AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story is picking up where Kimberly Appelcline's "The
First Kiss" fanfic leaves off (you can find the fic on this very site),
somewhere halfway through the epilogue.
**!!WARNING!!** PLEASE READ:
This chapter is strictly R-RATED, but I felt I ought to include it so as to make clearer certain events and motivations for them taking place in future chapters (and some having already occurred). But it is 100% optional to the reader.
For those of you who would indeed rather skip this chapter, then I can give you the brief rundown: basically, this whole chapter deals with how Wendy and Hook have both had sexual dreams about each other – she in reaction to not being able to have "relations" with Peter after Anthony's disappearance; and he because, well, he has an unhealthy fixation on Wendy!
So, if you are sensitive to this sort of material, or you are disturbed at the thought of Captain Hook getting some action (keeping in mind that the version of Hook represented here is the one as portrayed by Jason Isaacs in the P.J. Hogan movie and not some campy Dustin Hoffman-Disney-Cyril Richard version), then don't bother reading any further.
For the rest of you, read on if you dare! (muhahaha!) Chapter XV......More comments please! (
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------
XV. IMPURE THOUGHTS
If you may have noticed a fleeting yet seemingly out-of-place tense interlude between Wendy and Captain Hook as they met face-to-face again for the first time on Blind Man's Bluff, I can assure you that this was not a frivolous occurrence, and I will take this time now to explain it fully.
You see, within Captain Hook's darkened consciousness, there lay but few sentiments other than those that make up his very favorite deadly poison – the very emotions that turn his eyes from forget-me-not blue to blood-red – and those are malice, jealousy, and disappointment. However, what you may be surprised to learn (and indeed not another soul but Hook himself is privy to this) is that deeper within the recesses of Hook's depraved mind and in the foggiest, long-forgotten corners of his black heart are but the tiniest hints of redemption – or rather, the yearning for redemption.
And it was just this hidden desire for something to break him free from the shackles of his own misery that was awakened within the pirate when first he ever laid eyes upon The Wendy so very long ago, gracefully dancing with Peter Pan among the fairies high above the treetops of Neverland.
Up until that moment, Captain Hook and Peter Pan had but one very important thing in common, which was a constant source of comfort for the begrudging pirate: they were both loners, each forever bound to their respective places in this world, and as such were both quite isolated...and thus unloved by anybody. Oh, they both had their adoring and loyal crews, but this was not quite the same as the particular devotion that was missing from their perpetual lives. Only Hook was aware of this deficit – Peter had no understanding or appreciation whatsoever of its existence. And it was this ignorance for such a marvelous and elusive gift among mankind that embittered Hook so deeply when he discovered that Peter had found it first. Why should The Boy get to find love when he did not even know what it was or what to even do with it? And such a lovely one at that. It was so cruelly unfair. And Hook was determined to deprive his nemesis of such a luxury.
And thus did Hook bring the Wendy aboard his ship and attempt to entice her away from the emotionally deficient Peter Pan and to join him instead. To his pleasant surprise, he found her quite charming, and he would daresay the feeling was mutual. She was wise beyond her years – far too wise and mature for one so inadequate as Peter Pan – and as such possessed a great reverence for Hook's ability to *feel* - even if a great majority of those feelings were marred in loathing. Even she, at such a tender age, could see as well as he that, sometimes, 'tis better to feel bitterness than nothing at all. And upon first seeing the girl bestow her precious smile upon him when asked if she would like to be a pirate, Hook soon realized that the benefits of disposing of Peter Pan once and for all could be far vaster than he anticipated. He would be rid of his mortal enemy *and* he would get to keep the lovely Wendy all for himself...a most marvelous plunder yet known.
