Disclaimer: Neon Genesis Evangelion is the property of Gainax,
A.D.V Films, and other such people. I'm making no profit off this
work whatsoever, so let's put the lawyers away now. Thanks ever so
much.
Author's Notes: All comments, criticisms, and lengthy explanations as
to why I should have never have tried to write an Eva fic in the first
place are welcome. I can be reached at Doc7dmz@aol.com,
Asuka-chan@fanfix.zzn.com, or Asuka_rocks@naboomail.com.
Take your pick. Many, many thanks to Axel Terizaki and Misty Ikari
for sitting through and offering advice on the six some odd drafts of
this chapter. It's good to have people keeping you honest.
1) * . . . * shows thoughts.
2) . . . shows the other side of a telephone conversation.
He was sleeping. Yet for Shinji Ikari this act held no
respite, no rest. His body gave way to another tossing fit, twisting the
layer of flat white sheets further round his legs and forcing their edge
into a bunched and wrinkled mass that lay stomach high. His hospital gown,
the same pale hue as both the sheets and room itself, clung to his chest
through a thin sheen of perspiration, a visible signal of his agitation
and discomfort.
A small chair stood stiffly beside Shinji's bed, its occupant
holding a lengthy watch over the boy. Rei Ayanami had done this before,
had watched over Shinji as he recovered from injuries sustained during
their conflicts with the Angels. He had always seemed peaceful when in
bed, disseminating an aura of unaware comfort. Never before had she seen
him so . . . active while in the throes of sleep. It was curious.
Suffering another spasm, Shinji spun over, returning to his back
and feebly clutching at the surrounding covers. Rei stared intently as
his mouth worked, but the word he struggled to form refused to produce
itself. Finally, a thin and brittle voice worked its way to the surface.
"A. . . Asuka," Shinji pleaded. "Asuka." Rei blinked. Once. Then she
resumed her vigil.
"From all Corners they Cried"
An Evangelion Fan Fic
by Dave Ziegler
Part three: "Fallout/Two Days Hence"
Version 1.5
"Miss Sohryu? Miss Sohryu?" Asuka lay upon the bed and refused
to open her eyes. The nurse could call until her voice gave out or hell
froze over, Asuka didn't care which. She wasn't going to respond. What
would be the point? They were probably just after her for another round
of prodding and changing. Why they needed to stare at her wound in idle
contemplation every time someone removed the dressing on her shoulder was
a complete mystery to Asuka. Couldn't they just change the damn thing
and be done with it? There was no need to ogle her pain like a bunch of
torturous school children playing with a bug each and every time the door
opened.
The worst thing of it was that the doctors and nurses were the
only actual people who did come through the door. Kaji hadn't come to
visit her yet. Talk about self absorbed, ignoring her at a time like this.
Asuka couldn't believe she had actually. . . oh the bastard was probably off
somewhere jumping into a broom closet with Misato just to get his kicks.
He couldn't care less what happened to her. Asuka couldn't give him what
he wanted, and so she fell by the wayside, nothing more than a nagging
consideration.
And then there was Misato. To think Asuka had actually believed that
she would come to check on her. She had almost begun to buy into Misato's
little myth that she was more to her than just an Eva pilot. That she wasn't
a responsibility. Instead of acting upon and validating her words, Misato had
run right to hug, cry over, and hold her little Shinji; afterward, she never
returned. Asuka couldn't have asked for a sharper and more decisive kick in
the teeth to help steer her back to a clear view of reality.
"Miss Sohryu," the nurse continued to badger. "You do remember you
are going to be released later today? I need to give your shoulder one last
look before we return you to the custody of your guardian. So sit up slowly
please."
*Great,* she thought acidly. *Home. With Misato and that. . . and
that. . .* Asuka firmly shut away any further thoughts on the matter before
slowly pushing herself up off the bed.
* * *
Misato glanced at Asuka who was perched upon the passenger seat
and staring pointedly out of the window. The flickering streetlights flashed
across the girl as Misato sped by, displaying momentary glimpses of her face,
and revealing more to her guardian than Asuka would have desired.
"Asuka, are you sure you feel up to coming home? You look a little on
edge." On edge really wasn't the proper word to describe it. The second child
wasn't just nervous, she was absolutely riddled with tension. Her shoulders
were hunched and both her neck and face were stiff, as if they had been carved
from wood. Across her lap, Asuka's fingers danced a constant waltz with one
another, ducking and riding between each hand. She wasn't sure which, but it
seemed likely to Misato that Asuka would either explode or breakdown from
whatever she was wrestling with. While Misato could understand her struggle,
she also knew that neither eventuality was really preferable. Not at the
moment, and not with Shinji in the state he was. Misato needed one of them
to be strong. She was so close to the edge herself that she sought in one of
the children the reassurance to replenish her own demeanor.
Misato had always assumed it would be Asuka.
Damnit all, the girl was just shot. Who the hell was she to be sitting
there expecting Asuka to come back home, pride and arrogance in place and ready
to tackle the world after such an ordeal? She was the adult here and should not
be relying on the children to help her cope. It was her position to aid and
comfort them, not the other way around. She could be weak in her bedroom or not at
all. End of story.
"I'm fine Misato," Asuka mumbled unconvincingly. The car raced through
the deserted night for another few moments. The streets were black, bleak, and
bare, clutching an almost surreal abstinence from life. "Misato?"
"Yes," she answered, risking another glance at her charge.
"Where is Shinji? Wasn't he released today too?"
"Yes. Yes, he was. I picked him up earlier in the day and brought him home.
Ritsuko had finished all of her tests and he was in such a bad state. . . I just
thought getting Shinji back home as quickly as possible would the best thing for
him."
"Why didn't you collect me at the same time then?" Asuka quietly
questioned.
