Just You and Me
By: Me, Emily.
Summary: It was 1942, and my life was about to change forever.
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I simply use them for enjoyment and in no way claim to own them. I also did not write the song, "I Love You," by Sarah McLachlan.
Rating: PG-13… won't get too much higher, because I really don't like writing any type of smut and wouldn't be good at it.
Author Notes: Okay, so I actually wrote this chapter prior to posting the first one, so I'll post it not matter what. My creative juices were flowing… but that doesn't mean this is good. I also wrote this and edited it myself, so there are probably a few grammatical and spelling errors, so please disregard them! This chapter also involves more of Susan, Elizabeth, and Mark… I'm trying to add in some other characters so hopefully there will be more of an interest in my writing.
*
I have a smile,
stretched from ear to ear.
To see you walking down the road,
we meet at the lights.
I stare for a while,
the world around disappears.
*
I went back inside the hall to discover Susan had left, and I had a pretty good idea where she had went. I noticed Chuck wasn't there either. Across the room, I spotted Elizabeth and the man who she was dancing with, Mark, I believed Doug called him. She saw me also, and waved me down.
I walked over and found them laughing.
"Carol!" she shouted.
I could tell she was barely sober, "So Elizabeth, have a few drinks tonight?" I asked with a smile.
"I tried to stop her, warned her that she would have a terrible hangover, but she insisted." Mark said. "I'm Mark." He said extended handing.
"Carol." I said shaking his hand. "Thank you so much for taking care of Elizabeth, I went out for a bite to eat and…"
"I know; I saw you and Doug."
"Yeah, we went to this place called Doc Magoo's, I'd never been there before. Guess I shouldn't have left her here. You wouldn't have seen my friend Susan have you?"
"She left with that Chuck guy. Said she would be back later, but hasn't. I think they were going to her place if you know what I mean." He said smiling.
"Yeah, yeah, I think that was her goal tonight." I turned back to Elizabeth who was getting ready to order another round of drinks and decided that I should get her back to her apartment; maybe I would just stay there.
"Would you umm, mind helping me get Elizabeth back to her apartment. I can make a pot of coffee or something and see if she sobers up a bit. Wouldn't want you to get the wrong idea of her." I said with a laugh.
"It's okay, we had fun. Most everyone orders too many drinks at these things, after a few hangovers, you know what's your limit."
Putting an arm around Elizabeth, he practically dragged her out of the place; I found the whole situation quite amusing though. Elizabeth, Susan, and I had only gone out drinking a few times, but never had we gotten drunk, except once, but we were all so wasted, none of us could remember what happened. Somehow we all ended up at Susan's.
Gathering our coats, I checked my pocket to make sure Doug's number was still in there and found the number still tucked in right where I put it. Throwing the coat on over myself, I began to walk towards the outside where I saw Mark and Elizabeth. I handed her, her coat and then showed Mark where her apartment was.
We made it inside, after a much amusing walk with Elizabeth, and Mark set her down on her bed. He came out into the kitchen where I was making a pot of coffee.
I poured two cups and handed him one.
Sitting down, I began to talk to him. He was nice and I liked him a lot. I could see he and Doug joining our little threesome of friends every so often for a drink or something.
"So, you like Elizabeth?" I asked with a grin.
"She's really rambunctious, but I do like her. Although, I've never seen someone down so many drinks in so little time." He said with a laugh.
"We don't go drinking much, but when we do, she and Susan drink a lot."
"And what about you?"
"No, not me, I was never fond of achohol. Plus, if I have to go home, my mother seeing me trashed is not my idea of fun." I said.
"Still live with your parents?"
"Just my mother."
"Oh." He looked at his watch, "Jeez, it's almost midnight. I should really be getting home, I just wish I could say good-bye. Do you think if you gave me her number she would get mad?"
"No, not at all." Writing it down for him, he smiled gratefully and said good-bye. I went into Elizabeth's bedroom to find her heavily asleep on her bed, and I rummaged through her drawers looking for something that comfortable that she had borrowed from me. I finally found pajama's and went into the bathroom and changed.
Walking out into her living room, I found a blanket and got myself comfortable on the couch. I thought about calling Susan, but decided to just do it in the morning. Shutting my eyes, I discovered myself falling into a peaceful slumber, dreaming about the night's events.
*
Just you and me,
on this island of hope.
A breath between us could be miles.
Let me surround you,
my sea to your shore.
Let me be the calm you seek.
*
The next day was a bit hectic. After catching up with Susan, the three of us had lunch to talk about the previous night. I brought them to Doc Magoo's.
"Okay, so Susan, tell us about this Chuck!" Elizabeth said excited.
"Well," she said getting our interest, "he's like the sweetest guy I've ever met in my life." Then she paused.
"And the best sex!"
"You little slut!" Elizabeth exclaimed jokingly, "Did you really last night?"
"Yep." She said proudly.
