Author Note: Hey guys. I know I said that I was planning to update this story, but, obviously, school got me busy and junk. The reason is the fact that since Christmas break is coming forth, my teachers are cramming homework and classwork all this week and it really pushed me to the edge that I just want to sleep, god forbid how KO'd I was when I hit my pillow. Basically, in other words, I had yet another busy week and I couldn't get to it until now. But, Christmas Vacation has finally come and I managed to finish this story, non-stop. So here it is. Thank you to all those who reviewed and read this story. ^_^ Enjoy!
Be aware if the format is out of place. Thoughts she italic, lyrics centered, etc. etc., you get the drill.
~*I want to dedicate this story to a special guy who is special to me in so many ways who completely changed my world. Without him, I wouldn't be the strong person I am today.~*
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The year is March 3, 2003, the month when winter season finally ends. It was only a few more weeks until school will start and already high school students are heading to their schools, only to review for the upcoming test in the beginning of the school year. I, on the other hand, was busy trying to record my songs for the next album…
This was the only beginning of my toppled life…
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Chapter 1: Wishes: New Hope…
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"Okay, let's review the schedule for this coming month," began to speak a 25 year old young man with long brown hair tied up into a ponytail. Opening his briefcase with a wide smile, he took out a long list of the schedules that listed from every month of the year to the following years onward. Slowly, he adjusted his glasses and carefully looked at the document in his hand. "Let's see…you are scheduled to--"
The young girl beside him sighed tiredly as she listened to her manager's voice. Her gaze lingered outside the window, gazing at each tree flickering quickly through the speed of the car. Absentmindedly, she let her hand toy with her long honey brown hair. She sighed once more and put her right arm on the edge of the door and leaned on it. "Another ordinary day…" she muttered to herself as she kept her eyes to the window. On the other side of the mechanical transportation she is obligated to be in, the girl could clearly see the whole view of Tokyo, Japan in its finally days of winter. People were still clad in their overstuffed jackets and sweaters, wearing boots, a simply, yet long scarves that tightly went around people's necks, and a simple varieties of hats that warm people's heads. Everyone was doing his/her own bustling business, trying to earn a living and live a normal life.
Along the corners of a certain building with a crosswalk just in front of it, her eyes caught on a different clad of colors that brighten the dull atmosphere. Within that corner, donning the same uniform and the same color, with the exception of their overcoats, jackets, gender, etc., etc., is a group of high school teenage students, at least 10 of them, 5 girls, 5 boys, walked along the icy pavements, heading to their high school with all smiles and laughter. Again, as her eyes observed them, the girl sighed, with a gleam of longing in her green eyes.
"—and…this coming year, during the Fall Festival, you will be able to sing in Gaia--" The manager looked up from his paper to see his client spacing out. Sighing, he slowly took off his glasses and looked directly at her with a frown look. "Hitomi…"
"…"
"Hitomi Kanzaki!"
"….."
"Paging Hitomi Kanzaki! Manager Dryden Fassa wants you to come out of never, ever-land!"
The girl's eyes widened and looked at her manager. "Huh?" She looked up tiredly to see her manager's firm look. "Oh…it was only you…Dryden-san…Gomennasai…I wasn't paying attention…"
Dryden slowly shocks his head and looked at Hitomi with a softer, concern look than his previous expression. "Hitomi…is there something on your mind that you want to speak out?" he asked, gently touching her shoulder.
Momentarily, Hitomi gazed at the oversized hand on her shoulder, then she averted her eyes to her manager's concerned ones. At first, she opened her mouth to say something, yet, no words came out and Hitomi simply looked down. "No…not really…" she finally stated with the only phrase she could think of.
"Look…is the schedule too stressing for you? Did I make it a bit too busy for you? I can change it if you like," he said, trying to comfort her uneasiness at the moment.
Hitomi shock her head. "That's not it…its just…" Again, she paused in the middle of her sentence as she gazed into the gray, white streets of Tokyo to once more see the group of high schoolers turning around a corner. "Never mind…" she smiled weakly. "It's nothing really important anyways…" Carefully, she sat up and brushed her long hair to her back. "Do I have anything to do this week?"
Again, Dryden went to the paper. "Well…you do have a recording today in about an hour…but overall, that's practically it." He folded the paper and put back into his briefcase. "Aren't you happy that you have a few days off, Hitomi-chan?"
She only smiled and nodded slightly.
Hitomi Kanzaki, who turned 18 recently on, the biggest age experience that all teenagers have, is one of the most popular pop idols all across Japan, ranking number one since the beginning of her career four years ago. Deep in her heart's content, she loves to sing her heart. It makes her feel more inspired each time she sings and each time her fans would cheer for her and her enchanting songs. Unlike all the singers across her generation, Hitomi has a way to captivate people with her enchanting voice that somehow affects the person's thinks or makes them feel better from their unexplained dilemma. Hitomi was proud of everything she did, and she could not ask for anything more, but to make her fans happy.