"You know how emotionally fragile Shinji is Asuka, and, well, the doctors
told me that they wanted to make one or two more checks on your shoulder before
they released you. Some precautionary ones to make completely sure that there was
no sign of an infection setting in."
"Oh," Asuka said, then muttered something silently to the window. Misato
was about to question the last the phrase when Asuka leant her head against the
seat and resumed silently staring outside. Well, whatever it was it could wait.
Misato did have something more important to ask her.
"Listen Asuka. I have some work that needs to be finished tonight, so
I'll be returning to NERV once we get you home. While I'm gone, I would like you
to watch out for Shinji. Try to make sure he stays optimistic and takes care of
himself, okay?" Then Misato smiled warmly at her charge. "Take care of yourself
also, Asuka."
"Yeah. Whatever you say," Asuka replied without turning.
* * *
Misato slammed her fists against the uncompromising keyboard of her
terminal. Since leaving Asuka at the apartment she had made her way back to
NERV to try and gather all the details of the attack on the children. She had yet
to be fully briefed on the situation as she had spent most of her time with Shinji
or listening to doctors' reports. Unfortunately, when she had visited Section-02
to speak with the secret service agents who had been shadowing Shinji and Asuka
that day she had been told that those individuals were unavailable, and that she
was to return to her duties and let them handle the details.
Rather pissed, in the absolute angriest sense of the word, Misato returned
to her office and decided to pull the files on the shooting. From them she could
attain the names of the agents involved, and then pull their own active duty files
so she might discover what was keeping them so indisposed. When she tried to
access it however, the database showed no records of any kind pertaining to a
shooting involving the second and third children and a rather large hole where
the duty roster for Alpha rotation should have been.
"Just what the hell is going on here!?" Misato snapped, glaring down at
her monitor.
"What's the matter sunshine?" Kaji strolled into Misato's office, hands
stuffed carelessly in his pockets and a half cocked grin on his face. "Something
troubling you?"
"Cut the crap Kaji." Kaji pointed to himself, radiating innocence.
Misato swung her glower from the computer to her new guest. "And you can haul
your smug ass right back out of here. I don't have the time to play around."
"I'm hurt Katsuragi. After all we've been through. I thought I'd come
and help you to ease your frustration. You know, a little song, a little dance,
a bit of a dally with my. . ."
"Don't even finish that sentence!" Misato barked.
"Not even once, Katsuragi?" Kaji grinned as he turned her radio on and
dialed up the volume.
"Can't you tell when your not wanted?"
"I beg to differ. I have something you want very much."
Misato cringed. "Listen, Kaji. I know we've been. . . doing things lately,
but we're not in college anymore. We can't just. . ."
"Section-02," Kaji quietly interjected. Misato sobered instantly and sank
back into her chair.
"I'm listening."
"The men you're looking for, those comprising the late Alpha rotation, are
no longer in Japan. They were transferred to the third branch in Germany yesterday."
"What? By why would they be. . ."
"Moved so suddenly?" Kaji interrupted. "That remains to be seen."
Misato's eyes narrowed as her mind conjured implications and scenarios.
"This doesn't feel right at all."
"No, it doesn't. And there's still even more to consider, Katsuragi.
Those men in Section-02 are professional killers. Does it stand to reason that
an average junior high school boy would be able to confront the children, draw his
weapon, and fire three shots before being eliminated?"
As Misato's face darkened, Kaji flipped off the radio, leaned over the
chair, and pulled her into a kiss. When he finally stepped away, Kaji wore a very
self satisfied grin and winked at Misato. "You're still the best ever, Katsuragi."
And then he stepped from her office.
* * *
Asuka lay on the couch, her legs curled behind her and head resting
upon a stray pillow. Her body trembled slightly every few moments, causing a
strange and twisted shadow to fall across the wall in the low glow of the
television set. Upon stepping into the apartment, Asuka's hand had flailed
lifelessly at the light switch until finally her fingers caught and struck the
lever, shutting her away from the influence of the fixtures and lamps. Somehow,
all that light and warmth just hadn't felt right at all. It was too. . . normal.
Once the room had been draped in evening's gown, Asuka had hauled herself
up onto the couch and flicked the television on. It had seemed as good a way
as any to momentarily forget about Misato, Kaji, the bandages, the sling:
everything.
However, the television held no sway over her; Asuka stared right through
the flickering images that inhabited the screen, and found her mind pushing back
toward those forbidden subjects. Misato. Misato had asked her to check on Shinji,
to watch over Shinji. But why the hell should she do anything Misato asked?
The woman had coned and toyed with her until Asuka slipped and found herself
believing in someone again. Misato had toyed with her, both here and back in Germany.
HER! ASUKA LANGLEY SOHRYU!
But Shinji.
Shut up. What about Shinji?
Shinji protected you.
Who the hell cares?! That baka is always trying to play the hero.
Everyone just loves the invincible Shinji. That's why he did it, no other
reason. None at all!
Are you sure?
Shut up!
For now.
* * *
Arms folded beneath her chin, Rei Ayanami laid upon her bed and
stared up and out a small square window. The moon was full and bright
tonight, its shine spilling into her apartment and washing over her
hair and face. The only discernible movement in the entire apartment
was the infrequent shifting of her eyes.
*I believe Ikari would enjoy this,* she thought. *It is. . . wrong that
he now be incapable of doing so.* Rei had remained with Shinji through
each and every night that he had been in the hospital, simply watching
him. Nothing else. The last night before his return to Major Katsuragi's
custody, he had said something in his sleep. Something that still puzzled
Rei. 'Asuka.' He had spoken the second child's name.
Why had he called for her? Was it because he desired her presence?