No, Hook did not expect Wendy to come to him willingly. Despite all her wisdom, she was still but a child, and her spirit was already strongly bound to Peter Pan. And indeed, once he had her back aboard his ship – along with those grubby Lost Boys – she did not take too kindly to the notion that Hook had in all likelihood killed Peter, and she nobly proclaimed she would rather die than join him and his crew. He had no real intention of disposing of her, however. 'Twas not until he had realized Peter was still alive that Wendy was his last option left for getting to him. By this time, as was wont to happen, Hook's maliciousness and hatred far outweighed any other softer emotions that may have been threatening to contaminate his cold heart, and so he felt very little in the way of sympathy as he watched Wendy walk the plank in a last desperate effort to root out and defeat Peter. If he could succeed, he needn't be too unhappy – Peter's death would most certainly make up for losing Wendy.
But alas, neither happened. Peter rescued Wendy from the crocodile just in the nick of time. And Hook's attempt to undermine Peter's Happy Thoughts by taunting him with visions of Wendy's abandoning him backfired most dreadfully. Hook was but mere inches from finally doing in his great enemy when the fair Wendy tricked him quite cunningly – telling Hook she wished to give Peter a "thimble" and then proceeded to bestow upon the Boy the sweetest of kisses Heaven had hence created.
Hook stood and watched in sheer awe as this simple Kiss completely restored Peter and then some, leading to Hook's eventual – though temporary – defeat. It was at that very moment, when Hook witnessed Wendy definitively prove her devotion to Peter, that the captain first became aware that such a miracle as this could exist. It was the greatest treasure he had yet come across, he was sure of it. And like all great things in this world, Hook had to have it.
In the years following this event, Hook would occasionally find his mind wander to Wendy's Kiss and how it may redeem him should she be so kind as to give it to him. Not surprisingly, the Kiss was having some rather adverse side effects upon Peter – it was causing him to *think*. And to *feel*. And Peter discovered quickly to what anguish this could lead. Welcome to my callous world, Hook would think to himself with a sardonic grin as he watched Peter grow older and older.
And then, she came back.
The very second Hook laid eyes upon the breathtaking young woman proudly sauntering back into his cabin to fight for Peter, his great thirst for the sort of pleasure and redemption that only she could seemingly provide was piqued anew, and with greater intensity. And with this also came a new desire to acquire all that came with the Kiss – everything else that was attached to it. The Kiss only was no longer enough. *All* of Wendy must he have.
Hook tried several times to claim her Kiss as his, but she would let none but Peter take it from her. A great blow to his ego it was, but Hook believed that, once Peter was gone for good and Neverland was under the iron grasp of his hook, he could be satisfied enough with this. He was sadly mistaken.
That is when the dreams came.
Hook had very little to do to pass time in Neverland once the island was firmly in his control. No one dared challenge him, so he had no enemies to fight. Only his dark hobby for poisons and potions kept him occupied. And his dreams.
The inception of the dreams were varied, but the outcome always the same. Sometimes, they began aboard his ship where he lay sleeping, and sometimes they started among the grayness of the sullen Neverland clouds. Still other dreams commenced within the jungle or even under the ocean's surface. But always inside these spaces was Wendy. How she would look upon the decadent pirate's face with such warm eyes as she beckoned him forth toward her. Such a regard as this was enough to force the Devil himself into wistful submission, and so Hook could hardly resist.
Once upon her, she would take his hands in hers – yes, both hands, for in Hook's dreams, Peter had never claimed his right one – and she would lower him to the ground, or ocean floor, or cloud, depending on where this particular dream took place. And here would she dispose of any meddlesome clothing and then lay before him, arms outstretched, urging him to her. And with both his hands he would explore every inch of The Wendy, to her great and encouraging gratification. The feel of her skin under his corrupted fingertips made Hook's lust grow ever the more urgent until, finally, he had to lower himself fully upon her. Into his blue eyes she would cast such a look of burning want as to lay waste to any more moment's hesitation for his simmering passion to erupt.
