Dedication: This chapter is for the wonderful Julia/Chriss who has helped me beyond belief by providing me much information on the subject of (illegal) drugs and how they affect alters and people with DID. Also for everybody at fragmentedminds, you guys are amazing. Keep your spirits up, guys.

"Rog?"

//'Do it. Just do it, come on, you know that you want to.' 'No, don't listen, don't you dare! It affects all of us, even the littles. You can't expose them to this.' 'Yeah, please no. We no likes that stuff! It's scary.'//

"Roger?"

//'Remember how good it feels… I need it. You need it.' 'No!'//

"Roger!"

Someone's shaking me, hard. Suddenly my body gives a little shudder and I snap my eyes open, panting heavily. I hadn't realized that I had been holding my breath throughout the internal conversation. Trying to focus and drown out the commotion in my head, I look up at Mark, his hands still resting on my shoulders.

"Sorry… what?"

His expression looks like a mix between frustration and concern, his voice a connotation of anger and hurt. "I wanted to know what Maureen wanted."

Ah, that's right. The disastrous phone call, the event that triggered this current battle of the minds.

I close my eyes again, bringing my hands up to massage my aching temples. I don't want to talk about this. I don't want to think about this.

"Roger?"

Mark's voice now sounds frantic. He probably thinks I'm spacing out again, so I open my eyes once again and give him a tiny smile that even I'm sure doesn't reach my eyes.

"Roger, please. You've been out of it all afternoon… What happened?"

//We've been out of it a hell of a lot longer than "all afternoon", Marky.//

"Maureen said that we – uh, I – can't see Monty anymore," I say quietly, a slight sigh emanating from my mouth.

Mark looks shocked, though he tries to hide the surprise from showing on his face.

"What? Why not?"

I shrug, looking away and focusing my attention on a large, purplish grape juice stain on the worn rug beneath my feet.

"That's horrible," Mark continues, "I'm going to call her… How can she do that? Does Joanne know?"

"It was Joanne's idea," I say simply, shrugging, and then walking away and into my room. I know why the couple did what they did, and to be honest, I can't say that I blame them. Monty is just barely six, he shouldn't have to be exposed to my craziness.

Lying down on my bed, the voice of David once again echoes throughout my mind.

//'You need it, Rog, you can't live without that stuff. Especially now, now that everyone's abandoned us.' 'No, that's not true, we still have Mark!' 'Yeah, and how long do you think he's gonna stay, huh? You think he won't get sick of this shit?'//

As much as I hate to admit it… David's right. I hate him, I absolutely loathe him for making the cravings come back, for making the withdrawal symptoms I've always feared and hated return ever so slightly. And I hate him for being right.

Deciding to take a walk to clear my mind, I rise from my bed and pull on my leather jacket.

"Where are you going?" Mark eyes me from the couch, and I can tell from his expression that he's angry about my walking out of the conversation before.

//Always running away.//

I shrug, not really knowing myself. "Don't know," I reply casually, and then walk out of the apartment without waiting for a response.

The second I am out the main door of the building, I feel my body give a tiny shudder, and instantly my posture changes from utterly self-conscious and unsure, to confident and cocky. I begin to swagger, and from the way I now ooze self-confidence, I can tell that David is out.

From the foggy place in the back of my mind, I can see myself traveling down a vaguely familiar path.

//'Where are we going?' 'I don't know.' 'I recognize this place…'//

Suddenly I feel somebody's presence behind me, and David turns around, flashing an arrogant smile at the man wrapped in a large overcoat.

//'Oh shit.' 'Somebody do something!' 'Don't let him do this, stop him. Now!'//

I try to claw my way back to reality, cursing David in my mind, but he is determined to stay in control, and I can't do a damned thing about it.

With an air of superiority to match David's, the nameless person in front of us reaches into a pocket inside his oversized coat and strokes something that we cannot yet see, though David and I know all too well what it is.

"Long time no see, Cutiepie. So what'll it be?"

Notes: Hah, I know, I'm so evil to leave you hanging here. :}  I couldn't help myself, sorry! I think I know where I'm going to go with this now, so hopefully it won't be too long before the next update. Thanks again for all the reviews, I love to know what you guys think. ^_^