Ikari had been injured, did he go to the second child when this
occurred? Pain. Did she somehow avert his pain? Rei attempted to wrap her
mind around such a foreign and abstract concept. She was familiar with physical pain,
piloting Eva had made very sure of that. But Rei was also aware of something else
the others experienced, something that hide within her own being, just outside
of her grasp.
Perhaps if she truly understood this pain, she would be able to conclude
why Ikari had called for the second.
Yes, perhaps.
* * *
Asuka stood before the door to Shinji's room. Its white panes
were thin yet obtrusive, blocking her away from any revelation of what was
held within. Well, there wasn't much point standing around then. She would
just have to go in wouldn't she? There was nothing wrong with it after all,
she was simply performing a duty. Just like when she had carried the idiot
to the doctor's office after he had managed to concuss himself. Misato
could think whatever she wanted to, Asuka wasn't doing this as any
sort of favor. It was all about orders and duty. The military
obligation.
Her obligation.
She reached slowly forward, her hand coming to rest just centimeters
from the door's handle. *Come on, get on with it already. The way you're shaking
someone might actually think you were afraid to see him,* Asuka berated herself.
Sucking in a deep breath and finally forcing her hand to cease its infernal quivering,
she quickly grabbed the handle and eased the door along its track.
*There. That wasn't so hard, was it? Now, just take a quick look in
and make sure he hasn't done anything stupider than his norm. Yeah, that's
the ticket. A quick in and out. There's really no reason to hang around.*
Asuka stepped slowly into Shinji's room, intensely aware of the thick
and oppressive darkness that cloaked it. She shivered as it pressed inward,
a chilling reminder of something she couldn't quite lay a finger on but knew
and feared nonetheless. Suddenly the presence of light fixtures seemed an
unbelievable and intensely desirable boon, instead of a mocking reminder of
normality.
Groping slowly along the wall for the proper switch, Asuka's inching
fingers finally slid over a thick downcast nub. Entirely too pleased that
she had found the device, Asuka flipped the switch upwards and doused the
room in a flood of a hard white light. When her eyes had finally eased up
and readjusted, she instantly noticed that Shinji lay upon his bed staring
directly at her. Asuka choked, suddenly unable to think of anything to
say or do. He was supposed to be asleep or absorbed in that SDAT player
of his, not ready and waiting to pounce on her. It was just in and out,
in and out. No looks, conversation, any. . .
Wait. Shinji wasn't looking at her, it was like he was staring
through her. Asuka's temper began to flare. Just what the hell was he
doing? She had been kind enough to come and check on the idiot, the
least he could do was acknowledge her presence and thank her for her
trouble. But no, he was just going to lay there doing his best impression of
Wondergirl and completely disregard her presence. Asuka balled her available
fist, letting her ire take over and suffuse her mind with a reddish fugue.
"WAKE UP, BAKA!" she exploded.
"Asuka?" Shinji muttered feebly, inclining his head slightly in her
direction. "I didn't notice you come in. I'm sorry."
"What the hell do I look like to you? A pane of glass?"
Asuka watched with sudden horror as Shinji's placid features
twisted into a disturbed caricature of the boy she knew. "Actually, you
look like a great grey blob," he snickered. "Everything's a great grey blob."
"Just what is that supposed to. . ." Asuka began not willing to
pale simply because Shinji was acting strange, but quickly slapped a
hand over her mouth. Oh God, what was she doing? How could she have. . .
how could she have. . . Oh God, oh shit, oh God. She had forgotten.
FORGOTTEN! And then she had yelled. . . oh God.
Asuka eyes were wide and her mouth moved silently, struggling
for something, anything to say to repair what she had just done.
"Shinji. . . I didn't mean. . . just forgot. . ." Asuka's breathing
was becoming steadily more ragged as fear and pain tightened their
grip on her. "I'm. . . I'm sor. . . I'm sorr. . ." The words were
choked, desperately outside of her reach.
Unable to express anything, Asuka gave a brief shriek of
emotional frustration and quickly ran from the room. Shinji,
recognizing the rapid thumps of Asuka's departure, rolled
onto his back and brought his hand before his face. "Grey. Everything's
grey and black. Asuka. I can't even appreciate. . . You're there, but
not really. It only feels real if I picture you in my mind. And that's
just a lie, a fiction. It's not true. I've nothing left to hold on to.
It's all so worthless," he muttered. "Worthless."
* * *
Something harsh and buzzing invaded the sleep filled mind of Touji
Suzuhara. He desperately tried to ignore the sound, to preserve his
sleep, but it would not yield. Finally giving up, Touji rolled out of
bed and snatched up the offending phone.
"Yes," he snapped, thoroughly irritated after having been woken
up.
Touji! Kensuke Aida's voice roared through the phone. I
caught you. Great.
"Kensuke?" Touji mumbled, still trying to recover his wits. "Do
you realize how late it is? I was sleeping."
Of course I realize, but this is important.
He grimaced. "It better be, or I'm gonna pound you for all you're
worth tomorrow."
It's about Shinji and Asuka. Well, Shinji at least. I just
threw Asuka in for corroboration.
"They've been absent from school. I know that already, Kensuke,"
Touji replied grumpily.
They've been gone for three straight days. Rei's been missing
for the past two, Kensuke excitedly pointed out.
"Come on, Kensuke. You know more than I do about all that weird
testing NERV makes them go through. They're probably just training.
Besides, Rei's absent all the time anyway."
Aren't you the least bit concerned about Shinji, Touji?
"Well, yeah. But that doesn't mean I'm going to jump to
conclusions or wake my friends up in the middle of the night. If
you're so worried and can't wait, why don't you call Shinji and
talk to him?"
I tried, but no one answered the phone.
"Well, maybe their not home!"