Here, he would try to kiss her, but she would turn her chin upwards, and he would gladly press his lips to her throat instead, delighting in her soft coos of approval. And then, in a sudden burst of pure eagerness, she would fling her arms about his neck and wrap her legs around his waist. He would press himself harder upon her, almost crushing her, but object she did not at all. Their breathing would become increasingly frenzied until in perfect unison, her abdomen rising and lowered with his.
The impassioned pirate grappled at the ground beneath Wendy's hair to brace himself. And with one mighty drive forward, he took her. And when he did, how she would throw her head back and cry out his name to the stars.
"James!"
Their lust and the subsequent grunts it incited now firmly intermingled, Hook held tighter to Wendy, and she would violently dig her nails into his back, the pain from which only excited him further. At this point in time, he did not think about the Kiss. There would be time for that later on. Right now, he focused on the marvelous sensations aroused from his becoming one with the fair and elusive Wendy. All the precious gems and trinkets he had ever plundered could never amount to this treasure lying beneath him. And he would grow ever the more satisfied when Wendy would squeal of how she had never before experienced such pleasure – not even with Peter Pan.
This was all Hook needed to adequately bring the exhilarating sacrament to its delicious and spectacular conclusion. Quite happily did they both arrive at the apex together, their bodies tensing harshly before gradually releasing, settling beneath their cries of ecstasy lingering intertwined above their heads, the sweet result of their now-quenched hunger.
In this brief serenity was when Wendy would breath deeply and run her hands through Hook's thick black curls and he lay with his head upon her chest, listening to her pounding heart. She would purr into his ear loving words, always the same:
"You are gallant and adequate."
To which he would sorrowfully reply: "I am a wicked man."
She would then raise his face to meet hers and smile most adoringly. "My Kiss shall declare otherwise."
She leaned her face towards his, her lips pursed and willing...
And then the captain would awaken most suddenly. Always at this very moment would he awaken. Even in his dreams, he could not obtain that Kiss. And so the bitterness and disappointment within him continued to fester.
But this was not the greatest tragedy permeated from these reveries. For, you see, Wendy was haunted by the very same dreams.
However, for Wendy, the dreams were not propagated by a desire for redemption, but, similarly to Hook, they served as an unhealthy fulfillment for a primal need.
Many were the long and frustrating nights after little Anthony Pan's disappearance when Wendy and her husband Peter would turn to each other in their bed and make a grand attempt to resume a normal married life. They would stare endlessly into each other's eyes, the want for one another setting their broken hearts ablaze. When they could bear it no longer, Peter would franticly climb upon Wendy, hike up her nightdress, and struggle most pathetically to access her. Wendy held him tightly, hoping upon hope that *this* night, they would at last be able to go through with it. But always would their eyes again meet, and the impenetrable sadness within instantly killed all anticipation for just one moment of pleasure. Peter, proud as he was, would quickly turn from Wendy so she would not see him weep. And they would hence fall asleep with their backs shamefully faced toward each other.
But for Wendy, the night would seldom end at that.
The evil pirate Captain Hook had spent the better part of Wendy's early childhood as nothing more than a dark figure of her own imaginative creation – a faceless, merciless monster who tormented all the heroes and heroines of the nursery stories she told to her brothers. He was little more than a blue-eyed villain with an iron claw. Until Peter Pan appeared in her window and took her to Neverland, where she was to at last come face- to-face with this shadowy character in the flesh. A tall, dark, and intriguing man who brandished a pistol as if it were a beautiful woman, his piercing eyes so very enchanting to gaze upon. Wendy was never frightened by this man. In fact, she was rather charmed – until, that is, he dared to threaten the life of her beloved Peter Pan.
Hook had been very kind to her when he brought her aboard his ship, and she had found herself quite flattered by the eloquent captain's attention. But so naïve was she in believing it was not due to his demented plan for capturing Peter. She was wholly disappointed at this, as any young girl would be. He really had no interest in her at all, she thought. All he truly wanted was to see Peter dead. 'Twas doubly upsetting.
