Sara got to work as soon as she could.
"Where have you been? You're late!" shouted Grissom.
Grissom and Catherine were walking up.
"I know, I know! I'm sorry! I had a family emergency!" Sara fumbled.
"Is it your mom?" Grissom asked concerned.
"No! No! - Oh Grissom! - My life is over!. My life was just too perfect - I knew it would come to bite me!" Sara broke into floods of tears.
"Come on! Come on! - You're in no state to work! Go home!. Do you want to talk first?. Do you want to come in my office?" Grissom asked.
Sara looked at him. They'd all have to know about Alaney anyway if she stayed - and it didn't really matter if they knew about her.
"Can I talk to you both?. Or Catherine at least?" Sara asked.
"Me?" Catherine asked. Sara nodded.
"All 3 of us can talk - we have 45 minutes maximum though".
They all sat in Grissom's office. Catherine and Grissom eager to know what was wrong.
"When I was fourteen, this newborn baby just suddenly appeared one day in our community. No one wanted to own up to knowing who the parents were and ever since there has been various rumours as to her paternity and how she came to be dumped on our community. She became the community's responsibility and for a while she was passed from family to family and friend to friend but eventually my aunt Miranda agreed to take her in as her own - everything was fine - until today! - her name is Alaney - she's 18. Well, she turned up on my doorstep today!. Miranda has abandoned her and dumped her on me!. There's no one else who can look after her!. Only me!. But I can't be a mother figure!. I wouldn't know where to begin!. I don't have the time! the skills! the patience! - I don't even have a maternal instinct!. But it looks like it will have to be me and it's going to ruin my life! - MY LIFE IS OVER!!" sobbed Sara.
"Can't your parents look after her instead if your so upset?" suggested Grissom.
"NO!. It's too dangerous!. The place where we grew up is just too dangerous - she should never have been there in the first place now I think about it!. But now she's older - it's just more and more dangerous!. She can't stay anywhere in camp cuckoo!" rebuked Sara.
Grissom and Catherine looked concerned at each other. Catherine took Sara's hand and said
"Having kids is wonderful - I'm sure in no time you will be reaping the advantages!. It's the best feeling in the world having a kid. Just the way they look at you makes it all worthwhile!".
"Catherine, I'm not like you. It's different for you. You had nine months to decide. I have had no time!. You wanted a child!. I don't want a child. I wouldn't get pregnant!. If I did, well frankly I'd abort it! - That is how strongly I feel about this!. I'm a career woman - I don't have time for kids!" argued Sara.
"I'm in just the same career as you, Sara - and admittedly maybe I don't have as much time for Lindsay as she needs - but I still cope, Sara - I cope in this job and so can you!" suggested Catherine.
"I don't want to cope!" screamed Sara.
"Well tough!", shouted Catherine quite annoyed, "Your all you, you, you Sara!. We're talking about a human being here!. A girl who's never felt she had a place - and all you can think about is your luxuries, Sara - when she's fighting for her survival!. If you're the only choice Sara then you have no choice. I'm sorry to be so blunt Sara - but get over yourself sweetie!. But! - I can assure you it isn't all sacrifice - the advantages will out weigh the cons - just wait and see! - now I'm sorry but I've got to go get on with my work - I hope you make the right decision" Catherine reacted.
Catherine stormed out.
"She thinks I'm terrible - and I am - I'm a terrible person - which is why I can't look after a child!. She's fragile and needs a stable love and care over her - and I can't give it to her" Sara sobbed.
Grissom took Sara's hand and looked her in the eye.
"I know it will be hard Sara - but I can understand how you feel - I'm a man - and it's always happening in the movies isn't it!. The kid turns up on some career orientated bachelor's doorstep one day and announces they are their child and they move in and rearrange the dad's life - but in the end they prefer the child. And when the child came the father didn't run about shouting 'Turn the child away'. I don't mean to be against you, Sara, I'm just saying calm down. Take a jump and dive into this situation - It sounds like you have no choice!. So accept it!" Grissom said.
Grissom paused and said "What's that Nicholas Cage movie I saw?. He wakes up one day to find he has a family instead of being a rich bachelor. It's like what I'm saying!. He chooses his family!. What's it called?" Grissom said.
"You mean 'Family man'?. You watched that?. But Grissom that is the movies - all fairytales and niceness" replied Sara.
"This could be really good for your career actually!. Remember how I said that you needed something outside work to make sure everything isn't personal - and I said Catherine had Lindsay - well now you could have Alaney!. Perfect!" Grissom said.
"It is not perfect!" Sara shouted.
