I walk into the apartment to the echoes of the phone. Dropping my bag and
picking up the phone in one sold movement, I take in a breath.
"Hello?"
"Hey, Riley?"
"Yeah, hi Willow."
"Hey, where's Buffy?"
"Still patrolling I guess, I just got home. Didn't you two get together today?"
"We were supposed to, I guess she got caught up."
"Guess so."
"Well, I'll see you tomorrow."
"I'll tell her you called."
"Thanks."
"Bye."
"Bye."
The dial tone rings in a monotone drone in my ear, and I draw it away slowly to set it back in the cradle. Buffy probably found a nest, or got caught up with some other Slayage deal. Apart of me wants to run back out into the silent facade of night and help her. The other part, the rational part, tells me to shrug myself out of my coat and read the paper. Or something. I have to be normal for the both of us.
Sometimes I fear that she'll get lost. Not in death, but in the kill. She'll become obsessed with the darkness and demons that she won't be able to find herself back to the light, or my arms. Which I know is a selfish thing to say, but I need her. Or maybe I just need her to need me. I'm dependent on her, and she realizes that. The one thing I don't think she realizes though, is that she's never told me she loves me.
At first I thought it was just because of the obvious. That she took for granted that I knew it, that it was as much fact as the sun coming up every day. But if there's one thing I've learned by living on the Hellmouth, it's that the sun doesn't always come up.
There's so many thing I don't know about her. I opened myself up to her like the dawn opens herself to the sky. But she stays closed, and I think that she only allows herself to be seen by the night. Then again, maybe if she showed herself to me, all I'd see is darkness. Her thoughts were beginning to be open to me, but then Dawn died, and she became more dead then the vampires she fights.
Sometimes in the back of my mind, there's a voice that whispers that she only married me because she needed something real in her life, something to fight for. It used to be Dawn, and I guess before that, because Dawn never really existed, that it was her friends. But she lost all of it. While she fought the dark she killed her friends as well. I refused to die off though, and I don't know if I'm a nuisance that won't leave or the light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm being pessimistic and paranoid. I know that.
This side only comes out when I'm left alone with my thoughts. We're married, were together, and I love her.
That thought keeps me going until she comes home.
A/N If your wondering why this is so short, it's because it's supposed to be.
"Hello?"
"Hey, Riley?"
"Yeah, hi Willow."
"Hey, where's Buffy?"
"Still patrolling I guess, I just got home. Didn't you two get together today?"
"We were supposed to, I guess she got caught up."
"Guess so."
"Well, I'll see you tomorrow."
"I'll tell her you called."
"Thanks."
"Bye."
"Bye."
The dial tone rings in a monotone drone in my ear, and I draw it away slowly to set it back in the cradle. Buffy probably found a nest, or got caught up with some other Slayage deal. Apart of me wants to run back out into the silent facade of night and help her. The other part, the rational part, tells me to shrug myself out of my coat and read the paper. Or something. I have to be normal for the both of us.
Sometimes I fear that she'll get lost. Not in death, but in the kill. She'll become obsessed with the darkness and demons that she won't be able to find herself back to the light, or my arms. Which I know is a selfish thing to say, but I need her. Or maybe I just need her to need me. I'm dependent on her, and she realizes that. The one thing I don't think she realizes though, is that she's never told me she loves me.
At first I thought it was just because of the obvious. That she took for granted that I knew it, that it was as much fact as the sun coming up every day. But if there's one thing I've learned by living on the Hellmouth, it's that the sun doesn't always come up.
There's so many thing I don't know about her. I opened myself up to her like the dawn opens herself to the sky. But she stays closed, and I think that she only allows herself to be seen by the night. Then again, maybe if she showed herself to me, all I'd see is darkness. Her thoughts were beginning to be open to me, but then Dawn died, and she became more dead then the vampires she fights.
Sometimes in the back of my mind, there's a voice that whispers that she only married me because she needed something real in her life, something to fight for. It used to be Dawn, and I guess before that, because Dawn never really existed, that it was her friends. But she lost all of it. While she fought the dark she killed her friends as well. I refused to die off though, and I don't know if I'm a nuisance that won't leave or the light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm being pessimistic and paranoid. I know that.
This side only comes out when I'm left alone with my thoughts. We're married, were together, and I love her.
That thought keeps me going until she comes home.
A/N If your wondering why this is so short, it's because it's supposed to be.