Poor, poor Inuyasha. His father had given him x amount of cash to go shopping with. Rin's birthday was in a few weeks and she'd been taking lessons from Kagome and Sango. For a full week before today, she discreetly complained about having zero clothes. When Sango and Kagome (conveniently) decided it was a good day to go shopping, Rin jumped at the opportunity. Behold the power of the puppy-dog eyes.
So of course Inuyasha (being the only available male for the afternoon. Mr. Mimori had a last minute meeting and Sesshomaru had some 'business' to attend to) got charge of the money. Not that he'd get to spend any himself...
"Inu-neechan! Thiiiiiis waaaay!"
Miroku and Sango held back a laugh as the hanyou obediently trudged in to a shop. More then likely to pay for another skirt.
"I'm so glad there's only one of you." Miroku murmured, kissing his fiancee's temple. Sango grinned.
"I'm not sure you could handle any more."
"Actually -"
"Sango c'mon!"
Sango was, quite abruptly, pulled away from her sense of warmth as Kagome dragged her away to the bridal shop.
*duel sigh*
Like the lovesick puppies they were, Miroku and Inuyasha trudged in after them. This was going to be a long day...
~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~ ~*~
Sango, for the fifth time, clawed her way out of the dressing room. How that was possible in such a puffy dress was yet to be determined...
"Eep! Sango! You look so cute!" Kagome squealed... Again... For the fifth time.
"Miroku?" She inquired.
"Mmhmm... Whatever you like dear." He sighed, indifferent. At this point, Miroku really didn't care which dress Sango chose. All he was worried about was the tiny little price tag.
Sango rolled her eyes. She wasn't about to buy her wedding dress if the man she was buying it for wouldn't even pay attention to it.
How to get attention... How to get attention..
An evil grin crossed over Sango's features and she motioned for Rin to come hither (A/N: XD I love saying that..) She did (of course) and the bride-to-be whispered in her ear. The girl smiled happily and ran off. Inuyasha opened a lazy eye and watched her go. Maybe he should have asked what she was doing but... He was too bored.
A few moments later, Rin came skipping back. She quickly pushed a hanging into the room and Sango's flushed face popped out.
"Rin!"
"What?" She asked innocently. "You told me to get the most-"
"Okay!" Sango interrupted and disappeared once again into the dressing room.
"Rin?" Kagome asked, but the girl shook her head stubbornly and sat back to watch the show.
When Sango finally reemerged from behind the door, Kagome's mouth dropped open and Rin squealed, proud of what she'd chosen.
"Inuyasha? Since my fiancee seems not to care about anything, I'll ask your opinion. What do you think of this?"
Inuyasha looked up and his mouth dropped open, much like Kagome's, before a blush spread across his cheeks. He opened and closed his mouth, but no words came out. Sango wasn't wearing a dress, that's for sure. In fact... She was hardly wearing anything.
Sango stood in the doorway of the dressing room in one of those bridal night outfits... Those outfits that aren't outfits. Nothing more then some lace tied together, and her garments were all but see-through. Inuyasha bet his ears that she was wearing a thong too...
*nose-bleed*
"Sango!" Kagome growled. If it wasn't her best friend, she probably would have killed her by now.
"Oh don't worry Kag-chan, I'm sure he won't lose too much blood."
"Yeah Kag don't worry." Inuyasha said dazed. Miroku couldn't help but get goose bumps in his sleepy stage, and it was really annoying him - this nagging feeling. Eventually he couldn't take it any longer and looked up.
It took him a few moments to realize what was before him, and he slowly directed his gaze to his 'so-called-friend' sitting next to him.
"Inuyasha, I think you can stop staring now."
"Huh? Oh yeah..." He said, a bit disappointed. 'Damn, why doesn't Kagome wear stuff like that?'
"But Inuyasha, you didn't tell me what you thought."
"Oh yeah! What I think." He pondered. Sango turned a bit, to give the undergarments more emphasis and steam began to pour from Kagome and Inuyasha's ears. One out of embarrassment, the other in anger. You guess which was who.
"Okay! Enough, nothing to see here." Miroku said hurriedly, standing up and pushing Sango back into the dressing room. "Play nice kiddies." He winked, before closing the door behind them.
The voices of Miroku and Sango could be heard from behind the door.
"Miroku what are you doing?!"
"Hmm love?"
"Miroku... HEY! Put me down! M-I-R-O-K-U!"
"Sango, darling. You don't want to be too loud now do you?"
"Mir-"
*slap*
*thunk*
A blushing Sango emerged a few moments later, fully dressed. As the door swung on it's hinges, and unconscious Miroku lay on the floor.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A handful of glares and apologies later, the two couples and Rin continued their quest to buy the world. Or at least all the clothes in it. They'd stopped at two more stores and on the third, Miroku had begun to ponder.
