I do not own anything from Capcom. I'm a poor white guy in
California, so leave me be. 'Holy 2x4' was first said by JJ Corly as far as
I know. And Darth, yes, Sigma is stupid in this fic. He's the gayest boss
ever, and he needs to die. Permanently. And actually put some time into
your reviews dude! Typeing a one sentence blurb shows absolutely nothing.
anyway, on with the story.
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Axl was still chasing Sigma's goons. Two of them had hijacked a Mustang, while the other two were still on foot. He was tempted to have Zero help him, but as usual, he wanted to prove himself to X. He'd chase the other's down later. The two on foot were none other than Cake Fruity and Blade Saw(who looked similar to CutMan, amazingly).
"Fruit! Hurry up!" Blade yelled to his companion.
"I can't! You know how fat I am!" He complained. Fruit suddenly fell to the ground from exhaustion. "Go on without me Blade! You always were the better fighter! Besides, I'm tired of making and eating cake!"
"Never! We'll make a stand together! We shall defeat our oppressors!"
The two continued with the melodramatics even after Axl had caught up to them. Axl brought out his handy-dandy rocket launcher and fired at them. The rocket impacted Fruit in the face, ending his semi-evil existence.
"NOOOOO!!" Blade fell to his knees crying.
"He hit me with eggs. I don't like that." Axl still had a psychotic look in his eyes. "You hit me with eggs too. I don't like that either. What are you going to do about it?"
"Sit here and cry like a sissy?" Blade asked, almost innocently.
"Try dying." Axl fired again, destroying the Maverick. "Now to find some transportation..." Axl spied a nearby motor bike that's owner had conveniently left running. "Good enough."
------
Zero was now playing chauffeur for X and Alia, and was enjoying the privilege. Especially since now HE controlled the stereo.
"Zero, you know I hate classical. Please, can you change the station?" X was almost begging.
"Sorry X, but since I'm in the driver's seat, I control the radio. You said so yourself earlier." Zero smiled gleefully. "Besides, I still owe you for getting me wrapped up into this!" Zero hit the accelerator.
X and Alia screamed as the car accelerated past 100 MPH. "Zero! Cut that out right now, or you get the cat treatment!" Alia screamed.
"What? I can't hear you over Bach!" Zero yelled. X and Alia grabbed the cat and shoved it in Zero's lap, which turned into a scratching post for said animal. "ARG! CAT CLAWS! OW-OW-OW-OW-OW!!" The car swerved out of control, causing everyone to scream even more. Eventually, Zero regained control of the car and turned down the music. They arrived at the movie theater without any other incidents.
------
Sigma Watched in horror as videos of his men being destroyed by that confounded trio of hunters. "YOU STUPID BLUE JERK! I CAN'T EVEN TEE-PEE YOUR HOUSE WITHOUT ONE OF YOUR CRONIES SHOWING UP! GR!!!" Sigma pounded the console in front of him, causing more of his body to fall off. "You! Misc. Maverick 4,251! Come over here and fix me! And you four! You've all been promoted to level bosses as well! Get out there and wreck X's date! I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE IF IT KILLS ME!!"
The four Mavericks that had been promoted shuddered. They had all been Italian and Spanish artists before they were infected...
------
X escorted Alia into the theater. She had chosen to watch 'A walk to remember'(Hey! It was actually a good movie for a chick flick), which X was clueless about. X, having thought ahead, reserved the entire theater for just her(which had cost a lot). Only the concession stand was open, which was staffed by four strange looking Reploids.
"Hola senior! What can I do four you?" The Reploid at the cash register asked.
"We need a bucket of popcorn, and two cokes." X said, sliding them the appropriate amount of credits.
"Gracias senior. Hey Mario, Tony, get the popcorn ready!"
"We-sa gonna get on it right away, ya know?" Mario spoke in a 'god- father' accent.
Not twenty seconds later, two cokes and a bucket of popcorn were produced. X and Alia walked into the theater, not even worried in the slightest at who the Reploids were.
"Mario, did you's putta da stuff in da popcorn?" Tony asked.
"Yeah. I only got half of it inta the popcorn. We'd better split before they get too loony!" The group hurried out of the building, leaving X and Alia to their movie, and the concession stand people to their headaches.
------
Signas looked over the control room. All the support staff had failed to show up. AGAIN. "Guess I'm working alone tonight." He put his feet up on his console, pulling a random magazine out of thin air. "Gotta love fisherman's monthly."
Signas was totally zoned out when Axl burst into the command center decked out in biker attire. "Sup boss?" Signas was gazing upon the brand new GFX-473 reel, ogling over it's smooth design. Axl could have sworn he was drooling. "Oh well. Let's see, how does Alia work this thing?" He hit a few keys, and the position of every known maverick was displayed. The two he had been chasing were headed back to Sigma's new fortress. Axl grinned "Look's like Siggies got a new play-place!"
Signas, suddenly shaken out of his stupor, screamed. "DON'T EVER SNEAK UP ON ME LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN!"
"Hey! I said hello! You were to busy drooling to notice!" Axl walked out of the room, but not before he grabbed several weapons.
