Disclaimer: Neon Genesis Evangelion is the property of Studio GAINAX, and the US
distribution rights belong to AD Vision. No profit is being made from this work,
so let's file all thoughts of lawsuits away. Thanks much.
Author's Notes: Hi there, folks. Anyone remember me, or this story? Just kidding.
Actually, I would like to dedicate this chapter to anyone and everyone who e-mailed
me over the past year inquiring about the status of Corners and its newest chapter.
If it weren't for your persistent and enthusiastic questions, I probably would never
have worked up the enthusiasm myself to sustain me through an all night writing
session to get the rough draft of this done. So, my many and sincere thanks. And
now, a year late, but two months earlier than originally thought, Part 4 of "From
all Corners they Cried." I hope you enjoy.
Oh yes, any and all comments and criticism are welcome. I can be contacted
at doc7dmz@aol.com, Asuka-chan@fanfix.zzn.com, or Asuka_rocks@naboomail.com. Take
your pick, I check them all.
1) * . . . . * shows thoughts.
One A.M. One A.M., and she was still at it, still sitting in front of
her console, typing away, entering line after line of code. Hyuga and Aoba had
long since left, and anyone else remaining on the bridge of NERV control was
obscured by the grand shadows that crept everywhere in its low lighting. What
was she doing here? If she kept at it any longer, she might never be able to type
again, much less participate in a further upgrade to the Magi systems. It was definitely
time for a break.
Lieutenant Maya Ibuki pushed her chair away from the slaving keyboard and
painfully stretched her fingers out, wincing each time a joint cracked. She could
type, enter data, no doubt about it, but the sheer volume necessary to perform an
upgrade and improve the Magi was staggering. Maya had been absolutely sure
that Dr. Akagi would have wanted to oversee the final stages of such an important
event herself, but had been equally stunned and astonished when her mentor had
delegated that duty to her. It was a test of sorts, she had said, to see if Maya
had really progressed in her abilities and understanding to the point where Ritsuko
thought she was. If so, it would be easily possible for Maya to find herself moving
on to bigger and better things within the organization. After all, it would be an
incredible shame if they were to waste a mind such as hers forever on the bridge.
Or so Dr. Akagi said.
At the thought of promotion, Maya found herself somewhat uncomfortable.
It wasn't that she minded taking on more responsibilities or greater challenges,
her current job was somewhat limited in that department, she just felt. . . .she
felt so used to being where she was. This had become her station. Yes, during
some of the off shifts and odd times, others sat here, but any time the Major or
either of the Commanders were on the bridge, she was here. Even as much she didn't
want to admit it, Maya had even become fond of both Hyuga and Aoba, despite their
seemingly odd and childish propensities.
Perhaps that was a problem. Perhaps she had become too comfortable here,
too prideful of the fact that whenever an emergency occurred she was moved in over
anyone and everyone else. Perhaps she should welcome these greater things that Dr.
Akagi had spoke of. Shouldn't she? Faint images of the Evangelions, the children,
and their stone cold commander flashed through her mind, reminding Maya of what
exactly advancement within NERV might mean for her.
Maya ground the heels of her palms into the dark spots beneath her eyes.
"I must be more tired than I thought. There's no reason for me to be getting
jittery." Glancing quickly at her watch, Maya noted that she had lost five minutes
to idle contemplation and dreams. Rolling her chair forward, she stretched her
fingers across the keyboard and flicked her eyes over the printout Dr. Akagi had
given her. There were about four hundred more lines of code to go. Right, time
to get this finished.
The Commander had deadlines, after all.
* * *
Rei followed the faint glimmer through the thick darkness, looking
entirely too much like a fascinated kitten stalking a stretch of twine. There
was light here. Light that was not her own. It was amazing, it was astounding. . . .
it was impossible. Unless. . . .
No, that couldn't be it. Could it? Sohryu could not have made such progress
since the last time she confronted her. Beside which, Rei had decided not to visit her
this morning. She had done so the previous day, and it had proved largely ineffective.
It would be better, perhaps, for her to let that day's events settle without any further
interruptions. It was true that her time was limited, but then nothing worthwhile had
ever been gained by rushing about blindly. A process such as this was delicate and
fragile, especially with a girl like Sohryu. One push too many and everything could
shatter forever.
And all her hopes would be lost.
There! She could see it now! It was a band, small and thin, almost
obsequious in its near invisibility. Rei thought her heart would soar at the
sight. At first, when she had initially noticed the glimmer, she had not been
sure it was actually there. Even while tracking it, it had seemed eminently
possible that it was just a figment of her imagination, a whim of fantasy to
give her hope. But now, now she could see it! It was there, casting a shadow
of light across the floor that distorted the darkness.
Trembling, Rei knelt in front of the black wall and ran her fingers
along its smooth surface. Her eyes were fixated by the light, and her small
finger tips fell into the rough crack that allowed the beauteous event inside.
She hungrily pressed her face against the wall, and moved her eyes along the
crack. There were greens, reds, blues, yellows! Everything that she had so
long been denied. It was all there, and so very, very close.
Rei fell away from the wall, and felt the corners of her mouth turn
instantly upwards. "There is hope, after all," she sighed.
"From all Corners they Cried"
An Evangelion Fanfic
by Dave Ziegler
Part four "Fallout/Three Days Hence"
Version 1.3
Beep. Beep. Beep.
Asuka stirred momentarily, then fell back into her pillows,
completely ignorant of the small buzzing clock that sat next to her bed.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
The clock chimed a little louder this time. Asuka emphatically flipped
her pillows on top of her head.
BEEP. BEEP. BEEP!
"Oh, for God's sake," Asuka muttered, climbing out of bed and harshly
swatting the off switch on her clock. "Why do I have to go back to school today,
anyway?" She moved toward her dresser and dimly searched through its stray
contents, before picking up her sling, arranging it around her neck, and gently
easing her injured arm into it.
Her shoulder was still raw and tender from where the bullet had entered,
and where the doctors had needed to operate to remove it. While she couldn't
make the arm move in many of the usual and appropriate directions, Asuka was sure
she wouldn't have any trouble recovering in the long run. Nothing as simple as
this would keep her down. She could endure the pain.
The sling was damn annoying, though.
While she could free her arm at night when sleeping, the NERV doctors had
ordered her to wear, when awake, a sling. The apparatus would help to keep her
arm immobilized, and therefore discourage it from making any sudden or awkward
movements that might endanger the healing process. It also served the function
of support, alleviating any of the normal pressure a free arm would apply to
said shoulder. Unfortunately for Asuka, the device left her feeling like an
invalid, as she was unused to doing anything with just one hand. Still, she
could survive. Asuka refused to let a lousy wad of fabric and plastic get the
better of her.
This was just another trial for her to face.
Trials. Asuka sighed heavily as she slipped out of her room. She had
had another of those nightmares last night, the ones with the angelically illuminated
Rei moving about a landscape of utter pitch. The first she had merely attributed to
shock from the attack, but now that it had happened again, she wasn't so sure. It
could still be the reason, she supposed. Being shot is not something you're likely
to get over in a few days.
Actually, it didn't really matter much what brought them on. Asuka just
wanted them to stop. They frightened her. The damn things actually frightened her!
Wondergirl was not her favorite of people to begin with, but to have the girl moving
about inside her dreams, talking of trials in riddles, it was too much. Especially
that landscape: Ayanami's realm, the never ending stretch of blackness. Asuka
couldn't stand it. She hated black. Things should be bright and bold, like red.
Terrible things hid in the dark, dire twists and fearful surprises. All should
be in the open, where she could see it, and where she could control it.
Struggling to put the dilemmas of the night behind her, Asuka slid her
door closed, then stepped toward Shinji's. She stopped just sort of grabbing
its handle, then thought better of it. Shinji was still in no shape to go
to school, and, after what she had said to him yesterday, it was probably not the
best of times to rouse him in her usual fashion, if to speak to him at all.
Gently rubbing her forehead, Asuka strained to figure out how life had
gotten so screwed up. She had been shot by a cowardly little boy, terminating
her status on the active roster of Eva pilots for a time (something she found
extremely irritating), and now she was feeling guilty about saying stuff to Shinji.
That idiot. Of all people, why would she have to go and feel sorry for bothering
him? It was totally undignified.
Then there was Misato. Not that Asuka expected much from her personally,
but the woman had always seemed to be extraordinarily devoted to Shinji. After the accident,
she would have thought that Misato would be running about the apartment almost
twenty-four hours a day, playing nursemaid to Shinji's every need as he recovered.
Instead, NERV's precious director of operations had dumped all of those duties
on Asuka, then disappeared the entire night. A quick glance toward Misato's room
told her that she had yet to even come back. Maybe Misato wasn't as concerned for
Shinji as Asuka originally thought?
"No," Asuka surmised. "Couldn't be. That woman would go to hell and back
for him. She's probably just learning to cope with it all. And more than likely
in Kaji's bed," she uttered, her voice laced with danger.
Just as Asuka was about to begin brooding on the topic of her one time and
current guardian, a very large and very deafening crash roused her fully, and
brought her running into the kitchen.
The room was an utter mess.
A white mountainous mass of rice lay spread across the countertops,
oddly contrasted by the equally large pile of coffee grinds that sat within a
relative distance of the brewer. A loaf of bread lay opened and discarded upon
the floor, the toaster sitting just above, mocking in its proximity. And near
the burning stove, amidst a pile of fallen pots and pans, sat Shinji, wearing the
most frustrated and angry expression Asuka had ever seen grace the boy's features.
"What the hell is going on here?" she demanded, not all happy about facing
the prospect of fixing the mess.
Pen-Pen, who stood just outside his refrigerator and watched the scene with
a slightly worried air, turned to Asuka and squawked with concern. Shinji, for his
part, crumpled at the sound of Asuka's voice and lost all of the fire and emotion
that had been evident in him only scant moments before.
"I couldn't sleep, Asuka," Shinji said, his voice quiet and strained. "I
needed something to do to get away from the nightmares."
"Oh, and let me guess," she sneered, "destroying the kitchen and scaring
Pen-Pen seemed the perfect solution for insomnia to you?"
"I was just sitting at the table," Shinji said, "thinking."
"Then what is all this?" Asuka threw her arms wide to encompass the
entirety of the kitchen. Shinji couldn't see her gesture, but it did not matter.
He already knew exactly what she was talking about, and the thought of this one
more lost ability nearly crushed his voice and spirit.
"It's my turn to make breakfast, isn't it? Besides, Asuka, you never like
to do it, even when you're supposed to. I thought it would be easier with your
shoulder, too," he managed.
Asuka pulled a step away from Shinji, gently running a hand along the sling.
"My shoulder?" she asked, this time finding her own voice subdued.
"Misato told me about it, when she brought me home from the infirmary."
Shinji's face remained placid and static. "You might as well help yourself, Asuka.
I can't do anything. You are right, too. I don't even know why I bothered trying.
I'm sorry." Shinji let his face sink into his knees.
