Chapter 8
The KaibaCorp. executive board (And Mai) looked in on Kaiba. He had abandoned his desk, and was sitting on the floor in a ring of lit candles, singing Kum-bai-yah in his slurred, drunken voice. Sporadically, he would jump to his feet, swearing like he was possessed by Satan and smashing things at random. Other times he would sit in a crumpled heap in the corner, crying like a baby for several minutes. But always he would end these fits by grabbing a bottle from by his desk, slugging it down, and singing.
He couldn't sing very well, especially when he was drunk.
Suddenly he stood up. "GET IN HERE, NOW! ALL OF YOU!" He roared at the top of his lungs.
The crowd outside the door shuffled in nervously, and Kaiba looked at them all slyly. Oh, they thought they were smart. They thought they were clever. THEY THOUGHT THEY COULD PULL THE WOOL OVER THE EYES OF SETO KAIBA! But his last executive board had thought they were smart, too, and look where they'd ended up. Oh, these fools would regret what they had done, and HE KNEW THEY HAD DONE IT! But they couldn't have his deck, not his, because it WASN'T THEIRS. It was HIS. As simple as this seemed to him, he realized they might not understand it. But he'd have to make them. That chick in the leather was really hot.
"Gentlemen. A duelist's deck is an important thing. What you lying, greedy, bastards don't seem to realize, is that my deck is MINE. It isn't yours. Knowing this, you simply have to give it back. Now I realize that this might sound like a revelation to all of you. I know it was a revelation to me. But really, when you think about it, it makes perfect sense. You cannot have my deck because it isn't yours. Now please give it back."
"Sir, we didn't take your…" one of them spoke up.
"LIAR! YOU ARE A LYING, CHEATING, GREEDY, EVIL GROUP OF JEALOUS, SELF-SERVING, DECK-STEALING BASTARDS!"
"Now sir, we've been far too busy preparing your tournament to have stolen anything. And, might I add, it's going to be starting on time, the largest affair since…"
"Tournament?" Kaiba laughed, a high-pitched, decidedly unstable giggle. "Do you think I give a damn about the tournament? The tournament is off! And I don't have time for your excuses! GIVE ME MY GODDAMN DECK!"
"Now, sir, we would NEVER steal your Hitotsu-me giant." Another board member said, thinking quickly. "Or your…"
"… Crush Card." Kaiba finished, his eyes glazing over. "My… La Jinn the Mystical Genie of the Lamp, my bl… my bl… my…"
"Blue Eyes White Dragons?"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
The
board members stepped back out in the hall, while Mai stayed behind to comfort
Kaiba. Apparently he wasn't COMPLETELY
oblivious, because he stopped crying like a wuss.
The board members looked to each other in disgust. "That guy is a DISGRACE! We should just get rid of him!" one of them (For convenience he'll be #1) said.
"YEAH! If we kill him, then we can use Mokuba as a figurehead, and run KaibaCorp. ourselves!" #2 proclaimed.
"HOLD IT! Do you guys remember what happened to the last guys who tried that?" #3 reminded them.
All five of them visibly paled.
"I remember. All that blood, and the screaming…" #4 recalled, a haunted look on his face.
"And the FIRE. And those tweezers…" #1 continued, looking nauseous.
"And the SCREAMING!" #4 shouted, looking terrified at the mere memory.
"And the leeches… especially after the acid, the leeches came after the acid…" #2 recalled.
"You see? We can't try to get rid of him, because if we screw up…" #3 trailed off.
"I don't want to think about it." #4 agreed fervently.
"If we can't get rid of him, we need to cure him. We need to find that deck!" #1 decided.
"… Hey, I just had a great idea!" #2 declared. "If that tournament is cancelled, we have ten million dollars just sitting around! We can offer that as the reward to anyone who finds the deck!"
"It's settled, then." #3 proclaimed. "We'll make the announcement tomorrow, when the last of the duelists arrive. $10,000,000 for Master Kaiba's deck!"
!!