Sara, her parents, Daven and Uncle Lenny argued all night. Alaney, Michelle
and Michelle's sisters had been told to go do something till morning.
Alaney didn't know what was going on at Sara's. All she knew was she
trusted Sara to sort it. That didn't stop her worrying about Sara's health
though.
Alaney returned around ten the next morning to find no one around except Daven and Sara. They were curled up together on the sofa. Daven was comforting a crying Sara.
"You o.k.?. Have they gone?" Laney asked.
Sara nodded tearfully.
"I think Lenny and the girls are on a plane back home by now. But me and Sara's parents are staying for another day - just in case" Daven replied.
"Just in case what?" Laney asked.
"Thanks Daven. Can you go back to see my parents now?. Please!. I need to be alone with Laney!" Sara said.
Daven got up quietly, got his coat, kissed Sara and Laney on the cheeks and then left.
"What's going on?" Laney asked.
"Come and sit down. We need to talk" Sara said disturbed.
Laney sat next to her anxiously.
"What's going on?. Is someone hurt?. Has someone died?" Laney asked.
After all, Sara was acting like someone had died.
"No. No one is seriously hurt and no one will be anymore. Because it's all going to stop" Sara replied still trance like.
"That's wonderful!. So what's wrong?" Laney asked
Sara looked Laney in the eyes and began to cry.
"I'm so sorry Laney!. I know I promised you! - But! - But! - but I've got to sent away" Sara admitted.
Laney was dumbfounded. You could see the colour drain from her face.
"What?!?. Why?!?", Laney asked. "You promised!" Laney shouted.
"Please don't hate me!. I have no choice!" Sara cried.
Sara tearfully tried to hold Laney but Laney pushed her away.
"You promised!", Laney shouted again, "You said you loved me!. That you'd look after me!".
"I do love you!. That's why I'm doing this!" Sara claimed frantically.
Sara stopped and took a deep breath.
"Your going to live with Uncle Lenny. He's going to move away from camp cuckoo so he can protect you!" Sara insisted tearfully.
"No!. Don't make out your doing this for me! - Your doing this to save your own skin! - Or maybe your bored of me?. So you think you can just up and drop me!. What did they say or do to make you change your mind?. If their making threats, Daven and Lenny won't let it happen!" Laney insisted.
"They can't be with us 24/7, Laney! - even if they wanted to!" Sara shouted.
Laney went quiet.
"Fine. But don't pin this on me - admit it!. You'd rather save your own skin than mine!" Laney insisted.
"I'd die for you, Laney!" Sara shouted.
Then Sara went quiet.
"But I'm not the one he's threatening to kill. Your much more useful dead than I am" Sara admitted.
Laney was shocked.
"Whoa!. Wait a moment!. Don't you think your getting a little bit heavy here!. Why are we talking about killing?. Don't be silly - your over reacting!. Your dad wouldn't kill anyone unless it was an accident!. And anyway, your parents don't care as much as that about you ruining your career!!!. Sara just tell them you prefer me and they'll understand!!!. Tell them your life will be over if you give me away not the other way round. This is getting ridiculous!! - why do your parents care so much?!?" Laney replied.
Sara was silent for a long time then finally began to speak,
"My parents care because - Well!. Before you were born, there was a major crime that took place - My father was heavily involved in it!. And someone died!. And your mother found out. She didn't want you - you were just the result of some one night stand she'd had and she didn't want kids at that time in her life - and still doesn't. But she wanted you to be looked after. She didn't want to have you put in care because of all those abuse cases you hear. So she blackmailed my dad. She left you on the doorstep saying that if he didn't make sure you were looked after properly then she would tell the police what happened and he'd be put away for life! - because HE killed someone!. Your mother knew Boby had a lovely wife, who was a brilliant mother to their daughter - me!. And your mother also knew that if Boby didn't want to risk keeping you himself then he and mom had so many friends and relatives who seemed like such good and loving people that he would give you to them and they'd look after you well. So, she gave you to him to make sure you were looked after well and made him promise not to put you in care ever. We've always stayed in contact with her and she has always - right up to this day - maintained the wish for you never to see her or know who she is or know who your father is" Sara explained.
"Still?" Laney asked.
"She build a new life - and there's no room for you in it!" Sara said.
"What?. Like a new family?" Laney asked.
"I can't tell you. I've said too much about her!. Anyway!. My parents don't want you to be associated with them or me because their petrified that you or someone else will go sniffing around looking for your parentage and they'll stumble across dad's past - and he'll be put away for life!. And when your facing a life sentence - then it's worth risking another one!. Because a life sentence and a life sentence still equals life!" Sara said.
Laney was stunned. She looked really pale and looked like she was about to be sick.
"Did your dad accidentally kill this person?" Laney asked upset.
"No, not really. He knew what he was doing" Sara said tearfully.
"How can this crime and this murder have all been covered up?" Laney asked.
"There were no witnesses except for those who were involved or told. And all those who threaten to tell are threatened with death" Sara said.
"Why didn't or haven't forensics picked it up?" Laney asked.
