Chapter 14- The Perfect Gift
*I'm going to tell her. I'm telling her today. No, shut up, I'm telling her.* Draco's thoughts were thus on the first day of Christmas break. He had debated for the entire week about whether to tell her. That morning, he had resolved that if he kept his feelings inside any longer, he would probably implode. Or explode. Neither was appealing to him.
*But the hard part will be telling her the whole thing.* He sighed. She would show up at any moment.
She was smiling when she entered the common room. "Feel up to wrestling today?" she joked. He smiled weakly, shaking his head. He was not sure he was even up to talking.
"Would you just- sit for a while?"
She sat, curiously eyeing him. Thankfully, she did not ask him any questions. He gathered his courage and told her the one thing he would never have told her before he got to know her.
"Hermione, I need to get this out. It's going to be hard, so please don't talk until I'm done. I'm not sure if I'll be able to do it even in complete silence."
Following his suggestion, she nodded. He let out his breath slowly. *Well, the hard part first,* he thought, rolling up his sleeve. He showed her the now healed cuts on his arm. She lowered her eyebrows in confusion.
*Here goes.* "Last February I started to have these strange pangs when I thought of you, or looked at you, or heard your name. I did not know what they were, I really was confused. Then one day in April, I woke up to find my arm bleeding. When I went to the bathroom and washed it off, I realized what had happened. In my sleep, I had started to cut a word into my skin. The word was your name. 'Hermione'. I was too embarrassed to go to Madame Pomfrey, but I knew then that I was in love with you."
"I've always liked you, Hermione. From the first day I saw you, I liked you. I had to act like I hated you, though. You were in Gryffindor, you were Muggle-born. My father would have killed me. So the more I liked you, the meaner I got. You must have noticed how I just got worse each year. I had to. I was trying to cover up my feelings. At the Yule Ball, I was angry only because I couldn't hate you that night. You were just so, so beautiful-"
"But you always are. I never cared that your hair was bushy, or that your teeth were not perfect. You were always beautiful to me, and you always will be. I'm so sorry for everything, I wish I could have gone back and switched my parents. Or, just my father. Then I might have been able to let you know sooner. I'm still not willing to let my father know about my feelings…"
"I understand if you don't feel the same, I've been horrible to you for five years. I don't expect anything from you, I just had to get my feelings out. I just need to ask you to think about it, please? And if you want, we can just stay just friends. I just couldn't hide it anymore. You have no idea what it's like."
He stopped pacing suddenly and looked at her. She was still staring at his arm. He realized that his sleeve was still pushed up to the elbow, and he hastily pulled it down again. With the barrier between her eyes and the scars, large tears began to form. When she looked into his eyes, they spilled over. She looked down again.
"Hermione-"
"I'm sorry," she whispered, and ran weeping from the Slytherin common room.
Draco threw himself onto the green leather couch, cursing himself for a fool. Of course she wouldn't feel the same way. *Idiot.* He rested his forehead on his hand and remained that way for a long time. He did not even brush away the solitary tear that dripped down his cheek.
"Draco?" a small voice said from the dormitory hallway.
"What, Sagittus." Sagittus Lottari was a second year with midnight black hair and deep blue eyes. He was very quiet, but after talking to him, Draco knew him to be quite confident and intelligent as well.
"I can help you get her back."
Draco's head snapped up. "You were listening, you little-"
"No, it's just really obvious. What else would you be depressed about, when that's all you ever talk about? You really do need some lessons in common sense."
Draco laughed mirthlessly. "I guess I do. Falling in love with Hermione Granger." They were both silent for a moment. "How am I going to win her over?"
"Christmas day."
Draco spent the next two days working on her gift, barely pausing to eat or sleep. "My masterpiece," he said when he had finished. "What do you think?"
"It needs a frame," Sagittus stated bluntly.
************************************************************************
Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to vanish inside your kiss
Every day I love you more and more
Listen to my heart can you hear it sing
Telling me to give you everything
Seasons may change, winter to spring
But I love you until the end of time
Come what may
Come what may
I will love you
Until my dying day
Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
It all revolves around you
And there's no mountain too high
Now river too wide
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
Storm clouds may gather and stars may collide
But I love you until the end of time
Come what may
Come what may
I will love you
Until my dying day
Oh come what may
Come what may
I will love you
Oh I will love you
Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Come what may
Come what may
I will love you
Until my dying day
The song echoed in Hermione's head as she made her way down to the dungeons. She knew the significance of the song Draco had chosen. She knew it was how he felt about her. She know knew her own feelings, and she could not ignore them either.
She backtracked five steps when she realized she had passed the hidden door. "Draco dormiens," she said quietly. The door began to slide open. She descended into the common room to find Draco sitting on a couch with a dark-haired boy.
The boy exchanged a pointed glance with Draco before sliding off the couch and disappearing into his dorm. "Who was that?" Hermione asked lamely.