For one of the few times in his life Grissom didn't know what else to say. So Sara continued,
"It isn't just the practicalities. I mean she is 18 and she can basically look after herself - and technically I have the money - and that's the one thing I don't mind giving her!. And she's going to university next year so she won't be staying more than till September - the practicals aren't really the problem".
Sara paused, took a deep breath and continued "I'm scared! - I'm scared because of something else!".
"I knew there was something else" Grissom added intrigued.
Sara turned to Grissom and looked him in the eye. She knew she couldn't say too much.
"I'm scared! - Scared that I might fall in love with her!" Sara said.
"What's wrong with falling in love with her?. That's great!. See you do have maternal instinct!" Grissom added.
"I'm scared I'll fall in love with her and she'll take over my life - and I won't be able to give her up - she won't just go to university and that's it - I'll want to keep her coming home to me - and she wants that!. And - And - I'm scared I'll fall in love with her and I'll end up telling her who her parents are just to make her happy - and - everyone - especially my parents!. Will kill me for telling her!" Sara sobbed.
"But why?. Why does it matter?. What's it even got to do with your parents?" said Grissom.
"It's complicated - but I just can't tell her - it may ruin everything for everyone - it may break up their community - and my parents would kill me!. And even if I told Alaney who her parents were - which I would end up doing if I love her too much!. Then she may end up hating people or being unhappy from the news!" said Sara.
"On top of that - I'm scared that if I fall too much in love with her then I'll want to compromise my career for her - for example, I may be late sometimes - all because of a problem she's caused" said Sara.
"Sara, I'd understand. Catherine has a daughter and I understand that - and anyway Sara - you already have relationships in your life which can cause you problems - you didn't choose your mum's bad health but it affects your work attendance - but I understand - because it's natural - and because it can happen to anyone of us!" Grissom said.
"I can't tell you what to do Sara - and I don't know if you'll fall in love with her or not - I can only give you advice as a friend - and my advice is - jump in the deep end and give it a go" Grissom concluded.
He finished by looking her straight in the eyes, concerned.
"It's more complicated than you or Catherine understand - but I have no choice - I've got to take her in!" said Sara.
There was silence for a few seconds as she gathered her thoughts.
"Now, do you want me to drive you home?" Grissom asked.
Sara nodded. She wasn't in a state to drive any further.
"Where have you been? You're late!" shouted Grissom.
Grissom and Catherine were walking up.
"I know, I know! I'm sorry! I had a family emergency!" Sara fumbled.
"Is it your mom?" Grissom asked concerned.
"No! No! - Oh Grissom! - My life is over!. My life was just too perfect - I knew it would come to bite me!" Sara broke into floods of tears.
"Come on! Come on! - You're in no state to work! Go home!. Do you want to talk first?. Do you want to come in my office?" Grissom asked.
Sara looked at him. They'd all have to know about Alaney anyway if she stayed - and it didn't really matter if they knew about her.
"Can I talk to you both?. Or Catherine at least?" Sara asked.
"Me?" Catherine asked. Sara nodded.
"All 3 of us can talk - we have 45 minutes maximum though".
They all sat in Grissom's office. Catherine and Grissom eager to know what was wrong.
"When I was fourteen, this newborn baby just suddenly appeared one day in our community. No one wanted to own up to knowing who the parents were and ever since there has been various rumours as to her paternity and how she came to be dumped on our community. She became the community's responsibility and for a while she was passed from family to family and friend to friend but eventually my aunt Miranda agreed to take her in as her own - everything was fine - until today! - her name is Alaney - she's 18. Well, she turned up on my doorstep today!. Miranda has abandoned her and dumped her on me!. There's no one else who can look after her!. Only me!. But I can't be a mother figure!. I wouldn't know where to begin!. I don't have the time! the skills! the patience! - I don't even have a maternal instinct!. But it looks like it will have to be me and it's going to ruin my life! - MY LIFE IS OVER!!" sobbed Sara.
"Can't your parents look after her instead if your so upset?" suggested Grissom.
"NO!. It's too dangerous!. The place where we grew up is just too dangerous - she should never have been there in the first place now I think about it!. But now she's older - it's just more and more dangerous!. She can't stay anywhere in camp cuckoo!" rebuked Sara.
Grissom and Catherine looked concerned at each other. Catherine took Sara's hand and said
"Having kids is wonderful - I'm sure in no time you will be reaping the advantages!. It's the best feeling in the world having a kid. Just the way they look at you makes it all worthwhile!".
