This chapter is short because I have the flu, and I figured you guys didn't
want to wait three more days before an update.
I'm honestly flattered by how many of you guys are enjoying my story. Well, without further ado.
I promise I will explain everything in my final author's notes, I wanted everything to move fast at the end.
It is Crouch Jr. which Harry sees during the battle, and no it's wasn't Crouch who jumped between Harry and Luna's killing curse. It was just unanimous Death Eater who moved into the wrong place at the wrong time. Another demonstration of how fate is on Harry's side.
If you look at the chapter the Art of Eavesdropping, you'll understand where Crouch came from. Crouch is laying in a bed somewhere, soulless, but still alive. I believe Snape is using Polyjuice Potion, and disguising himself at Crouch Jr. to break into Voldemort's inner circle. (Just a theory)
read and review
nothing is my own
********************************************************
Chapter Forty-Two: Perils of the Unknown
The sun light burned through the shallow eyelids of Harry's eyes as his head ached. He cracked his eyes awake looking around the crowded hospital wing.
"Thank heavens Mr. Potter, I was beginning to wonder if you planning on joining us again," Madame Pomfrey fussed, rushing over to his side.
Harry reached for his glasses, which as he predicted were on the night table beside his bed. As the scene slowly came into focus his heart constricted in his chest. So many beds were filled, with student with blank looks etched on their faces.
"Oh my," Harry started but trailed off as he searched the room with his eyes.
Madame Pomfrey's eyes were heavy and dark as she forced a smile upon him, "it was terrible Mr. Potter. I'm not sure we'll be able to save any of them."
He had seen those blank looks before, the look of the victims of the Dementor's kiss.
"How many," Harry barely managed to choke out.
"Twenty-six," said a strong grandfatherly voice, who was suddenly sitting next to Harry.
"I'm afraid we underestimated how desperate Voldemort was, and we didn't have enough warning of this attack. We knew it was likely to occur, but never at this magnitude," Dumbledore said solely with a sadness deep in his voice.
"How many killed?" Harry asked, although he knew he didn't want to know.
"Only five Aurors or Order members were actually killed, add that to the twenty-six Dementor victims. We captured several Death Eaters, including Peter Pettigrew," Dumbledore answered honestly.
Harry felt his stomach sink, "I lied to Voldemort about the prophecy."
Dumbledore nodded his head, "I know Harry, that is why I am here at your bedside. I insisted to myself that I be present when you awake, as we have many things to discuss."
"Is everyone okay, I suppose I was knocked out," Harry said slowly, trying to piece together in the foggy memory in his head.
Dumbledore sighed, "I wish I was the bearer of better news. Mr. Dennis Creevy was killed by the killing curse, as you may remember. Miss Chang is still recovering, she was hit by a very powerful hex. I'm afraid the fate for you friend Luna is far worse."
"Luna turned," Harry said hatefully, as his memories came rushing back.
Dumbledore nodded, "we mustn't give up on her yet. Sometimes it takes guidance and love to turn one back on the path of good."
Harry bit his lip, "perhaps Voldemort is right, there is no good or evil."
"Ah, but he isn't. Voldemort wishes to believe how he believes because he doesn't want the burden of the consequences of his actions on his conscience. His most prized quality will be his undoing."
Harry took a deep breath, "I can't do it sir. I can't beat him."
Dumbledore smiled, "you will though, when you're ready."
"Mr. Pettigrew has requested a word with you. I think it is wise if you speak to him, and listen to what he has to say. Maybe in his words, you can find what you are so desperately searching for," Dumbledore continued.
"I've been given an impossible task. Every time I turn around someone around me is being killed or worse!" Harry spat, feeling the anger rise in him at the mention of Pettigrew's name.
"You are searching Harry. You are searching for a meaning to all of this, but there isn't an answer or an explanation. It just is. Prophecies are never wrong, but seldom tell us the whole truth. You have been given a choice, the same choice Tom Riddle made when he was your age. Your decision will shape your course. I believe Voldemort will tempt you to his side, and you Harry must be ready to make a choice. Are you willing to sacrifice everything dear to you for what you believe in your heart to be right, or are you willing to forget what your heart tells you," Dumbledore continued, "Tom is right about one thing. There is no good or evil, there is only power, but how we choose to use that power defines us."
