests in mind this is far from being under his control." He paused, obviously thinking of what to say next. "I've told you about the day you were born, have I not?" I nodded.

It had been a cool autumn afternoon when my mother bore me into the world. I had been early and the healer said I would probably not make it because I was so small and weak. But I had pulled through and even though the other lads my age teased me for my diminutive size, Merry stuck by me. Life had not been an easy journey for myself though, and the smallest chill in the air was often enough to keep me bed ridden. A few times the illness had been bad. I had given both my parents a bad scare and Merry had said he had thought I would be lost. I didn't quite understand but that was all behind me. I was not small and frail anymore.

"I'm a strong lad now though," I said firmly. "The cold won't hurt me."

"No doubt you're strong," smiled Papa. "You're a fine boy but, Pippin, you must realize that we don't want to dare the fates. Your mother and I want you to be safe so you can grow up to become Thain yourself. We're only doing what's best for you."

I nodded silently and leaned back against his chest. He only wanted what was right for me, even if it meant having to keep me inside from the snow. Still, I was not happy about it.

"I know I am not the greatest of company," said my father, "but I try." He turned the chair around to face the window into the fields. "So, Pippin, tell me. What do you want for Yule?"

I smiled a little more cheerfully as I watched the snow fall gently from the sky. I leaned back in my father's strong arms and closed my eyes, dwelling on the thoughts of gifts and candy which came with the Yule celebrations...

"Master Peregrin? Sir?" Startled, my eyes snapped open to behold young Rose Boffin, one of the maids in the smials. I had fallen asleep in my chair as I gazed out the window at sunset. Now the spring sun had set and the world had plunged into the tranquility of darkness. "Sir, are you all right?"

"Don't trouble yourself, Rose, I'm fine," I replied, yawning. "It seems I have had a wee bit of a nap, that is all." I stood from my chair and stretched. It was an unpleasant sensation. I could feel my joints crack and groan in agony. I grimaced but tried to hide the look of discomfort from Rose. "How is Merry?"

"Master Meriadoc has taken up house in his usual room, sir," she answered. "However, he has refused to have his possessions stored up."

"I do not doubt that," I said. "And my things?"

"Set with Master Meriadoc's near the door."

"Excellent," I said. "I think I shall retire to bed, Rose, thank you." Rose nodded, curtseyed, and left the room.

The desk was neat and in order; the Thain papers for Faramir all laid out. He had been startled when I had called him into my study and was more than a little reluctant to accept his new duties. But he was a smart hobbit and I knew the affairs of the Shire would be left in good hands with him. As I turned to leave, however, my eyes fell upon the mantle. There still hung the portrait of my father which I had always refused to take down. He looked so strong and good; a formidable Thain and a proud hobbit.

Doubt began to creep into my mind. Was going with Merry really the best thing? Or was I being selfish and merely running away? My father always wanted the best for me but was I acting in the right?

"Would you want me to go?" I asked the portrait gently. "You always said Merry kept my best interests in mind but is he still right this time? Is leaving the right thing? Or am I just running away for fear of being left behind?"

No, I was not running away. I was finally giving Faramir the position he had deserved for so long and was leaving to die not as Thain but as a warrior; as a knight of Gondor. And Merry would be with me. We would go together. My mind was made up; my will was set. I would leave tomorrow and that was final. Still, it was a shaking hand which closed the study door for the last time.

Merry's door was open but the room was dark. He always left the door open for when we were younger in case I discovered my own bed to be unsafe. I had decided it was on many occasions. I chuckled quietly to myself remembering the nightly terrors.

I moved as quickly and quietly down the hall as my little legs would allow. I saw Merry's door to be ajar and dashed inside. The room was dark but I had memorized exactly where the bed was. Wasting no time, I bounded from the floor and onto the bed, pouncing on its sleeping occupant.

"Merry!" I whispered urgently. "Merry! Merry! Merry!"

A soft moan told me my cousin was awake. "Pippin...? What is it?"

"They're back, Merry!" I squeaked. "The monsters are back! One nearly got me!"

"Oh?"

I nodded. "Uh huh. I only just managed to escape! I know the monsters don't bother you so can I stay in here? Please?"

In the dark I could just barely make out the smile which played upon my cousin's lips. I knew what his answer would be; the same answer I always received.

"Alright, Pippin, get in bed here."

"Thank you, Merry!"

Merry moved over and I settled under the blankets next to him. He always pretended to be annoyed by my intrusions but I knew better than to believe him. I know he enjoyed my company just as much as I enjoyed feeling his protective arm wrapped around me.

My room now looked large and empty. I did not keep much in here and all my clothing had been packed away and stood waiting at the door for tomorrow to come. Silently I changed into my bed clothes and slipped beneath the covers. The ghosts of a few fading embers in the hearth gave off a soft and weakened glow. The fire knew that, like myself, it had reached the end of its time and had now settled to fade away into the dark. I too would fade away and would become little more than a memory in this place. I sighed and closed my eyes, letting my thoughts wander. As I envisioned the parties, summers, and winters of the past I felt my heart sink. This bed had never felt so big and empty.