The idiot, why had he tried to do this himself? Asuka knew she could have
handled it, one handed or not. Why did he have to go and feel sorry for her, like
she was in worse condition than he was. He couldn't possibly think that he was
more capable than she, that she needed coddling. This was just too far beyond his
normal levels of stupidity, it was. . . . it was. . . .it was something he had
done before. Even when they were both uninjured, he had moved to shield her in
any number of situations.
As if she needed any help from him.
"Get up," Asuka said. Her voice wavered for a moment, as if it wasn't
quite sure what tone to take, and awaited the victor of her silent battle.
Shinji, meanwhile, still cradled his head and made no move that showed he
was even acknowledging Asuka's presence, much less her demand.
"GET UP, IKARI!" Asuka thundered, the battle now over. "You are not
running away from this one, so get off your ass!"
Survival instincts kicking into gear, for he dared never ignore
Asuka when she adopted that tone, Shinji scrambled to his
feet and turned himself toward her explosive voice.
"All right, Third Child. We're going to have to do something about
all this. First off, I think you should turn off that stove before something
even worse happens in here."
"How?" Shinji's voice was suddenly laced with a mix of remorse, anger,
self pity, and apathy.
Asuka, though, wasn't about to let him indulge in any of it. "Are you
stupid? Turn the dial, of course!"
"That's easy for you to say, Asuka. You can still see the damn thing!"
Shinji exploded. "I can't! Or did you forget again?"
Asuka's mouth went dry. Shinji's words had struck something inside her,
and now it was blaring inside her head, clamoring for all the attention it could
gather from her.
'Guilty, guilty, guilty,' a voice sang inside her. 'It's all your fault,
and yet you forget. It's all your fault, and yet you push it away, down deep, like
it never really happened. You want clean hands don't you? You want to be able
to distance yourself from it all, pretend you're not involved. You can't though,
you are the center, the eye of the storm. You know you're guilty, guilty, guilty.'
No. Asuka would not let Shinji's words affect her like this. She would
not give in to the pressure.
Asuka quickly took the few steps that lay in between her and Shinji and
grabbed the boy by his shirt, pressing her face very close to his. "Listen to
me, Shinji. You are going to turn off that stove, you are going to clean up
this mess, and then you are going to make me a decent breakfast. You want to
know why, Third Child? Because you know this kitchen better than any of us,
and could have created a feast if I had blindfolded you just last week. So,
get off your lazy ass, Shinji. I am hungry!"
"Do you really think I can?"
"Ah! If you don't move it now, Ikari, I might just go find Misato,
and get her to cook us something."
"Right," Shinji said, taking a step back from Asuka as she released
him. "I can do this."
"That's the attitude, Shinji! Now, let's get going. You don't want
to press me when I'm really hungry," Asuka stated.
* * *
The door slowly swung open as Dr. Ritsuko Akagi made her way
into the office. She swept a quick hand through her blonde hair, and
produced a small shoulder bag bearing a large red cross on its side.
"Well," Misato asked, nodding her head in the direction of Ritsuko's
accessory.
"Everything I need is in here," the doctor replied evenly. "I'm
ready anytime you are."
Misato continued to fidget with a pen from her desk, her nerves
getting the better of her. Fighting Angels she could handle, this was
different. "You are sure this will work?" she asked, hoping her friend
would assuage her fears.
"I can't make you any guarantees, Misato. You should know that.
We can't be certain of a positive outcome."
Misato leapt to her feet. "Then why the hell are we even considering
this?"
"Would you prefer," Ritsuko began, still very calm in the face of her
friend's mounting anger and anxiety, "that we followed through with the Commander's
original plan, and simply send Shinji back to his previous guardian?"
"No," Misato replied, suitably subdued. "I wouldn't want that at all."
"Well, it seems your only choice is to let me proceed, then," Ritsuko
said, patting her bag. "Don't worry, Misato. I'm sure this will all work out.
Have some faith. After all, you are putting Shinji into the very capable
hands of science."
* * *
Asuka focused on the form of Shinji Ikari, as he moved methodically about
the kitchen. The rice, bread, and coffee no longer lay about in a haphazard
mess, but were neatly placed in a row upon the countertop. The pleasant smell of
fresh toast and butter slipped through the air and tickled her nose.
He was almost finished cooking.
For a moment, Asuka felt dread at that prospect. She was safe here, at the
opposite end of the room. But every time that Shinji strayed near her in his
endeavor, that tiny voice within her head found a megaphone, and promptly started
blaring its message.
Damnit all, she wasn't guilty of anything, though! The decision to act
was his, right? Asuka never had any influence upon it. Right? RIGHT?
"Ugh," Asuka groaned, pushing her face into her palms. Between this and the
nightmares, she would be certifiable within the week. Why couldn't it all just
go away, and leave her in peace?
"Asuka?" Shinji called. He walked carefully toward the table, tentatively
placing each foot in front of the other, almost as if he were worried the floor
might sink beneath him. In one arm he nestled the plate of toast, while the other
balanced a large bowl of steaming rice.
"Here," Asuka resignedly beckoned, "let me take the rice. Wouldn't want for
you to trip and have to start all over again, now would we?" She watched Shinji
scowl slightly at the comment, but he made no remark in return.
No, argument this time. No easy escape. Just a little peace, then?
Please?
* * *
There was a short click, then the door to the apartment slipped
open. Misato stepped quickly through, kicked off her pumps, and threw her
bomber jacket into a spare corner. Ritsuko, for her part, neatly removed
and stacked her own shoes, then followed the major into the living room.
"Just out of curiosity, Misato," Ritsuko ventured, "does Shinji ever have
any friends over to the apartment, or do your blatant displays of sloth and
laziness embarrass him too much?"
"Ha, ha," Misato muttered. "For your information, Ritsu, Shinji does
have friends over, and he isn't at all embarrassed by me."
"Are you sure he just doesn't mention it to avoid creating any sort
of problem?"
"Oh, just shut up, will you." Misato turned from Ritsuko, and cupped
her hands around her mouth. "I'M HOME!" she bellowed.
Ritsuko rolled her eyes. "Of course, how could you possibly
embarrass him?"
After receiving no immediate response, the pair made their way
to the kitchen, following the smell of a freshly cooked breakfast. Sitting
at the small table were both Shinji and Asuka, frozen in the act of eating.
"Well, well," Asuka commented darkly, her eyes cutting into Misato,
"look who finally decided to come home."
Misato matched the young girl's glare for a few moments, then backed
off in perplexity. "You're an hour late for your first day back at school,
Asuka. Don't you think you should get a move on?"
"Oh, Christ!" Asuka shouted. Her eyes flew from Misato to her watch.
Fleetingly gathering the information there, Asuka then sped from her chair
and out of the kitchen, a string a muttered curses and harsh words falling
in her wake.
Ritsuko smirked at the scene. "I can see what a positive influence
you are turning out be, Misato. Should you ever actually have children, remind
me to send them a sympathy card at birth."
A haze of red and green flew past the kitchen doorway yet again,
followed by a quickly discarded "See ya, Shinji."
"Bye, Asuka," the boy called back, startling both Misato and Ritsuko
momentarily. They had, in the moment, found themselves so intent on Asuka
that neither had really yet acknowledged the presence of the person they came
to see.
"Have a nice day, Asuka!" Misato threw in too, having waited long
enough for her own good-bye. The front door simply slammed shut.
"Well, now that that's over, might we get on with things, Misato?"
Ritsuko asked, turning toward Shinji. "Good morning, Shinji. How are you
feeling today?"
"Pretty good, I guess," Shinji managed around a further bite of toast.
Ritsuko waited for him to elaborate, but was disappointed. Well, perhaps
Misato might be able to coax something further out of him.
"Misato," Ritsuko began, then stopped. The woman was standing frozen,
eyes locked on the doorway of the kitchen. The expression that played with
her face was one of puzzlement and subdued anger. "Misato," Ritsuko called
again.
"Huh? What?" Misato spun toward Ritsuko. "Did you say something?"
"Can we get this moving, please?"
"Sure thing, Ritsu." Misato plopped herself down in Asuka's
discarded spot, and took a healthy bite of rice. "Morning, Shinji,"
she enthused around the rice. "Wow, this is good. Nice of Asuka to make
you breakfast, wasn't it?"
"I made breakfast today," Shinji corrected her.
Misato choked on her rice.
"You made all this?" she queried in disbelief. Her eyes took in
the large bowl of fresh rice, the platter of toast and butter, and the pot
of boiling coffee, all ready for consumption. "With Asuka's help, right?"
Shinji shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "She did help at first,
actually. Asuka kind of got me motivated by yelling. But I did make it all
myself."
"She yelled...." Misato began angrily, rising from her chair. Ritsuko,
fortunately, interrupted her.
"I see, Shinji. Asuka helped you to remember that you do most of the
chores around here anyway, and by virtue of that fact, should know the layout
of the all the necessities quite well."
Shinji merely nodded his affirmation.
"Well," Ritsuko approved, "she can put that mind of hers to use
when she's so inclined. Now, Shinji, Misato and I have something very
important we need to discuss with you. Do you understand?"
"Okay," Shinji agreed, not at all sure he liked the sound of
'important'.
"As we discussed before, your current condition is a result of
the damage done to your optic nerve by the gunshot wound you received to
the head. Now, what you may or may not be aware of is the fact that the
nerve was not completely severed, and so the brain is still receiving bits
of the information gathered by your eyes."
"Is that why when I move toward the sound of your voice, I can see
a kind of tall grey blob?"
"Basically, yes. I won't bother to go into many of the specifics,
but the fact that your nerve was not completely destroyed is a very critical
point. Because we have live tissue to work with, it may be possible, with
the use of a still experimental drug, to stimulate a regrowth and regeneration
of your optic nerve."
"What that means," Misato chimed in, "is that we may be able to fix
what's broken, and get you your vision back."
"That's great!" Shinji enthused, allowing himself to show signs of
hope and excitement. He suddenly felt like jumping out of his chair and
dancing around the kitchen. If Doctor Akagi could fix this, then he would
be able to pilot Eva again. Heck, he would be able to do the laundry, cook
like he used too, watch the moon, or even a slow sunrise. He would simply be
able to do again!
"There are some things we should warn you about, though, Shinji,"
Ritsuko stated, eviscerating his happy mood with a clinical incision. "The
drug we plan to use, Rhoxtenphelin, is new and experimental. It has yet to
be tested upon the human physiognomy, but it has exhibited great success among
tests with different animal subjects. It is just a matter of tweaking certain
bits of the drug to suit the desired species. Because of the untested nature
of it, though, there may be a possibility for unforeseen and dangerous side
effects."
"We need to know whether or not you think it is worth the risk, Shinji,"
Misato told him. "We need to know whether you want to try this."