Harry sighed, "Dennis Creevy is dead because of me. Cedric Diggory is dead because of me, and Sirius is dead because of me. How am I suppose to carry on when I don't even know what my heart believes anymore."
Dumbledore laughed lightly, "you know the answer to that already. You've always known. I remember your father asking me a similar question when he was in his sixth year. He had his heart set on a certain young lady, and one day he asked me why we carry on when the task before us seems impossible. You know what I told him?"
Harry shook his head.
"I told him we carry on, because we don't know any other course to follow. I can not tell you the outcome of this war we are now fighting. I can not predict who will live and who will die. All I know is that the course of history will complete itself, and things will go on. The great forces that guide our would will once again come to order, and our story will become legend. All we can do is live Harry, we have no other choice."
"I feel so numb. I wish it was over," Harry muttered miserably as he stared at the cold stone wall before him, his emotions confused and torn. His green eyes clouded with tears.
"We all wish for the same resolution. It is our choice that define us Harry, you mustn't give up, if you give up, than Voldemort has already won," Dumledore said sternly.
Harry felt tears streaming down his face, "I don't understand my purpose. Why is my life so cursed! What did I do to deserve such a fate!"
"What one man sees as a curse, another man sees as a gift. I do not know the answer to your questions, it is one of the perils of the unknown."
"Why did you keep things from me this year!" Harry finally yelled losing control of his temper.
Dumbledore's smile faded, "that is your point of view. I could ask you the same question. Why did you not come to me when Luna introduced you to the Torto Scripture? Why did you not come to me when Miss Chang started losing herself? Why did you not just ask for my advice."
"I tired, you were never there!" Harry argued.
"I told you once, not long ago. I will always be there, for those who need me. Voldemort caught me off guard, and I did not anticipate such a bold attack. If I had known where his desperation would lead him, I would have never lowered my defenses."
"How did he get past the charms you and Professor Flitwick set?" Harry asked.
"Harry, the greatest lesson a wizard can learn, is no charm is full proof. A lesson I forgot," the Head Master admitted lowering his head. "I just pray the fate of this school does not depend on my failure to protect it."
Dumbledore rose from his seat, "I believe a heirloom of yours resides in my office. I will make certain that the Office for the Underage Use of Magic is aware you will be using it this summer. Remember those who have fallen by what they have done, not by what they left undone."
There were so many blank faces, if Hogwarts wasn't safe, was anywhere?
He smashed his head back into his pillow, his face crunched with disgust. He knew what Madame Pomfrey had meant by she didn't know if they could save any of them. The Dementors had taken their souls, there wasn't any getting them back. Their fate, was one worse than death.
"Harry!" he heard the ecstatic voice of Hermione call as he saw her and Ron rushing past the taken hospital beds.
Harry swallowed hard to clear his throat, but he couldn't find his voice. He felt so much rage as his tears streamed down his face, he didn't even bother to wipe them off .
"Madame Pomfrey just told us you were awake," Ron said softly, not allowing himself to focus on those vacant faces around them.
"I should have died," Harry finally stammered out, "it's never going to stop."
Even Hermione couldn't find the words to say as Harry's eyes pierced the ceiling.
"We weren't the only ones who fought back," Hermione finally whispered, "I seriously doubt Voldemort is going to try an attack like that again."
"Why, did too many of his precious Death Eaters get kissed by his Dementors?" Harry spat hatefully.
"Harry, you've got to look on the bright side. We won, he didn't take the school," Ron tried to explain.
"You guys don't get it do you? He didn't want to take the school, he wanted to prove he wasn't afraid of Dumbledore, that he could attack him where everyone thought Dumbledore was the strongest. He proved his point," Harry argued back.
Hermione lowered her head, conceding that Harry was right, but never vocally admitting it.
"You didn't see them duel, Voldemort and Dumbledore. They knew more magic than I even knew existed," Harry continued, "I lied to Voldemort, and Dennis Creevy is dead because of that lie."
"Dennis Creevy is dead because Voldemort killed him, not you," Hermione replied forcefully.
"NO!" Harry yelled, "Dennis is dead because I told Voldemort that the prophecy said that he could not live if I died, but I lied! It says neither can live while the other survives!"