Wendy was very nearly a woman when she returned to Neverland to solve the riddle of Peter's mysterious growth. Possibly just as alarming was the fact that Hook was still alive and lurking about his ship. But he was, like her, different somehow. He did not seem quite so interested in defeating Peter any longer. Instead, his attentions appeared to be bent toward having Wendy for himself. She figured it was only another shallow attempt to damage Peter. So she filed it away in the back of her subconscious for later review, for she had only one man on her mind and in her heart.
She had given very little thought to the captain at all whence returning to London with her new husband in tow. Why would she ever have reason to? She was with the true love of her life, had three gorgeous children, and an existence in this world she would not have traded for all the glorious stars in Heaven. But her misty recollections of Captain Hook would soon have their day in the sun, following the most heinous tragedy to take place in Mrs. Pan's otherwise blissful life.
The name Hook is synonymous with heartbreak and bitterness, so it is of little wonder how his countenance came to creep upon Wendy's nightly reveries in the first place. But he was not merely a stagnant symbol for her grief in these dreams. He was so much more – things a conscious Wendy would never dare to contemplate. He was there, the dark and dangerous rogue, to satisfy every last one of Wendy's unfulfilled cravings. Everything she wished Peter would do, Hook did. And he would do so in such an impassioned manner as to reduce Wendy into an almost manic state as she allowed the captain to ravage her again and again. Even when he would claw at her with his cold iron hook, she would scream in delight, for pain and pleasure were all but inseparable in these dreams. The maddening frenzy would continue on and on until, finally, with one great release, Wendy's eyes would burst open. She could hear her heart racing and breath heavy, and she would quickly become aware that her nightdress was soaked through. Sometimes even, most dreadfully, she would awaken from these dreams and find her hand squeezed between her thighs.
And she would look over her shoulder to her husband, sleeping harshly and determinedly, and she would become awash with utter guilt and shame. How could she? How *dare* she? She loved Peter so completely – how could she possibly allow such illicit images slither like a tempestuous snake into her slumber?
But no matter how she strived, the dreams would continue, always following yet another desperate and vain attempt at making love to her husband. She knew that if they could only succeed, the dreams would cease. But neither did. I regret to tell you that there were some nights when she even anticipated the dreams, so dissatisfied and frustrated she was with her inability to give herself guiltlessly to Peter – even though the dreams would do little to alleviate her feelings of remorse. But sometimes, just as both she and Hook had come to understand, 'tis better to feel pain than nothing at all. And Wendy was so greatly frightened of the prospect of feeling nothing for Peter someday that only the shame of her dreams encouraged her to keep trying to reconnect with her husband.
The night that she and Peter put Anthony's things in the attic, Wendy was quite convinced that it was the first step in righting everything once again. It would be only a matter of time before they could be together in all aspects, and she would have no need for those dreadful dreams.
But then came the news that they would have to return to Neverland to find Anthony. Wendy's mind focused solely on this, and her thoughts rarely wandered to the captain. When they found that Hook had taken control of the island, she knew that they had to find Anthony and bring him home post haste. But alas, he was not inclined to leave Neverland, and Wendy acknowledged that she and Peter could never return. And she very nearly escaped the island unscathed. But that scoundrel Hook had clawed his way into their lives once more by stealing away their son. Wendy was determined to be strong upon confronting the captain again on Blind Man's Bluff. But seeing the wretched man again standing before her, she felt her whole body tense, and when he called her name, she dare not answer. How completely disgusted she was to find that he still affected her, even while she was awake and of sound mind.
Hook, having lost all abilities for empathy long ago – I daresay he may have been born without such an emotion – he felt nothing in the ear- piercing shriek that Wendy let loose upon whence he thrust his hook into her true love's gut. He was a pirate. He was a fiend. He knew of no other way to claim something as his. It was simply a necessity to destroy Peter Pan. And the fact that he was his mortal enemy made the gruesome task all the more acceptable.
Hook indeed now possessed everything Peter had ever loved.