Her parents have supported her all the way as she grew up to be the woman she is, guiding her to learn the stuff the real world has to offer. And through the start of her career, if it weren't for her manager Dryden Fassa, owner of the famous Fassa Records Corporation, her life would have not taken to a major step in her life.
She was happy, knowing that she has such great people in her life to help her on her way to adulthood and to inspire people through her voice.
Yet, now, those times can never be the same.
Hitomi was somehow relieved that she only has one thing to do for this whole entire week. At least for this week so she can catch on some sleep and finally call her older brother, who is currently at college and is most eager to hear from her in such a while. Through the tall buildings, she could see that her destination is not that far as she saw a familiar logo on top of a certain building.
"We are almost there, Hitomi," said Dryden with a smile. "And you must be very happy to see him again after one month has passed."
"Yeah…hopefully he would brighten my day," she said with an empty smile. "If only he calls more often…"
Dryden didn't noticed the empty smile and the hidden sarcasm in her voice, and so, without any heed to concern with the minor details of her empty expression, he was happy to see Hitomi finally becoming her bubbly self, although she seems a bit more distant than usual. "That's my girl," he said. "I may be your manager, and we may be communicating only through business in front of the other clients of this record deal, I still care for you as if you are my own little sister." With a huge lopsided grin, he ruffled Hitomi's hair, making her have that annoyed expression on her face.
But, despite that, Hitomi smiled from that comment and nodded her head. "Thank you…Dryden-san…"
~`~`~`~`~`~`
After the few minutes of driving through the busy streets have passed, Hitomi and Dryden have finally made it to Fassa Records Incorporation Building. Right away, Hitomi was sent to the recording area where she would start recording the second to the last song for her next album that will be coming to music stores everywhere by the end of the winter season.
Removing her pink woolen scarf around her neck, Hitomi gently laid it on the chair and took off her jacket. Gently matting her hair down, she made her way to the recording box, grabbing a huge black headphone from the assistance there.
"Okay, Hitomi, we are ready to record!" said Dryden from the control panel with his audio assistant. "Any time you are ready, girl!"
Hitomi nodded silently as she put the headphones on. Adjusting the microphone in front of her, she adverted her eyes to the control panel window and gave them a thumbs up.
Dryden nodded and patted the audio assistant. "Okay, Fujita-san, she's ready."
"Hai! Hitomi-san…ready in…one…two…three!"
After seconds passed, music started to filter through her headphones. Quickly, she let her mind absorb feel of the music as continued through its beginning beat. When the music started to go differently, Hitomi began to open her mouth and started to sing:
Woe Baby nani wo miteru no?
Mukai kaze sono mukou ni
Donna mirai ga wo hitomi hisome egau no?
"How is she doing so far?" Dryden asked.
"So far, so good. She's doing pretty well."
Oh baby sabishii yoru ni wa
Akiru hodo denwa shita
Dakedo honto no sabishisatte kienai....
"Hmm…pretty good feeling to it," said Dryden, tapping his foot to the beat and snapping his fingers.
(never say never say never ever say)
Around her recording, Hitomi held a distasteful look on her face while she was singing. Some thing in her mind does not seem to appeal to her, and it seems it is distracting her from the feeling of the song. Yet, she continued to pursue it.
Woe toki wo koeru tabi kizuku ne
(every night every night never ever say)
Kokoro wa hate…
Hitomi could not take any more. "No matter how many times I try…this song won't…"
Suddenly, Hitomi took off her headphones and signaled her hands to let the people on other side to stop. Fujita nodded his head and stopped the song abruptly with a flick of the button in the control panel. Again with his concerned face, Dryden headed to the recording area.
"Hitomi, what's wrong?" Dryden asked, heading towards Hitomi's way after entering through the door to the control panel.
Hitomi answered with a sad look on her face, "I'm sorry…this song…its just…"
"No, Hitomi, I think it's a great beat…"
She winced, shaking her head abruptly. "No, no, its not that…its just that…you know…"
Dryden couldn't understand where she was going at. Intently, he thought about Hitomi's broken sentences until his face finally lightened to an acknowledgement. Fully understanding where Hitomi is going at, Dryden shook his head. "Oh no, not again, Hitomi. This is the fifth time you said it wouldn't be good for this album. You have rejected all those good songs, but, why are being so picky at this time? Especially since it is almost time for the album to hit the stores?"
"I'm sorry…when I sung that song…I feel as if I couldn't connect to it, Dryden-san," she said, slowly letting her eyes down, putting her right hand above her heart. "You know how I am…if I couldn't connect with it…I wouldn't be able to bring the harmony and feeling to it."
"Hitomi-chan…"
Hitomi slowly let her hands hold her head. "I'm not sure what's wrong with me today…I don't quite feel like myself today…nothing…seems quite right today…"
"Maybe you just miss your boy-toy after a few weeks of not seeing each other," said a deep voice across, interrupting Hitomi's sad thoughts.
Hitomi's downcast eyes suddenly looked up to view a young man at the age of 18, dressed in a sharp matter to match his pretty boy looks. He smiled, showing his shiny white teeth. In his hand, he held a single yellow rose and approached to Hitomi.