Hermione gasped, as Ron sat motionless.
"I'M THE ONE WITH THE POWER TO DESTORY HIM. I WAS MARKED HIS EQUAL! I HAVE THE SOME POWER HE DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT! I EITHER HAVE TO KILL HIM OR HE'S GOING TO KILL ME!" Harry shrilled, finally letting everything he had held in for so long come out.
"IT'S MY FAULT SIRIUS IS DEAD, BECAUSE YOU TWO WERE RIGHT. I ALWAYS HAVE TO PLAY THE HERO! IF I HADN'T TOLD EVERYONE TO MEET BACK IN THE ROOM OF REQUIREMENTS, IF I HADN'T LET YOU FORCE ME BACK INTO STARTING THE DA, IF I HADN'T PLAYED THE DAMN HERO AGAIN, NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED. IF I HAD JUST TOLD DUMBLEDORE."
"Mate, you are one of the bravest people I've ever known. I'd follow you even if you weren't leading me anywhere," Ron suddenly said, not letting his eyes blink as he spoke.
"Me too," Hermione whispered.
"Well, you shouldn't" Harry quivered as tears continued to stream down his face.
Hermione smiled as she grabbed Harry's hand and squeezed it, "do you realize if it wasn't for you, how many more of us would have died? Student rose against things they were terrified of. Neville, look what you've done for Neville? Do you think Cho would be as brave as she was, if it wasn't for you?"
"What about Ginny? If it wasn't for you Harry, Ginny would be dead," Ron added.
"And don't forget December O'Riley," chimed in a third voice causing the trio to jerk their heads up.
"Feeling better?" Professor O'Riley inquired, her arm fastened tightly in a sling.
"Alright," Harry mouth quietly observing her injuries.
She smiled and looked over at Hermione and Ron, "would you two mind giving me and Harry a moment?"
"No professor," Hermione replied, grabbing Ron by the arm as she drug him out behind her.
"I owe you thank-you," she said sincerely taking a seat next to his bed.
Harry watched her nervously, remembering vaguely what she had said as she had resurfaced from the veil.
Her swollen eyes told a story of pain and loss as she visibly fought back tears, "I saw him you know. He wanted me to tell you to quit mopping, because you have a Dark Lord to defeat."
"Sirius?" Harry choked out.
She nodded confirming his guess, "Remus told me how close you two grew. It doesn't surprise me, you couldn't wedge a stick between him and James."
"Have you seen Wormtail?" Harry continued, watching her reaction carefully.
She sighed, "no, Remus has spoken with him, but I can't face him. You really can't blame him for what happened, he was always so nervous and afraid of being left out. I'm guessing when the Marauders starting growing apart, he needed someone else to hide behind," she wiped a few tears from her face, "I've blamed him for a long time. I blamed him for Beth's death, I blamed him James and Lily, for Sirius. The one I should be blaming is myself, because I could have saved them all, if I had only opened my eyes."
"Wormtail is a traitor," Harry hissed, shocked by her defense of him.
"I'm not saying what he did was right Harry, but it isn't all his fault. I wish I had just opened my eyes, it wasn't Peter that betrayed us first, it was Dreamy, Dreamy Johnston Lovegood. Luna's mother," she said softly.
"I'm not following you professor," Harry confessed.
December let out a chuckle, "Dreamy, was our tagalong. I was especially mean to her, trying to ditch her in the hallways, hiding her things, laughing at her. I should have known she'd be the first to turn. I couldn't figure out why she latched on to Peter, but I guess it makes perfect sense. He was the weakest one out of his friends, and the most vulnerable."
Harry shook his head, "I'm still not following you, why are you telling me all this?"
"Because there are something you need to understand before you look into your parents pensive. When you're are young, you do some foolish things. Me and your Godfather had a relationship, once," she stopped as if she was looking for the words to say, "I guess you could say I came between Sirius and Remus's friendship, and it gave Dreamy the opportunity to steal Peter's soul. She prey on his fears, and we were all to caught up in our own lives to even notice."
"Did he tell Remus this?" Harry inquired.
She nodded lightly, as if she was thinking about a forgotten memory.
"HE'S LIEING!" Harry shouted, feeling an overwhelming sense of anger sweep through him.