"Sagittus Lottari," Draco replied. He did not look at her.
"Oh." She sat down with him, but he stood and began pacing immediately. "Draco, will you-"
"Hermione, I can't just be friends with you, not now that you know my feelings. I am always going to love you, and to know that you do not love me back is too painful. I know I said we can be just friends but I was just trying to take some of the pressure off and now you're probably thinking-"
Apparently, Draco had just abandoned breathing in favor of hysteria.
"Draco, listen to me." He stopped talking but continued to pace. "I do not know if I love you. It is too soon to tell. But I do like you." She glanced up at him. His steps had slowed. "As more than a friend." They slowed even more. "A lot." He stopped short directly in front of her.
"When I said I was sorry yesterday," she explained. "It was probably not clear. The thing I was sorry about was not that you loved me. I was sorry that your feelings for me caused you so much pain. I would never want to bring that upon you."
"I brought it upon myself." Draco shook his head. "I've always thought I was stupid for loving you."
"No," she protested. "I was stupid for not getting to know you. You have every right to your feelings. And…I want to be with you. The painting showed me what you thought of me, and I almost stopped breathing. The song, though…the song was beautiful. And I finally understood how you felt."
Draco smiled sheepishly. "You can thank Sagittus for that. His grandmother is a Muggle, so he knows these things. I just told him how I felt, and he found the appropriate song."
"Well, thank him for me," Hermione said, standing. "Because I loved it."
"I opened the ankh pendant you bought for me," Draco said. "Thank you. It was great. Well, it still is." He took it from underneath his black sweater.
"You're wearing it already. That's so sweet."
Draco took her hand. "I'm glad you like it."
She knew he meant his gift. He led her to the couch and they sat there, staring at each other, occasionally smiling with affection. Suddenly Hermione broke into a fit of giggles. "I'm sorry," she said when she recovered. "I can't help it."
"Well, you've got eleven more days to giggle in the Slytherin common room."
"I want us to be together, Draco," she sighed. "That's what I think."
He smiled widely. "Now *this* is the perfect gift."
"Draco, I-"
She had not known what she was about to say, and she never found out. Words were futile. They were muffled by Draco's lips on hers.
End Chapter 14
As usual thank you reviewers, I loves you! Confetti!
Song: 'Come What May' From the movie 'Moulin Rouge'. God I love Ewan McGregor.
Please review. This time reviewers get star and moon confetti on top of a brownie.
*I'm going to tell her. I'm telling her today. No, shut up, I'm telling her.* Draco's thoughts were thus on the first day of Christmas break. He had debated for the entire week about whether to tell her. That morning, he had resolved that if he kept his feelings inside any longer, he would probably implode. Or explode. Neither was appealing to him.
*But the hard part will be telling her the whole thing.* He sighed. She would show up at any moment.
She was smiling when she entered the common room. "Feel up to wrestling today?" she joked. He smiled weakly, shaking his head. He was not sure he was even up to talking.
"Would you just- sit for a while?"
She sat, curiously eyeing him. Thankfully, she did not ask him any questions. He gathered his courage and told her the one thing he would never have told her before he got to know her.
"Hermione, I need to get this out. It's going to be hard, so please don't talk until I'm done. I'm not sure if I'll be able to do it even in complete silence."
Following his suggestion, she nodded. He let out his breath slowly. *Well, the hard part first,* he thought, rolling up his sleeve. He showed her the now healed cuts on his arm. She lowered her eyebrows in confusion.
*Here goes.* "Last February I started to have these strange pangs when I thought of you, or looked at you, or heard your name. I did not know what they were, I really was confused. Then one day in April, I woke up to find my arm bleeding. When I went to the bathroom and washed it off, I realized what had happened. In my sleep, I had started to cut a word into my skin. The word was your name. 'Hermione'. I was too embarrassed to go to Madame Pomfrey, but I knew then that I was in love with you."
"I've always liked you, Hermione. From the first day I saw you, I liked you. I had to act like I hated you, though. You were in Gryffindor, you were Muggle-born. My father would have killed me. So the more I liked you, the meaner I got. You must have noticed how I just got worse each year. I had to. I was trying to cover up my feelings. At the Yule Ball, I was angry only because I couldn't hate you that night. You were just so, so beautiful-"
"But you always are. I never cared that your hair was bushy, or that your teeth were not perfect. You were always beautiful to me, and you always will be. I'm so sorry for everything, I wish I could have gone back and switched my parents. Or, just my father. Then I might have been able to let you know sooner. I'm still not willing to let my father know about my feelings…"
"I understand if you don't feel the same, I've been horrible to you for five years. I don't expect anything from you, I just had to get my feelings out. I just need to ask you to think about it, please? And if you want, we can just stay just friends. I just couldn't hide it anymore. You have no idea what it's like."