"Yukio…" she said absentmindedly, still a bit awestruck from the sudden introduction of his so-called famous "boyfriend."
"Well, well, if isn't Yukio Nami," said Dryden. "I haven't seen you for a long time."
"It is great to see you, Dryden, but I am truly great to see Hitomi. How are you doing, my sweet?" he said with his most flattering voice, extending the flower to Hitomi.
Gruffly, she took the flower from his hand and looked away, angered by his sudden alluring tone of voice. "Fine, thank you," she said rather abruptly without even to bother asking the same thing.
"Ooh, why so touchy touchy today?" he asked, shrugging the matter of Hitomi's behavior off. "What did I do to make you so mad?"
"Flattery doesn't get you anywhere, Yukio, you know I don't like that kind of talk," she said, again with her abrupt and furious voice.
"But really," Yukio said, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder. "What seems to be the matter?"
Dryden sighed and left the couple to deal with their own problems. He grabbed a seat and sat down, watching the two act.
"You should know what the problem is, Yukio," Hitomi said, looking at him square in the face.
"What did I do?" he asked with a clueless face in his blue eyes.
"What?! You haven't noticed how long I have been waiting for you to call from your trip to the States? You could of dropped in a line and ask how I was doing," she said.
"Hitomi, I'm sorry," he said, suddenly remorseful. "I didn't know that I would hurt you this badly."
For a while, the young idle was quiet. She looked at him and looked at the ground, thinking thoughtfully of his sincere words. Slowly, Hitomi turned to him, her emerald eyes looking into his blue ones.
"Well…" her eyes begin to soften, giving into his sincere voice. "At least I know that you are okay," she said a bit a softer. "And at least you gave me a flower…so…" Hitomi looked up and smiled. "I forgive you…"
Yukio smiled and gave her a brief hug. "This time," she added, extending her index finger.
"Well…since that you guys patched things up," said Dryden as he stood up from his seat. "Hitomi…about the album…"
"Dryden," she interrupted, looking at his eyes. "Excuse me…but…if you don't mind…can I use a different song?"
"Hmm…" he thought, putting his hand under his chin. "Well…I don't see why not…if you really like-"
"Change to a different song?" asked Yukio, somehow surprised. "Hitomi…what song are you singing?"
"Umm…Listen to my Heart…why?"
"Hitomi…that song should be put in there," he said with a rather abrupt tone.
Taken back by this sudden outburst, Hitomi gave a curious look on her face. "But…Yukio…you should know that I don't like songs that don't follow what the basic th-"
"Yes means yes Hitomi! That song should be put on there!"
"Why?"
"Because, Hitomi!" he retorted, crossing his arms across his chest. "Besides, if the album would be coming out within several days or so, people won't notice the crappy job you did with the theme. I know, because I've been through the phase as you."
Hitomi looked down to the floor, as his words went in one ear. She could feel almost the tears welling up in her eyes, yet, she tried her best to sustain the tears, biting her bottom lip in the process. It was not the fact that Yukio is putting her down, it is the fact of how he said it with a sudden abruptness. Likewise, Hitomi knew Yukio is like this, from all the months she known him, although at times she feels like she does not know him at all. For all the years, Hitomi knew he is rash, hostile when he is not in a good mood, abrupt with his words, yet, kind and caring whenever he is around Hitomi and not once was mean to her, yet, harsh at times. Especially at this time of year.
"-You get what I am saying right Hitomi?" he asked her, finishing the long, lecture-like talk. Simply, Hitomi just nodded and shock her head to get rid of the tears. "It doesn't matter…though…I like him for being who he is."
Yukio smiled, satisfied with the answer. Dryden just sighed and patted Hitomi's shoulder comfortingly. "Okay, Hitomi, since you don't have a lot things to do, we can do your recording tomorrow," he suggested.
"But…are you sure?" she asked, guilty if she leaved her work undone and letting the crew down.
"Yes, all of us agrees that you just need some rest right now. You said yourself that you don't feel like yourself right?" Hitomi nodded at Dryden's assumption. He was right in both targets. "Well…then don't worry about, Hitomi-chan. You can come back tomorrow and try again. I bet you will act like yourself tomorrow."
"Okay, Dryden-san, if you say so," she said with a smile. Slowly, she bowed before him. "Arigatou…"
Dryden shook his hand. "No need for thanks, Hitomi. After all the work you put into, you deserve it."
Hitomi smiled and nodded her head. "Well, I'll be heading home now." She bowed one more time and grabbed her coat and scarf from the chair. She was about to exit when Yukio called.
"Hey, Hitomi," he said, back to his hefty voice again. "Why don't I take you out to dinner?" She looked at him curiously. "Don't worry, I'll bring you somewhere worthwhile."
Just that comment made Hitomi smile with anticipation and hook her arm around his. Yukio smiled and led her towards the door.