"I wish I could be like you Susan." I stated.
The truth was, I did. After spending that hour with Doug, I had never desired a man so much in my life. Reality though was beginning to set in, the fact of the matter was I hadn't talked to John in almost two days and I was going to have to. But I couldn't say a word about Doug, he would get jealous.
And I wondered.
Somehow, I questioned my commitment to John. It was odd, I hadn't even kissed Doug, he had only given me a kiss on the cheek and yet I felt as if I had cheated on John. Making because the kiss symbolized something more then just a friendly acquaintance, there was a fire that burned between us. We had so much chemistry, Doug and I.
Most of the things I had talked to him about, I never knew I was really thinking them. I was just talking about what was ever spilling out my mouth, about my father, and feeling lost. I hadn't even told Susan or Elizabeth I had felt this way, yet this total stranger knew all this.
But he didn't seem like a stranger to me.
"Carol, come on! You're engaged, to someone wealthy, someone who is going to give you a good life! You would give that up for one wild night?" she asked.
At the time, I didn't quite understand the reverse psychology she was doing, I don't even know if she realized she was doing it, but I felt the words, "I guess," come right out of my mouth.
Elizabeth intervened when there was a moment of silence, "What did you think of Mark, Carol?" she asked. I could tell she was very interested in my opinion. "I noticed that he left his number, did you give him mine?" She was like a little kid on Christmas.
"I did give him your number." I said smiling. "I talked to him, he seems like a great guy, I think that you should go for it."
The rest of lunch, we continued to talk girl talk, but I just couldn't get my mind off of Doug.
I went home and found my mother and John sitting at the kitchen table with papers laid out all over.
"Carol! Where have you been?" My mother asked.
I quickly thought; she would be suspicious if she knew that it was just me who stayed at Elizabeth's and not Susan also. I could hear the questions now, 'What happened to Susan?' or 'Where did you go?'
"Well, Susan and I ended up meeting up with Elizabeth last night and staying at her apartment. And then, we woke up and got ready and went out to lunch."
"Where's your ring?" John asked gesturing towards my hand.
Shit! My ring, what was I going to say? I finally thought of something, "I left it in my room last night, I was applying lotion to my hands and forgot to put it back on. Will you excuse me for a moment? I want to change out of these clothes, we didn't get a chance to come home and get fresh clothes last night."
I walked into my bedroom and reached in my coat pocket and found Doug's number. I took it and went into my closet, where I found a box. I had put things that were special to me since I was little in this box, and place the number inside.
Then I stuck it back on the shelf.
*
Oh and every time I'm close to you,
there's too much I can't say.
And you just walk away,
and I forgot to tell you,
I love you.
*
"Two-hundred people?" I asked in amazement.
"Something wrong?" John asked.
I glanced over the list of people, "John, I don't even know two-hundred people. Who is Herbert Johnson?"
"A son of a colleague of my father's." John said.
I sighed. My mother had left twenty minutes ago to go grocery shopping and I was overwhelmed with what had been done with the wedding. How had all of this been planned without me? Wasn't it supposed to be my wedding?
"Now tell me why we're inviting him?" I asked.
"Because I went to his."
"So?!?! John,
two-hundred people is ridiculous! This
is my wedding too! It's supposed to be special and intimate, not some big show
for a bunch of people I don't know to come to and socialize. It's supposed to be a celebration of our
marriage, not a get together for all these people I don't know, so they can
criticize the food and the way the church is set up."
"Well Carol, I have an obligation to invite certain people."
"But why? You don't even know them, who cares if they come?"
"That's how things work with my family."
"Right, your family has all the money so they decide everything. Well I can't take it anymore. A marriage is a partnership, two people working together, and if we're going to make this work, I need you to work with me and think about what I want, not what my or your family wants. I know you feel like you have to do certain things, but you don't! This is your life, not your mother or father's so start living your life."
Frustrated, I decided that I was tired.
"Look, I was up late last night with Elizabeth and Susan, do you think we can do this tomorrow night or something?"
"Yeah, sure." He said annoyed. He grabbed his jacket and walked out the door. I walked into my bedroom and threw myself on my bed. My mind was so distracted. Going into my closet, I searched for what I was looking for.
Out in the living room I dialed the numbered scribbled on the piece of paper.
"Hello?"
"Doug?" I asked.
"Hey Carol. Figure out a time we can have lunch next week?"
"Umm, not exactly. What about tonight, dinner?" I asked anxiously. It was a bit forward, but I really wanted to talk to him. I needed to talk to him, after last night, I thought he would make a difference and help.
"Uhh, sure. Where do you want to meet?" he asked.
"I don't know, down by Doc Magoo's and we can decide to go somewhere from there around 6:00?"
"Sounds good." My voice must have sounded shaky, because then he asked, "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'll be fine."
Hanging up the phone, I felt a quiet satisfaction build inside of me.