"The police don't know the crime or the murder took place. It's all been covered up and the evidence hidden away" Sara said.
Laney looked at Sara shocked.
"But if he kills me in Nevada then he might get the electric chair! - it's not worth killing me then!" Laney said.
"He says if he gets a life sentence he may as well be dead so he'd rather risk it. He said he might commit suicide anyway" Sara said.
Laney looked astounded.
"I just want to protect you, Laney. If you don't live with me and if you don't go digging round into your parentage - then my dad says he won't kill you" Sara said.
"Isn't there any way I can find out who my parents are without finding out about his crimes?. Or even if I promise not to tell anyone what he did!" Laney asked.
"No Laney!. It isn't that simple!. It's impossible!. For a start, he can't risk you knowing and telling - even if you say you won't now - well, you might change your mind!. Secondly, Laney the deal with your mother was that if you didn't know who your parents were then your mother would make sure no one knew the crimes dad had done"
"So your saying if I find out who my mother is, then she will tell everyone what he did because I found out?" Laney reiterated.
Laney put her hands on her cheeks and sighed in shock.
"I never thought your dad was capable of murder!" Laney said.
Laney turned and looked at Sara.
"And how do you feel about all this? - what your dad is?!?" Laney asked.
"I love you both. I hate my father but part of me also loves him no matter how evil he's been - and I don't want him to go to jail, Laney!. More than anything though - I love you!. You've become like a substitute daughter/sister to me all rolled into one and It really kills me to lose you. But even if I got him put in jail - I just can't be sure it wouldn't be able to get you!. Look at me Laney! - do you think this is easy?. I don't want him to kill you - So this is the only way!. I love you though - I love you so much!. You've always been like an estranged sister to me - because you were given to MY family!. And now you've become like a daughter and a sister to me! - all rolled into one!. And I love you so much and that's why I'm doing this!" Sara replied tearfully.
They had a massive tear-filled hug.
"Well, it explains a lot. It explains why you always seemed to avoid me as a child. And why you didn't want me to live with you. It explains why your parents are kicking up such a fuss - and why you and your family have always avoided me but seemed to have a secret soft spot for me too!" Laney said.
"I didn't mean to seem a heartless cow, Laney!. I was just scared what would happen if I spend too much time with you!" Sara explained.
"I understand" Laney cried.
"Laney. Please don't tell my parents I've told you later!. I've said too much!" Sara explained.
Laney nodded.
Finally Laney took a deep breath to take it all in.
"I better go pack then!. Your right it's the only way!" Laney said tearfully.
"I love you!" Sara reiterated.
"I know. I love you too" Laney reassured her.
Sara took a deep breath and said,
"Daven and you are getting a bus to the airport tomorrow morning. I'm sorry but I just can't bare to drive you! - and I'll be in too much of a state anyway!. You'll get the plane back to California. My parents will be on a plane the next day. I'm sorry but you and Lenny's family will have to live in camp cuckoo for just a few weeks more because Lenny has to find a new house. Lenny was thinking of San Francisco. How does that sound?. It's far away enough from both me and my parents. No you can't live here until they get a house - before you ask!. Your not allowed to live nearby me before you ask!. You can visit me but I wouldn't mention it to my parents - I don't think they'd like it!. And I wouldn't visit too often!. This isn't the way I want it though!".
"I know" Laney said.
Laney got up and went to her room and packed her stuff. This left Sara stressed and worried on the sofa. She began crying uncontrollably again.
The next morning, Libby and Daven sat on the sofa as Sara and Laney said their tearful goodbyes.
"It's for the best, Laney. We both know that. You deserve more than some woman who has no time for you because of her career. You deserve more than some woman who's only old enough to be your sister. You deserve more than some woman who has no child raising experience and has no siblings to offer you!. Uncle Lenny is the best you can get!. He has siblings to offer you and experience with raising kids!. And he's your uncle - biology or not! - so he loves you - and now - now your be like a daughter to him. You can go home to him during college holidays and he'll accept you like a daughter. I don't need to tell you this! - you know how he took our cousin Chrissie in and treats her like his own!. I admit he can't offer you a mother figure since Aunt Jenny died but - but he's the best option!" Sara declared.
"I know" Laney said
Sara burst out crying.
"You know I love you more than anything!. I love you like you were my own!" Sara said.
They hugged. Both of them were in floods of tears.
"I love you too!" Laney said nodding.
Eventually they had to finish their hug so Laney could go. Laney picked up her bags to leave. Daven got up and started to help her with her bags. Daven and Laney were about to go when Laney stopped and turned to Sara.
"Wait!. Daven can you take my bags downstairs and give me a minute with Sara" Laney said.
"Of course" Daven said and left.
"Sara. There's something I need to tell you!. I'm not trying to change your mind - and I know you have no choice. I just really need to tell you something!" Laney declared.
Laney took a deep breath.