~`~`~`~
In a classy restaurant near Shibuya Park, Hitomi sat in her seat, playing with her food absentmindedly. Her eyes are completely expressed with boredom. Like everyone else, every person should be rather flattered to go to a classy, expensive restaurant, with decorations of all kind and chandeliers that are made of entirely of glass in the middle of the restaurant, and serving all kinds of expensive cuisine they can ask for from exquisite pineapple cheesecake to expensive champagne. It would be like a dream come true for every person, other than Hitomi, famous pop idol all across Japan. Instead of showing great excitement, to her, it was a…routine.
It is not the fact that she is bored of going to this classy restaurant known as "Elegance," it is the fact that every single time Yukio takes her out, it is always the same restaurant and the same seating area where every single paparazzi would be snapping their cameras like leeches, putting headlines on magazines "Hot Couple: Akina and Yukio Nami…two famous pop idols who found each other," or "How to be the beautiful Akina: Details inside." It was not only here, but everywhere she can think of. And every single time the two couples walk around, from each store they come out of and from each studio, mall, park, school, etc., etc., those "leeches" would be there.
Not to mention, Hitomi was completely annoyed by the conversation they have. In each and every sentence, Yukio would always mention things that he done, in other words, a conversation where Hitomi could only hear "I," "me", and what not. Talk about egotistical.
Hitomi simply sighed and commenced playing with her food. Likewise, the paparazzi are cramming in the window, trying to obtain great shots of Yukio and her, as her boyfriend started to talk, saying the old same thing.
"You know…Hitomi…when I went to Hawaii on vacation…I saw all these girls checking me out. Hehe, I'm soo lucky to be famous all over the place. It's too bad that I have a girlfriend," he said, with a hint of pride in his voice as he took a sip of his champagne.
Again, Hitomi sighed, wishing that she would go home now. Without anything better to do than just listen to Yukio, playing with her food, and trying to avoid the camera flashes, Hitomi let herself gaze outside, to see many people walking along the sidewalks, smiling joyously as ever. She could see a group of girls, with shopping bags in their arms, chatting gleefully, passing by the restaurant. Passing by the girls where a group of boys, somehow shoving themselves playfully as they crossed the street. Then, in came a young couple, a woman huddling against her man from the cold, and the man comforting her with his arm.
"All the people around seem so happy. I also live the same life as them…even though I live a bit more high class than them…but…why…am I not happy?" she thought, looking away from the window. Slowly, Hitomi looked up at Yukio, seeing him waving to a waiter for the bill. "Why does it seem now…that each day goes by slower and slower?" She looked at her watch to see the time. "7:30 p.m." it read. They have only been there for only an hour and seemed like forever for her to get this day done.
"Hitomi…let's go," Yukio said suddenly as he got up from his seat, leaving the bill inside the black holder. Hitomi shock her head from her thoughts and smiled, standing up as well.
~`~`~`~`~`
The bitter cold hit Hitomi's warm face as they headed outside the restaurant. Quickly, she cowered into her scarf, shivering uncontrollably from the icy winds from the wintry sky.
"Hey look! It's Akina! It's Akina!" said a youngster amongst the crowd, pointing her tiny finger to Hitomi. People passing by looked up and their faces brighten up from the bitter cold.
"And…its Yukio Nami!" said a young woman, squealing to see the most handsome man all around Japan. Yukio smirked, showing his sparkling white teeth and winked at the girl. The young girl just melted from that very look.
The little girl ran up to Hitomi, holding a single piece of paper and pen. "Akina…can I have your autograph? Pretty please?" she asked with the most adorable face. Hitomi couldn't resist and kneeled down, grabbing the pen and paper from the little girl's hands gently and wrote her signature.
"Yeah, me too!"
"Me too!"
"Can you sign mine too?!"
People all around started crowding Hitomi. Slowly, Hitomi finished her signature and gave it to the little girl. "Thank you so much!" she greeted with a bow.
"You are very much welcome," Hitomi said with a gentle smile. She then went to the second person and signed her autograph. For the next remaining minutes, Hitomi was signing autographs for her fans, from young to the adolescence. She couldn't help but feel the warmth within her heart to see their smiling faces. She loved her fans dearly and would do anything for them.
After signing for a little boy, Hitomi slowly looked up to see a crowd of teenage men, ranging from 21 to 17 as they crowd Hitomi with smiles. One man stepped up, with medium sized hair that parted in the middle of his forehead. "Can you sign this, Akina-san. My girlfriend is a huge fan. She would come, but she is nervous to approach you."
Hitomi smiled and took a magazine of herself from him to sign. "What is her name?" she asked.
"Her name is Yukari Uchida," he said with a smile. "She's not the type to be shy, but somehow, when she sees celebrities, she gets all shy." Slowly, he pointed above the crowd to a group of girls looking directly at Hitomi with smiles. There was one with long blonde wavy hair with purple eyes, smiling excitedly. Then there was another that almost had the same features as the other girl, except her long hair is strawberry blonde and she is a few inches taller than the other. She smiled as well and whispered into her ear. The girl looked up and both squealed. Next to the girl was another with layered red-brownish hair, looking down at the ground with a shy look on her face.
"She's the one with the brownish-red hair," he said with a smile.