------
"Uh, Alia? Is it just me, or is Mandy Moore walking on the roof?" X asked.
"What? I could have sworn that we were watching 'A walk to remember', but it looks like a really bad bootleg of Godzilla! I mean, look! The color's are all messed up!"
X blinked, trying to re-focus. 'Must have been the bow noodles at the restaurant...' he though.
Alia's head was swimming. "Man... X, you look handsome tonight..." Her speech was slurred, but she didn't notice.
X, however, did. He performed a self scan, and found high amounts of paint in his systems. He assumed Alia was under the influence as well. To his regret, they had devoured the popcorn all to quickly. He suddenly felt like he had been hit with a holy 2 by 4. After a few minutes, his system quarantined the paint, as did Alia's. "Okay, note to self, never trust anyone who sounds like they came from 'the Godfather'."
"Amen to that..." Alia shook her head. The movie had come to a close, both of them missing it in their drugged up state. "Guess we should head to the beach."
X nodded, leading her out of the theater. Zero was nowhere to be found, having spotted two Mavericks speeding off in a mustang. He had left a note in X's car saying that he wanted them to enjoy themselves at the beach.
"How nice of him. We should thank him later!" Alia smiled, clinging to X's arm. 'It's been a really good date, with the exception of the Mavericks trying to ruin it. Maybe I should kiss him tonight!' She smiled and blushed.
"Shall we get going?" X opened her door for her.
"Sure!" Alia smiled at X, and sat in the passenger's seat. The two drove off, headed toward the beach. Unbeknownst to them, they had an extra passenger besides Alia's cat...
------
Zero was screaming down the highway on his hover cycle, in hot pursuit of a Mustang that had six occupants. All presumed to be Mavericks. Before he could catch up to them, they turned off on a exit, leaving Zero to swerve into on coming traffic and off the road to get a head start on them. He stopped after he saw where they were headed.
"Great. Sigma's playing his tricks again. EVERY SINGLE FREAKING TIME WE BEAT HIM HE DOES THIS KIND OF JUNK!" Zero shook his fist at the floating fortress. "SCREW YOU SIGMA!! ZERO'S COMING DISFIGURE YOUR FACE PERMANENTLY THIS TIME!" Axl, who had caught up to Zero by that time, yelled in agreement. "What are you doing here?"
"They attacked X's house and hit me with an egg. They die for this." Axl gritted his teeth.
"Sure. Whatever. Let's go kill some Mavericks." Zero gunned his engine, and raced off toward Sigma's fortress, closely followed by Axl. On a beach somewhere nearby, X and Alia were staring at the sunset...
------
Revenge is a sweet thing! Be sure to tune in next time for more fun with beating up Sigma and his men!
------
Axl was still chasing Sigma's goons. Two of them had hijacked a Mustang, while the other two were still on foot. He was tempted to have Zero help him, but as usual, he wanted to prove himself to X. He'd chase the other's down later. The two on foot were none other than Cake Fruity and Blade Saw(who looked similar to CutMan, amazingly).
"Fruit! Hurry up!" Blade yelled to his companion.
"I can't! You know how fat I am!" He complained. Fruit suddenly fell to the ground from exhaustion. "Go on without me Blade! You always were the better fighter! Besides, I'm tired of making and eating cake!"
"Never! We'll make a stand together! We shall defeat our oppressors!"
The two continued with the melodramatics even after Axl had caught up to them. Axl brought out his handy-dandy rocket launcher and fired at them. The rocket impacted Fruit in the face, ending his semi-evil existence.
"NOOOOO!!" Blade fell to his knees crying.
"He hit me with eggs. I don't like that." Axl still had a psychotic look in his eyes. "You hit me with eggs too. I don't like that either. What are you going to do about it?"
"Sit here and cry like a sissy?" Blade asked, almost innocently.
"Try dying." Axl fired again, destroying the Maverick. "Now to find some transportation..." Axl spied a nearby motor bike that's owner had conveniently left running. "Good enough."
------
Zero was now playing chauffeur for X and Alia, and was enjoying the privilege. Especially since now HE controlled the stereo.
"Zero, you know I hate classical. Please, can you change the station?" X was almost begging.
"Sorry X, but since I'm in the driver's seat, I control the radio. You said so yourself earlier." Zero smiled gleefully. "Besides, I still owe you for getting me wrapped up into this!" Zero hit the accelerator.
X and Alia screamed as the car accelerated past 100 MPH. "Zero! Cut that out right now, or you get the cat treatment!" Alia screamed.
"What? I can't hear you over Bach!" Zero yelled. X and Alia grabbed the cat and shoved it in Zero's lap, which turned into a scratching post for said animal. "ARG! CAT CLAWS! OW-OW-OW-OW-OW!!" The car swerved out of control, causing everyone to scream even more. Eventually, Zero regained control of the car and turned down the music. They arrived at the movie theater without any other incidents.