"Look!. I know Uncle Lenny loves me!. I know I can't live with you!. I know living with Uncle Lenny is for the best. And I've always dreamed of having brothers or sisters - especially ones near my age!. And Michelle is one of my best friends in the world! - who else could I prefer to live with than my best friend?!?. Well to be frank YOU, Sara!. I'd prefer to live with you than my best friend!?!" Laney explained.
"Why?!?!" Sara declared.
"I was just about to explain if you let me carry on!. Sara!. No one! - absolutely no one! - has loved me like you have!. Let me explain!. Umm. It's the way you look at me, Sara!. No one has looked so in love with me that way before!" Laney explained.
Laney began crying again and then continued,
"Miranda loved me. But she never loved like I was her child. She loved me like a niece or something. And uncle Lenny will look at me and love me the same way as Miranda. He has his own children. I'm 18! - I haven't grown up with him like Chrissie!. And Chrissie has always been the odd one out really!. I'll never be like one of his own!. But, you Sara! - you have no other children! - so I get the impression that might be why you look at me with such love. I love that you love me!. And I don't think anyone will love me like you have!. Even as a child I noticed it. You spent a lot of time avoiding me! - but on the rare occasions you looked me in the eye - you had this look of complete love and adoration for me!. And just when I thought you couldn't love me anymore I come here and you do!. I don't think anyone can love me as much as you do!" Laney explained.
Laney took a deep breath.
"I've given up on my parents. They don't love me - and you've made that clear enough. So they don't love me more than you!. You're the closest I've ever got to a mother!. And I don't know why I'm telling you this!. I know I can't live with you and I'm not trying to change your mind. But I just really think you need to know this!. And I think you need to know that I believe you can be a really good mother - so go have yourself a child!. I know your scared because you don't think you'll be a good one and love them enough! - but I'm telling you your going to be a fantastic mother!. 'All you need is love' hey?. You'll be able to look after that child because you'll love them so much! - plus your clever so you won't have a problem learning the practicals! - plus I know your love your child more than your job because you love me more! - so you won't mind giving up your job for a year or two. You've even got loads of money!. So don't be scared anymore! - I just wanted you to know your be a great mother!" Laney said.
Sara was stunned and speechless that Laney had realised all this. After a while Sara tearfully said,
"It doesn't matter if I have other children. I want you too!".
Sara took a deep breath and sat on the sofa. And suddenly she burst into uncontrollable floods of tears. Libby came over and comforted her but Sara flinched her off. Sara's tear fit lasted a long while. After some time Laney interrupted,
"Ummm. Sara! - I've got to go!".
Sara calmed herself down, wiped away her tears and got up. She opened her arms and her and Laney hugged her.
"Oh darling!. Goodbye!. I love you!" Sara said.
Laney smiled and left.
Then Sara sat back down on the sofa. This time she didn't have a crying fit. She just curled up in a ball with a box of tissues and sat in a trance like state of devastation. She was heartbroken and that was how she was behaving. Libby didn't know what to do to make her feel better. So Libby just sat there feeling awkward and useless because she couldn't do anything to make her daughter feel better. After five minutes of both the women thinking to themselves Libby tried to say something - just anything!.
"I'm sorry" Libby said meekly.
"Just don't, mom!" Sara said fobbing Libby off.
Sara got up and put a cd in her cd player and then went back to her curled up distraught position on the sofa. The song begun playing - it was U2's 'With or Without you'. Libby recognised it straight away.
"Gees Sara!. Do you need to be so dramatic!" Libby exclaimed.
Then Sara begun to whisper along in her hypnotic distraught state,
"See the stone set in your eyes. See the thorn twist in your side. I wait for you!. Sleight of hand - and twist of 'fate'!. On a bed of nails she makes me wait. And I wait without you!", she whispered along distraught and dramatic, "With or without you. With or without you. Through the storm we reach the shore. You give it all BUT I WANT MORE!!!!!. And I'm waiting for you!. With or without you. With or without you. I can't live with or without you!!!!".
Sara began to sing a bit louder than a whisper,
"My hands are tied!. My body bruised!. She's got me with nothing to win and nothing left to lose. And you give yourself away!!!!. And you give yourself away!!!. And you give!- And you give!- And you give yourself away!!!. With or without you!!!. With or without you!. I CAN'T LIVE WITH OR WITHOUT YOU!!!!!".
Finally Libby turned the cd off in frustration.
"I can't do this, mom!!!", Sara shouted tearfully, "Mom, tell me I have no choice!!!. Tell me it won't work!!!. Stop me, Mom!!!! - I want to go get her back!!! - Stop me!!! - Tell me I can't!!!. Go on!!! - I'm giving you a open invitation!. Convince me!. Because I want her! - I want to go get her, Mom!. Tell me I can't!!. COME ON TELL ME!!!" Sara shouted tearfully.
Libby took a deep breath.
"You can" Libby confessed meekly to Sara.
Sara was shocked.
"What?. No mom, your right I can't!. It's impossible!" Sara confessed.
"Not impossible!" Libby confessed meekly
"What?", Sara asked, "How?".
"Blackmail" Libby suggested.
"No, it's too dangerous!. Someone will end up dead or hurt!" Sara stated.