Hitomi smiled and waved to her, which shocked the girl to bits. The girl, still with shocked eyes, hesitantly, waved back, with a small smile slowly forming in her face. "Much better," thought Hitomi and wrote her penname. Hitomi smiled and handed the paper to the man. "Thank you so much," he said, bowing down.
Hitomi smiled, and another man approached her. He is older looking than the rest of his friends, yet he is still young, about the age of 21, with long blonde hair with nice azure eyes that Hitomi ever seen. And his features almost look exactly like the guy before. He smiled and handed the paper and pen to her. "Hi, umm…this is for my girlfriend…Eries," he said, somehow a tint of blush hinting on his cheek.
"Don't worry, its no problem. A lot of people are shy around celebrities right?" she said and signed it.
The man smiled and thanked her.
Hitomi smiled and watched the group of people head towards the direction of the ocean. They were all laughing, as they coupled up. "I wish…I had friends like those…they look so happy," she thought, her eyes still kept onto the group before her. She was about to turn around when she felt something watching her. Hitomi looked up towards the group again. Their backs where turned to her, and she could of sworn she saw someone looking at her. Hitomi could have sworn she seen something brownish-red eyes looking at her.
"Hitomi…" said Yukio from behind, tapping her shoulder.
"Hmm…yes?" she responded, turning to her boyfriend.
"Let's go," he ushered, letting his arm lightly touch her shoulder.
Hitomi nodded and followed him.
~`~`~`~`~`
"Dryden-san…look!" Fujita said as he came rushing in, holding a piece of paper in his hand.
"Oh, so it did came in!" said Dryden, rather nervous. He quickly grabbed the paper from Fujita and read the contents. Scanning his eyes through the paper, his face suddenly paled.
"Dryden-san…what is it?" he asked, with a worried face on his expression on his face.
"I-iie…this…couldn't be…how did this happen?" he asked, taking his wide eyes off the paper.
"What is happening?"
"I guess…my predictions were right…"
~`~`~`~`~`
Hitomi looked to her right of the window, to see the beautiful full moon above the night sky. Under it, reflecting its luminescent glow, is the ocean, looking spectacular as ever. She couldn't help but give a smile. She has never seen the moon glitter beautiful in its own reflection in the water, making the ripples of the ocean look so…nostalgic.
"Yukio!" she excitedly said. "Can we go see the ocean?" While driving, Yukio looked at her, seeing her tiny finger pointing to the ocean. He simply sighed and pushed on the gas. "Yukio?"
"No…not now, Hitomi," Yukio said with a gentle smile. "It's too cold to go out over there."
"I don't care if it is cold out there," she said, frowning a bit by his answer. "I just want to see the ocean. It looks so beautiful. Look at the sky, I could see it so clearly and the stars, so beautiful in great numbers." She looked at him with pleading in her eyes. "Please Yukio? I rarely get to see the sky like this since…4 years ago. Come on, Yukio…"
Yukio frowned and pushed the gas even more. "Like I said before, Hitomi," he said, his breathing becoming shallow as he tried sustain his anger. In all honesty, he didn't want to get out there himself, for reasons that cannot be explained to anyone but himself. "It is TOO cold to go out to the ocean at this time. Especially since you are a pop idol now, you should not get sick because you have fans to not disappoint. And YOU have that damn album to make before the deadline!"
Hitomi looked hurt now, her expression from excitement to hurt. "But…"
Suddenly, Yukio slammed the breaks, letting the car veer a bit from the sudden gesture of the controller. Hitomi screamed fearfully as the car's backside almost swerved into the bumper of the road. Soon, the car stopped completely, the back only one inch a way from the fenders. For a while, Hitomi panted uncontrollably. She was still in shock about the whole dilemma. Hitomi slowly let her eyes avert to Yukio to see his red face, flustered with rage. He was pretty much pissed off.
"No BUTS Hitomi!" he retorted, pointing his shaky finger at Hitomi's face. "You will listen to me, and listen to me good! Just because you have the time to go out DOES NOT MEAN you can go wherever you want! And I won't risk you get hurt or even get sick! So stop your stupid fantasies of going places that are beautiful! You don't need those imaginations anymore! You are not a little kid, you got that?!"
Hitomi couldn't move, her eyes shocked from the sudden abruptness. She quivered and her eyes grew teary. How could Yukio say such things?
"Tch, in the world of the rich and famous, we don't those anymore. Because we have everything we could ask for! You should be grateful that you live in a world of luxury!" He took a breath for a moment and commenced. "Right now…you should come with me to the bar. Most of my friends want us to meet them there since I haven't seen them a long time since my trip to Hawaii. And its mandatory you come with me…got it!?"
Hitomi nodded slightly. "Good," he said with a smile and started the car. As the car headed to their destination, she could feel her heart almost break into two. She slowly let her right hand go above her heart. She looked down to the ground and held a grim face, knowing for the fact that tears are now streaking her cheek.