Both women waited while the young boy sat upon his chair, eyes closed
in concentration. It was not, despite his earlier jubilation at the prospect,
an easy decision to make. After all, as Ritsuko had said, there could be any
number of side effects from this drug, some possibly even dangerous. Was his
sight worth risking his life over? But then how much of a life could he live
without it? He could not pilot Eva, which meant that he was of no use to any
one here. And he wanted to stay.
Shinji wanted to stay right where he was.
"I want it. I want to try this," Shinji stated lifting his head.
"Good." Ritsuko slipped the bag from her shoulder and placed it on
the table next to the rice. "I have the first injection right here, Shinji.
So, we'll start now. After this, you should receive about one every week.
I suspect we should start to see some signs of its effects within the first
two weeks. Then after reviewing the results, we will proceed from there."
"I understand," Shinji affirmed, and prepared himself for the bite of
the needle.
* * *
"Idiot, idiot, idiot," Asuka muttered to herself. "Why did I have
to spend so much time dealing with that idiot."
The school's lunchroom was a very crowded affair. Usually, each and
every table was packed with friends and students taking the one respite they
could enjoy in a day full of academics and pressures. Today, however, every
table toward the room's far corner lay intentionally abandoned, left to a
brooding and generally unhappy Asuka. It had long since become common knowledge
among the student body that steering clear of the girl on one of her good days
was an idea wisely adopted. Crossing her on a bad day was something best not
thought about.
And so Asuka sat alone, one arm folded atop the chipped formica table,
and her head a layer after that. "If he hadn't been distracting me so much I
wouldn't have forgotten my lunch, damnit! And I'm hungry. Breakfast wasn't
nearly that good," Asuka grumbled.
"Thinking about, Shinji," a polite and happy voice inquired. Hikari
Horaki promptly sat down next to Asuka, blatantly defying the school's unspoken
code.
"Hi, Hikari," Asuka managed. "And, no, I was not 'thinking' about
him. I was simply contemplating the various ways I can inflict pain and
suffering upon him for, first, making me late and humiliating me in front
of the class, and, two, for making me forget my lunch."
"You can have some of mine, if you like, Asuka." Hikari pushed her
lunch box between her and her friend. As Asuka rose to greedily grab the
spare set of chopsticks that Hikari was holding out to her, she noticed that
her friend was looking straight ahead at the wall. Asuka frowned as she
followed Hikari's nervous eyes, and found them constantly glancing from
her sling back to the wall. *She couldn't possibly be that conscious of
social niceties, could she?* Asuka thought, shaking her head.
"It happened during an exercise," Asuka stated, startling Hikari
into looking at her.
"What happened?" the pigtailed girl asked.
"My arm," Asuka asserted, gesturing with her chin in the direction
of the offending limb. "My shoulder, actually. I was injured during a
practice sortie with our Eva's. The entire mess was baka Shinji's fault,
anyway."
"Was it? How did he.... I mean how did the accident happen?"
"Well," Asuka began, "I'm not allowed to go into specifics or anything
with unauthorized personal, but let's just say it was all due to another of
his typical examples of clumsy piloting."
"Oh," Hikari managed, trying to reconcile the story with her knowledge
and image of Shinji.
"Don't worry about it, Hikari. I'll be good as new in a few weeks.
And, besides, Shinji got hurt in the accident too. A lot worse than me,
actually, so I'm revenged."
"Asuka! That's horrible!" Hikari berated her, straightening right
up in her chair. "You should never be happy because of someone else's pain."
"What? Why not?" Asuka demanded, dropping her chopsticks. "I'm stuck
being the living impaired for a month all because he can't control himself."
"It's not something you should do, Asuka. It is a disgusting, evil
trait."
"Well, live with it, or move somewhere else. I have every right to
be angry with Shinji."
Hikari backed her chair away from the redhead, wary of the blaze that
her eyes held. For a moment, she looked as though she would actually get up
and follow Asuka's advice, but then Hikari steeled herself and settled back
into her chair. "No, I think I'll stay, Asuka. After all, you're going to
need my help to get rid of this anger. Accidents happen, we just need to
learn to accept them and move on. Brooding over the consequences won't
accomplish anything." Hikari smiled confidently at Asuka. "You'll see
it my way, eventually, I'm sure."
"I wouldn't bank on it," Asuka grumbled, then took a swift bite of food.
* * *
"Mr. Aramaki!"
Kaji rose from the small chair next to the pretty young
secretary's desk where he had been waiting for the last twenty minutes,
and nodded his acknowledgment of the man who now stood before him.
Masaki Ikeda was a short fellow by all standards, round of the face
and stomach, but possessed of very keen and knowledgeable eyes. His
black suit was sharp and pressed, and the red tie that hung at his neck
was not a centimeter out of place.
"Had I but been informed of your arrival earlier, Mr. Aramaki, I
could have arranged for a suitable workspace for you."
Kaji waved off the man's worries with a warm smile. "Not at all,
Mr. Ikeda. The Board of Education doesn't want to put any additional stress
on you and your staff. I'm here to help, not burden you. All that I
require is a spare computer terminal from which to review the child's records."
Ikeda nodded, and waved for Kaji to follow him through the office.
"I am very pleased that the board gave us such a prompt response. This
child is beginning to worry me. She comes across very unstable, to the point
where even her teacher's are beginning to worry."
"Unstable in what sense, sir?" Kaji asked. One hand moved to adjust
his own tie, while the other lay inside his jacket pocket, quietly fingering
the description that he had acquired of the boy who attacked both Shinji and
Asuka.
"Emotionally. Now, normally I or my staff can handle such problems.
We are all trained to the utmost, and are very knowledgeable about the stresses
that children can undergo, especially living in the time we do. But this one is
different. This child's situation is unique, and I don't know exactly how we
should handle it."
"Hence your request for a specialist," Kaji smiled.
"Exactly," Ikeda conceded. "I only hope that you can find out what
the root of the girl's problem's are, and help the child." Ikeda continued to
walk for another few paces before stopping in front of an open door. "Here we
are. This is Mr. Hino's office, but he is currently on a leave of absence. So,
it is yours for however long you need it."
Ikeda walked into the small room, Kaji following a step behind. "The
computer terminal is on the desk, and online. And should you need anything else
to help you in your work, please do contact me." Mr. Ikeda moved to leave, but
then stopped. "Oh yes, and before you decide to talk to the girl, do please
update me of your plans. I would much appreciate it."
"You can be sure I will, Mr. Ikeda," Kaji assured the man, while taking
his place behind the desk.
"Good, good."
"Ah, Mr. Ikeda," Kaji began, stalling the shorter man from making his
exit. "There is just one thing before you go. I need to know the name of the
student you wish me to help."
"Oh, yes. Of course. Her name is Sohryu. Asuka Langley Sohryu.
She is a transfer student from Germany, and one of those Evangelion pilots.
That's one of the reasons that I believed we couldn't begin to meet her
needs in terms of counseling. But neither could I ignore the fact that she
consistently creates an aggressive and hostile atmosphere around her, one
that has bothered both students and teachers. It is not good for her, her
fellow students, or this school. I leave the situation in your capable
hands, Mr. Aramaki."
Kaji frowned, then folded his hands in front of his face. "Don't
worry yourself, Mr. Ikeda. I think I can be of great value and effect
here."
"I'm very relieved to hear that. Well, I will let you get to work
reading her file. Until later then, Mr. Aramaki." Ikeda turned and left
the small office, closing the door behind him. Kaji, for his part, shook
off the disturbing revelation he had just encountered, and filed it away
for future action. He had a purpose in coming here, and it was time to
get down to business.
Spinning his chair toward the computer terminal, Kaji grabbed ahold
of the keyboard with one hand, and brought the piece of folded paper from
his pocket with the other. He quickly spread it on his desk, reread it
to check the mental image of the boy he had compiled, then went to work
bringing up student files and photographs.
* * *
Rei Ayanami stood within the small copse of trees just outside
of the school yard, cloaked in a shade of browns and greens. If anyone
had actually concentrated upon the grove, they might have noticed two
deep points of red staring intensely out of the blackness, following
their movements with unequivocal precision. But as it was, Rei's subjects
were completely unaware of both herself and the trees.
"So, she wouldn't tell you anything about what happened?" Toji
Suzuhara complained, thrusting his hands into the air. "Typical of the
Red Devil." Rei was familiar with this boy. He was a classmate of both
hers and Ikari's, yet something more to Shinji. He spent much of his time
with this boy, very similar to the amount she spent with the Commander when
inside the Geofront.
"No, she wouldn't specify, Suzuhara. Asuka just said that there was
an accident while training, and that it was Shinji's fault somehow. She
said that he did something clumsy. And don't call her Red Devil." Hikari
Horaki, the class representative. Two brown pigtails, a matching set of
eyes, freckles, hidden strength, something of an extrovert: Rei's mind
flashed through all the information she had catalogued about the girl since
they first came into contact.
"Aw, come on, Hikari. Both me and Toji have seen Shinji fight in his
Evangelion. He may not like it, but he is good at it. Can you see him
screwing up because of clumsiness?" Kensuke Aida, another of Ikari's associates.
Somewhat more reserved than the other two, this boy spent less time around
others, Rei noted, and more time working with his computer.
"Yeah," Toji added. "I bet you she's the one who screwed up, and is
just trying to pass off the blame to save face while Shinji's not here to
give the whole story."
"Suzuhara!" Hikari exclaimed. "Stop that. I do not know what really
happened any more than you, but indulging in scandal won't help. If anything,
we should go to the Major's apartment, and see both of them ourselves. They
are hurt, you know, and that means that they could use some cheering up from
their closest friends, right?"
They meant to go to Ikari and Sohryu. Would that be permissible in the
Commander's eyes? If they were allowed inside, then the fabrication that was
created to cover up the truth about the attack would be destroyed. The
disruption caused by such a revelation could cause problems for the Commander's
work. "That course of action cannot be permitted," Rei stated, stepping from
the trees. "Both Ikari and Pilot Sohryu are not allowed visitors at this
time."
"Rei!" Toji gasped in surprise.
"Ayanami," Hikari stuttered, "were you eavesdropping on us?"
Rei felt her cheeks tinge slightly with color, and she looked quickly
toward the ground. Suddenly she felt uncomfortable, but still, she could
not let that stop her. "I apologize. But you must not go to Major Katsuragi's
apartment."
"Why not?" Kensuke demanded of her, peering through his somewhat thick
glasses. Fantasies about espionage and conspiracy danced in his mind as he
considered what Rei, of all people, might be doing eavesdropping on them.
"Ikari's injury requires a great deal of attention," Rei stated. "His
care must not be interrupted."
"Is it that serious?" Hikari wanted to know, her hands bunching together
at her chest in worry.
"Yes." Rei intently watched their three faces as they twisted into frowns
and other troubled expressions. "Ikari's situation distresses you? Are you in
pain?" she ventured.
"Well, of course, we're in pain!" Toji spat. "Our good friend is hurt,
you're telling us that it is a serious injury, and that we can't even see him!"