"No!. It's all threats, Sara!. He doesn't want to kill anyone!. If you make sure she never finds out who both her parents are - then everything should be fine and your dad will be happy. She's given up on her parents right?. She'd need never know. This is actually best! - the situation satisfies both your needs without her knowing! - perfect!. I'll just explain, it's perfect, to your dad!. Otherwise!. We go to the police!. Sort this all out once and for all!" Libby suggested.
"No! I don't want her to know!. I don't want anyone to know!" Sara shouted.
Then Sara calmed down,
"Would you really do that?" Sara asked.
"Of course I would!. I love you more than anything!. But I'm only going to do what you want me to do!. I'm not doing anything unless you want me to. And when you decide you want to do something I'll be right there next to you - I promise!. I'm not taking sides, Sara. I'm just trying to keep your dad sweet. And I know you don't want to lose him. And I know even if you did - you don't want everyone to know the truth. But when you do - I'll be right there by your side on your side!" Libby said.
Sara was silent and shocked.
"Really?" Sara asked.
"I thought you knew!" Libby declared.
"No", Sara said, "All I knew was you loved me. But didn't think you loved me more than yourself!".
"Of course I do!" Libby insisted.
"Laney's right you know. You do love her! - you love her so much!. I'd never noticed before - I was too busy panicking to notice! - but I see it now! - the way you look at her - you really love her!. I love you as much as you love, Laney!. I'd die for you! - and you'd die for Laney because! - because! - because though me and your father hate to admit it - she's become your daughter!" Libby admitted.
Sara nodded tearfully.
"And it's because I know how much you love her - that I'm going to let you - I mean make sure you get to keep her!" Libby said.
Sara shook her head.
"Dad won't agree!. It's too much of a risk!. I'll not put anyone in danger!" Sara decided.
"Sara, it will be fine I'll sort him!" Libby insisted.
"Like you've sorted him in the past?!" Sara said.
"Sara!. It's not as bad as it seems. He won't kill anyone intentionally - he'd rather go to prison!. We blackmail him and we promise him she won't find out - and we explain how much you love her - and maybe we'll throw in a little bit of emotional blackmail if needs be!" Libby suggested confidentially.
Sara looked unsure. So Libby came over and held Sara's face in her hands (so Sara looked her straight in the face) then she said,
"Sara!. No mother should have their daughter taken away from them!. I would die if someone had taken you away from me!. Even now! - though you've moved out! - at least I had 18 years with you! - and at least I see get to see you!. But I know if I keep acting like this - you may just give up on me!. I would die if I lost you! - and I should know because I've been threatened with losing you so many times!. No mother should be without the daughter they love!. And you've turned into Laney's mother! - You love her more than anything in the world! - You love her as much as I love you!. I can't take your daughter away from you!. She puts the colour in your cheeks!. She makes you happy!. And you haven't been happy in a long long while baby!. And if Alaney is the answer then so be it!. I'll explain all this to your father when I'm emotionally blackmailing him!" Libby declared.
"Now get in that car of yours and drive us down to that airport before she gets on that plane and you lose her!" Libby insisted.
Sara was ecstatic. So relieved!. So delighted!. She gave her mother a massive hug and they left for the airport!.
At the airport, Daven was in the queue waiting to check their luggage in. Laney was sitting nearby feeling down, depressed and quietly sobbing. Even though Laney knew it was impossible, Laney still checked round in case Sara had come to get her. Laney hadn't been looking round when she heard Sara shouting. When she heard it the first time she didn't believe it - she thought it was just her imagination. She figured she was hearing things and didn't even look up. But then she heard it again.
"Laney! Laney!" Sara shouted, as Libby followed closely behind.
"Sara! What are you doing here?" Laney asked delighted but confused.
"I'm not going to give you up!. I'm taking you back home! - to my home!" Sara said.
"No, you can't!. Sara, I know it's hard but you've got to turn around and go home!. It can't be!" Laney decided.
"No you don't understand!. We've sorted it!. Well, we will do!. We have a plan to sort it. And as long as you don't ask questions and don't snoop about - this will all be fine!. You can come live with me forever!" Sara insisted.
"Really?!?" Laney exclaimed excited.
"Really!" Sara exclaimed excited back.
Laney and Sara had a gigantic ecstatic hug. And Libby smiled. She smiled delighted but worried.
Sara and Laney couldn't keep their hands each other, in a philia love way, for the next few days. That afternoon Sara's parents and Daven got a plane home. That night Laney and Sara stayed in to spend some quality time together. Laney fell asleep in Sara's arms and Sara decided to put on Michelle's album. She looked at the cover and found a song entitled 'Its You' and put that track on because she remembered it being about love. It was about eros love but she still felt it would apply to her philia love for Laney. So Sara put the track on and went back over and put Laney back leaning on her as Laney slept. When that track finished she looked at the cover again and found a song called 'Drop in the ocean'. Sara remembered writing this with Michelle. They wrote a lot of songs together. Sara had written it about the same person as 'Everywhere' was about. Sara decided it was quite fitting to now dedicate it to Laney. So Sara put that track on and then went back to holding Laney. As Sara sat there she couldn't help remembering Laney growing up as a child and how much she loved her.