------
Sigma Watched in horror as videos of his men being destroyed by that confounded trio of hunters. "YOU STUPID BLUE JERK! I CAN'T EVEN TEE-PEE YOUR HOUSE WITHOUT ONE OF YOUR CRONIES SHOWING UP! GR!!!" Sigma pounded the console in front of him, causing more of his body to fall off. "You! Misc. Maverick 4,251! Come over here and fix me! And you four! You've all been promoted to level bosses as well! Get out there and wreck X's date! I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE IF IT KILLS ME!!"
The four Mavericks that had been promoted shuddered. They had all been Italian and Spanish artists before they were infected...
------
X escorted Alia into the theater. She had chosen to watch 'A walk to remember'(Hey! It was actually a good movie for a chick flick), which X was clueless about. X, having thought ahead, reserved the entire theater for just her(which had cost a lot). Only the concession stand was open, which was staffed by four strange looking Reploids.
"Hola senior! What can I do four you?" The Reploid at the cash register asked.
"We need a bucket of popcorn, and two cokes." X said, sliding them the appropriate amount of credits.
"Gracias senior. Hey Mario, Tony, get the popcorn ready!"
"We-sa gonna get on it right away, ya know?" Mario spoke in a 'god- father' accent.
Not twenty seconds later, two cokes and a bucket of popcorn were produced. X and Alia walked into the theater, not even worried in the slightest at who the Reploids were.
"Mario, did you's putta da stuff in da popcorn?" Tony asked.
"Yeah. I only got half of it inta the popcorn. We'd better split before they get too loony!" The group hurried out of the building, leaving X and Alia to their movie, and the concession stand people to their headaches.
------
Signas looked over the control room. All the support staff had failed to show up. AGAIN. "Guess I'm working alone tonight." He put his feet up on his console, pulling a random magazine out of thin air. "Gotta love fisherman's monthly."
Signas was totally zoned out when Axl burst into the command center decked out in biker attire. "Sup boss?" Signas was gazing upon the brand new GFX-473 reel, ogling over it's smooth design. Axl could have sworn he was drooling. "Oh well. Let's see, how does Alia work this thing?" He hit a few keys, and the position of every known maverick was displayed. The two he had been chasing were headed back to Sigma's new fortress. Axl grinned "Look's like Siggies got a new play-place!"
Signas, suddenly shaken out of his stupor, screamed. "DON'T EVER SNEAK UP ON ME LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN!"
"Hey! I said hello! You were to busy drooling to notice!" Axl walked out of the room, but not before he grabbed several weapons.
------
"Uh, Alia? Is it just me, or is Mandy Moore walking on the roof?" X asked.
"What? I could have sworn that we were watching 'A walk to remember', but it looks like a really bad bootleg of Godzilla! I mean, look! The color's are all messed up!"
X blinked, trying to re-focus. 'Must have been the bow noodles at the restaurant...' he though.
Alia's head was swimming. "Man... X, you look handsome tonight..." Her speech was slurred, but she didn't notice.
X, however, did. He performed a self scan, and found high amounts of paint in his systems. He assumed Alia was under the influence as well. To his regret, they had devoured the popcorn all to quickly. He suddenly felt like he had been hit with a holy 2 by 4. After a few minutes, his system quarantined the paint, as did Alia's. "Okay, note to self, never trust anyone who sounds like they came from 'the Godfather'."
"Amen to that..." Alia shook her head. The movie had come to a close, both of them missing it in their drugged up state. "Guess we should head to the beach."
X nodded, leading her out of the theater. Zero was nowhere to be found, having spotted two Mavericks speeding off in a mustang. He had left a note in X's car saying that he wanted them to enjoy themselves at the beach.
"How nice of him. We should thank him later!" Alia smiled, clinging to X's arm. 'It's been a really good date, with the exception of the Mavericks trying to ruin it. Maybe I should kiss him tonight!' She smiled and blushed.
"Shall we get going?" X opened her door for her.
"Sure!" Alia smiled at X, and sat in the passenger's seat. The two drove off, headed toward the beach. Unbeknownst to them, they had an extra passenger besides Alia's cat...
------
Zero was screaming down the highway on his hover cycle, in hot pursuit of a Mustang that had six occupants. All presumed to be Mavericks. Before he could catch up to them, they turned off on a exit, leaving Zero to swerve into on coming traffic and off the road to get a head start on them. He stopped after he saw where they were headed.
"Great. Sigma's playing his tricks again. EVERY SINGLE FREAKING TIME WE BEAT HIM HE DOES THIS KIND OF JUNK!" Zero shook his fist at the floating fortress. "SCREW YOU SIGMA!! ZERO'S COMING DISFIGURE YOUR FACE PERMANENTLY THIS TIME!" Axl, who had caught up to Zero by that time, yelled in agreement. "What are you doing here?"
"They attacked X's house and hit me with an egg. They die for this." Axl gritted his teeth.
"Sure. Whatever. Let's go kill some Mavericks." Zero gunned his engine, and raced off toward Sigma's fortress, closely followed by Axl. On a beach somewhere nearby, X and Alia were staring at the sunset...
------
Revenge is a sweet thing! Be sure to tune in next time for more fun with beating up Sigma and his men!