He stopped pacing suddenly and looked at her. She was still staring at his arm. He realized that his sleeve was still pushed up to the elbow, and he hastily pulled it down again. With the barrier between her eyes and the scars, large tears began to form. When she looked into his eyes, they spilled over. She looked down again.
"Hermione-"
"I'm sorry," she whispered, and ran weeping from the Slytherin common room.
Draco threw himself onto the green leather couch, cursing himself for a fool. Of course she wouldn't feel the same way. *Idiot.* He rested his forehead on his hand and remained that way for a long time. He did not even brush away the solitary tear that dripped down his cheek.
"Draco?" a small voice said from the dormitory hallway.
"What, Sagittus." Sagittus Lottari was a second year with midnight black hair and deep blue eyes. He was very quiet, but after talking to him, Draco knew him to be quite confident and intelligent as well.
"I can help you get her back."
Draco's head snapped up. "You were listening, you little-"
"No, it's just really obvious. What else would you be depressed about, when that's all you ever talk about? You really do need some lessons in common sense."
Draco laughed mirthlessly. "I guess I do. Falling in love with Hermione Granger." They were both silent for a moment. "How am I going to win her over?"
"Christmas day."
Draco spent the next two days working on her gift, barely pausing to eat or sleep. "My masterpiece," he said when he had finished. "What do you think?"
"It needs a frame," Sagittus stated bluntly.
************************************************************************
Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to vanish inside your kiss
Every day I love you more and more
Listen to my heart can you hear it sing
Telling me to give you everything
Seasons may change, winter to spring
But I love you until the end of time
Come what may
Come what may
I will love you
Until my dying day
Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
It all revolves around you
And there's no mountain too high
Now river too wide
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
Storm clouds may gather and stars may collide
But I love you until the end of time
Come what may
Come what may
I will love you
Until my dying day
Oh come what may
Come what may
I will love you
Oh I will love you
Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Come what may
Come what may
I will love you
Until my dying day
The song echoed in Hermione's head as she made her way down to the dungeons. She knew the significance of the song Draco had chosen. She knew it was how he felt about her. She know knew her own feelings, and she could not ignore them either.
She backtracked five steps when she realized she had passed the hidden door. "Draco dormiens," she said quietly. The door began to slide open. She descended into the common room to find Draco sitting on a couch with a dark-haired boy.
The boy exchanged a pointed glance with Draco before sliding off the couch and disappearing into his dorm. "Who was that?" Hermione asked lamely.
"Sagittus Lottari," Draco replied. He did not look at her.
"Oh." She sat down with him, but he stood and began pacing immediately. "Draco, will you-"
"Hermione, I can't just be friends with you, not now that you know my feelings. I am always going to love you, and to know that you do not love me back is too painful. I know I said we can be just friends but I was just trying to take some of the pressure off and now you're probably thinking-"
Apparently, Draco had just abandoned breathing in favor of hysteria.
"Draco, listen to me." He stopped talking but continued to pace. "I do not know if I love you. It is too soon to tell. But I do like you." She glanced up at him. His steps had slowed. "As more than a friend." They slowed even more. "A lot." He stopped short directly in front of her.
"When I said I was sorry yesterday," she explained. "It was probably not clear. The thing I was sorry about was not that you loved me. I was sorry that your feelings for me caused you so much pain. I would never want to bring that upon you."
"I brought it upon myself." Draco shook his head. "I've always thought I was stupid for loving you."
"No," she protested. "I was stupid for not getting to know you. You have every right to your feelings. And…I want to be with you. The painting showed me what you thought of me, and I almost stopped breathing. The song, though…the song was beautiful. And I finally understood how you felt."
Draco smiled sheepishly. "You can thank Sagittus for that. His grandmother is a Muggle, so he knows these things. I just told him how I felt, and he found the appropriate song."
"Well, thank him for me," Hermione said, standing. "Because I loved it."
"I opened the ankh pendant you bought for me," Draco said. "Thank you. It was great. Well, it still is." He took it from underneath his black sweater.
"You're wearing it already. That's so sweet."
Draco took her hand. "I'm glad you like it."
She knew he meant his gift. He led her to the couch and they sat there, staring at each other, occasionally smiling with affection. Suddenly Hermione broke into a fit of giggles. "I'm sorry," she said when she recovered. "I can't help it."
"Well, you've got eleven more days to giggle in the Slytherin common room."
"I want us to be together, Draco," she sighed. "That's what I think."
He smiled widely. "Now *this* is the perfect gift."
"Draco, I-"
She had not known what she was about to say, and she never found out. Words were futile. They were muffled by Draco's lips on hers.
End Chapter 14
As usual thank you reviewers, I loves you! Confetti!
Song: 'Come What May' From the movie 'Moulin Rouge'. God I love Ewan McGregor.
Please review. This time reviewers get star and moon confetti on top of a brownie.