Alaney returned around ten the next morning to find no one around except Daven and Sara. They were curled up together on the sofa. Daven was comforting a crying Sara.
"You o.k.?. Have they gone?" Laney asked.
Sara nodded tearfully.
"I think Lenny and the girls are on a plane back home by now. But me and Sara's parents are staying for another day - just in case" Daven replied.
"Just in case what?" Laney asked.
"Thanks Daven. Can you go back to see my parents now?. Please!. I need to be alone with Laney!" Sara said.
Daven got up quietly, got his coat, kissed Sara and Laney on the cheeks and then left.
"What's going on?" Laney asked.
"Come and sit down. We need to talk" Sara said disturbed.
Laney sat next to her anxiously.
"What's going on?. Is someone hurt?. Has someone died?" Laney asked.
After all, Sara was acting like someone had died.
"No. No one is seriously hurt and no one will be anymore. Because it's all going to stop" Sara replied still trance like.
"That's wonderful!. So what's wrong?" Laney asked
Sara looked Laney in the eyes and began to cry.
"I'm so sorry Laney!. I know I promised you! - But! - But! - but I've got to sent away" Sara admitted.
Laney was dumbfounded. You could see the colour drain from her face.
"What?!?. Why?!?", Laney asked. "You promised!" Laney shouted.
"Please don't hate me!. I have no choice!" Sara cried.
Sara tearfully tried to hold Laney but Laney pushed her away.
"You promised!", Laney shouted again, "You said you loved me!. That you'd look after me!".
"I do love you!. That's why I'm doing this!" Sara claimed frantically.
Sara stopped and took a deep breath.
"Your going to live with Uncle Lenny. He's going to move away from camp cuckoo so he can protect you!" Sara insisted tearfully.
"No!. Don't make out your doing this for me! - Your doing this to save your own skin! - Or maybe your bored of me?. So you think you can just up and drop me!. What did they say or do to make you change your mind?. If their making threats, Daven and Lenny won't let it happen!" Laney insisted.
"They can't be with us 24/7, Laney! - even if they wanted to!" Sara shouted.
Laney went quiet.
"Fine. But don't pin this on me - admit it!. You'd rather save your own skin than mine!" Laney insisted.
"I'd die for you, Laney!" Sara shouted.
Then Sara went quiet.
"But I'm not the one he's threatening to kill. Your much more useful dead than I am" Sara admitted.
Laney was shocked.
"Whoa!. Wait a moment!. Don't you think your getting a little bit heavy here!. Why are we talking about killing?. Don't be silly - your over reacting!. Your dad wouldn't kill anyone unless it was an accident!. And anyway, your parents don't care as much as that about you ruining your career!!!. Sara just tell them you prefer me and they'll understand!!!. Tell them your life will be over if you give me away not the other way round. This is getting ridiculous!! - why do your parents care so much?!?" Laney replied.
Sara was silent for a long time then finally began to speak,
"My parents care because - Well!. Before you were born, there was a major crime that took place - My father was heavily involved in it!. And someone died!. And your mother found out. She didn't want you - you were just the result of some one night stand she'd had and she didn't want kids at that time in her life - and still doesn't. But she wanted you to be looked after. She didn't want to have you put in care because of all those abuse cases you hear. So she blackmailed my dad. She left you on the doorstep saying that if he didn't make sure you were looked after properly then she would tell the police what happened and he'd be put away for life! - because HE killed someone!. Your mother knew Boby had a lovely wife, who was a brilliant mother to their daughter - me!. And your mother also knew that if Boby didn't want to risk keeping you himself then he and mom had so many friends and relatives who seemed like such good and loving people that he would give you to them and they'd look after you well. So, she gave you to him to make sure you were looked after well and made him promise not to put you in care ever. We've always stayed in contact with her and she has always - right up to this day - maintained the wish for you never to see her or know who she is or know who your father is" Sara explained.
"Still?" Laney asked.
"She build a new life - and there's no room for you in it!" Sara said.
"What?. Like a new family?" Laney asked.
"I can't tell you. I've said too much about her!. Anyway!. My parents don't want you to be associated with them or me because their petrified that you or someone else will go sniffing around looking for your parentage and they'll stumble across dad's past - and he'll be put away for life!. And when your facing a life sentence - then it's worth risking another one!. Because a life sentence and a life sentence still equals life!" Sara said.
Laney was stunned. She looked really pale and looked like she was about to be sick.
"Did your dad accidentally kill this person?" Laney asked upset.
"No, not really. He knew what he was doing" Sara said tearfully.
"How can this crime and this murder have all been covered up?" Laney asked.
"There were no witnesses except for those who were involved or told. And all those who threaten to tell are threatened with death" Sara said.
"Why didn't or haven't forensics picked it up?" Laney asked.
"The police don't know the crime or the murder took place. It's all been covered up and the evidence hidden away" Sara said.
Laney looked at Sara shocked.