This late at night? Kensuke suddenly paused, and Touji
swore he could fee his friend's eyes growing wide. Oh boy. Maybe
the government has kidnapped them, and are subjecting them to strange
and terrible experiments to discover what makes them capable of
synchronizing with their Eva's!
"Yeah, and maybe the red haired devil will ask you out on
a date. Listen Kensuke, I'm tired and I want to get back to bed. But
just so we can find out what's going on, and so you can leave me alone, if
Shinji's not in school tomorrow we'll stop by his place afterwards and
check on how he's doing. Okay?"
Fine, Kensuke said, unhappy that his theory was being paid such
little mind.
"Great. Good night."
Touji dropped the receiver back into its cradle and sighed in
exasperation before making his way back to bed.
* * *
The cone of light snapped to life, enveloping the slight form of Rei
Ayanami. She said nothing at first, but simply stood, awaiting recognition.
"You again," Asuka spat, her backed turned to the girl. "What do you
want? And why the hell is it so dark in here?"
"I have often wondered that myself," Rei said, stepping nearer to the
girl. "But as this place was not of my creation, I can do nothing but guess."
Asuka whirled on Rei, her face twisted and livid. "What do you mean?
You're the one who dragged me here, I know it! And only you seem to be able to
make that light, so you must know what's happening!" Asuka thundered, accenting
each word with an upturned fist.
"It is true, the light is my own. But this place is not." Rei raised a
slender finger and gestured toward Asuka. "You, pilot Sohryu, are responsible
for these surroundings."
"What the hell are you talking about? I can't even make that damned
light, so how could I be responsible for all this?"
Rei stood silent for a moment, contemplating her next words. "You are
not ready to create the light."
"Why not!?" Asuka fumed.
"I cannot say why."
"Ahh! You are seriously pissing me off, Wondergirl! I want some
answers."
Rei inclined her head, almost as if grateful for Asuka's demand. "Your
trial has begun, and you have not fared well so far, Sohryu. You escape and so
you fail. Reverse this course and yet you may prevail."
"You are hopeless! Misato's made more sense than that after nine beers!"
Asuka loomed over her fellow pilot, fists balling ever tighter. She still didn't
understand what was happening, why she kept finding herself in this atrocious
darkness, but Wondergirl there seemed to be grasping it all and not telling her.
The bitch was mocking her, throwing the fact of her superior station in this
environment in her face.
Asuka's eyes fell shut and her jaw clenched until it felt as if her teeth
would explode from the pressure. "I'LL KILL YOU!" she screamed and launched
herself forward, arms outstretched and ready to seize Rei's neck.
But Rei was already gone.
* * *
"Hello Shinji." The voice was soft, warm, inviting. A slow but
earnest mix of violins and cellos floated about, playing just beneath the
melody of the voice. For some reason he could not explain, Shinji Ikari felt
at ease. He slipped gently forward on his seat and attempted to identify
the person opposite him.
"Yes?" he asked, a slight smile showing his appreciation of the
surrounding concert.
"How do you feel?"
"How do I feel?" Shinji echoed. He was still unable to see past the
well placed shadows that concealed his companion. The violins and cellos began
to suddenly race, anticipation strumming an excited and tense symphony.
"Yes, Shinji. How do you feel? I'm concerned. After all, you just
lost your sight." The train car pitched into darkness, eliciting a yelp of
surprise from Shinji.
"What the hell is going on?" The voice smiled.
"You silly boy. You're blind."
"But. . . but. . ." The panic that flooded Shinji's mind kept him
from forming any coherent response.
"Hush. You need to think about something now, don't you Shinji?
How will you be of any further service to you father?"
"I don't care about him!"
"I didn't say you did. The question still applies."
"I don't want to think about that," Shinji whined.
"You must."
"Who are you? Why don't you leave me alone?"
"Because Shinji, you're father has used you long enough. I've
missed you. I want you to come back home. You need to realize it's
time to come back home."
Shinji felt something stir within him, a sudden and intense
realization and recognition. "Mother?" he gasped.
Crescendo.
* * *
Misato snapped a smart salute upon being led into the Commander's office.
"Commander Ikari. Commander Fuyutsuki," she formally stated to each in turn.
"Doctor Akagi," she nodded having finally noticed Ritsuko lurking in the shadows
near Ikari's desk. "May I ask what this is about Commander?"
Gendo Ikari sat at his desk, hands clasped firmly before his mouth, and
stared out at Misato through the red tint of his glasses. "You have been summoned
here Major because I have reached a decision regarding the third child."
"A decision? What do you mean?" Fuyutsuki stepped forward and into the
faint light of the office that surrounded Gendo's spartan desk.
"As you should know from Doctor Akagi's reports, Shinji is no longer a viable
Eva pilot due to his recently acquired condition. He is now incapable of acting
as the third child," Fuyutsuki explained.
"Therefore," Ikari continued, "Unit-01 will be reset for Rei, and the
Marduke Institute will be contacted in regards to finding the fourth as a replacement.
Shinji will be remanded to the custody of his previous guardian before the end of
the week."
Misato had continued to pale throughout the commanders' explanation,
fearing the direction in which it had been heading. But now that her suspicions
were confirmed, the fright fell prey to a rising fire. "What!? Shinji's a human
being, goddamnit! Not just some piece of machinery to be thrown away and replaced!"
"On the contrary Major, that is exactly what he is. A broken cog. If the
Angels are to fall and humanity to survive, I cannot allow any such faults to exist
within NERV."
"He's your son!" Misato lanced back.
"That is irrelevant. My decision has been made. You are dismissed Major
Katsuragi," Ikari calmly stated.
Misato's voice and demeanor seized into stone. "Yes sir," she forced out
before turning smartly on her heel and marching towards the door.
"Wait." Misato stopped as Ritsuko stepped toward Ikari's desk and beckoned
her back. "If I may Commander? she asked. "There is another option."