At last, he had outdone The Boy. And most sweet of all, Wendy was completely his.
**!!WARNING!!** PLEASE READ:
This chapter is strictly R-RATED, but I felt I ought to include it so as to make clearer certain events and motivations for them taking place in future chapters (and some having already occurred). But it is 100% optional to the reader.
For those of you who would indeed rather skip this chapter, then I can give you the brief rundown: basically, this whole chapter deals with how Wendy and Hook have both had sexual dreams about each other – she in reaction to not being able to have "relations" with Peter after Anthony's disappearance; and he because, well, he has an unhealthy fixation on Wendy!
So, if you are sensitive to this sort of material, or you are disturbed at the thought of Captain Hook getting some action (keeping in mind that the version of Hook represented here is the one as portrayed by Jason Isaacs in the P.J. Hogan movie and not some campy Dustin Hoffman-Disney-Cyril Richard version), then don't bother reading any further.
For the rest of you, read on if you dare! (muhahaha!) Chapter XV......More comments please! (
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------
XV. IMPURE THOUGHTS
If you may have noticed a fleeting yet seemingly out-of-place tense interlude between Wendy and Captain Hook as they met face-to-face again for the first time on Blind Man's Bluff, I can assure you that this was not a frivolous occurrence, and I will take this time now to explain it fully.
You see, within Captain Hook's darkened consciousness, there lay but few sentiments other than those that make up his very favorite deadly poison – the very emotions that turn his eyes from forget-me-not blue to blood-red – and those are malice, jealousy, and disappointment. However, what you may be surprised to learn (and indeed not another soul but Hook himself is privy to this) is that deeper within the recesses of Hook's depraved mind and in the foggiest, long-forgotten corners of his black heart are but the tiniest hints of redemption – or rather, the yearning for redemption.
And it was just this hidden desire for something to break him free from the shackles of his own misery that was awakened within the pirate when first he ever laid eyes upon The Wendy so very long ago, gracefully dancing with Peter Pan among the fairies high above the treetops of Neverland.
Up until that moment, Captain Hook and Peter Pan had but one very important thing in common, which was a constant source of comfort for the begrudging pirate: they were both loners, each forever bound to their respective places in this world, and as such were both quite isolated...and thus unloved by anybody. Oh, they both had their adoring and loyal crews, but this was not quite the same as the particular devotion that was missing from their perpetual lives. Only Hook was aware of this deficit – Peter had no understanding or appreciation whatsoever of its existence. And it was this ignorance for such a marvelous and elusive gift among mankind that embittered Hook so deeply when he discovered that Peter had found it first. Why should The Boy get to find love when he did not even know what it was or what to even do with it? And such a lovely one at that. It was so cruelly unfair. And Hook was determined to deprive his nemesis of such a luxury.
And thus did Hook bring the Wendy aboard his ship and attempt to entice her away from the emotionally deficient Peter Pan and to join him instead. To his pleasant surprise, he found her quite charming, and he would daresay the feeling was mutual. She was wise beyond her years – far too wise and mature for one so inadequate as Peter Pan – and as such possessed a great reverence for Hook's ability to *feel* - even if a great majority of those feelings were marred in loathing. Even she, at such a tender age, could see as well as he that, sometimes, 'tis better to feel bitterness than nothing at all. And upon first seeing the girl bestow her precious smile upon him when asked if she would like to be a pirate, Hook soon realized that the benefits of disposing of Peter Pan once and for all could be far vaster than he anticipated. He would be rid of his mortal enemy *and* he would get to keep the lovely Wendy all for himself...a most marvelous plunder yet known.