"But if he kills me in Nevada then he might get the electric chair! - it's not worth killing me then!" Laney said.
"He says if he gets a life sentence he may as well be dead so he'd rather risk it. He said he might commit suicide anyway" Sara said.
Laney looked astounded.
"I just want to protect you, Laney. If you don't live with me and if you don't go digging round into your parentage - then my dad says he won't kill you" Sara said.
"Isn't there any way I can find out who my parents are without finding out about his crimes?. Or even if I promise not to tell anyone what he did!" Laney asked.
"No Laney!. It isn't that simple!. It's impossible!. For a start, he can't risk you knowing and telling - even if you say you won't now - well, you might change your mind!. Secondly, Laney the deal with your mother was that if you didn't know who your parents were then your mother would make sure no one knew the crimes dad had done"
"So your saying if I find out who my mother is, then she will tell everyone what he did because I found out?" Laney reiterated.
Laney put her hands on her cheeks and sighed in shock.
"I never thought your dad was capable of murder!" Laney said.
Laney turned and looked at Sara.
"And how do you feel about all this? - what your dad is?!?" Laney asked.
"I love you both. I hate my father but part of me also loves him no matter how evil he's been - and I don't want him to go to jail, Laney!. More than anything though - I love you!. You've become like a substitute daughter/sister to me all rolled into one and It really kills me to lose you. But even if I got him put in jail - I just can't be sure it wouldn't be able to get you!. Look at me Laney! - do you think this is easy?. I don't want him to kill you - So this is the only way!. I love you though - I love you so much!. You've always been like an estranged sister to me - because you were given to MY family!. And now you've become like a daughter and a sister to me! - all rolled into one!. And I love you so much and that's why I'm doing this!" Sara replied tearfully.
They had a massive tear-filled hug.
"Well, it explains a lot. It explains why you always seemed to avoid me as a child. And why you didn't want me to live with you. It explains why your parents are kicking up such a fuss - and why you and your family have always avoided me but seemed to have a secret soft spot for me too!" Laney said.
"I didn't mean to seem a heartless cow, Laney!. I was just scared what would happen if I spend too much time with you!" Sara explained.
"I understand" Laney cried.
"Laney. Please don't tell my parents I've told you later!. I've said too much!" Sara explained.
Laney nodded.
Finally Laney took a deep breath to take it all in.
"I better go pack then!. Your right it's the only way!" Laney said tearfully.
"I love you!" Sara reiterated.
"I know. I love you too" Laney reassured her.
Sara took a deep breath and said,
"Daven and you are getting a bus to the airport tomorrow morning. I'm sorry but I just can't bare to drive you! - and I'll be in too much of a state anyway!. You'll get the plane back to California. My parents will be on a plane the next day. I'm sorry but you and Lenny's family will have to live in camp cuckoo for just a few weeks more because Lenny has to find a new house. Lenny was thinking of San Francisco. How does that sound?. It's far away enough from both me and my parents. No you can't live here until they get a house - before you ask!. Your not allowed to live nearby me before you ask!. You can visit me but I wouldn't mention it to my parents - I don't think they'd like it!. And I wouldn't visit too often!. This isn't the way I want it though!".
"I know" Laney said.
Laney got up and went to her room and packed her stuff. This left Sara stressed and worried on the sofa. She began crying uncontrollably again.
The next morning, Libby and Daven sat on the sofa as Sara and Laney said their tearful goodbyes.
"It's for the best, Laney. We both know that. You deserve more than some woman who has no time for you because of her career. You deserve more than some woman who's only old enough to be your sister. You deserve more than some woman who has no child raising experience and has no siblings to offer you!. Uncle Lenny is the best you can get!. He has siblings to offer you and experience with raising kids!. And he's your uncle - biology or not! - so he loves you - and now - now your be like a daughter to him. You can go home to him during college holidays and he'll accept you like a daughter. I don't need to tell you this! - you know how he took our cousin Chrissie in and treats her like his own!. I admit he can't offer you a mother figure since Aunt Jenny died but - but he's the best option!" Sara declared.
"I know" Laney said
Sara burst out crying.
"You know I love you more than anything!. I love you like you were my own!" Sara said.
They hugged. Both of them were in floods of tears.
"I love you too!" Laney said nodding.
Eventually they had to finish their hug so Laney could go. Laney picked up her bags to leave. Daven got up and started to help her with her bags. Daven and Laney were about to go when Laney stopped and turned to Sara.
"Wait!. Daven can you take my bags downstairs and give me a minute with Sara" Laney said.
"Of course" Daven said and left.
"Sara. There's something I need to tell you!. I'm not trying to change your mind - and I know you have no choice. I just really need to tell you something!" Laney declared.
Laney took a deep breath.
"Look!. I know Uncle Lenny loves me!. I know I can't live with you!. I know living with Uncle Lenny is for the best. And I've always dreamed of having brothers or sisters - especially ones near my age!. And Michelle is one of my best friends in the world! - who else could I prefer to live with than my best friend?!?. Well to be frank YOU, Sara!. I'd prefer to live with you than my best friend!?!" Laney explained.