[End Part three]
A.D.V Films, and other such people. I'm making no profit off this
work whatsoever, so let's put the lawyers away now. Thanks ever so
much.
Author's Notes: All comments, criticisms, and lengthy explanations as
to why I should have never have tried to write an Eva fic in the first
place are welcome. I can be reached at Doc7dmz@aol.com,
Asuka-chan@fanfix.zzn.com, or Asuka_rocks@naboomail.com.
Take your pick. Many, many thanks to Axel Terizaki and Misty Ikari
for sitting through and offering advice on the six some odd drafts of
this chapter. It's good to have people keeping you honest.
1) * . . . * shows thoughts.
2) . . . shows the other side of a telephone conversation.
He was sleeping. Yet for Shinji Ikari this act held no
respite, no rest. His body gave way to another tossing fit, twisting the
layer of flat white sheets further round his legs and forcing their edge
into a bunched and wrinkled mass that lay stomach high. His hospital gown,
the same pale hue as both the sheets and room itself, clung to his chest
through a thin sheen of perspiration, a visible signal of his agitation
and discomfort.
A small chair stood stiffly beside Shinji's bed, its occupant
holding a lengthy watch over the boy. Rei Ayanami had done this before,
had watched over Shinji as he recovered from injuries sustained during
their conflicts with the Angels. He had always seemed peaceful when in
bed, disseminating an aura of unaware comfort. Never before had she seen
him so . . . active while in the throes of sleep. It was curious.
Suffering another spasm, Shinji spun over, returning to his back
and feebly clutching at the surrounding covers. Rei stared intently as
his mouth worked, but the word he struggled to form refused to produce
itself. Finally, a thin and brittle voice worked its way to the surface.
"A. . . Asuka," Shinji pleaded. "Asuka." Rei blinked. Once. Then she
resumed her vigil.
"From all Corners they Cried"
An Evangelion Fan Fic
by Dave Ziegler
Part three: "Fallout/Two Days Hence"
Version 1.5
"Miss Sohryu? Miss Sohryu?" Asuka lay upon the bed and refused
to open her eyes. The nurse could call until her voice gave out or hell
froze over, Asuka didn't care which. She wasn't going to respond. What
would be the point? They were probably just after her for another round
of prodding and changing. Why they needed to stare at her wound in idle
contemplation every time someone removed the dressing on her shoulder was
a complete mystery to Asuka. Couldn't they just change the damn thing
and be done with it? There was no need to ogle her pain like a bunch of
torturous school children playing with a bug each and every time the door
opened.
The worst thing of it was that the doctors and nurses were the
only actual people who did come through the door. Kaji hadn't come to
visit her yet. Talk about self absorbed, ignoring her at a time like this.
Asuka couldn't believe she had actually. . . oh the bastard was probably off
somewhere jumping into a broom closet with Misato just to get his kicks.
He couldn't care less what happened to her. Asuka couldn't give him what
he wanted, and so she fell by the wayside, nothing more than a nagging
consideration.
And then there was Misato. To think Asuka had actually believed that
she would come to check on her. She had almost begun to buy into Misato's
little myth that she was more to her than just an Eva pilot. That she wasn't
a responsibility. Instead of acting upon and validating her words, Misato had
run right to hug, cry over, and hold her little Shinji; afterward, she never
returned. Asuka couldn't have asked for a sharper and more decisive kick in
the teeth to help steer her back to a clear view of reality.
"Miss Sohryu," the nurse continued to badger. "You do remember you
are going to be released later today? I need to give your shoulder one last
look before we return you to the custody of your guardian. So sit up slowly
please."
*Great,* she thought acidly. *Home. With Misato and that. . . and
that. . .* Asuka firmly shut away any further thoughts on the matter before
slowly pushing herself up off the bed.
* * *
Misato glanced at Asuka who was perched upon the passenger seat
and staring pointedly out of the window. The flickering streetlights flashed
across the girl as Misato sped by, displaying momentary glimpses of her face,
and revealing more to her guardian than Asuka would have desired.
"Asuka, are you sure you feel up to coming home? You look a little on
edge." On edge really wasn't the proper word to describe it. The second child
wasn't just nervous, she was absolutely riddled with tension. Her shoulders
were hunched and both her neck and face were stiff, as if they had been carved
from wood. Across her lap, Asuka's fingers danced a constant waltz with one
another, ducking and riding between each hand. She wasn't sure which, but it
seemed likely to Misato that Asuka would either explode or breakdown from
whatever she was wrestling with. While Misato could understand her struggle,
she also knew that neither eventuality was really preferable. Not at the
moment, and not with Shinji in the state he was. Misato needed one of them
to be strong. She was so close to the edge herself that she sought in one of
the children the reassurance to replenish her own demeanor.
Misato had always assumed it would be Asuka.
Damnit all, the girl was just shot. Who the hell was she to be sitting
there expecting Asuka to come back home, pride and arrogance in place and ready
to tackle the world after such an ordeal? She was the adult here and should not
be relying on the children to help her cope. It was her position to aid and
comfort them, not the other way around. She could be weak in her bedroom or not at
all. End of story.
"I'm fine Misato," Asuka mumbled unconvincingly. The car raced through
the deserted night for another few moments. The streets were black, bleak, and
bare, clutching an almost surreal abstinence from life. "Misato?"
"Yes," she answered, risking another glance at her charge.
"Where is Shinji? Wasn't he released today too?"
"Yes. Yes, he was. I picked him up earlier in the day and brought him home.
Ritsuko had finished all of her tests and he was in such a bad state. . . I just
thought getting Shinji back home as quickly as possible would the best thing for
him."
"Why didn't you collect me at the same time then?" Asuka quietly
questioned.