No, Hook did not expect Wendy to come to him willingly. Despite all her wisdom, she was still but a child, and her spirit was already strongly bound to Peter Pan. And indeed, once he had her back aboard his ship – along with those grubby Lost Boys – she did not take too kindly to the notion that Hook had in all likelihood killed Peter, and she nobly proclaimed she would rather die than join him and his crew. He had no real intention of disposing of her, however. 'Twas not until he had realized Peter was still alive that Wendy was his last option left for getting to him. By this time, as was wont to happen, Hook's maliciousness and hatred far outweighed any other softer emotions that may have been threatening to contaminate his cold heart, and so he felt very little in the way of sympathy as he watched Wendy walk the plank in a last desperate effort to root out and defeat Peter. If he could succeed, he needn't be too unhappy – Peter's death would most certainly make up for losing Wendy.
But alas, neither happened. Peter rescued Wendy from the crocodile just in the nick of time. And Hook's attempt to undermine Peter's Happy Thoughts by taunting him with visions of Wendy's abandoning him backfired most dreadfully. Hook was but mere inches from finally doing in his great enemy when the fair Wendy tricked him quite cunningly – telling Hook she wished to give Peter a "thimble" and then proceeded to bestow upon the Boy the sweetest of kisses Heaven had hence created.
Hook stood and watched in sheer awe as this simple Kiss completely restored Peter and then some, leading to Hook's eventual – though temporary – defeat. It was at that very moment, when Hook witnessed Wendy definitively prove her devotion to Peter, that the captain first became aware that such a miracle as this could exist. It was the greatest treasure he had yet come across, he was sure of it. And like all great things in this world, Hook had to have it.
In the years following this event, Hook would occasionally find his mind wander to Wendy's Kiss and how it may redeem him should she be so kind as to give it to him. Not surprisingly, the Kiss was having some rather adverse side effects upon Peter – it was causing him to *think*. And to *feel*. And Peter discovered quickly to what anguish this could lead. Welcome to my callous world, Hook would think to himself with a sardonic grin as he watched Peter grow older and older.
And then, she came back.
The very second Hook laid eyes upon the breathtaking young woman proudly sauntering back into his cabin to fight for Peter, his great thirst for the sort of pleasure and redemption that only she could seemingly provide was piqued anew, and with greater intensity. And with this also came a new desire to acquire all that came with the Kiss – everything else that was attached to it. The Kiss only was no longer enough. *All* of Wendy must he have.
Hook tried several times to claim her Kiss as his, but she would let none but Peter take it from her. A great blow to his ego it was, but Hook believed that, once Peter was gone for good and Neverland was under the iron grasp of his hook, he could be satisfied enough with this. He was sadly mistaken.
That is when the dreams came.
Hook had very little to do to pass time in Neverland once the island was firmly in his control. No one dared challenge him, so he had no enemies to fight. Only his dark hobby for poisons and potions kept him occupied. And his dreams.
The inception of the dreams were varied, but the outcome always the same. Sometimes, they began aboard his ship where he lay sleeping, and sometimes they started among the grayness of the sullen Neverland clouds. Still other dreams commenced within the jungle or even under the ocean's surface. But always inside these spaces was Wendy. How she would look upon the decadent pirate's face with such warm eyes as she beckoned him forth toward her. Such a regard as this was enough to force the Devil himself into wistful submission, and so Hook could hardly resist.
Once upon her, she would take his hands in hers – yes, both hands, for in Hook's dreams, Peter had never claimed his right one – and she would lower him to the ground, or ocean floor, or cloud, depending on where this particular dream took place. And here would she dispose of any meddlesome clothing and then lay before him, arms outstretched, urging him to her. And with both his hands he would explore every inch of The Wendy, to her great and encouraging gratification. The feel of her skin under his corrupted fingertips made Hook's lust grow ever the more urgent until, finally, he had to lower himself fully upon her. Into his blue eyes she would cast such a look of burning want as to lay waste to any more moment's hesitation for his simmering passion to erupt.
Here, he would try to kiss her, but she would turn her chin upwards, and he would gladly press his lips to her throat instead, delighting in her soft coos of approval. And then, in a sudden burst of pure eagerness, she would fling her arms about his neck and wrap her legs around his waist. He would press himself harder upon her, almost crushing her, but object she did not at all. Their breathing would become increasingly frenzied until in perfect unison, her abdomen rising and lowered with his.