~`~`~`~`~`~
That night, after much boredom in the bar, Hitomi let out a breath that she never thought she never held long as she opened her door to her mansion house. Her house, of course to all celebrities, cannot compare to everyone else in the suburban homes. It was magnificent, a three story mansion with fabulous furniture of all kinds. Hitomi's house was colored tanned white, with the rims of the windows and such are outlined with a brownish-tan color. Slowly, after crossing the stairs to her giant entryway, she opened the door and slammed the door quickly. After the events that occurred, she does not want to see Yukio's smile and his alluring eyes preying on her.
Hitomi leaned her back against the door, feeling the slight coldness within. She heaved a sigh, trying to sustain the tears coming from her eyes. After a few moments, Hitomi leaned off the door and head towards the kitchen. She didn't eat much from the restaurant and now that hours have gone by, Hitomi is now starving.
Turning on the lights, Hitomi could see that no one is home. "I guess she went home early," Hitomi said, referring to her reliable maid who she often chats with. "And I was going to make her something to eat too…oh well…I guess I'm alone…again…"
Hitomi made her way to the refrigerator and opened it, to only find soda pops of all kinds, bottled waters, expired milk, vegetables that have seen better days, and opened champagne bottles. Hitomi gave a sigh and closed it and opened the freezer to see almost everything bare, except the signal cookies and cream ice cream carton that she bought recently. "I guess this has to do," Hitomi said and grabbed the carton of ice cream.
She opened it to only find a small portion of it. "I guess I ate a lot of it before." She grabbed a spoon and made her way to her family room. Slowly, she sat herself onto her cream leather couch and started scooping away, turning on the television in the process.
From at least thirty minutes, Hitomi watched television and ate the rest of her remaining ice cream. Of course, to her trainer who comes over every day, would scold her for eating ice cream and breaking her daily diet routine but she did not care. She was hungry and she wouldn't let that measly diet get to her. In a middle of a drama show, Hitomi watched two people, a guy and a girl, walk along the corridors of the school. They were talking how they were doing so far in their life. They have known each other and they used to love each other a lot, yet circumstances have come about that drew them apart for some time. In the end, they still loved each other, even if time tore them apart.
Hitomi gave a sigh and turned off the television. She could not stand anymore romance, since hers is not going too well like on television. So, she sat there, staring into the blank television screen, with her ice cream carton on top of her glass coffee table with a pink orchid plant as the centerpiece.
During those moments of silence, Hitomi started to think about the events that took place a few hours ago. She thought about the group of people she signed autographs for, of how the young man with brown hair, the other young man with blonde hair, the girl with reddish-brown hair, and the other two girls with strawberry/natural blonde hair were going on with life so happily together. In their facial expressions, there was not a brief moment of troubles in their lives or even about the importance of their lives. It is as if they were hanging out like little kids, without to worry about working to earn a living or going to school to earn an education. It only made Hitomi sad. She looked around herself, seeing no friends or people to talk to. It was only her and the quietness of her house. It was huge, luxurous, and fancy, yet quiet.
Sighing, Hitomi slowly sat up. She tossed the empty ice cream carton inside the trashcan and went up her spiral stairs to her room. Lying down on her soft bed, she reached to her nightstand to grab her cordless telephone and dialed a number. After typing in the numbers, Hitomi put the phone next to her ear and listened to the ringing for a while.
"Hello, Mamoru Kanzaki here…21 years old…single…"
Hitomi laughed at the greeting. "Hey, Oniichan…its me," she said, with a sad smile.
"Hitomi-chan? Is it you??"
"Yes, its me…"
"My gosh, I was wandering when you are going to call. I was getting a little worried for my little sis…"
"I know, I'm sorry…it must have been…a year since I last talked to you. I really wanted to talk to you, but, apparently my schedule was busy with…you know…idol stuff…"
"Hey, hey, its okay, you don't need to apologize. I understand how busy your life is…ever since you became one four years back…"
"Yeah, I know, I feel so…"
"Don't even think about saying the G word. Didn't I say it is not your fault?" Hitomi smiled at her brother's comment. "So what's up? Anything new?"
"Well, I finally have a break for at least a few days from my career. Dryden-san gave me a few days off since I haven't been myself lately."
"Been yourself? Okay, what's going on Hito-chan?"
Hitomi was hesitant at first. She was silent for a moment, averting her eyes to view her balcony. "Well…you see…I feel as if…I am miserable, Mamoru…"
"Now how can "Akina," the greatest pop idol of all time, be soo miserable? I mean, come on, you've got it made. I mean, you gave me the most expensive car for my birthday last year and you still have money to spare to buy Okaasan and Otousan expensive stuff."
"It's not that…but…I can't really…explain it you know…"
"Has that bastard been treating you good?"
"Oniichan…not again with your threatening voice. Yes, he has been treating me nice."
"Alright, because you know, if a guy treats you badly, he doesn't deserve you. Or better yet, you don't deserve being treated like a tool to get his fame higher..."
"Oniichan! Don't say such things. Don't worry, he is not using me or anything…"
"He better not…or I'll give him a thing or two…maybe I'll have my
friends gang up on him."