"You know how emotionally fragile Shinji is Asuka, and, well, the doctors
told me that they wanted to make one or two more checks on your shoulder before
they released you. Some precautionary ones to make completely sure that there was
no sign of an infection setting in."
"Oh," Asuka said, then muttered something silently to the window. Misato
was about to question the last the phrase when Asuka leant her head against the
seat and resumed silently staring outside. Well, whatever it was it could wait.
Misato did have something more important to ask her.
"Listen Asuka. I have some work that needs to be finished tonight, so
I'll be returning to NERV once we get you home. While I'm gone, I would like you
to watch out for Shinji. Try to make sure he stays optimistic and takes care of
himself, okay?" Then Misato smiled warmly at her charge. "Take care of yourself
also, Asuka."
"Yeah. Whatever you say," Asuka replied without turning.
* * *
Misato slammed her fists against the uncompromising keyboard of her
terminal. Since leaving Asuka at the apartment she had made her way back to
NERV to try and gather all the details of the attack on the children. She had yet
to be fully briefed on the situation as she had spent most of her time with Shinji
or listening to doctors' reports. Unfortunately, when she had visited Section-02
to speak with the secret service agents who had been shadowing Shinji and Asuka
that day she had been told that those individuals were unavailable, and that she
was to return to her duties and let them handle the details.
Rather pissed, in the absolute angriest sense of the word, Misato returned
to her office and decided to pull the files on the shooting. From them she could
attain the names of the agents involved, and then pull their own active duty files
so she might discover what was keeping them so indisposed. When she tried to
access it however, the database showed no records of any kind pertaining to a
shooting involving the second and third children and a rather large hole where
the duty roster for Alpha rotation should have been.
"Just what the hell is going on here!?" Misato snapped, glaring down at
her monitor.
"What's the matter sunshine?" Kaji strolled into Misato's office, hands
stuffed carelessly in his pockets and a half cocked grin on his face. "Something
troubling you?"
"Cut the crap Kaji." Kaji pointed to himself, radiating innocence.
Misato swung her glower from the computer to her new guest. "And you can haul
your smug ass right back out of here. I don't have the time to play around."
"I'm hurt Katsuragi. After all we've been through. I thought I'd come
and help you to ease your frustration. You know, a little song, a little dance,
a bit of a dally with my. . ."
"Don't even finish that sentence!" Misato barked.
"Not even once, Katsuragi?" Kaji grinned as he turned her radio on and
dialed up the volume.
"Can't you tell when your not wanted?"
"I beg to differ. I have something you want very much."
Misato cringed. "Listen, Kaji. I know we've been. . . doing things lately,
but we're not in college anymore. We can't just. . ."
"Section-02," Kaji quietly interjected. Misato sobered instantly and sank
back into her chair.
"I'm listening."
"The men you're looking for, those comprising the late Alpha rotation, are
no longer in Japan. They were transferred to the third branch in Germany yesterday."
"What? By why would they be. . ."
"Moved so suddenly?" Kaji interrupted. "That remains to be seen."
Misato's eyes narrowed as her mind conjured implications and scenarios.
"This doesn't feel right at all."
"No, it doesn't. And there's still even more to consider, Katsuragi.
Those men in Section-02 are professional killers. Does it stand to reason that
an average junior high school boy would be able to confront the children, draw his
weapon, and fire three shots before being eliminated?"
As Misato's face darkened, Kaji flipped off the radio, leaned over the
chair, and pulled her into a kiss. When he finally stepped away, Kaji wore a very
self satisfied grin and winked at Misato. "You're still the best ever, Katsuragi."
And then he stepped from her office.
* * *
Asuka lay on the couch, her legs curled behind her and head resting
upon a stray pillow. Her body trembled slightly every few moments, causing a
strange and twisted shadow to fall across the wall in the low glow of the
television set. Upon stepping into the apartment, Asuka's hand had flailed
lifelessly at the light switch until finally her fingers caught and struck the
lever, shutting her away from the influence of the fixtures and lamps. Somehow,
all that light and warmth just hadn't felt right at all. It was too. . . normal.
Once the room had been draped in evening's gown, Asuka had hauled herself
up onto the couch and flicked the television on. It had seemed as good a way
as any to momentarily forget about Misato, Kaji, the bandages, the sling:
everything.
However, the television held no sway over her; Asuka stared right through
the flickering images that inhabited the screen, and found her mind pushing back
toward those forbidden subjects. Misato. Misato had asked her to check on Shinji,
to watch over Shinji. But why the hell should she do anything Misato asked?
The woman had coned and toyed with her until Asuka slipped and found herself
believing in someone again. Misato had toyed with her, both here and back in Germany.
HER! ASUKA LANGLEY SOHRYU!
But Shinji.
Shut up. What about Shinji?
Shinji protected you.
Who the hell cares?! That baka is always trying to play the hero.
Everyone just loves the invincible Shinji. That's why he did it, no other
reason. None at all!
Are you sure?
Shut up!
For now.
* * *
Arms folded beneath her chin, Rei Ayanami laid upon her bed and
stared up and out a small square window. The moon was full and bright
tonight, its shine spilling into her apartment and washing over her
hair and face. The only discernible movement in the entire apartment
was the infrequent shifting of her eyes.
*I believe Ikari would enjoy this,* she thought. *It is. . . wrong that
he now be incapable of doing so.* Rei had remained with Shinji through
each and every night that he had been in the hospital, simply watching
him. Nothing else. The last night before his return to Major Katsuragi's
custody, he had said something in his sleep. Something that still puzzled
Rei. 'Asuka.' He had spoken the second child's name.
Why had he called for her? Was it because he desired her presence?