The impassioned pirate grappled at the ground beneath Wendy's hair to brace himself. And with one mighty drive forward, he took her. And when he did, how she would throw her head back and cry out his name to the stars.
"James!"
Their lust and the subsequent grunts it incited now firmly intermingled, Hook held tighter to Wendy, and she would violently dig her nails into his back, the pain from which only excited him further. At this point in time, he did not think about the Kiss. There would be time for that later on. Right now, he focused on the marvelous sensations aroused from his becoming one with the fair and elusive Wendy. All the precious gems and trinkets he had ever plundered could never amount to this treasure lying beneath him. And he would grow ever the more satisfied when Wendy would squeal of how she had never before experienced such pleasure – not even with Peter Pan.
This was all Hook needed to adequately bring the exhilarating sacrament to its delicious and spectacular conclusion. Quite happily did they both arrive at the apex together, their bodies tensing harshly before gradually releasing, settling beneath their cries of ecstasy lingering intertwined above their heads, the sweet result of their now-quenched hunger.
In this brief serenity was when Wendy would breath deeply and run her hands through Hook's thick black curls and he lay with his head upon her chest, listening to her pounding heart. She would purr into his ear loving words, always the same:
"You are gallant and adequate."
To which he would sorrowfully reply: "I am a wicked man."
She would then raise his face to meet hers and smile most adoringly. "My Kiss shall declare otherwise."
She leaned her face towards his, her lips pursed and willing...
And then the captain would awaken most suddenly. Always at this very moment would he awaken. Even in his dreams, he could not obtain that Kiss. And so the bitterness and disappointment within him continued to fester.
But this was not the greatest tragedy permeated from these reveries. For, you see, Wendy was haunted by the very same dreams.
However, for Wendy, the dreams were not propagated by a desire for redemption, but, similarly to Hook, they served as an unhealthy fulfillment for a primal need.
Many were the long and frustrating nights after little Anthony Pan's disappearance when Wendy and her husband Peter would turn to each other in their bed and make a grand attempt to resume a normal married life. They would stare endlessly into each other's eyes, the want for one another setting their broken hearts ablaze. When they could bear it no longer, Peter would franticly climb upon Wendy, hike up her nightdress, and struggle most pathetically to access her. Wendy held him tightly, hoping upon hope that *this* night, they would at last be able to go through with it. But always would their eyes again meet, and the impenetrable sadness within instantly killed all anticipation for just one moment of pleasure. Peter, proud as he was, would quickly turn from Wendy so she would not see him weep. And they would hence fall asleep with their backs shamefully faced toward each other.
But for Wendy, the night would seldom end at that.
The evil pirate Captain Hook had spent the better part of Wendy's early childhood as nothing more than a dark figure of her own imaginative creation – a faceless, merciless monster who tormented all the heroes and heroines of the nursery stories she told to her brothers. He was little more than a blue-eyed villain with an iron claw. Until Peter Pan appeared in her window and took her to Neverland, where she was to at last come face- to-face with this shadowy character in the flesh. A tall, dark, and intriguing man who brandished a pistol as if it were a beautiful woman, his piercing eyes so very enchanting to gaze upon. Wendy was never frightened by this man. In fact, she was rather charmed – until, that is, he dared to threaten the life of her beloved Peter Pan.
Hook had been very kind to her when he brought her aboard his ship, and she had found herself quite flattered by the eloquent captain's attention. But so naïve was she in believing it was not due to his demented plan for capturing Peter. She was wholly disappointed at this, as any young girl would be. He really had no interest in her at all, she thought. All he truly wanted was to see Peter dead. 'Twas doubly upsetting.