"Why?!?!" Sara declared.
"I was just about to explain if you let me carry on!. Sara!. No one! - absolutely no one! - has loved me like you have!. Let me explain!. Umm. It's the way you look at me, Sara!. No one has looked so in love with me that way before!" Laney explained.
Laney began crying again and then continued,
"Miranda loved me. But she never loved like I was her child. She loved me like a niece or something. And uncle Lenny will look at me and love me the same way as Miranda. He has his own children. I'm 18! - I haven't grown up with him like Chrissie!. And Chrissie has always been the odd one out really!. I'll never be like one of his own!. But, you Sara! - you have no other children! - so I get the impression that might be why you look at me with such love. I love that you love me!. And I don't think anyone will love me like you have!. Even as a child I noticed it. You spent a lot of time avoiding me! - but on the rare occasions you looked me in the eye - you had this look of complete love and adoration for me!. And just when I thought you couldn't love me anymore I come here and you do!. I don't think anyone can love me as much as you do!" Laney explained.
Laney took a deep breath.
"I've given up on my parents. They don't love me - and you've made that clear enough. So they don't love me more than you!. You're the closest I've ever got to a mother!. And I don't know why I'm telling you this!. I know I can't live with you and I'm not trying to change your mind. But I just really think you need to know this!. And I think you need to know that I believe you can be a really good mother - so go have yourself a child!. I know your scared because you don't think you'll be a good one and love them enough! - but I'm telling you your going to be a fantastic mother!. 'All you need is love' hey?. You'll be able to look after that child because you'll love them so much! - plus your clever so you won't have a problem learning the practicals! - plus I know your love your child more than your job because you love me more! - so you won't mind giving up your job for a year or two. You've even got loads of money!. So don't be scared anymore! - I just wanted you to know your be a great mother!" Laney said.
Sara was stunned and speechless that Laney had realised all this. After a while Sara tearfully said,
"It doesn't matter if I have other children. I want you too!".
Sara took a deep breath and sat on the sofa. And suddenly she burst into uncontrollable floods of tears. Libby came over and comforted her but Sara flinched her off. Sara's tear fit lasted a long while. After some time Laney interrupted,
"Ummm. Sara! - I've got to go!".
Sara calmed herself down, wiped away her tears and got up. She opened her arms and her and Laney hugged her.
"Oh darling!. Goodbye!. I love you!" Sara said.
Laney smiled and left.
Then Sara sat back down on the sofa. This time she didn't have a crying fit. She just curled up in a ball with a box of tissues and sat in a trance like state of devastation. She was heartbroken and that was how she was behaving. Libby didn't know what to do to make her feel better. So Libby just sat there feeling awkward and useless because she couldn't do anything to make her daughter feel better. After five minutes of both the women thinking to themselves Libby tried to say something - just anything!.
"I'm sorry" Libby said meekly.
"Just don't, mom!" Sara said fobbing Libby off.
Sara got up and put a cd in her cd player and then went back to her curled up distraught position on the sofa. The song begun playing - it was U2's 'With or Without you'. Libby recognised it straight away.
"Gees Sara!. Do you need to be so dramatic!" Libby exclaimed.
Then Sara begun to whisper along in her hypnotic distraught state,
"See the stone set in your eyes. See the thorn twist in your side. I wait for you!. Sleight of hand - and twist of 'fate'!. On a bed of nails she makes me wait. And I wait without you!", she whispered along distraught and dramatic, "With or without you. With or without you. Through the storm we reach the shore. You give it all BUT I WANT MORE!!!!!. And I'm waiting for you!. With or without you. With or without you. I can't live with or without you!!!!".
Sara began to sing a bit louder than a whisper,
"My hands are tied!. My body bruised!. She's got me with nothing to win and nothing left to lose. And you give yourself away!!!!. And you give yourself away!!!. And you give!- And you give!- And you give yourself away!!!. With or without you!!!. With or without you!. I CAN'T LIVE WITH OR WITHOUT YOU!!!!!".
Finally Libby turned the cd off in frustration.
"I can't do this, mom!!!", Sara shouted tearfully, "Mom, tell me I have no choice!!!. Tell me it won't work!!!. Stop me, Mom!!!! - I want to go get her back!!! - Stop me!!! - Tell me I can't!!!. Go on!!! - I'm giving you a open invitation!. Convince me!. Because I want her! - I want to go get her, Mom!. Tell me I can't!!. COME ON TELL ME!!!" Sara shouted tearfully.
Libby took a deep breath.
"You can" Libby confessed meekly to Sara.
Sara was shocked.
"What?. No mom, your right I can't!. It's impossible!" Sara confessed.
"Not impossible!" Libby confessed meekly
"What?", Sara asked, "How?".
"Blackmail" Libby suggested.
"No, it's too dangerous!. Someone will end up dead or hurt!" Sara stated.