Rei stared blankly at them for a moment, pondering Toji's response. Finally,
she asked, "You say you are in pain, yet I can see no injuries on any of
you. How is that?"
Toji's mouth worked silently for a moment, trying to find some response
to the blue haired girl's question. Kensuke, for his part, simply remained
silent, observing the exchange with a keen and practiced air. It was finally
Hikari who took a step forward, then placed her hands on Rei's shoulders.
"The reason you can't see our injuries, Rei, is because they are blows
to the heart."
Rei stared blankly back at the class rep, one delicate hand tracing an
area of her chest.
"No," Hikari shook her head, smiling. "It's not our actual hearts that
have been injured, Rei, but our spirits."
The word spirit thundered throughout Rei's mind. Was this how pain
operated? Was this why she could not understand what the others were
experiencing? Because she was less than they, lacking a soul, or spirit
as Horaki called it. Was she deficient in comparison to these three other
children, being only a mere creation? Was she condemned for it?
"I do not think I understand," Rei said, bringing her eyes to meet
Hikari's.
"That's all right," the class rep assured her. "You will."
* * *
The lights in the Katsuragi apartment had all long since fallen
silent. Night stalked the outdoors, and no life stirred within the
confines of this building's walls. Misato had managed to make it
home tonight, unable to come up with a viable excuse to be out all
night two times in a row. She decided it would be easier to try and
track down some more information regarding the Section 2 operatives
tomorrow during her regular hours.
Aside from all that, she had been worried about Asuka. She had
come home in something of a gargantuan huff, which had only intensified
when she first laid eyes on Misato. Asuka had immediately thrown
herself into her room and refused to talk to either of her roommates.
Dinner had come and gone without her venturing out.
Misato had struggled vainly to get Asuka to leave her self
assigned prison, and talk about what was bothering her. Not a single
plea had worked.
Now Misato dozed in bed, fighting for a comfortable sleep. She
wanted to dream happy dreams. She wanted to dream of a time and place
where she jovially shared an apartment with both Shinji and Asuka.
* * *
Asuka awoke to find herself trapped in an ever present stretch
of darkness. Scrambling into a crouch, she took note of the shadows
upon shadows that seemed to grow from every crevice, and tried to
locate the tormentor she knew must be lurking somewhere near. After
all, she had not yet been in this place once without Ayanami showing
up.
And Asuka wasn't to be disappointed.
Rei came storming from the thick darkness, an intense fire
leaking from her eyes. She strode toward Asuka and grabbed the
girl by the front of her blouse. "You...." Rei struggled and frothed.
"You...." Unable to articulate her feelings, Rei simply let out an
unearthly roar of frustration, then began to drag Asuka through the
pitch environment.
"Hey!" Asuka roared. "What the hell do you think you're doing?
Let go of me this instant, Wondergirl!" She began to claw at Rei's
hands, but the other girl's iron grip never wavered. Increasingly
incensed that she could not break free, Asuka tried the only thing she
could think of. Bullying.
"Listen up, I'm giving you a chance to regain your senses here,
Wondergirl, before I do something that might permanently damage you.
And we know that no one wants the Commander's precious doll to get
broken, don't we?"
"Shut up," Rei commanded, then tightened her grip on Asuka.
Asuka's eyes grew wide in shock and anger. How could Rei talk
to her like that! She never said two words to anyone, much less
aggressively defended herself. And that tone, she had trouble
believing that it had left Ayanami's mouth. What the hell was going
on?
Before Asuka was able to voice any of her displeasure, though,
she found herself abruptly thrown forward. She skidded for a scant
few moments, then came to a dead stop as her back butted against something
solid.
"Ow!" she complained. "Damnit, that hurt!" Asuka untangled herself,
and quickly prepared to strike back at the albino bitch, but then stopped
short. She felt something warm on her shoulder, a presence that seemed
distinctly alien in a place such as this. Turning around, she found a
small stream of light shining upon herself, cutting through the darkness
and warming her now seemingly freezing body.
"Look at it," Rei told her. "Feel it. Did you know that it was
twice that size this morning? I could actually see through the
crack that lets it in. I could see outside."
"What is it?" Asuka asked, temporarily forgetting her anger
with Rei and indulging in this sudden fascination.
"It is hope. Or at least that is what I thought. But now
it's almost gone, banished by you and your selfishness. Why did
you do it, Sohryu? Why? You were so close!" Rei's eyes gleamed
again, and Asuka swore she could feel the angry stare through her
back.
"I don't know what you are talking about! You haven't
explained anything to me! Hell, why should you! These are
nothing but nightmares. They don't mean anything." Asuka
stubbornly crossed her arms, then moved further into the small
stream of light.
"You are wrong, Sohryu. When you wake, that is the true
nightmare. Look," Rei began again, realizing she wasn't making
much of an impact with Asuka. "How do you feel, now, while in the
light? And think a moment before you answer. What is the experience
truly like?"
Asuka huffed in agitation, but proceeded to close her eyes
and concentrate. She sat motionless for a moment, allowing the
light to play off her chest. "I feel.... I feel warm," she began.
"It's like I want to be here forever, luxuriating in it. I feel
wanted, needed, almost as if there's nothing to fear any more." Asuka's
eyes snapped open. "But that's stupid. I know better. I've learned
better."
"No," Rei quickly countered, feeling as if the battle were
slipping away from her at an even faster pace. "It is not stupid.
You can have that feeling, Sohryu. You can claim it in the world
that is so dark for you now."
"I don't like being lied to," Asuka snarled, beginning to seethe
again.
"I am not lying. You began the journey earlier. Truly you did.
But now, now you're lost again, and you must pull yourself back.
Quickly, Sohryu, before it is too late."
"I'll live my life however I damn well please, Wondergirl. So,
from now on, you can just keep your nose out of it."
"It's not just about you!" Rei exploded. "I need to be free,
Sohryu! I've reached my limit! I can no longer survive in this
prison you've staked me to!"
"What?" Asuka gasped, spinning back around to face Rei. She
was too late, though. Rei had disappeared once again.
* * *
"So, Shinji," Asuka questioned him, a sickeningly sweet smile
twisting her lips, "how does it feel to be helpless?"
Shinji tried to sink further into his bench, hoping that the
dim light of the train car would somehow fail to illuminate him.
Perhaps then Asuka would leave him alone. She had been here, with
him, for hours it seemed, prattling on and on about him, and his
current blindness. He had tried once to run from her, but found
that both ends of the car were locked. There was no escape. He was
utterly at Asuka's mercy.
"I'm not useless," Shinji weakly offered in his defense.
"Oh, of course you are," Asuka countered merrily. "How could
you be anything but, when I have to lead the poor little blind boy
from A to B to C, just so he can accomplish a simple task like
cooking breakfast. I mean, good lord, talk about self delusion, Shinji.
You're good for nothing now. Face up to it."
Shinji buried his face in his hands, and tried to find something
within him that would spur him on to fight back. He searched for anything,
something that could save him. Perhaps he could mention that she didn't
exactly lead him, but more spurred him into action? No, that wouldn't
work. Asuka would have an answer for anything he said. She always did.
He was beaten, well and truly.
Maybe, then, he was actually worthless. Maybe he had no redeeming
value left. Maybe it was time for him to move on, to keep from being a
burden to the people he cared about. Maybe....
Shinji's thoughts were interrupted by the sharp sound of flesh
striking flesh. His head flew from his hands, and his eyes snapped
open. Standing in front of Asuka was a very angry looking Misato,
arm held out in the follow through of a strike.
The red and purple welt that was quickly rising on Asuka's
cheek seemed to envelope and distort her young body. Shinji watched,
enraptured, as her now fuzzy limbs and torso elongated, and her mane
of hair shortened to a mop. When finally the body that sat opposite
him returned to clear focus, Asuka was no longer there. Instead, Yui
Ikari stared back at her son, a hand clamped firmly to the spreading
injury on her cheek.
"Glad you finally decided to show him who was behind all this,"
Misato stated, smiling in victory.
"Shinji," Yui calmly said, ignoring the major, "we need to talk
alone. Could you tell your friend to leave please?"
"Mother, I...." Shinji wasn't sure what was happening. First
Asuka....oh God, Asuka....for so long, just sitting there, tearing him
to pieces. Then all the sudden there was Misato, and now his....his
mother. His mother. HIS mother!
"Misato, do you think you could leave us alone for a few minutes?
It's been so long since I've seen her," Shinji asked, choked tears
springing from his eyes.
Yui smiled politely, pleased at the request, while Misato
gaped in shock.
"No," Misato countered adamantly. "I won't leave you
alone."
"Misato, please?" Shinji looked pleadingly at her.
"Damnit, Shinji, you don't understand. You can't listen to
anything she tells you. You mustn't accept her lies!"
"Shinji, dear," Yui interjected, gracefully leaning forward
on her knees. "If you don't want her here, she can't stay. You
have the power to make sure of that."
Misato waved her arms widely, trying to distract his attention.
"No, Shinji. Don't do this. Do not listen to her!"
"Misato," Shinji stated. "Please leave, for now."
Suddenly a great gust of wind thrust itself through the train
car, pulling Misato with it, and throwing her through the now open
door at its end. She tried to cry out a last warning, but her voice
was swallowed by the howling and whipping of the gale. When her last
stretching fingertip slipped through the door, its great metal bulk
swung shut.
"Very good," Yui stated, very much pleased with the display.
"Now, listen to me, Shinji. We have much to discuss about your
current situation."
As she began to speak, neither of them noticed the far door
creak open a fraction, its lock bolt having missed the proper
clasp.
* * *
Asuka stumbled out of her bedroom, a cold sweat awash on her
skin. She fell against the hallway's wall, and slid shakily to the
floor. God, they wouldn't stop. Why couldn't they stop?
"Asuka?"
Her head snapped up, eyes opening wide in the heavy darkness.
Crouched against the opposite wall was Shinji, curled up in something
of a protective ball. Asuka simply stared at him for a moment, noting
the vulnerability of his position and tone of voice.
"Nightmares?" she finally asked, her own voice barely rising above a
whisper.
"Nightmares," Shinji confirmed in equal quiet. "You?"
"Yeah," Asuka said, pulling herself into a similar position as Shinji.
"Nightmares."
Neither of the children even twitched when the phone began
to softly buzz.
* * *
Beep.
"Katsuragi. It's me. I'm going to have to take a rain check on
that date we had planned. Something's come up, and I'm leaving for Germany
early this morning. Don't worry, I'll tell you all about it when I get back.
Well, that, and you can show me how much you missed me.
Anyway, wait to hear about my trip, before you starting planning anything on
your own. I'll talk to you later, then, Katsuragi.
Oh, one more thing. Talk to As...."
Click.
The answering machine shut off.
[End Part four]
End Notes:
I'd just like to take this opportunity to thank my pre-readers: Axel Terizaki, Misti
Ikari, Kyo Tetsuei, Skull_Leader, and Sebastian. As always they, have proved
an enormous help in the writing of this fic. Round of applause for them, please.
distribution rights belong to AD Vision. No profit is being made from this work,
so let's file all thoughts of lawsuits away. Thanks much.