I look myself over in the mirror for the hundredth time, and felt as happy with how I look as I as going to. After putting on my jacket and I scribbled a note down, for my mother so she did not wonder where I was.
Ma,
I went to Susan's again tonight. I know, two nights in a row, but I'm a big girl. We're going out so don't expect to get a hold of me if you try to call, who knows we may even end up at Elizabeth's again. I'll see you tomorrow.
And please also, don't talk to John anymore about the wedding until you and I talk about it.
-Carol
While it was a little harsh, I didn't care. I was so aggravated by the whole circumstances of the wedding, I was getting ready not to show up. Taking my key and stuffing it in my pocket, I grabbed my little bag and headed over to Susan's to ask her a favor before I met Doug.
*
And the night's too long,
and cold here without you.
I grieve in my condition,
for I cannot find the strength to say I need you so
*
I knocked on the door and heard the bolts unlock, "Carol! What are you doing here?"
"I need to ask you a favor."
"Sure."
"If my mother calls, tell her I'm here. And you don't mind if I crash in the extra bedroom tonight, do you?"
"Of course not, but what's going on?" she asked with much curiosity in her voice.
"Look, I don't have time right now, but I'll tell you later, okay?"
"Yeah, that's fine." I walked in and threw a bunch of stuff that was scrunched up in my small bag on the chair in the bedroom.
"Thanks, I owe you a million."
"Two million!" She yelled out the door.
Walking down the street towards Doc Magoo's, I spotted Doug's figure. He looked exactly like he had last night when I had walked out of the hall. I smiled to myself, and noted that he was wearing regular street clothes as I approached him.
"Hey." I said. I wasn't sure how to act, overly excited, emotional, or just like everything was fine.
"So, where do you want to go?" he asked.
"I don't know, somewhere that we can talk?" I asked hopefully.
"Ah, so you're just using me as an excuse to get out of your house?" he asked with a laugh.
"Pretty much." I replied jokingly.
Putting an arm around my shoulder, he guided in a direction, "Okay, I have the perfect place." Neither of us at first noticed we had began holding hands after he dropped his arm, it just happened naturally, it seemed to be right.
We arrived at a small Italian restaurant that looked like the exact place I wanted to go. "It's perfect." I said as we walked in.
"Thought you would like it."
After being seated I found myself overwhelmed with where to start. "So, something happen tonight?" he asked reading my mind once more.
So I started from the beginning and just continued to spill my heart to him again. "And now, the guest list is over two-hundred, the church is so big I could fit double the size of the amount of people we're inviting, and I don't know why I'm doing this anymore." I felt a tear stain my face and he quickly brushed it away with his thumb.
When our dinner arrived, I decided to change the conversation; I didn't want to get anymore into detail, because I was afraid what else I would reveal. Once again, he insisted on paying the bill, which I tried to object to, but he was stubborn and wouldn't let me pay.
"Are you going back to your mother's tonight?" he asked while we walked towards the direction of Susan's apartment. His hand had somehow found mine for a second time and neither of us noticed.
"No, Susan's. My mother, would just, interrogate me about everything, convince me to go along with it, but it's not what I want. I don't even know what I want anymore." Once again the tears resurfaced and he wiped them away.
The snow had begun to fall, which wasn't unusual considering it was the beginning of December in Chicago, but we both seemed to be oblivious to what was happening around us.
"Listen to me, it's going to be okay, it will work okay." I looked up towards him, and I felt the chemistry that had been lingering between us all night reach its climax. Slowly I leaned towards him and pressed my lips upon his.
It was everything I imagined it would be, like the princess meeting her prince in all of the books I had read. All thoughts of the wedding, John Tagliari, my mother, and everything else occupying my mind escaped. Everything but him.
Slowly pulling away, his forehead touched mine.
"Carol, you shouldn't be doing this. I wouldn't want you to get yourself into a bigger mess." He said softly. "I wouldn't want anything to happen to you."
"I don't care." I murmured and pulled his face to mine once more. "I have never done anything outside the box before, and you are most definitely outside of the box, and I like it." I whispered to him and felt his lips reach mine once more.
"Let's not doing anything tonight, let me walk you back to Susan's."
So he wrapped his arm around my waist and walked me to her building. Walking me up the steps I kissed him again, it felt as if I was addicted. Doug Ross was going to be my bad habit, my addiction. "Meet me back here tomorrow night at 9:00, I'll sneak out."
"Okay."
One last kiss to satisfy my taste buds for the night and he disappeared.
Doug Ross wasn't my bad habit though, he was just my addiction.
*
Oh and every time I'm close to you,
there's too much I can't say,
And you just walk away.
And I forgot to tell you,
I love you,
And the night's too long
and cold here without you.
*
Ah, you've gotten this far, won't you leave me something?
Thank you to my TWO reviewers, you guys gave me the courage to post my this chapter, and of course, thanks to the gals at the AOL boards… you rock =)
Till I write once more,
- Emily