"Perhaps, but reflecting back on everything that's happened, I don't think he is. Dreamy was always obsessed with death, it took her life. She was obsessed with death because she wanted to bring Voldemort back, or maybe she was trying to bring back Peter. When she died both were thought to be dead," Professor O'Riley rambled. "I'm asking for your forgiveness ahead of time. There are some things in that small bowl, that I should have looked at before I did. The key to Sirius's innocence is in that bowl, and I waited fifteen years before looking into it."
"That's why his names been cleared, you found proof?" Harry asked suddenly, as the pieced came crashing down.
"Forgive me Harry, if I had known." she took a deep breath, "he was the obvious suspect, everyone knew he was James and Lily's secret keeper, I was even there the day he drank the potion. I never in a million years would have thought that they would pick Peter over me, if they had decided to change."
"You sentenced him to Azkaban! You knew him and yet you still didn't believe him?" Harry said angrily.
December bowed her head, "it was a darker time then Harry, I didn't know who to trust. Regardless what you believe, I love your God Father deeply, and I would never have wanted to see him suffer as he did in Azkaban. I honestly didn't know, and I was afraid to face the truth. I was afraid that the pensive would confirm my worst fears, that Sirius killed them."
"But he didn't," Harry countered, wishing he could make her disappear.
"I know, but I can't do anything to change the past," she took another deep breath.
"I'm sure you've heard that classes have been cancelled the rest of term, and I'm going back to the Auror academy," Professor O'Riley stated in an announcement. "It's going to be a bloody war I'm Harry, and we're going to need Aurors to fight it."
"So you're leaving?" Harry affirmed.
She nodded again, "yes, I'm heading back to go though applications for the summer class. Professor McGonagall tells me you wish you be an Auror."
"I did," Harry said, as if he might have changed his mind.
"Well, I'll keep my eye out for your name in next years batch. Your mother would have been so proud of the person you've become," she forced a smile, before leaving his bedside.
The position had to be cursed, he had never had a complete year of Defense Against the Dark Arts, the teachers just kept leaving. One dead, one who didn't even know who he was, one was a werewolf, one an imposter, one a incompetent idiot and one who was rushing off to fight a war he started.
I'm honestly flattered by how many of you guys are enjoying my story. Well, without further ado.
I promise I will explain everything in my final author's notes, I wanted everything to move fast at the end.
It is Crouch Jr. which Harry sees during the battle, and no it's wasn't Crouch who jumped between Harry and Luna's killing curse. It was just unanimous Death Eater who moved into the wrong place at the wrong time. Another demonstration of how fate is on Harry's side.
If you look at the chapter the Art of Eavesdropping, you'll understand where Crouch came from. Crouch is laying in a bed somewhere, soulless, but still alive. I believe Snape is using Polyjuice Potion, and disguising himself at Crouch Jr. to break into Voldemort's inner circle. (Just a theory)
read and review
nothing is my own
********************************************************
Chapter Forty-Two: Perils of the Unknown
The sun light burned through the shallow eyelids of Harry's eyes as his head ached. He cracked his eyes awake looking around the crowded hospital wing.
"Thank heavens Mr. Potter, I was beginning to wonder if you planning on joining us again," Madame Pomfrey fussed, rushing over to his side.
Harry reached for his glasses, which as he predicted were on the night table beside his bed. As the scene slowly came into focus his heart constricted in his chest. So many beds were filled, with student with blank looks etched on their faces.
"Oh my," Harry started but trailed off as he searched the room with his eyes.
Madame Pomfrey's eyes were heavy and dark as she forced a smile upon him, "it was terrible Mr. Potter. I'm not sure we'll be able to save any of them."
He had seen those blank looks before, the look of the victims of the Dementor's kiss.
"How many," Harry barely managed to choke out.
"Twenty-six," said a strong grandfatherly voice, who was suddenly sitting next to Harry.
"I'm afraid we underestimated how desperate Voldemort was, and we didn't have enough warning of this attack. We knew it was likely to occur, but never at this magnitude," Dumbledore said solely with a sadness deep in his voice.
"How many killed?" Harry asked, although he knew he didn't want to know.
"Only five Aurors or Order members were actually killed, add that to the twenty-six Dementor victims. We captured several Death Eaters, including Peter Pettigrew," Dumbledore answered honestly.