Author's Notes: Hi there, folks. Anyone remember me, or this story? Just kidding.
Actually, I would like to dedicate this chapter to anyone and everyone who e-mailed
me over the past year inquiring about the status of Corners and its newest chapter.
If it weren't for your persistent and enthusiastic questions, I probably would never
have worked up the enthusiasm myself to sustain me through an all night writing
session to get the rough draft of this done. So, my many and sincere thanks. And
now, a year late, but two months earlier than originally thought, Part 4 of "From
all Corners they Cried." I hope you enjoy.
Oh yes, any and all comments and criticism are welcome. I can be contacted
at doc7dmz@aol.com, Asuka-chan@fanfix.zzn.com, or Asuka_rocks@naboomail.com. Take
your pick, I check them all.
1) * . . . . * shows thoughts.
One A.M. One A.M., and she was still at it, still sitting in front of
her console, typing away, entering line after line of code. Hyuga and Aoba had
long since left, and anyone else remaining on the bridge of NERV control was
obscured by the grand shadows that crept everywhere in its low lighting. What
was she doing here? If she kept at it any longer, she might never be able to type
again, much less participate in a further upgrade to the Magi systems. It was definitely
time for a break.
Lieutenant Maya Ibuki pushed her chair away from the slaving keyboard and
painfully stretched her fingers out, wincing each time a joint cracked. She could
type, enter data, no doubt about it, but the sheer volume necessary to perform an
upgrade and improve the Magi was staggering. Maya had been absolutely sure
that Dr. Akagi would have wanted to oversee the final stages of such an important
event herself, but had been equally stunned and astonished when her mentor had
delegated that duty to her. It was a test of sorts, she had said, to see if Maya
had really progressed in her abilities and understanding to the point where Ritsuko
thought she was. If so, it would be easily possible for Maya to find herself moving
on to bigger and better things within the organization. After all, it would be an
incredible shame if they were to waste a mind such as hers forever on the bridge.
Or so Dr. Akagi said.
At the thought of promotion, Maya found herself somewhat uncomfortable.
It wasn't that she minded taking on more responsibilities or greater challenges,
her current job was somewhat limited in that department, she just felt. . . .she
felt so used to being where she was. This had become her station. Yes, during
some of the off shifts and odd times, others sat here, but any time the Major or
either of the Commanders were on the bridge, she was here. Even as much she didn't
want to admit it, Maya had even become fond of both Hyuga and Aoba, despite their
seemingly odd and childish propensities.
Perhaps that was a problem. Perhaps she had become too comfortable here,
too prideful of the fact that whenever an emergency occurred she was moved in over
anyone and everyone else. Perhaps she should welcome these greater things that Dr.
Akagi had spoke of. Shouldn't she? Faint images of the Evangelions, the children,
and their stone cold commander flashed through her mind, reminding Maya of what
exactly advancement within NERV might mean for her.
Maya ground the heels of her palms into the dark spots beneath her eyes.
"I must be more tired than I thought. There's no reason for me to be getting
jittery." Glancing quickly at her watch, Maya noted that she had lost five minutes
to idle contemplation and dreams. Rolling her chair forward, she stretched her
fingers across the keyboard and flicked her eyes over the printout Dr. Akagi had
given her. There were about four hundred more lines of code to go. Right, time
to get this finished.
The Commander had deadlines, after all.
* * *
Rei followed the faint glimmer through the thick darkness, looking
entirely too much like a fascinated kitten stalking a stretch of twine. There
was light here. Light that was not her own. It was amazing, it was astounding. . . .
it was impossible. Unless. . . .
No, that couldn't be it. Could it? Sohryu could not have made such progress
since the last time she confronted her. Beside which, Rei had decided not to visit her
this morning. She had done so the previous day, and it had proved largely ineffective.
It would be better, perhaps, for her to let that day's events settle without any further
interruptions. It was true that her time was limited, but then nothing worthwhile had
ever been gained by rushing about blindly. A process such as this was delicate and
fragile, especially with a girl like Sohryu. One push too many and everything could
shatter forever.
And all her hopes would be lost.
There! She could see it now! It was a band, small and thin, almost
obsequious in its near invisibility. Rei thought her heart would soar at the
sight. At first, when she had initially noticed the glimmer, she had not been
sure it was actually there. Even while tracking it, it had seemed eminently
possible that it was just a figment of her imagination, a whim of fantasy to
give her hope. But now, now she could see it! It was there, casting a shadow
of light across the floor that distorted the darkness.
Trembling, Rei knelt in front of the black wall and ran her fingers
along its smooth surface. Her eyes were fixated by the light, and her small
finger tips fell into the rough crack that allowed the beauteous event inside.
She hungrily pressed her face against the wall, and moved her eyes along the
crack. There were greens, reds, blues, yellows! Everything that she had so
long been denied. It was all there, and so very, very close.
Rei fell away from the wall, and felt the corners of her mouth turn
instantly upwards. "There is hope, after all," she sighed.
"From all Corners they Cried"
An Evangelion Fanfic
by Dave Ziegler
Part four "Fallout/Three Days Hence"
Version 1.3
Beep. Beep. Beep.
Asuka stirred momentarily, then fell back into her pillows,
completely ignorant of the small buzzing clock that sat next to her bed.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
The clock chimed a little louder this time. Asuka emphatically flipped
her pillows on top of her head.
BEEP. BEEP. BEEP!
"Oh, for God's sake," Asuka muttered, climbing out of bed and harshly
swatting the off switch on her clock. "Why do I have to go back to school today,
anyway?" She moved toward her dresser and dimly searched through its stray
contents, before picking up her sling, arranging it around her neck, and gently
easing her injured arm into it.
Her shoulder was still raw and tender from where the bullet had entered,
and where the doctors had needed to operate to remove it. While she couldn't
make the arm move in many of the usual and appropriate directions, Asuka was sure
she wouldn't have any trouble recovering in the long run. Nothing as simple as
this would keep her down. She could endure the pain.
The sling was damn annoying, though.
While she could free her arm at night when sleeping, the NERV doctors had
ordered her to wear, when awake, a sling. The apparatus would help to keep her
arm immobilized, and therefore discourage it from making any sudden or awkward
movements that might endanger the healing process. It also served the function
of support, alleviating any of the normal pressure a free arm would apply to
said shoulder. Unfortunately for Asuka, the device left her feeling like an
invalid, as she was unused to doing anything with just one hand. Still, she
could survive. Asuka refused to let a lousy wad of fabric and plastic get the
better of her.
This was just another trial for her to face.
Trials. Asuka sighed heavily as she slipped out of her room. She had
had another of those nightmares last night, the ones with the angelically illuminated
Rei moving about a landscape of utter pitch. The first she had merely attributed to
shock from the attack, but now that it had happened again, she wasn't so sure. It
could still be the reason, she supposed. Being shot is not something you're likely
to get over in a few days.
Actually, it didn't really matter much what brought them on. Asuka just
wanted them to stop. They frightened her. The damn things actually frightened her!
Wondergirl was not her favorite of people to begin with, but to have the girl moving
about inside her dreams, talking of trials in riddles, it was too much. Especially
that landscape: Ayanami's realm, the never ending stretch of blackness. Asuka
couldn't stand it. She hated black. Things should be bright and bold, like red.
Terrible things hid in the dark, dire twists and fearful surprises. All should
be in the open, where she could see it, and where she could control it.
Struggling to put the dilemmas of the night behind her, Asuka slid her
door closed, then stepped toward Shinji's. She stopped just sort of grabbing
its handle, then thought better of it. Shinji was still in no shape to go
to school, and, after what she had said to him yesterday, it was probably not the
best of times to rouse him in her usual fashion, if to speak to him at all.
Gently rubbing her forehead, Asuka strained to figure out how life had
gotten so screwed up. She had been shot by a cowardly little boy, terminating
her status on the active roster of Eva pilots for a time (something she found
extremely irritating), and now she was feeling guilty about saying stuff to Shinji.
That idiot. Of all people, why would she have to go and feel sorry for bothering
him? It was totally undignified.
Then there was Misato. Not that Asuka expected much from her personally,
but the woman had always seemed to be extraordinarily devoted to Shinji. After the accident,
she would have thought that Misato would be running about the apartment almost
twenty-four hours a day, playing nursemaid to Shinji's every need as he recovered.
Instead, NERV's precious director of operations had dumped all of those duties
on Asuka, then disappeared the entire night. A quick glance toward Misato's room
told her that she had yet to even come back. Maybe Misato wasn't as concerned for
Shinji as Asuka originally thought?
"No," Asuka surmised. "Couldn't be. That woman would go to hell and back
for him. She's probably just learning to cope with it all. And more than likely
in Kaji's bed," she uttered, her voice laced with danger.
Just as Asuka was about to begin brooding on the topic of her one time and
current guardian, a very large and very deafening crash roused her fully, and
brought her running into the kitchen.
The room was an utter mess.
A white mountainous mass of rice lay spread across the countertops,
oddly contrasted by the equally large pile of coffee grinds that sat within a
relative distance of the brewer. A loaf of bread lay opened and discarded upon
the floor, the toaster sitting just above, mocking in its proximity. And near
the burning stove, amidst a pile of fallen pots and pans, sat Shinji, wearing the
most frustrated and angry expression Asuka had ever seen grace the boy's features.
"What the hell is going on here?" she demanded, not all happy about facing
the prospect of fixing the mess.
Pen-Pen, who stood just outside his refrigerator and watched the scene with
a slightly worried air, turned to Asuka and squawked with concern. Shinji, for his
part, crumpled at the sound of Asuka's voice and lost all of the fire and emotion
that had been evident in him only scant moments before.
"I couldn't sleep, Asuka," Shinji said, his voice quiet and strained. "I
needed something to do to get away from the nightmares."
"Oh, and let me guess," she sneered, "destroying the kitchen and scaring
Pen-Pen seemed the perfect solution for insomnia to you?"
"I was just sitting at the table," Shinji said, "thinking."
"Then what is all this?" Asuka threw her arms wide to encompass the
entirety of the kitchen. Shinji couldn't see her gesture, but it did not matter.
He already knew exactly what she was talking about, and the thought of this one
more lost ability nearly crushed his voice and spirit.
"It's my turn to make breakfast, isn't it? Besides, Asuka, you never like
to do it, even when you're supposed to. I thought it would be easier with your
shoulder, too," he managed.
Asuka pulled a step away from Shinji, gently running a hand along the sling.
"My shoulder?" she asked, this time finding her own voice subdued.
"Misato told me about it, when she brought me home from the infirmary."
Shinji's face remained placid and static. "You might as well help yourself, Asuka.
I can't do anything. You are right, too. I don't even know why I bothered trying.
I'm sorry." Shinji let his face sink into his knees.