"Catherine, I'm not like you. It's different for you. You had nine months to decide. I have had no time!. You wanted a child!. I don't want a child. I wouldn't get pregnant!. If I did, well frankly I'd abort it! - That is how strongly I feel about this!. I'm a career woman - I don't have time for kids!" argued Sara.
"I'm in just the same career as you, Sara - and admittedly maybe I don't have as much time for Lindsay as she needs - but I still cope, Sara - I cope in this job and so can you!" suggested Catherine.
"I don't want to cope!" screamed Sara.
"Well tough!", shouted Catherine quite annoyed, "Your all you, you, you Sara!. We're talking about a human being here!. A girl who's never felt she had a place - and all you can think about is your luxuries, Sara - when she's fighting for her survival!. If you're the only choice Sara then you have no choice. I'm sorry to be so blunt Sara - but get over yourself sweetie!. But! - I can assure you it isn't all sacrifice - the advantages will out weigh the cons - just wait and see! - now I'm sorry but I've got to go get on with my work - I hope you make the right decision" Catherine reacted.
Catherine stormed out.
"She thinks I'm terrible - and I am - I'm a terrible person - which is why I can't look after a child!. She's fragile and needs a stable love and care over her - and I can't give it to her" Sara sobbed.
Grissom took Sara's hand and looked her in the eye.
"I know it will be hard Sara - but I can understand how you feel - I'm a man - and it's always happening in the movies isn't it!. The kid turns up on some career orientated bachelor's doorstep one day and announces they are their child and they move in and rearrange the dad's life - but in the end they prefer the child. And when the child came the father didn't run about shouting 'Turn the child away'. I don't mean to be against you, Sara, I'm just saying calm down. Take a jump and dive into this situation - It sounds like you have no choice!. So accept it!" Grissom said.
Grissom paused and said "What's that Nicholas Cage movie I saw?. He wakes up one day to find he has a family instead of being a rich bachelor. It's like what I'm saying!. He chooses his family!. What's it called?" Grissom said.
"You mean 'Family man'?. You watched that?. But Grissom that is the movies - all fairytales and niceness" replied Sara.
"This could be really good for your career actually!. Remember how I said that you needed something outside work to make sure everything isn't personal - and I said Catherine had Lindsay - well now you could have Alaney!. Perfect!" Grissom said.
"It is not perfect!" Sara shouted.
For one of the few times in his life Grissom didn't know what else to say. So Sara continued,
"It isn't just the practicalities. I mean she is 18 and she can basically look after herself - and technically I have the money - and that's the one thing I don't mind giving her!. And she's going to university next year so she won't be staying more than till September - the practicals aren't really the problem".
Sara paused, took a deep breath and continued "I'm scared! - I'm scared because of something else!".
"I knew there was something else" Grissom added intrigued.
Sara turned to Grissom and looked him in the eye. She knew she couldn't say too much.
"I'm scared! - Scared that I might fall in love with her!" Sara said.
"What's wrong with falling in love with her?. That's great!. See you do have maternal instinct!" Grissom added.
"I'm scared I'll fall in love with her and she'll take over my life - and I won't be able to give her up - she won't just go to university and that's it - I'll want to keep her coming home to me - and she wants that!. And - And - I'm scared I'll fall in love with her and I'll end up telling her who her parents are just to make her happy - and - everyone - especially my parents!. Will kill me for telling her!" Sara sobbed.
"But why?. Why does it matter?. What's it even got to do with your parents?" said Grissom.
"It's complicated - but I just can't tell her - it may ruin everything for everyone - it may break up their community - and my parents would kill me!. And even if I told Alaney who her parents were - which I would end up doing if I love her too much!. Then she may end up hating people or being unhappy from the news!" said Sara.
"On top of that - I'm scared that if I fall too much in love with her then I'll want to compromise my career for her - for example, I may be late sometimes - all because of a problem she's caused" said Sara.
"Sara, I'd understand. Catherine has a daughter and I understand that - and anyway Sara - you already have relationships in your life which can cause you problems - you didn't choose your mum's bad health but it affects your work attendance - but I understand - because it's natural - and because it can happen to anyone of us!" Grissom said.
"I can't tell you what to do Sara - and I don't know if you'll fall in love with her or not - I can only give you advice as a friend - and my advice is - jump in the deep end and give it a go" Grissom concluded.
He finished by looking her straight in the eyes, concerned.
"It's more complicated than you or Catherine understand - but I have no choice - I've got to take her in!" said Sara.
There was silence for a few seconds as she gathered her thoughts.
"Now, do you want me to drive you home?" Grissom asked.
Sara nodded. She wasn't in a state to drive any further.