Harry felt his stomach sink, "I lied to Voldemort about the prophecy."
Dumbledore nodded his head, "I know Harry, that is why I am here at your bedside. I insisted to myself that I be present when you awake, as we have many things to discuss."
"Is everyone okay, I suppose I was knocked out," Harry said slowly, trying to piece together in the foggy memory in his head.
Dumbledore sighed, "I wish I was the bearer of better news. Mr. Dennis Creevy was killed by the killing curse, as you may remember. Miss Chang is still recovering, she was hit by a very powerful hex. I'm afraid the fate for you friend Luna is far worse."
"Luna turned," Harry said hatefully, as his memories came rushing back.
Dumbledore nodded, "we mustn't give up on her yet. Sometimes it takes guidance and love to turn one back on the path of good."
Harry bit his lip, "perhaps Voldemort is right, there is no good or evil."
"Ah, but he isn't. Voldemort wishes to believe how he believes because he doesn't want the burden of the consequences of his actions on his conscience. His most prized quality will be his undoing."
Harry took a deep breath, "I can't do it sir. I can't beat him."
Dumbledore smiled, "you will though, when you're ready."
"Mr. Pettigrew has requested a word with you. I think it is wise if you speak to him, and listen to what he has to say. Maybe in his words, you can find what you are so desperately searching for," Dumbledore continued.
"I've been given an impossible task. Every time I turn around someone around me is being killed or worse!" Harry spat, feeling the anger rise in him at the mention of Pettigrew's name.
"You are searching Harry. You are searching for a meaning to all of this, but there isn't an answer or an explanation. It just is. Prophecies are never wrong, but seldom tell us the whole truth. You have been given a choice, the same choice Tom Riddle made when he was your age. Your decision will shape your course. I believe Voldemort will tempt you to his side, and you Harry must be ready to make a choice. Are you willing to sacrifice everything dear to you for what you believe in your heart to be right, or are you willing to forget what your heart tells you," Dumbledore continued, "Tom is right about one thing. There is no good or evil, there is only power, but how we choose to use that power defines us."
Harry sighed, "Dennis Creevy is dead because of me. Cedric Diggory is dead because of me, and Sirius is dead because of me. How am I suppose to carry on when I don't even know what my heart believes anymore."
Dumbledore laughed lightly, "you know the answer to that already. You've always known. I remember your father asking me a similar question when he was in his sixth year. He had his heart set on a certain young lady, and one day he asked me why we carry on when the task before us seems impossible. You know what I told him?"
Harry shook his head.
"I told him we carry on, because we don't know any other course to follow. I can not tell you the outcome of this war we are now fighting. I can not predict who will live and who will die. All I know is that the course of history will complete itself, and things will go on. The great forces that guide our would will once again come to order, and our story will become legend. All we can do is live Harry, we have no other choice."
"I feel so numb. I wish it was over," Harry muttered miserably as he stared at the cold stone wall before him, his emotions confused and torn. His green eyes clouded with tears.
"We all wish for the same resolution. It is our choice that define us Harry, you mustn't give up, if you give up, than Voldemort has already won," Dumledore said sternly.
Harry felt tears streaming down his face, "I don't understand my purpose. Why is my life so cursed! What did I do to deserve such a fate!"
"What one man sees as a curse, another man sees as a gift. I do not know the answer to your questions, it is one of the perils of the unknown."
"Why did you keep things from me this year!" Harry finally yelled losing control of his temper.
Dumbledore's smile faded, "that is your point of view. I could ask you the same question. Why did you not come to me when Luna introduced you to the Torto Scripture? Why did you not come to me when Miss Chang started losing herself? Why did you not just ask for my advice."
"I tired, you were never there!" Harry argued.
"I told you once, not long ago. I will always be there, for those who need me. Voldemort caught me off guard, and I did not anticipate such a bold attack. If I had known where his desperation would lead him, I would have never lowered my defenses."
"How did he get past the charms you and Professor Flitwick set?" Harry asked.
"Harry, the greatest lesson a wizard can learn, is no charm is full proof. A lesson I forgot," the Head Master admitted lowering his head. "I just pray the fate of this school does not depend on my failure to protect it."