The idiot, why had he tried to do this himself? Asuka knew she could have
handled it, one handed or not. Why did he have to go and feel sorry for her, like
she was in worse condition than he was. He couldn't possibly think that he was
more capable than she, that she needed coddling. This was just too far beyond his
normal levels of stupidity, it was. . . . it was. . . .it was something he had
done before. Even when they were both uninjured, he had moved to shield her in
any number of situations.
As if she needed any help from him.
"Get up," Asuka said. Her voice wavered for a moment, as if it wasn't
quite sure what tone to take, and awaited the victor of her silent battle.
Shinji, meanwhile, still cradled his head and made no move that showed he
was even acknowledging Asuka's presence, much less her demand.
"GET UP, IKARI!" Asuka thundered, the battle now over. "You are not
running away from this one, so get off your ass!"
Survival instincts kicking into gear, for he dared never ignore
Asuka when she adopted that tone, Shinji scrambled to his
feet and turned himself toward her explosive voice.
"All right, Third Child. We're going to have to do something about
all this. First off, I think you should turn off that stove before something
even worse happens in here."
"How?" Shinji's voice was suddenly laced with a mix of remorse, anger,
self pity, and apathy.
Asuka, though, wasn't about to let him indulge in any of it. "Are you
stupid? Turn the dial, of course!"
"That's easy for you to say, Asuka. You can still see the damn thing!"
Shinji exploded. "I can't! Or did you forget again?"
Asuka's mouth went dry. Shinji's words had struck something inside her,
and now it was blaring inside her head, clamoring for all the attention it could
gather from her.
'Guilty, guilty, guilty,' a voice sang inside her. 'It's all your fault,
and yet you forget. It's all your fault, and yet you push it away, down deep, like
it never really happened. You want clean hands don't you? You want to be able
to distance yourself from it all, pretend you're not involved. You can't though,
you are the center, the eye of the storm. You know you're guilty, guilty, guilty.'
No. Asuka would not let Shinji's words affect her like this. She would
not give in to the pressure.
Asuka quickly took the few steps that lay in between her and Shinji and
grabbed the boy by his shirt, pressing her face very close to his. "Listen to
me, Shinji. You are going to turn off that stove, you are going to clean up
this mess, and then you are going to make me a decent breakfast. You want to
know why, Third Child? Because you know this kitchen better than any of us,
and could have created a feast if I had blindfolded you just last week. So,
get off your lazy ass, Shinji. I am hungry!"
"Do you really think I can?"
"Ah! If you don't move it now, Ikari, I might just go find Misato,
and get her to cook us something."
"Right," Shinji said, taking a step back from Asuka as she released
him. "I can do this."
"That's the attitude, Shinji! Now, let's get going. You don't want
to press me when I'm really hungry," Asuka stated.
* * *
The door slowly swung open as Dr. Ritsuko Akagi made her way
into the office. She swept a quick hand through her blonde hair, and
produced a small shoulder bag bearing a large red cross on its side.
"Well," Misato asked, nodding her head in the direction of Ritsuko's
accessory.
"Everything I need is in here," the doctor replied evenly. "I'm
ready anytime you are."
Misato continued to fidget with a pen from her desk, her nerves
getting the better of her. Fighting Angels she could handle, this was
different. "You are sure this will work?" she asked, hoping her friend
would assuage her fears.
"I can't make you any guarantees, Misato. You should know that.
We can't be certain of a positive outcome."
Misato leapt to her feet. "Then why the hell are we even considering
this?"
"Would you prefer," Ritsuko began, still very calm in the face of her
friend's mounting anger and anxiety, "that we followed through with the Commander's
original plan, and simply send Shinji back to his previous guardian?"
"No," Misato replied, suitably subdued. "I wouldn't want that at all."
"Well, it seems your only choice is to let me proceed, then," Ritsuko
said, patting her bag. "Don't worry, Misato. I'm sure this will all work out.
Have some faith. After all, you are putting Shinji into the very capable
hands of science."
* * *
Asuka focused on the form of Shinji Ikari, as he moved methodically about
the kitchen. The rice, bread, and coffee no longer lay about in a haphazard
mess, but were neatly placed in a row upon the countertop. The pleasant smell of
fresh toast and butter slipped through the air and tickled her nose.
He was almost finished cooking.
For a moment, Asuka felt dread at that prospect. She was safe here, at the
opposite end of the room. But every time that Shinji strayed near her in his
endeavor, that tiny voice within her head found a megaphone, and promptly started
blaring its message.
Damnit all, she wasn't guilty of anything, though! The decision to act
was his, right? Asuka never had any influence upon it. Right? RIGHT?
"Ugh," Asuka groaned, pushing her face into her palms. Between this and the
nightmares, she would be certifiable within the week. Why couldn't it all just
go away, and leave her in peace?
"Asuka?" Shinji called. He walked carefully toward the table, tentatively
placing each foot in front of the other, almost as if he were worried the floor
might sink beneath him. In one arm he nestled the plate of toast, while the other
balanced a large bowl of steaming rice.
"Here," Asuka resignedly beckoned, "let me take the rice. Wouldn't want for
you to trip and have to start all over again, now would we?" She watched Shinji
scowl slightly at the comment, but he made no remark in return.
No, argument this time. No easy escape. Just a little peace, then?
Please?
* * *
There was a short click, then the door to the apartment slipped
open. Misato stepped quickly through, kicked off her pumps, and threw her
bomber jacket into a spare corner. Ritsuko, for her part, neatly removed
and stacked her own shoes, then followed the major into the living room.
"Just out of curiosity, Misato," Ritsuko ventured, "does Shinji ever have
any friends over to the apartment, or do your blatant displays of sloth and
laziness embarrass him too much?"
"Ha, ha," Misato muttered. "For your information, Ritsu, Shinji does
have friends over, and he isn't at all embarrassed by me."
"Are you sure he just doesn't mention it to avoid creating any sort
of problem?"
"Oh, just shut up, will you." Misato turned from Ritsuko, and cupped
her hands around her mouth. "I'M HOME!" she bellowed.
Ritsuko rolled her eyes. "Of course, how could you possibly
embarrass him?"
After receiving no immediate response, the pair made their way
to the kitchen, following the smell of a freshly cooked breakfast. Sitting
at the small table were both Shinji and Asuka, frozen in the act of eating.
"Well, well," Asuka commented darkly, her eyes cutting into Misato,
"look who finally decided to come home."
Misato matched the young girl's glare for a few moments, then backed
off in perplexity. "You're an hour late for your first day back at school,
Asuka. Don't you think you should get a move on?"
"Oh, Christ!" Asuka shouted. Her eyes flew from Misato to her watch.
Fleetingly gathering the information there, Asuka then sped from her chair
and out of the kitchen, a string a muttered curses and harsh words falling
in her wake.
Ritsuko smirked at the scene. "I can see what a positive influence
you are turning out be, Misato. Should you ever actually have children, remind
me to send them a sympathy card at birth."
A haze of red and green flew past the kitchen doorway yet again,
followed by a quickly discarded "See ya, Shinji."
"Bye, Asuka," the boy called back, startling both Misato and Ritsuko
momentarily. They had, in the moment, found themselves so intent on Asuka
that neither had really yet acknowledged the presence of the person they came
to see.
"Have a nice day, Asuka!" Misato threw in too, having waited long
enough for her own good-bye. The front door simply slammed shut.
"Well, now that that's over, might we get on with things, Misato?"
Ritsuko asked, turning toward Shinji. "Good morning, Shinji. How are you
feeling today?"
"Pretty good, I guess," Shinji managed around a further bite of toast.
Ritsuko waited for him to elaborate, but was disappointed. Well, perhaps
Misato might be able to coax something further out of him.
"Misato," Ritsuko began, then stopped. The woman was standing frozen,
eyes locked on the doorway of the kitchen. The expression that played with
her face was one of puzzlement and subdued anger. "Misato," Ritsuko called
again.
"Huh? What?" Misato spun toward Ritsuko. "Did you say something?"
"Can we get this moving, please?"
"Sure thing, Ritsu." Misato plopped herself down in Asuka's
discarded spot, and took a healthy bite of rice. "Morning, Shinji,"
she enthused around the rice. "Wow, this is good. Nice of Asuka to make
you breakfast, wasn't it?"
"I made breakfast today," Shinji corrected her.
Misato choked on her rice.
"You made all this?" she queried in disbelief. Her eyes took in
the large bowl of fresh rice, the platter of toast and butter, and the pot
of boiling coffee, all ready for consumption. "With Asuka's help, right?"
Shinji shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "She did help at first,
actually. Asuka kind of got me motivated by yelling. But I did make it all
myself."
"She yelled...." Misato began angrily, rising from her chair. Ritsuko,
fortunately, interrupted her.
"I see, Shinji. Asuka helped you to remember that you do most of the
chores around here anyway, and by virtue of that fact, should know the layout
of the all the necessities quite well."
Shinji merely nodded his affirmation.
"Well," Ritsuko approved, "she can put that mind of hers to use
when she's so inclined. Now, Shinji, Misato and I have something very
important we need to discuss with you. Do you understand?"
"Okay," Shinji agreed, not at all sure he liked the sound of
'important'.
"As we discussed before, your current condition is a result of
the damage done to your optic nerve by the gunshot wound you received to
the head. Now, what you may or may not be aware of is the fact that the
nerve was not completely severed, and so the brain is still receiving bits
of the information gathered by your eyes."
"Is that why when I move toward the sound of your voice, I can see
a kind of tall grey blob?"
"Basically, yes. I won't bother to go into many of the specifics,
but the fact that your nerve was not completely destroyed is a very critical
point. Because we have live tissue to work with, it may be possible, with
the use of a still experimental drug, to stimulate a regrowth and regeneration
of your optic nerve."
"What that means," Misato chimed in, "is that we may be able to fix
what's broken, and get you your vision back."
"That's great!" Shinji enthused, allowing himself to show signs of
hope and excitement. He suddenly felt like jumping out of his chair and
dancing around the kitchen. If Doctor Akagi could fix this, then he would
be able to pilot Eva again. Heck, he would be able to do the laundry, cook
like he used too, watch the moon, or even a slow sunrise. He would simply be
able to do again!
"There are some things we should warn you about, though, Shinji,"
Ritsuko stated, eviscerating his happy mood with a clinical incision. "The
drug we plan to use, Rhoxtenphelin, is new and experimental. It has yet to
be tested upon the human physiognomy, but it has exhibited great success among
tests with different animal subjects. It is just a matter of tweaking certain
bits of the drug to suit the desired species. Because of the untested nature
of it, though, there may be a possibility for unforeseen and dangerous side
effects."
"We need to know whether or not you think it is worth the risk, Shinji,"
Misato told him. "We need to know whether you want to try this."