Ikari had been injured, did he go to the second child when this
occurred? Pain. Did she somehow avert his pain? Rei attempted to wrap her
mind around such a foreign and abstract concept. She was familiar with physical pain,
piloting Eva had made very sure of that. But Rei was also aware of something else
the others experienced, something that hide within her own being, just outside
of her grasp.
Perhaps if she truly understood this pain, she would be able to conclude
why Ikari had called for the second.
Yes, perhaps.
* * *
Asuka stood before the door to Shinji's room. Its white panes
were thin yet obtrusive, blocking her away from any revelation of what was
held within. Well, there wasn't much point standing around then. She would
just have to go in wouldn't she? There was nothing wrong with it after all,
she was simply performing a duty. Just like when she had carried the idiot
to the doctor's office after he had managed to concuss himself. Misato
could think whatever she wanted to, Asuka wasn't doing this as any
sort of favor. It was all about orders and duty. The military
obligation.
Her obligation.
She reached slowly forward, her hand coming to rest just centimeters
from the door's handle. *Come on, get on with it already. The way you're shaking
someone might actually think you were afraid to see him,* Asuka berated herself.
Sucking in a deep breath and finally forcing her hand to cease its infernal quivering,
she quickly grabbed the handle and eased the door along its track.
*There. That wasn't so hard, was it? Now, just take a quick look in
and make sure he hasn't done anything stupider than his norm. Yeah, that's
the ticket. A quick in and out. There's really no reason to hang around.*
Asuka stepped slowly into Shinji's room, intensely aware of the thick
and oppressive darkness that cloaked it. She shivered as it pressed inward,
a chilling reminder of something she couldn't quite lay a finger on but knew
and feared nonetheless. Suddenly the presence of light fixtures seemed an
unbelievable and intensely desirable boon, instead of a mocking reminder of
normality.
Groping slowly along the wall for the proper switch, Asuka's inching
fingers finally slid over a thick downcast nub. Entirely too pleased that
she had found the device, Asuka flipped the switch upwards and doused the
room in a flood of a hard white light. When her eyes had finally eased up
and readjusted, she instantly noticed that Shinji lay upon his bed staring
directly at her. Asuka choked, suddenly unable to think of anything to
say or do. He was supposed to be asleep or absorbed in that SDAT player
of his, not ready and waiting to pounce on her. It was just in and out,
in and out. No looks, conversation, any. . .
Wait. Shinji wasn't looking at her, it was like he was staring
through her. Asuka's temper began to flare. Just what the hell was he
doing? She had been kind enough to come and check on the idiot, the
least he could do was acknowledge her presence and thank her for her
trouble. But no, he was just going to lay there doing his best impression of
Wondergirl and completely disregard her presence. Asuka balled her available
fist, letting her ire take over and suffuse her mind with a reddish fugue.
"WAKE UP, BAKA!" she exploded.
"Asuka?" Shinji muttered feebly, inclining his head slightly in her
direction. "I didn't notice you come in. I'm sorry."
"What the hell do I look like to you? A pane of glass?"
Asuka watched with sudden horror as Shinji's placid features
twisted into a disturbed caricature of the boy she knew. "Actually, you
look like a great grey blob," he snickered. "Everything's a great grey blob."
"Just what is that supposed to. . ." Asuka began not willing to
pale simply because Shinji was acting strange, but quickly slapped a
hand over her mouth. Oh God, what was she doing? How could she have. . .
how could she have. . . Oh God, oh shit, oh God. She had forgotten.
FORGOTTEN! And then she had yelled. . . oh God.
Asuka eyes were wide and her mouth moved silently, struggling
for something, anything to say to repair what she had just done.
"Shinji. . . I didn't mean. . . just forgot. . ." Asuka's breathing
was becoming steadily more ragged as fear and pain tightened their
grip on her. "I'm. . . I'm sor. . . I'm sorr. . ." The words were
choked, desperately outside of her reach.
Unable to express anything, Asuka gave a brief shriek of
emotional frustration and quickly ran from the room. Shinji,
recognizing the rapid thumps of Asuka's departure, rolled
onto his back and brought his hand before his face. "Grey. Everything's
grey and black. Asuka. I can't even appreciate. . . You're there, but
not really. It only feels real if I picture you in my mind. And that's
just a lie, a fiction. It's not true. I've nothing left to hold on to.
It's all so worthless," he muttered. "Worthless."
* * *
Something harsh and buzzing invaded the sleep filled mind of Touji
Suzuhara. He desperately tried to ignore the sound, to preserve his
sleep, but it would not yield. Finally giving up, Touji rolled out of
bed and snatched up the offending phone.
"Yes," he snapped, thoroughly irritated after having been woken
up.
Touji! Kensuke Aida's voice roared through the phone. I
caught you. Great.
"Kensuke?" Touji mumbled, still trying to recover his wits. "Do
you realize how late it is? I was sleeping."
Of course I realize, but this is important.
He grimaced. "It better be, or I'm gonna pound you for all you're
worth tomorrow."
It's about Shinji and Asuka. Well, Shinji at least. I just
threw Asuka in for corroboration.
"They've been absent from school. I know that already, Kensuke,"
Touji replied grumpily.
They've been gone for three straight days. Rei's been missing
for the past two, Kensuke excitedly pointed out.
"Come on, Kensuke. You know more than I do about all that weird
testing NERV makes them go through. They're probably just training.
Besides, Rei's absent all the time anyway."
Aren't you the least bit concerned about Shinji, Touji?
"Well, yeah. But that doesn't mean I'm going to jump to
conclusions or wake my friends up in the middle of the night. If
you're so worried and can't wait, why don't you call Shinji and
talk to him?"
I tried, but no one answered the phone.
"Well, maybe their not home!"
This late at night? Kensuke suddenly paused, and Touji
swore he could fee his friend's eyes growing wide. Oh boy. Maybe
the government has kidnapped them, and are subjecting them to strange
and terrible experiments to discover what makes them capable of
synchronizing with their Eva's!
