Please don't take this the wrong way. I'm not Anti-American. For Christ-
sake I was born in Ohio!
Advance Wars: WWII Crisis
Disclaimer: I do not own Advance Wars or the 2nd, and I don't own Nintendo, blah blah blah...
Chapter 1: INVASION of...
~~~In the Future~~~ (Lets just leave it there!)
Orange Star, a beautiful nation. Then all of sudden out of nowhere comes an evil army of no good villains from a country called "The Allies". Max, Andy, Sami, and Nell wake up to the sound of a Sherman Tank driving through their house, apartment...place wherever they stay.
"Holy Fu..." Andy screamed as Max covered his mouth. "Don't say that to them. Its just probably that tank just turned the wrong way. What wrong with it..."
And all of the sudden the tank fired at Max's collection of hard rock music, autographed, and hand-printed cds...yeah.
"Why that little!!!!" Max screamed with a violent anger.
"What kind of tank is that?" said Sami. "It looks so...weird"
"Yeah, I guess it is the attacking enemy....THE ENEMY IS HERE!!!!" screamed Max. "Everyone to battle positions!"
"Where is that?" asked Andy.
"Down the hall, to the left, around the corner, and there will be a chair."
"WHEEEE!" and so Andy ran off.
"What a stupid dork" Sami laughed.
"Why is he a CO again?"
"Homeless, mentally insane, mentally unstable, threatened me with a gun, and..." Nell said.
"Yeah I get the point."
(In the distant background...)
"Weeeeeee! This is fun! How'd we get here anyway. Where's them Nazi's! I want to kill em!! This is gonna be fun!"
"Hold your pants, Patton! We'll be killing in awhile. And first we don't want to be killin Nazi's. We want to kill these innocent people that threaten us! And plus German generals are our friends. Right Rommel?"
"Yesh! We kill sem! German general be nice to nice USA and thy Britain" said Erwin Rommel in his illiterate English.
"Montgomery your always right. Except for Market Garden! HAHAHAH!" yelled Patton.
"Ohhh Shut up!" squealed Montgomery. "It would of work, if we wasn't using them stupid US infantry!"
"If yud were smart, yud find out that thy British infauntry was thy mistake" said Rommel.
"Oh you little German bastard!"
"Tehehehe!" laughed Rommel.
A random Orange star civilian comes up to Rommel and says, "Vo sind die toiletten?" (Where are the toilets?)
Patton takes out a pistol and shoots the dude in the head. "You're dead. You don't need a freakin toilet!" A very long pause. "Ohhh yes! Advance all units. Isn't that the name of the game? 'Advance Wars."
They all sigh.
Next chapter... CHAPTER 2: ...And so they attacked...With the Desert FOX!
~~And until next time! So long, hope you shitted in your pants because you thought this was funny. Because it was stupid. Except for...THE DESERT FOX or (THE Illiterate DESERT FOX) Bye guys. Please Review; I would like some...constructive criticism. Whatever that means.
Advance Wars: WWII Crisis
Disclaimer: I do not own Advance Wars or the 2nd, and I don't own Nintendo, blah blah blah...
Chapter 1: INVASION of...
~~~In the Future~~~ (Lets just leave it there!)
Orange Star, a beautiful nation. Then all of sudden out of nowhere comes an evil army of no good villains from a country called "The Allies". Max, Andy, Sami, and Nell wake up to the sound of a Sherman Tank driving through their house, apartment...place wherever they stay.
"Holy Fu..." Andy screamed as Max covered his mouth. "Don't say that to them. Its just probably that tank just turned the wrong way. What wrong with it..."
And all of the sudden the tank fired at Max's collection of hard rock music, autographed, and hand-printed cds...yeah.
"Why that little!!!!" Max screamed with a violent anger.
"What kind of tank is that?" said Sami. "It looks so...weird"
"Yeah, I guess it is the attacking enemy....THE ENEMY IS HERE!!!!" screamed Max. "Everyone to battle positions!"
"Where is that?" asked Andy.
"Down the hall, to the left, around the corner, and there will be a chair."
"WHEEEE!" and so Andy ran off.
"What a stupid dork" Sami laughed.
"Why is he a CO again?"
"Homeless, mentally insane, mentally unstable, threatened me with a gun, and..." Nell said.
"Yeah I get the point."
(In the distant background...)
"Weeeeeee! This is fun! How'd we get here anyway. Where's them Nazi's! I want to kill em!! This is gonna be fun!"
"Hold your pants, Patton! We'll be killing in awhile. And first we don't want to be killin Nazi's. We want to kill these innocent people that threaten us! And plus German generals are our friends. Right Rommel?"
"Yesh! We kill sem! German general be nice to nice USA and thy Britain" said Erwin Rommel in his illiterate English.
"Montgomery your always right. Except for Market Garden! HAHAHAH!" yelled Patton.
"Ohhh Shut up!" squealed Montgomery. "It would of work, if we wasn't using them stupid US infantry!"
"If yud were smart, yud find out that thy British infauntry was thy mistake" said Rommel.
"Oh you little German bastard!"
"Tehehehe!" laughed Rommel.
A random Orange star civilian comes up to Rommel and says, "Vo sind die toiletten?" (Where are the toilets?)
Patton takes out a pistol and shoots the dude in the head. "You're dead. You don't need a freakin toilet!" A very long pause. "Ohhh yes! Advance all units. Isn't that the name of the game? 'Advance Wars."
They all sigh.
Next chapter... CHAPTER 2: ...And so they attacked...With the Desert FOX!
~~And until next time! So long, hope you shitted in your pants because you thought this was funny. Because it was stupid. Except for...THE DESERT FOX or (THE Illiterate DESERT FOX) Bye guys. Please Review; I would like some...constructive criticism. Whatever that means.