Dumbledore rose from his seat, "I believe a heirloom of yours resides in my office. I will make certain that the Office for the Underage Use of Magic is aware you will be using it this summer. Remember those who have fallen by what they have done, not by what they left undone."
There were so many blank faces, if Hogwarts wasn't safe, was anywhere?
He smashed his head back into his pillow, his face crunched with disgust. He knew what Madame Pomfrey had meant by she didn't know if they could save any of them. The Dementors had taken their souls, there wasn't any getting them back. Their fate, was one worse than death.
"Harry!" he heard the ecstatic voice of Hermione call as he saw her and Ron rushing past the taken hospital beds.
Harry swallowed hard to clear his throat, but he couldn't find his voice. He felt so much rage as his tears streamed down his face, he didn't even bother to wipe them off .
"Madame Pomfrey just told us you were awake," Ron said softly, not allowing himself to focus on those vacant faces around them.
"I should have died," Harry finally stammered out, "it's never going to stop."
Even Hermione couldn't find the words to say as Harry's eyes pierced the ceiling.
"We weren't the only ones who fought back," Hermione finally whispered, "I seriously doubt Voldemort is going to try an attack like that again."
"Why, did too many of his precious Death Eaters get kissed by his Dementors?" Harry spat hatefully.
"Harry, you've got to look on the bright side. We won, he didn't take the school," Ron tried to explain.
"You guys don't get it do you? He didn't want to take the school, he wanted to prove he wasn't afraid of Dumbledore, that he could attack him where everyone thought Dumbledore was the strongest. He proved his point," Harry argued back.
Hermione lowered her head, conceding that Harry was right, but never vocally admitting it.
"You didn't see them duel, Voldemort and Dumbledore. They knew more magic than I even knew existed," Harry continued, "I lied to Voldemort, and Dennis Creevy is dead because of that lie."
"Dennis Creevy is dead because Voldemort killed him, not you," Hermione replied forcefully.
"NO!" Harry yelled, "Dennis is dead because I told Voldemort that the prophecy said that he could not live if I died, but I lied! It says neither can live while the other survives!"
Hermione gasped, as Ron sat motionless.
"I'M THE ONE WITH THE POWER TO DESTORY HIM. I WAS MARKED HIS EQUAL! I HAVE THE SOME POWER HE DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT! I EITHER HAVE TO KILL HIM OR HE'S GOING TO KILL ME!" Harry shrilled, finally letting everything he had held in for so long come out.
"IT'S MY FAULT SIRIUS IS DEAD, BECAUSE YOU TWO WERE RIGHT. I ALWAYS HAVE TO PLAY THE HERO! IF I HADN'T TOLD EVERYONE TO MEET BACK IN THE ROOM OF REQUIREMENTS, IF I HADN'T LET YOU FORCE ME BACK INTO STARTING THE DA, IF I HADN'T PLAYED THE DAMN HERO AGAIN, NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED. IF I HAD JUST TOLD DUMBLEDORE."
"Mate, you are one of the bravest people I've ever known. I'd follow you even if you weren't leading me anywhere," Ron suddenly said, not letting his eyes blink as he spoke.
"Me too," Hermione whispered.
"Well, you shouldn't" Harry quivered as tears continued to stream down his face.
Hermione smiled as she grabbed Harry's hand and squeezed it, "do you realize if it wasn't for you, how many more of us would have died? Student rose against things they were terrified of. Neville, look what you've done for Neville? Do you think Cho would be as brave as she was, if it wasn't for you?"
"What about Ginny? If it wasn't for you Harry, Ginny would be dead," Ron added.
"And don't forget December O'Riley," chimed in a third voice causing the trio to jerk their heads up.
"Feeling better?" Professor O'Riley inquired, her arm fastened tightly in a sling.
"Alright," Harry mouth quietly observing her injuries.
She smiled and looked over at Hermione and Ron, "would you two mind giving me and Harry a moment?"
"No professor," Hermione replied, grabbing Ron by the arm as she drug him out behind her.
"I owe you thank-you," she said sincerely taking a seat next to his bed.
Harry watched her nervously, remembering vaguely what she had said as she had resurfaced from the veil.
Her swollen eyes told a story of pain and loss as she visibly fought back tears, "I saw him you know. He wanted me to tell you to quit mopping, because you have a Dark Lord to defeat."