"Yeah, and maybe the red haired devil will ask you out on
a date. Listen Kensuke, I'm tired and I want to get back to bed. But
just so we can find out what's going on, and so you can leave me alone, if
Shinji's not in school tomorrow we'll stop by his place afterwards and
check on how he's doing. Okay?"
Fine, Kensuke said, unhappy that his theory was being paid such
little mind.
"Great. Good night."
Touji dropped the receiver back into its cradle and sighed in
exasperation before making his way back to bed.
* * *
The cone of light snapped to life, enveloping the slight form of Rei
Ayanami. She said nothing at first, but simply stood, awaiting recognition.
"You again," Asuka spat, her backed turned to the girl. "What do you
want? And why the hell is it so dark in here?"
"I have often wondered that myself," Rei said, stepping nearer to the
girl. "But as this place was not of my creation, I can do nothing but guess."
Asuka whirled on Rei, her face twisted and livid. "What do you mean?
You're the one who dragged me here, I know it! And only you seem to be able to
make that light, so you must know what's happening!" Asuka thundered, accenting
each word with an upturned fist.
"It is true, the light is my own. But this place is not." Rei raised a
slender finger and gestured toward Asuka. "You, pilot Sohryu, are responsible
for these surroundings."
"What the hell are you talking about? I can't even make that damned
light, so how could I be responsible for all this?"
Rei stood silent for a moment, contemplating her next words. "You are
not ready to create the light."
"Why not!?" Asuka fumed.
"I cannot say why."
"Ahh! You are seriously pissing me off, Wondergirl! I want some
answers."
Rei inclined her head, almost as if grateful for Asuka's demand. "Your
trial has begun, and you have not fared well so far, Sohryu. You escape and so
you fail. Reverse this course and yet you may prevail."
"You are hopeless! Misato's made more sense than that after nine beers!"
Asuka loomed over her fellow pilot, fists balling ever tighter. She still didn't
understand what was happening, why she kept finding herself in this atrocious
darkness, but Wondergirl there seemed to be grasping it all and not telling her.
The bitch was mocking her, throwing the fact of her superior station in this
environment in her face.
Asuka's eyes fell shut and her jaw clenched until it felt as if her teeth
would explode from the pressure. "I'LL KILL YOU!" she screamed and launched
herself forward, arms outstretched and ready to seize Rei's neck.
But Rei was already gone.
* * *
"Hello Shinji." The voice was soft, warm, inviting. A slow but
earnest mix of violins and cellos floated about, playing just beneath the
melody of the voice. For some reason he could not explain, Shinji Ikari felt
at ease. He slipped gently forward on his seat and attempted to identify
the person opposite him.
"Yes?" he asked, a slight smile showing his appreciation of the
surrounding concert.
"How do you feel?"
"How do I feel?" Shinji echoed. He was still unable to see past the
well placed shadows that concealed his companion. The violins and cellos began
to suddenly race, anticipation strumming an excited and tense symphony.
"Yes, Shinji. How do you feel? I'm concerned. After all, you just
lost your sight." The train car pitched into darkness, eliciting a yelp of
surprise from Shinji.
"What the hell is going on?" The voice smiled.
"You silly boy. You're blind."
"But. . . but. . ." The panic that flooded Shinji's mind kept him
from forming any coherent response.
"Hush. You need to think about something now, don't you Shinji?
How will you be of any further service to you father?"
"I don't care about him!"
"I didn't say you did. The question still applies."
"I don't want to think about that," Shinji whined.
"You must."
"Who are you? Why don't you leave me alone?"
"Because Shinji, you're father has used you long enough. I've
missed you. I want you to come back home. You need to realize it's
time to come back home."
Shinji felt something stir within him, a sudden and intense
realization and recognition. "Mother?" he gasped.
Crescendo.
* * *
Misato snapped a smart salute upon being led into the Commander's office.
"Commander Ikari. Commander Fuyutsuki," she formally stated to each in turn.
"Doctor Akagi," she nodded having finally noticed Ritsuko lurking in the shadows
near Ikari's desk. "May I ask what this is about Commander?"
Gendo Ikari sat at his desk, hands clasped firmly before his mouth, and
stared out at Misato through the red tint of his glasses. "You have been summoned
here Major because I have reached a decision regarding the third child."
"A decision? What do you mean?" Fuyutsuki stepped forward and into the
faint light of the office that surrounded Gendo's spartan desk.
"As you should know from Doctor Akagi's reports, Shinji is no longer a viable
Eva pilot due to his recently acquired condition. He is now incapable of acting
as the third child," Fuyutsuki explained.
"Therefore," Ikari continued, "Unit-01 will be reset for Rei, and the
Marduke Institute will be contacted in regards to finding the fourth as a replacement.
Shinji will be remanded to the custody of his previous guardian before the end of
the week."
Misato had continued to pale throughout the commanders' explanation,
fearing the direction in which it had been heading. But now that her suspicions
were confirmed, the fright fell prey to a rising fire. "What!? Shinji's a human
being, goddamnit! Not just some piece of machinery to be thrown away and replaced!"
"On the contrary Major, that is exactly what he is. A broken cog. If the
Angels are to fall and humanity to survive, I cannot allow any such faults to exist
within NERV."
"He's your son!" Misato lanced back.
"That is irrelevant. My decision has been made. You are dismissed Major
Katsuragi," Ikari calmly stated.
Misato's voice and demeanor seized into stone. "Yes sir," she forced out
before turning smartly on her heel and marching towards the door.
"Wait." Misato stopped as Ritsuko stepped toward Ikari's desk and beckoned
her back. "If I may Commander? she asked. "There is another option."
[End Part three]