"It is so typical of you Oniichan, but I still love you anyway," Hitomi said with a smile and giggled.
"Aww, stop it, you're making blush…and in front of the guys too. Shit, now they're laughing at me. God, shut up you guys, I'm talking to my sis alright?" Laughter was heard and Hitomi couldn't help but smile.
"So, how is college life in Tokyo U?"
"Shit, it's tight down here, get to do whatever you want. But, they do work you hard. But, it is a good thing that this is my last year. I'll be graduating this spring."
"Really?!" said Hitomi with a exasperated voice. "Oh my god…why did I forget? Oh my god…oh my god…I hope I have a schedule for-"
"Hitomi calm down…you would know otherwise since Okaasan was going to call you up about that. Hehe, but yeah, I am graduating…but I sure will miss my friends and my time here. Especially that time when a high schooler, going to senior this year, beat up his older, college bro here in a Kendo competition."
"One of your friends?"
"Yup, you know, the guy with the aqua hair?"
"Hmm…oh yes, yes, him. His younger brother beat him Kendo? That's amazing."
"I know." Loud shouts were heard from the other side, but laughter was soon replaced. "Haha, he heard me and started dissing me off. But, it's cool though, we always play around."
"Yeah…"
"Hitomi…"
"Hmm?"
"What's wrong?"
Hitomi's eyes widened. "Huh? Oh…nothing really…"
"Hmm…doesn't sound nothing…"
"Umm…"
"Is there something you are not telling me?"
"Umm…" Hitomi would tell everything to her older sibling, yet, she didn't want to talk about what happened a few hours ago with Yukio and his sudden outburst. She cares about Yukio and she does not want to put in the wrong impression to her brother. So, as much to her dismay, Hitomi simply smiled and said, "Oh no, it's just that…time really passes by you know…"
"Hmm…yeah I have to agree with you…it has been a while since I last seen you too. Well, I did see you on television from time to time, but I haven't spoken to you in person. Damn, reality of the world is always cruel."
"Oniichan…"
"Yeah…"
"I have a question."
"Okay, spill…"
"Do you feel happy?"
"Happy? Happy about what?"
"I mean, are you happy to live the life you are in?"
"You mean…living a normal life?"
"Yes…"
"Of course! It's hard, but it's a lot of fun too. You get to go to clubs, karaoke, restaurants of all kinds, travel the world…meeting new people…falling in love…"
"Hehe, I see…"
"But, your life isn't much different except you got it easy…"
"It's not all that easy, you know…with all the recording, live concerts, and trying to avoid every camera is such a hard thing to do…"
"Oh…shit…I have to go, Hitomi…"
"What? Why?!"
"I have a meeting today for Anime Club, and I am their president. I'm sorry to cut you so short. It just came suddenly because SOMEONE didn't tell me about it!" He was referring to one of his friends.
"It is okay, Oniichan…"
"Well, I hope everything is going well over there…"
"Mmm…I hope yours is too."
"And Hitomi…"
"Hmm?"
"Follow what is in your heart…do whatever is right to make you happy. I hope to hear from you again, Hitomi-chan…"
"Me too…I miss you soo much, Oniichan…"
"Me too. I'll tell Okaasan and Otousan your regards."
"Okay, bai bai, Aishiteru…"
"Aishiteru too, Hitomi, ja ne…"
~`~`~`~`~`~`
Hitomi looked at herself in the mirror, brushing her long hair smoothly with her brush. It was an hour since she last talked to her brother and she recently took a shower to warm herself up from the cold. She sat herself up and looked around her room to see the entire record album awards she received, the pictures she has taken with other famous celebrities, and pictures of her family. Most of the time, she looked at the pictures of her family. She could see a funny picture of Mamoru and herself bullying around playfully. She thought about that picture, remembering that day fully when her brother was off to college. They were simply talking when her brother suddenly splattered some food on her face. Angrily, with a smile of course, threw the same gunk at her brother and from then on, a food fight started to come about. Hitomi's mother couldn't help but take the hilarious picture of them, filthy from head to foot. It was only after the picture taken that Mamoru and Hitomi threw the gunk at their parents and another round of food fighting have started.
The young idol smiled and looked at the picture next first to find a picture of her whole family in her first premiere of her concert. Slowly, Hitomi closed her eyes and remembered that day, knowing how she used to have major stage fright. She was in the back, with her mother, her father, and her brother, as she recalled. Hitomi could only laugh, remembering how her brother tried to make funny jokes to ease down the nervousness, her mother giving her sweets to make her cheery, and her father…well, let's just say that he did a lot of crazy things to make her feel embarrass. Hitomi shook her head and shivered by the eerie thought of her father's crazy mind, but, she smiled because she loved her father for who she is. Right after the concert, which astounded a lot of people in the crowd, Hitomi heard a flood of cheers coming outside. Tears of happiness streaked her cheek as she smiled profoundly, telling her family about it. Her family too was happy, especially Mamoru who jumped up and down with Hitomi, doing a victory dance in the process. Dryden took the time to ask one of the backstage managers to take the picture of all them, so that when the picture is developed, as he said to Hitomi, she can hang this up in her new home and remember her first concert debut. Of course, years later, Hitomi could still remember. That day was the moment of her life that changed everything.