"Sirius?" Harry choked out.
She nodded confirming his guess, "Remus told me how close you two grew. It doesn't surprise me, you couldn't wedge a stick between him and James."
"Have you seen Wormtail?" Harry continued, watching her reaction carefully.
She sighed, "no, Remus has spoken with him, but I can't face him. You really can't blame him for what happened, he was always so nervous and afraid of being left out. I'm guessing when the Marauders starting growing apart, he needed someone else to hide behind," she wiped a few tears from her face, "I've blamed him for a long time. I blamed him for Beth's death, I blamed him James and Lily, for Sirius. The one I should be blaming is myself, because I could have saved them all, if I had only opened my eyes."
"Wormtail is a traitor," Harry hissed, shocked by her defense of him.
"I'm not saying what he did was right Harry, but it isn't all his fault. I wish I had just opened my eyes, it wasn't Peter that betrayed us first, it was Dreamy, Dreamy Johnston Lovegood. Luna's mother," she said softly.
"I'm not following you professor," Harry confessed.
December let out a chuckle, "Dreamy, was our tagalong. I was especially mean to her, trying to ditch her in the hallways, hiding her things, laughing at her. I should have known she'd be the first to turn. I couldn't figure out why she latched on to Peter, but I guess it makes perfect sense. He was the weakest one out of his friends, and the most vulnerable."
Harry shook his head, "I'm still not following you, why are you telling me all this?"
"Because there are something you need to understand before you look into your parents pensive. When you're are young, you do some foolish things. Me and your Godfather had a relationship, once," she stopped as if she was looking for the words to say, "I guess you could say I came between Sirius and Remus's friendship, and it gave Dreamy the opportunity to steal Peter's soul. She prey on his fears, and we were all to caught up in our own lives to even notice."
"Did he tell Remus this?" Harry inquired.
She nodded lightly, as if she was thinking about a forgotten memory.
"HE'S LIEING!" Harry shouted, feeling an overwhelming sense of anger sweep through him.
"Perhaps, but reflecting back on everything that's happened, I don't think he is. Dreamy was always obsessed with death, it took her life. She was obsessed with death because she wanted to bring Voldemort back, or maybe she was trying to bring back Peter. When she died both were thought to be dead," Professor O'Riley rambled. "I'm asking for your forgiveness ahead of time. There are some things in that small bowl, that I should have looked at before I did. The key to Sirius's innocence is in that bowl, and I waited fifteen years before looking into it."
"That's why his names been cleared, you found proof?" Harry asked suddenly, as the pieced came crashing down.
"Forgive me Harry, if I had known." she took a deep breath, "he was the obvious suspect, everyone knew he was James and Lily's secret keeper, I was even there the day he drank the potion. I never in a million years would have thought that they would pick Peter over me, if they had decided to change."
"You sentenced him to Azkaban! You knew him and yet you still didn't believe him?" Harry said angrily.
December bowed her head, "it was a darker time then Harry, I didn't know who to trust. Regardless what you believe, I love your God Father deeply, and I would never have wanted to see him suffer as he did in Azkaban. I honestly didn't know, and I was afraid to face the truth. I was afraid that the pensive would confirm my worst fears, that Sirius killed them."
"But he didn't," Harry countered, wishing he could make her disappear.
"I know, but I can't do anything to change the past," she took another deep breath.
"I'm sure you've heard that classes have been cancelled the rest of term, and I'm going back to the Auror academy," Professor O'Riley stated in an announcement. "It's going to be a bloody war I'm Harry, and we're going to need Aurors to fight it."
"So you're leaving?" Harry affirmed.
She nodded again, "yes, I'm heading back to go though applications for the summer class. Professor McGonagall tells me you wish you be an Auror."
"I did," Harry said, as if he might have changed his mind.
"Well, I'll keep my eye out for your name in next years batch. Your mother would have been so proud of the person you've become," she forced a smile, before leaving his bedside.
The position had to be cursed, he had never had a complete year of Defense Against the Dark Arts, the teachers just kept leaving. One dead, one who didn't even know who he was, one was a werewolf, one an imposter, one a incompetent idiot and one who was rushing off to fight a war he started.