Both women waited while the young boy sat upon his chair, eyes closed
in concentration. It was not, despite his earlier jubilation at the prospect,
an easy decision to make. After all, as Ritsuko had said, there could be any
number of side effects from this drug, some possibly even dangerous. Was his
sight worth risking his life over? But then how much of a life could he live
without it? He could not pilot Eva, which meant that he was of no use to any
one here. And he wanted to stay.
Shinji wanted to stay right where he was.
"I want it. I want to try this," Shinji stated lifting his head.
"Good." Ritsuko slipped the bag from her shoulder and placed it on
the table next to the rice. "I have the first injection right here, Shinji.
So, we'll start now. After this, you should receive about one every week.
I suspect we should start to see some signs of its effects within the first
two weeks. Then after reviewing the results, we will proceed from there."
"I understand," Shinji affirmed, and prepared himself for the bite of
the needle.
* * *
"Idiot, idiot, idiot," Asuka muttered to herself. "Why did I have
to spend so much time dealing with that idiot."
The school's lunchroom was a very crowded affair. Usually, each and
every table was packed with friends and students taking the one respite they
could enjoy in a day full of academics and pressures. Today, however, every
table toward the room's far corner lay intentionally abandoned, left to a
brooding and generally unhappy Asuka. It had long since become common knowledge
among the student body that steering clear of the girl on one of her good days
was an idea wisely adopted. Crossing her on a bad day was something best not
thought about.
And so Asuka sat alone, one arm folded atop the chipped formica table,
and her head a layer after that. "If he hadn't been distracting me so much I
wouldn't have forgotten my lunch, damnit! And I'm hungry. Breakfast wasn't
nearly that good," Asuka grumbled.
"Thinking about, Shinji," a polite and happy voice inquired. Hikari
Horaki promptly sat down next to Asuka, blatantly defying the school's unspoken
code.
"Hi, Hikari," Asuka managed. "And, no, I was not 'thinking' about
him. I was simply contemplating the various ways I can inflict pain and
suffering upon him for, first, making me late and humiliating me in front
of the class, and, two, for making me forget my lunch."
"You can have some of mine, if you like, Asuka." Hikari pushed her
lunch box between her and her friend. As Asuka rose to greedily grab the
spare set of chopsticks that Hikari was holding out to her, she noticed that
her friend was looking straight ahead at the wall. Asuka frowned as she
followed Hikari's nervous eyes, and found them constantly glancing from
her sling back to the wall. *She couldn't possibly be that conscious of
social niceties, could she?* Asuka thought, shaking her head.
"It happened during an exercise," Asuka stated, startling Hikari
into looking at her.
"What happened?" the pigtailed girl asked.
"My arm," Asuka asserted, gesturing with her chin in the direction
of the offending limb. "My shoulder, actually. I was injured during a
practice sortie with our Eva's. The entire mess was baka Shinji's fault,
anyway."
"Was it? How did he.... I mean how did the accident happen?"
"Well," Asuka began, "I'm not allowed to go into specifics or anything
with unauthorized personal, but let's just say it was all due to another of
his typical examples of clumsy piloting."
"Oh," Hikari managed, trying to reconcile the story with her knowledge
and image of Shinji.
"Don't worry about it, Hikari. I'll be good as new in a few weeks.
And, besides, Shinji got hurt in the accident too. A lot worse than me,
actually, so I'm revenged."
"Asuka! That's horrible!" Hikari berated her, straightening right
up in her chair. "You should never be happy because of someone else's pain."
"What? Why not?" Asuka demanded, dropping her chopsticks. "I'm stuck
being the living impaired for a month all because he can't control himself."
"It's not something you should do, Asuka. It is a disgusting, evil
trait."
"Well, live with it, or move somewhere else. I have every right to
be angry with Shinji."
Hikari backed her chair away from the redhead, wary of the blaze that
her eyes held. For a moment, she looked as though she would actually get up
and follow Asuka's advice, but then Hikari steeled herself and settled back
into her chair. "No, I think I'll stay, Asuka. After all, you're going to
need my help to get rid of this anger. Accidents happen, we just need to
learn to accept them and move on. Brooding over the consequences won't
accomplish anything." Hikari smiled confidently at Asuka. "You'll see
it my way, eventually, I'm sure."
"I wouldn't bank on it," Asuka grumbled, then took a swift bite of food.
* * *
"Mr. Aramaki!"
Kaji rose from the small chair next to the pretty young
secretary's desk where he had been waiting for the last twenty minutes,
and nodded his acknowledgment of the man who now stood before him.
Masaki Ikeda was a short fellow by all standards, round of the face
and stomach, but possessed of very keen and knowledgeable eyes. His
black suit was sharp and pressed, and the red tie that hung at his neck
was not a centimeter out of place.
"Had I but been informed of your arrival earlier, Mr. Aramaki, I
could have arranged for a suitable workspace for you."
Kaji waved off the man's worries with a warm smile. "Not at all,
Mr. Ikeda. The Board of Education doesn't want to put any additional stress
on you and your staff. I'm here to help, not burden you. All that I
require is a spare computer terminal from which to review the child's records."
Ikeda nodded, and waved for Kaji to follow him through the office.
"I am very pleased that the board gave us such a prompt response. This
child is beginning to worry me. She comes across very unstable, to the point
where even her teacher's are beginning to worry."
"Unstable in what sense, sir?" Kaji asked. One hand moved to adjust
his own tie, while the other lay inside his jacket pocket, quietly fingering
the description that he had acquired of the boy who attacked both Shinji and
Asuka.
"Emotionally. Now, normally I or my staff can handle such problems.
We are all trained to the utmost, and are very knowledgeable about the stresses
that children can undergo, especially living in the time we do. But this one is
different. This child's situation is unique, and I don't know exactly how we
should handle it."
"Hence your request for a specialist," Kaji smiled.
"Exactly," Ikeda conceded. "I only hope that you can find out what
the root of the girl's problem's are, and help the child." Ikeda continued to
walk for another few paces before stopping in front of an open door. "Here we
are. This is Mr. Hino's office, but he is currently on a leave of absence. So,
it is yours for however long you need it."
Ikeda walked into the small room, Kaji following a step behind. "The
computer terminal is on the desk, and online. And should you need anything else
to help you in your work, please do contact me." Mr. Ikeda moved to leave, but
then stopped. "Oh yes, and before you decide to talk to the girl, do please
update me of your plans. I would much appreciate it."
"You can be sure I will, Mr. Ikeda," Kaji assured the man, while taking
his place behind the desk.
"Good, good."
"Ah, Mr. Ikeda," Kaji began, stalling the shorter man from making his
exit. "There is just one thing before you go. I need to know the name of the
student you wish me to help."
"Oh, yes. Of course. Her name is Sohryu. Asuka Langley Sohryu.
She is a transfer student from Germany, and one of those Evangelion pilots.
That's one of the reasons that I believed we couldn't begin to meet her
needs in terms of counseling. But neither could I ignore the fact that she
consistently creates an aggressive and hostile atmosphere around her, one
that has bothered both students and teachers. It is not good for her, her
fellow students, or this school. I leave the situation in your capable
hands, Mr. Aramaki."
Kaji frowned, then folded his hands in front of his face. "Don't
worry yourself, Mr. Ikeda. I think I can be of great value and effect
here."
"I'm very relieved to hear that. Well, I will let you get to work
reading her file. Until later then, Mr. Aramaki." Ikeda turned and left
the small office, closing the door behind him. Kaji, for his part, shook
off the disturbing revelation he had just encountered, and filed it away
for future action. He had a purpose in coming here, and it was time to
get down to business.
Spinning his chair toward the computer terminal, Kaji grabbed ahold
of the keyboard with one hand, and brought the piece of folded paper from
his pocket with the other. He quickly spread it on his desk, reread it
to check the mental image of the boy he had compiled, then went to work
bringing up student files and photographs.
* * *
Rei Ayanami stood within the small copse of trees just outside
of the school yard, cloaked in a shade of browns and greens. If anyone
had actually concentrated upon the grove, they might have noticed two
deep points of red staring intensely out of the blackness, following
their movements with unequivocal precision. But as it was, Rei's subjects
were completely unaware of both herself and the trees.
"So, she wouldn't tell you anything about what happened?" Toji
Suzuhara complained, thrusting his hands into the air. "Typical of the
Red Devil." Rei was familiar with this boy. He was a classmate of both
hers and Ikari's, yet something more to Shinji. He spent much of his time
with this boy, very similar to the amount she spent with the Commander when
inside the Geofront.
"No, she wouldn't specify, Suzuhara. Asuka just said that there was
an accident while training, and that it was Shinji's fault somehow. She
said that he did something clumsy. And don't call her Red Devil." Hikari
Horaki, the class representative. Two brown pigtails, a matching set of
eyes, freckles, hidden strength, something of an extrovert: Rei's mind
flashed through all the information she had catalogued about the girl since
they first came into contact.
"Aw, come on, Hikari. Both me and Toji have seen Shinji fight in his
Evangelion. He may not like it, but he is good at it. Can you see him
screwing up because of clumsiness?" Kensuke Aida, another of Ikari's associates.
Somewhat more reserved than the other two, this boy spent less time around
others, Rei noted, and more time working with his computer.
"Yeah," Toji added. "I bet you she's the one who screwed up, and is
just trying to pass off the blame to save face while Shinji's not here to
give the whole story."
"Suzuhara!" Hikari exclaimed. "Stop that. I do not know what really
happened any more than you, but indulging in scandal won't help. If anything,
we should go to the Major's apartment, and see both of them ourselves. They
are hurt, you know, and that means that they could use some cheering up from
their closest friends, right?"
They meant to go to Ikari and Sohryu. Would that be permissible in the
Commander's eyes? If they were allowed inside, then the fabrication that was
created to cover up the truth about the attack would be destroyed. The
disruption caused by such a revelation could cause problems for the Commander's
work. "That course of action cannot be permitted," Rei stated, stepping from
the trees. "Both Ikari and Pilot Sohryu are not allowed visitors at this
time."
"Rei!" Toji gasped in surprise.
"Ayanami," Hikari stuttered, "were you eavesdropping on us?"
Rei felt her cheeks tinge slightly with color, and she looked quickly
toward the ground. Suddenly she felt uncomfortable, but still, she could
not let that stop her. "I apologize. But you must not go to Major Katsuragi's
apartment."
"Why not?" Kensuke demanded of her, peering through his somewhat thick
glasses. Fantasies about espionage and conspiracy danced in his mind as he
considered what Rei, of all people, might be doing eavesdropping on them.
"Ikari's injury requires a great deal of attention," Rei stated. "His
care must not be interrupted."
"Is it that serious?" Hikari wanted to know, her hands bunching together
at her chest in worry.
"Yes." Rei intently watched their three faces as they twisted into frowns
and other troubled expressions. "Ikari's situation distresses you? Are you in
pain?" she ventured.
"Well, of course, we're in pain!" Toji spat. "Our good friend is hurt,
you're telling us that it is a serious injury, and that we can't even see him!"