Wendy was very nearly a woman when she returned to Neverland to solve the riddle of Peter's mysterious growth. Possibly just as alarming was the fact that Hook was still alive and lurking about his ship. But he was, like her, different somehow. He did not seem quite so interested in defeating Peter any longer. Instead, his attentions appeared to be bent toward having Wendy for himself. She figured it was only another shallow attempt to damage Peter. So she filed it away in the back of her subconscious for later review, for she had only one man on her mind and in her heart.
She had given very little thought to the captain at all whence returning to London with her new husband in tow. Why would she ever have reason to? She was with the true love of her life, had three gorgeous children, and an existence in this world she would not have traded for all the glorious stars in Heaven. But her misty recollections of Captain Hook would soon have their day in the sun, following the most heinous tragedy to take place in Mrs. Pan's otherwise blissful life.
The name Hook is synonymous with heartbreak and bitterness, so it is of little wonder how his countenance came to creep upon Wendy's nightly reveries in the first place. But he was not merely a stagnant symbol for her grief in these dreams. He was so much more – things a conscious Wendy would never dare to contemplate. He was there, the dark and dangerous rogue, to satisfy every last one of Wendy's unfulfilled cravings. Everything she wished Peter would do, Hook did. And he would do so in such an impassioned manner as to reduce Wendy into an almost manic state as she allowed the captain to ravage her again and again. Even when he would claw at her with his cold iron hook, she would scream in delight, for pain and pleasure were all but inseparable in these dreams. The maddening frenzy would continue on and on until, finally, with one great release, Wendy's eyes would burst open. She could hear her heart racing and breath heavy, and she would quickly become aware that her nightdress was soaked through. Sometimes even, most dreadfully, she would awaken from these dreams and find her hand squeezed between her thighs.
And she would look over her shoulder to her husband, sleeping harshly and determinedly, and she would become awash with utter guilt and shame. How could she? How *dare* she? She loved Peter so completely – how could she possibly allow such illicit images slither like a tempestuous snake into her slumber?
But no matter how she strived, the dreams would continue, always following yet another desperate and vain attempt at making love to her husband. She knew that if they could only succeed, the dreams would cease. But neither did. I regret to tell you that there were some nights when she even anticipated the dreams, so dissatisfied and frustrated she was with her inability to give herself guiltlessly to Peter – even though the dreams would do little to alleviate her feelings of remorse. But sometimes, just as both she and Hook had come to understand, 'tis better to feel pain than nothing at all. And Wendy was so greatly frightened of the prospect of feeling nothing for Peter someday that only the shame of her dreams encouraged her to keep trying to reconnect with her husband.
The night that she and Peter put Anthony's things in the attic, Wendy was quite convinced that it was the first step in righting everything once again. It would be only a matter of time before they could be together in all aspects, and she would have no need for those dreadful dreams.
But then came the news that they would have to return to Neverland to find Anthony. Wendy's mind focused solely on this, and her thoughts rarely wandered to the captain. When they found that Hook had taken control of the island, she knew that they had to find Anthony and bring him home post haste. But alas, he was not inclined to leave Neverland, and Wendy acknowledged that she and Peter could never return. And she very nearly escaped the island unscathed. But that scoundrel Hook had clawed his way into their lives once more by stealing away their son. Wendy was determined to be strong upon confronting the captain again on Blind Man's Bluff. But seeing the wretched man again standing before her, she felt her whole body tense, and when he called her name, she dare not answer. How completely disgusted she was to find that he still affected her, even while she was awake and of sound mind.
Hook, having lost all abilities for empathy long ago – I daresay he may have been born without such an emotion – he felt nothing in the ear- piercing shriek that Wendy let loose upon whence he thrust his hook into her true love's gut. He was a pirate. He was a fiend. He knew of no other way to claim something as his. It was simply a necessity to destroy Peter Pan. And the fact that he was his mortal enemy made the gruesome task all the more acceptable.
Hook indeed now possessed everything Peter had ever loved.
At last, he had outdone The Boy. And most sweet of all, Wendy was completely his.