"No!. It's all threats, Sara!. He doesn't want to kill anyone!. If you make sure she never finds out who both her parents are - then everything should be fine and your dad will be happy. She's given up on her parents right?. She'd need never know. This is actually best! - the situation satisfies both your needs without her knowing! - perfect!. I'll just explain, it's perfect, to your dad!. Otherwise!. We go to the police!. Sort this all out once and for all!" Libby suggested.
"No! I don't want her to know!. I don't want anyone to know!" Sara shouted.
Then Sara calmed down,
"Would you really do that?" Sara asked.
"Of course I would!. I love you more than anything!. But I'm only going to do what you want me to do!. I'm not doing anything unless you want me to. And when you decide you want to do something I'll be right there next to you - I promise!. I'm not taking sides, Sara. I'm just trying to keep your dad sweet. And I know you don't want to lose him. And I know even if you did - you don't want everyone to know the truth. But when you do - I'll be right there by your side on your side!" Libby said.
Sara was silent and shocked.
"Really?" Sara asked.
"I thought you knew!" Libby declared.
"No", Sara said, "All I knew was you loved me. But didn't think you loved me more than yourself!".
"Of course I do!" Libby insisted.
"Laney's right you know. You do love her! - you love her so much!. I'd never noticed before - I was too busy panicking to notice! - but I see it now! - the way you look at her - you really love her!. I love you as much as you love, Laney!. I'd die for you! - and you'd die for Laney because! - because! - because though me and your father hate to admit it - she's become your daughter!" Libby admitted.
Sara nodded tearfully.
"And it's because I know how much you love her - that I'm going to let you - I mean make sure you get to keep her!" Libby said.
Sara shook her head.
"Dad won't agree!. It's too much of a risk!. I'll not put anyone in danger!" Sara decided.
"Sara, it will be fine I'll sort him!" Libby insisted.
"Like you've sorted him in the past?!" Sara said.
"Sara!. It's not as bad as it seems. He won't kill anyone intentionally - he'd rather go to prison!. We blackmail him and we promise him she won't find out - and we explain how much you love her - and maybe we'll throw in a little bit of emotional blackmail if needs be!" Libby suggested confidentially.
Sara looked unsure. So Libby came over and held Sara's face in her hands (so Sara looked her straight in the face) then she said,
"Sara!. No mother should have their daughter taken away from them!. I would die if someone had taken you away from me!. Even now! - though you've moved out! - at least I had 18 years with you! - and at least I see get to see you!. But I know if I keep acting like this - you may just give up on me!. I would die if I lost you! - and I should know because I've been threatened with losing you so many times!. No mother should be without the daughter they love!. And you've turned into Laney's mother! - You love her more than anything in the world! - You love her as much as I love you!. I can't take your daughter away from you!. She puts the colour in your cheeks!. She makes you happy!. And you haven't been happy in a long long while baby!. And if Alaney is the answer then so be it!. I'll explain all this to your father when I'm emotionally blackmailing him!" Libby declared.
"Now get in that car of yours and drive us down to that airport before she gets on that plane and you lose her!" Libby insisted.
Sara was ecstatic. So relieved!. So delighted!. She gave her mother a massive hug and they left for the airport!.
At the airport, Daven was in the queue waiting to check their luggage in. Laney was sitting nearby feeling down, depressed and quietly sobbing. Even though Laney knew it was impossible, Laney still checked round in case Sara had come to get her. Laney hadn't been looking round when she heard Sara shouting. When she heard it the first time she didn't believe it - she thought it was just her imagination. She figured she was hearing things and didn't even look up. But then she heard it again.
"Laney! Laney!" Sara shouted, as Libby followed closely behind.
"Sara! What are you doing here?" Laney asked delighted but confused.
"I'm not going to give you up!. I'm taking you back home! - to my home!" Sara said.
"No, you can't!. Sara, I know it's hard but you've got to turn around and go home!. It can't be!" Laney decided.
"No you don't understand!. We've sorted it!. Well, we will do!. We have a plan to sort it. And as long as you don't ask questions and don't snoop about - this will all be fine!. You can come live with me forever!" Sara insisted.
"Really?!?" Laney exclaimed excited.
"Really!" Sara exclaimed excited back.
Laney and Sara had a gigantic ecstatic hug. And Libby smiled. She smiled delighted but worried.
Sara and Laney couldn't keep their hands each other, in a philia love way, for the next few days. That afternoon Sara's parents and Daven got a plane home. That night Laney and Sara stayed in to spend some quality time together. Laney fell asleep in Sara's arms and Sara decided to put on Michelle's album. She looked at the cover and found a song entitled 'Its You' and put that track on because she remembered it being about love. It was about eros love but she still felt it would apply to her philia love for Laney. So Sara put the track on and went back over and put Laney back leaning on her as Laney slept. When that track finished she looked at the cover again and found a song called 'Drop in the ocean'. Sara remembered writing this with Michelle. They wrote a lot of songs together. Sara had written it about the same person as 'Everywhere' was about. Sara decided it was quite fitting to now dedicate it to Laney. So Sara put that track on and then went back to holding Laney. As Sara sat there she couldn't help remembering Laney growing up as a child and how much she loved her.