'I'm going to be doing this for the rest of my life! Watching and waiting while my wife puts on clothes, takes them off, puts on more, takes them off...'
Takes them off
Strips them off
Strips them
Strip
Strippers!
Excitedly, Miroku turned to Inuyasha. The sudden movement caused the hanyou to rise from his nap. Annoyed, he asked "What?"
"I was just thinking and-"
"Well that's a dangerous thought..."
"Shut up. I was thinking... What is the one thing men look forward to when they're about to get married?"
Inuyasha frowned. He wasn't very fond of riddles, "Um... The food?"
"No."
Inuyasha thought he had it this time, "The thought of spending the rest of your life with the woman you love?" (A/N: Very good Inu-chan!)
"...No"
Then again, maybe not. He took another shot. "Sex wherever and whenever you want?"
Miroku had trouble getting around this one. That was a plus to being married, but not what he was getting at. He (reluctantly) shook his head no.
"Okay then, what?"
"My man. My best man." Miroku emphasized best, putting his arm around his shoulder. "You know I love you right?"
. . .
"Get the fuck off me!" Inuyasha yelled panicked, pushing his cousin away. "Man! And all this time I thought you were straight! What'll Sango think?!"
Miroku sighed at the look of horror on his cousin's face. "I'm not gay and it's called platonic love, you moron. You're like a brother to me."
"Oh... Good." He sighed. Inuyasha had no problem with homosexuality.... As long as it had nothing to do with him. "So what were you hinting at before?"
Miroku lowered his voice as though the world's biggest secret was about to be told. In a way, it kind of was. "Inuyasha, the one thing a man looks forward to-" he paused when Kagome and Rin walked past. Probably to find more clothes to dress Sango in. " - is the bachelors party."
Realization peaked on Inuyasha's face, then a bit of panic. "Who sets that up?"
Miroku's eyes widened in disbelief and perhaps... Fear? "The best man."
"Me."
"Yes. You. You did set it up... Didn't you?"
"Oh sure. Of course. I planned that thing ages ago." He lied.
"And you got -entertainment- right?"
Inuyasha gave him a blank stare and Miroku took a controlled breath, grasping the hanyou's shoulders. "Strippers?"
Almost as if summoned, Sango came out of her little dressing room in a pair of black hip huggers, a corset top, and a pair of high-heeled boots.. With her eyes narrowed and fixed on Miroku, she looked a bit.... Scary.
"Uh... Rin and Kagome went that way."
"Mmhmm..."
Miroku shifted uncomfortably. "Is something wrong honey?"
"Promise me."
"Promise what dearest?" Miroku got a sinking feeling at the bottom of his stomach. Should he be worried?
"You were talking about the bachelors party.... Weren't you." Sango pressed. She was more accusing then forming a question.
"What would make you say that?"
"No strippers."
Miroku winced but nodded. He really didn't want to know what those boots felt like when they were digging into his stomach... Oh well. He'd just have to settle for second best.
"No dancers."
Now that was going a bit too far! Miroku turned to Inuyasha for back up, but his 'friend' had somehow managed to escape, abandoning Miroku. Figures. So this is what despair was like.
"Anything else dear?" He asked in a broken voice.
"No scantly clad females of any kind." Sango decided. After a moment's thought, she added to the sentence. "In fact, since it's a bachelors party, no women at all."
Miroku by then was in a state similar to that of shock. His mouth opened and closed, but it was futile. He couldn't say anything. This woman had just crushed the one thing he had to live for in life!
Sango smiled, suddenly cheerful. "I love you!" She said, kissed Miroku on this nose, and skipped back into the dressing room.
"Ha! You lap dog!" Inuyasha laughed from behind the chair. So that was where he scampered off to...
"Said the kettle to the pot."
"Huh?"
"Ever hear of Karma, Inuyasha? What goes around comes around?"
Inuyasha looked confused for a moment, before realization once again hit him. His eyes narrowed.
"You wouldn't!"
-------------------------------------------------------
*nervous cough while gathering some ingredients* Well, that was a long wait *mixes contents of the bottles together* How long exactly? *sticks a mop into it, it sizzles slightly* a little under three months? *takes mop out* yeah... *scrubs off the mold and decay*
I luffle my beta-reader *huggles Margo-chan to death* whom without, there would most likely have been no update. O.o It's amazing what constant badgering, bribes, threats and that awful Digihammer will do x.x I got the whole bachelors idea from her. O.o she's the Ff.net Einstein.
It's my day with Touchestone XD
Kikyou bashing songs..... Heehee *goes around singing them* XD