** A/N Thank you once again to Lonely Alys, I'm trying to make this story
very angsty, to show the darker side of a relationship almost. I'm glad you
enjoyed the last chapter and I hope you enjoy this one as well-Kiera**
Faith's cheeks where wet with tears, but after a long time her sobs had finally subsided. It hurt on the inside. She could feel a horrible dull ache in her chest, the feeling she'd only remembered once before, heartbreak. Her heart was breaking, it had been too much. She wished her desperate cries had woken Jeff and that he would hold her in his arms and tell her everything would be alright. He didn't, and Faith knew it wouldn't. Everything was going to be different. She had to make decisions she really didn't want to make. But there was no way around it, and she had tried. Faith used to sleeve of her pyjama's to dry her cheeks. Everything had changed. The sob escaped from her throat before she even had the chance to contemplate what was going on and the tears started up.
"Stop it." she mentally warned herself. "Stop crying Faith. Right now, stop it."
She couldn't. In a vain attempt she clamped her hand over her mouth, it dulled the sound. Behind her, Jeff moved slightly, more towards the wall and she knew he was awake. Faith cried harder. She knew what she had to do.
// I never want to play the games that people play I never want to hear the things they gotta say I've found everything I need I never wanted anymore that I can see I only want to believe //
When Faith turned up at Jeff's that night she didn't bring a bag for the forth time in a row, she wasn't staying the night. For the few seconds she stood there she was the same person she'd always been. She wasn't the girl who cried at night and didn't sleep. She was just Faith and Jeff loved her. But now seeing her made his stomach knot up, he felt like it couldn't be good news, he could tell by the look in her eyes it wasn't. She didn't even have to say anything, it knew it already, he'd seen it all before. Faith was going to tell him she loved him but, but something and that it would be best if they ended it.
"Jeff...." she began.
"No. Don't." He pleaded with her, holding one of her shaking hands. "I know, but don't say it. "
Faith nodded, she wasn't looking at him, she couldn't. "I'm so sorry."
She didn't say anymore. She didn't try and explain, she couldn't so why bother. What she wanted was for Jeff to hate her, it would be easier. But he didn't, she knew that.
"I still love you, I thought you should know." he said quietly.
"I know. But it's not fair on you."
"What you mean is, it isn't fair on you, right?" Jeff asked.
"It's not like that, it really isn't. I just can't explain what it is like."
"Don't Fai, just, go."
So Faith did. She left. She walked out of the front door and out of Jeff's life. He felt a pull in his stomach, one that almost urged him to his feet and out the door. Right after her, to grab hold of Faith and convince her not to leave. To tell her how much she really did mean to him. He didn't, what good would it do. Faith had made her mind up. Jeff just stayed where he was, shut his eyes and refused to believe he'd lost her.
Faith's cheeks where wet with tears, but after a long time her sobs had finally subsided. It hurt on the inside. She could feel a horrible dull ache in her chest, the feeling she'd only remembered once before, heartbreak. Her heart was breaking, it had been too much. She wished her desperate cries had woken Jeff and that he would hold her in his arms and tell her everything would be alright. He didn't, and Faith knew it wouldn't. Everything was going to be different. She had to make decisions she really didn't want to make. But there was no way around it, and she had tried. Faith used to sleeve of her pyjama's to dry her cheeks. Everything had changed. The sob escaped from her throat before she even had the chance to contemplate what was going on and the tears started up.
"Stop it." she mentally warned herself. "Stop crying Faith. Right now, stop it."
She couldn't. In a vain attempt she clamped her hand over her mouth, it dulled the sound. Behind her, Jeff moved slightly, more towards the wall and she knew he was awake. Faith cried harder. She knew what she had to do.
// I never want to play the games that people play I never want to hear the things they gotta say I've found everything I need I never wanted anymore that I can see I only want to believe //
When Faith turned up at Jeff's that night she didn't bring a bag for the forth time in a row, she wasn't staying the night. For the few seconds she stood there she was the same person she'd always been. She wasn't the girl who cried at night and didn't sleep. She was just Faith and Jeff loved her. But now seeing her made his stomach knot up, he felt like it couldn't be good news, he could tell by the look in her eyes it wasn't. She didn't even have to say anything, it knew it already, he'd seen it all before. Faith was going to tell him she loved him but, but something and that it would be best if they ended it.
"Jeff...." she began.
"No. Don't." He pleaded with her, holding one of her shaking hands. "I know, but don't say it. "
Faith nodded, she wasn't looking at him, she couldn't. "I'm so sorry."
She didn't say anymore. She didn't try and explain, she couldn't so why bother. What she wanted was for Jeff to hate her, it would be easier. But he didn't, she knew that.
"I still love you, I thought you should know." he said quietly.
"I know. But it's not fair on you."
"What you mean is, it isn't fair on you, right?" Jeff asked.
"It's not like that, it really isn't. I just can't explain what it is like."
"Don't Fai, just, go."
So Faith did. She left. She walked out of the front door and out of Jeff's life. He felt a pull in his stomach, one that almost urged him to his feet and out the door. Right after her, to grab hold of Faith and convince her not to leave. To tell her how much she really did mean to him. He didn't, what good would it do. Faith had made her mind up. Jeff just stayed where he was, shut his eyes and refused to believe he'd lost her.