Rei stared blankly at them for a moment, pondering Toji's response. Finally,
she asked, "You say you are in pain, yet I can see no injuries on any of
you. How is that?"
Toji's mouth worked silently for a moment, trying to find some response
to the blue haired girl's question. Kensuke, for his part, simply remained
silent, observing the exchange with a keen and practiced air. It was finally
Hikari who took a step forward, then placed her hands on Rei's shoulders.
"The reason you can't see our injuries, Rei, is because they are blows
to the heart."
Rei stared blankly back at the class rep, one delicate hand tracing an
area of her chest.
"No," Hikari shook her head, smiling. "It's not our actual hearts that
have been injured, Rei, but our spirits."
The word spirit thundered throughout Rei's mind. Was this how pain
operated? Was this why she could not understand what the others were
experiencing? Because she was less than they, lacking a soul, or spirit
as Horaki called it. Was she deficient in comparison to these three other
children, being only a mere creation? Was she condemned for it?
"I do not think I understand," Rei said, bringing her eyes to meet
Hikari's.
"That's all right," the class rep assured her. "You will."
* * *
The lights in the Katsuragi apartment had all long since fallen
silent. Night stalked the outdoors, and no life stirred within the
confines of this building's walls. Misato had managed to make it
home tonight, unable to come up with a viable excuse to be out all
night two times in a row. She decided it would be easier to try and
track down some more information regarding the Section 2 operatives
tomorrow during her regular hours.
Aside from all that, she had been worried about Asuka. She had
come home in something of a gargantuan huff, which had only intensified
when she first laid eyes on Misato. Asuka had immediately thrown
herself into her room and refused to talk to either of her roommates.
Dinner had come and gone without her venturing out.
Misato had struggled vainly to get Asuka to leave her self
assigned prison, and talk about what was bothering her. Not a single
plea had worked.
Now Misato dozed in bed, fighting for a comfortable sleep. She
wanted to dream happy dreams. She wanted to dream of a time and place
where she jovially shared an apartment with both Shinji and Asuka.
* * *
Asuka awoke to find herself trapped in an ever present stretch
of darkness. Scrambling into a crouch, she took note of the shadows
upon shadows that seemed to grow from every crevice, and tried to
locate the tormentor she knew must be lurking somewhere near. After
all, she had not yet been in this place once without Ayanami showing
up.
And Asuka wasn't to be disappointed.
Rei came storming from the thick darkness, an intense fire
leaking from her eyes. She strode toward Asuka and grabbed the
girl by the front of her blouse. "You...." Rei struggled and frothed.
"You...." Unable to articulate her feelings, Rei simply let out an
unearthly roar of frustration, then began to drag Asuka through the
pitch environment.
"Hey!" Asuka roared. "What the hell do you think you're doing?
Let go of me this instant, Wondergirl!" She began to claw at Rei's
hands, but the other girl's iron grip never wavered. Increasingly
incensed that she could not break free, Asuka tried the only thing she
could think of. Bullying.
"Listen up, I'm giving you a chance to regain your senses here,
Wondergirl, before I do something that might permanently damage you.
And we know that no one wants the Commander's precious doll to get
broken, don't we?"
"Shut up," Rei commanded, then tightened her grip on Asuka.
Asuka's eyes grew wide in shock and anger. How could Rei talk
to her like that! She never said two words to anyone, much less
aggressively defended herself. And that tone, she had trouble
believing that it had left Ayanami's mouth. What the hell was going
on?
Before Asuka was able to voice any of her displeasure, though,
she found herself abruptly thrown forward. She skidded for a scant
few moments, then came to a dead stop as her back butted against something
solid.
"Ow!" she complained. "Damnit, that hurt!" Asuka untangled herself,
and quickly prepared to strike back at the albino bitch, but then stopped
short. She felt something warm on her shoulder, a presence that seemed
distinctly alien in a place such as this. Turning around, she found a
small stream of light shining upon herself, cutting through the darkness
and warming her now seemingly freezing body.
"Look at it," Rei told her. "Feel it. Did you know that it was
twice that size this morning? I could actually see through the
crack that lets it in. I could see outside."
"What is it?" Asuka asked, temporarily forgetting her anger
with Rei and indulging in this sudden fascination.
"It is hope. Or at least that is what I thought. But now
it's almost gone, banished by you and your selfishness. Why did
you do it, Sohryu? Why? You were so close!" Rei's eyes gleamed
again, and Asuka swore she could feel the angry stare through her
back.
"I don't know what you are talking about! You haven't
explained anything to me! Hell, why should you! These are
nothing but nightmares. They don't mean anything." Asuka
stubbornly crossed her arms, then moved further into the small
stream of light.
"You are wrong, Sohryu. When you wake, that is the true
nightmare. Look," Rei began again, realizing she wasn't making
much of an impact with Asuka. "How do you feel, now, while in the
light? And think a moment before you answer. What is the experience
truly like?"
Asuka huffed in agitation, but proceeded to close her eyes
and concentrate. She sat motionless for a moment, allowing the
light to play off her chest. "I feel.... I feel warm," she began.
"It's like I want to be here forever, luxuriating in it. I feel
wanted, needed, almost as if there's nothing to fear any more." Asuka's
eyes snapped open. "But that's stupid. I know better. I've learned
better."
"No," Rei quickly countered, feeling as if the battle were
slipping away from her at an even faster pace. "It is not stupid.
You can have that feeling, Sohryu. You can claim it in the world
that is so dark for you now."
"I don't like being lied to," Asuka snarled, beginning to seethe
again.
"I am not lying. You began the journey earlier. Truly you did.
But now, now you're lost again, and you must pull yourself back.
Quickly, Sohryu, before it is too late."
"I'll live my life however I damn well please, Wondergirl. So,
from now on, you can just keep your nose out of it."
"It's not just about you!" Rei exploded. "I need to be free,
Sohryu! I've reached my limit! I can no longer survive in this
prison you've staked me to!"
"What?" Asuka gasped, spinning back around to face Rei. She
was too late, though. Rei had disappeared once again.
* * *
"So, Shinji," Asuka questioned him, a sickeningly sweet smile
twisting her lips, "how does it feel to be helpless?"
Shinji tried to sink further into his bench, hoping that the
dim light of the train car would somehow fail to illuminate him.
Perhaps then Asuka would leave him alone. She had been here, with
him, for hours it seemed, prattling on and on about him, and his
current blindness. He had tried once to run from her, but found
that both ends of the car were locked. There was no escape. He was
utterly at Asuka's mercy.
"I'm not useless," Shinji weakly offered in his defense.
"Oh, of course you are," Asuka countered merrily. "How could
you be anything but, when I have to lead the poor little blind boy
from A to B to C, just so he can accomplish a simple task like
cooking breakfast. I mean, good lord, talk about self delusion, Shinji.
You're good for nothing now. Face up to it."
Shinji buried his face in his hands, and tried to find something
within him that would spur him on to fight back. He searched for anything,
something that could save him. Perhaps he could mention that she didn't
exactly lead him, but more spurred him into action? No, that wouldn't
work. Asuka would have an answer for anything he said. She always did.
He was beaten, well and truly.
Maybe, then, he was actually worthless. Maybe he had no redeeming
value left. Maybe it was time for him to move on, to keep from being a
burden to the people he cared about. Maybe....
Shinji's thoughts were interrupted by the sharp sound of flesh
striking flesh. His head flew from his hands, and his eyes snapped
open. Standing in front of Asuka was a very angry looking Misato,
arm held out in the follow through of a strike.
The red and purple welt that was quickly rising on Asuka's
cheek seemed to envelope and distort her young body. Shinji watched,
enraptured, as her now fuzzy limbs and torso elongated, and her mane
of hair shortened to a mop. When finally the body that sat opposite
him returned to clear focus, Asuka was no longer there. Instead, Yui
Ikari stared back at her son, a hand clamped firmly to the spreading
injury on her cheek.
"Glad you finally decided to show him who was behind all this,"
Misato stated, smiling in victory.
"Shinji," Yui calmly said, ignoring the major, "we need to talk
alone. Could you tell your friend to leave please?"
"Mother, I...." Shinji wasn't sure what was happening. First
Asuka....oh God, Asuka....for so long, just sitting there, tearing him
to pieces. Then all the sudden there was Misato, and now his....his
mother. His mother. HIS mother!
"Misato, do you think you could leave us alone for a few minutes?
It's been so long since I've seen her," Shinji asked, choked tears
springing from his eyes.
Yui smiled politely, pleased at the request, while Misato
gaped in shock.
"No," Misato countered adamantly. "I won't leave you
alone."
"Misato, please?" Shinji looked pleadingly at her.
"Damnit, Shinji, you don't understand. You can't listen to
anything she tells you. You mustn't accept her lies!"
"Shinji, dear," Yui interjected, gracefully leaning forward
on her knees. "If you don't want her here, she can't stay. You
have the power to make sure of that."
Misato waved her arms widely, trying to distract his attention.
"No, Shinji. Don't do this. Do not listen to her!"
"Misato," Shinji stated. "Please leave, for now."
Suddenly a great gust of wind thrust itself through the train
car, pulling Misato with it, and throwing her through the now open
door at its end. She tried to cry out a last warning, but her voice
was swallowed by the howling and whipping of the gale. When her last
stretching fingertip slipped through the door, its great metal bulk
swung shut.
"Very good," Yui stated, very much pleased with the display.
"Now, listen to me, Shinji. We have much to discuss about your
current situation."
As she began to speak, neither of them noticed the far door
creak open a fraction, its lock bolt having missed the proper
clasp.
* * *
Asuka stumbled out of her bedroom, a cold sweat awash on her
skin. She fell against the hallway's wall, and slid shakily to the
floor. God, they wouldn't stop. Why couldn't they stop?
"Asuka?"
Her head snapped up, eyes opening wide in the heavy darkness.
Crouched against the opposite wall was Shinji, curled up in something
of a protective ball. Asuka simply stared at him for a moment, noting
the vulnerability of his position and tone of voice.
"Nightmares?" she finally asked, her own voice barely rising above a
whisper.
"Nightmares," Shinji confirmed in equal quiet. "You?"
"Yeah," Asuka said, pulling herself into a similar position as Shinji.
"Nightmares."
Neither of the children even twitched when the phone began
to softly buzz.
* * *
Beep.
"Katsuragi. It's me. I'm going to have to take a rain check on
that date we had planned. Something's come up, and I'm leaving for Germany
early this morning. Don't worry, I'll tell you all about it when I get back.
Well, that, and you can show me how much you missed me.
Anyway, wait to hear about my trip, before you starting planning anything on
your own. I'll talk to you later, then, Katsuragi.
Oh, one more thing. Talk to As...."
Click.
The answering machine shut off.
[End Part four]
End Notes:
I'd just like to take this opportunity to thank my pre-readers: Axel Terizaki, Misti
Ikari, Kyo Tetsuei, Skull_Leader, and Sebastian. As always they, have proved
an enormous help in the writing of this fic. Round of applause for them, please.