After a while, Hitomi looked away from the pictures. With a slow pace, she made her way to the balcony, opening the sliding doors to the cold outdoors. She kneeled down towards the railing and looked out into the open. For a while, she let the cold wind blow against her, letting the peacefulness calm her down.
Before long, the memories from four years ago started to filter her mind from the prolong silence. Her memories of those years were the mark that determined the life of the famous pop idol "Akina." Before her life as a pop idol, Hitomi was a normal girl who loves to sing from her heart's content. Although she is smart, she is creative and her singing and writing music explains most of her creative talents. Her parents did not decide the path she chosen. They supported her all the way, whatever she chooses in her life. And they believed that she is wiser than her years. And Mamoru was there, of course, helping her practice by playing the guitar to heighten her voice, and teaching her the basics of writing. After all, like brother like sister and siblings always help each other out.
Now, four years later, she is here, in a castle-like home with all the things she can ask for. "But…why am I sad?" she asked thoughtfully. "Why do I feel as if…I am bored? As if…I feel that my life is so…incomplete?"
Memories started to filter her mind once more, when times was carefree and joyfully. She could remember a Christmas with her family, seeing her brother graduate middle school and high school, celebrating a family reunion with her distant relatives. These memories was the former life she used to live before this one. And somehow, the effect of all this affected her greatly.
She leaned off the rails and looked up into the sky. A single tear slid down her cheek and fell to the marble ground below. Then, another came, and another, finally, Hitomi began to dry those pouring tears.
"What's wrong with me?!!" she screamed deliriously, screaming at the top of her lungs.
Slowly, she laid on her knees, trying to control those tears. "Please…I want to know…I want to know what is bothering me? Why my past is haunting me at this moment." She let the tears sink in, her heart withering one-by-one, uttering the hidden feelings she kept inside.
Time truly passed by her, and she never got the time to even know what is happening to her family. Time is so cruel to her.
"I'm…all alone…"
Hitomi froze. She slowly pulled herself up and looked around herself. Inside, the house was quiet with no noise of anything in there. There was no shadow lurking about, no video game noises. She looked outside. There was not a single soul outside, talking pleasantly to another as the hour passes by. Everything seems as if time have suddenly stopped around her.
Something glimmered above the sky that caught Hitomi's wandering eyes. Hitomi slowly looked up to see a shooting star cross the starry sky. Hitomi leaned on the rails once more and kept her eyes on the shooting star. Her eyes soon reflected amazement, as she watched it skim through the sky. "So…pretty…" Suddenly, Hitomi's mind clicked. Slowly, Hitomi folded her hands, as if she was praying, and closed her eyes.
"I wish…I wish that my life would change," she began, her voice sounding hopeful. "I wish to live a life…where everything doesn't seem so complicated, with no one to bother about my personal life. I wish to break the walls that are bounding me…and experience something worthwhile." Slowly, she opened her eyes. "I wish…that I will never be alone again…"
The shooting star disappeared into the sky as Hitomi finished her wish. With a smile, Hitomi went back into her house, closed the door securely, turned off the lights, and went to sleep.
~`~`~`~`~`
Somewhere in Downtown Tokyo, overlooking the ocean, a young man stood there, looking out into the horizon. His eyes soon caught something in the sky and looked up to see a shooting star. He smiled and closed his eyes.
"Heey!" The boy opened his eyes and looked to his right to see a man with long blonde hair waving to him. "What are you doing there by yourself?!"
"Nothing that concerns you," the man yelled jokingly. "I'm just thinking!"
"It's like you…anyways, come on!
We're heading back to my place to have a movie party bash!"
"Alright, I'll be up there!"
He began to walk only to stop once more. Slowly, his brown-reddish eyes scan the dark blue sky to find the shooting star disappeared. With another smile, he turned and ran to his friends.
In the sky above, where the shooting star disappeared, a glimmer of light started to gather in one smile hip and brightly burst to the light the sky. In that very spot, as the light receded, a brightly new star glimmered in the sky. A new hope is about to be reborn.
~`~`~`~`~` ~`~`~`~`~`~
Songs used (part of it): Listen to my heart by BoA (Not mine, rightfully belongs to BoA)
~`~`~`~`~` ~`~`~`~`~`~
Author's note: I apologize if this took so long. Apparently, I didn't get to this because I was still trying to organize it. Apparently, this not all of Chapter 1. I wasn't what song I should use to make her sing, but, apparently so I came across the BoA song. Hehe, brings back memories, since this song was played during my birthday party. I am making two parts to this, one to state where Hitomi's background is, sort of, and the second part, well you have find out and read. Otherwise, I hope you enjoyed. Currently, part 2 of the chapter is being in complete so expect this chapter to come in this week and the second chapter hopefully this week too. Please review! Until next time, ja ne! ^_^
~*Kuti…