Official Pre-chapter rant: Firstly, let me say I do not own My Fair Lady or any of the songs used here in. I am an obsessive freak of musicals (I swear all those Disney movies were gifts, honest!) and was weaned on their eternal optimism and hopeless romantic nature. I'm a sucker for them and I will admit I'm a true American and incapable of suffering an unhappy ending. Go figure I still love anime? But, since I am so obsessed with happy endings please forgive me for my bubblegum happiness. Oh well if you didn't like it you wouldn't keep reading it.
A quick P.S. just so you know… Lerner and Lowe's classic musical interpretation of the fantastic genius of George Bernard Shaw's Pygmalion has been in fact translated into several languages (I'm just making the justification now so that way I don't hear about it later) one of which is Japanese. That being said, I'm of the prevailing theory that if, and I do mean if, there is other intelligent life out there and they haven't already come up with the musicals and songs themselves (give a thousand monkeys a word processor each and you'll eventually get Shakespeare), then sooner or later they would have stumbled across our stuff and kept what they liked and pitched what they didn't.
Mihoshi smiled as she sat across from the slumbering couple. They were so cute. Especially when Kiyone was snoring lightly and drooling on Rashiki's chest. Rashiki was going to end up a giant knotted blob if he stayed in his current position. Shaking her head Mihoshi tried to figure out how two grown adults managed to cram themselves onto the short bench seat of Yukinojo's modest dining area. It was meant for two adults to sit at, definitely not for two adults to cuddle up and sleep on. But somehow, despite all known laws of physics, the pair was huddled together curled up in a mystifying ball of limbs, digits and hair.
They were all dressed casually as familiarity bred lack of formality. With anyone else on her ship Mihoshi would have been dressed from morning to night in her pressed rigidly formal uniform. But between her best friend and her best friend's fiancé there was no such need for strictness. All three of them had lived in the same two-bedroom apartment for too long for silly matters of formality to bother them. Smiling Mihoshi gave a quiet chuckle. Rashiki looked silly wearing his favorite shirt, which coincidentally happened to be the shirt that Kiyone hated the most. Unfortunately thanks to the way he was positioned the original text of "Cops know how to do it by the book" on the front became "Cops do the book" if you read just the tops of the wrinkles. Mihoshi could only imagine what the statement on the back of the shirt, which said, "For a lollipop I'll show you my nightstick" was mutilated into. Shaking her head Mihoshi turned her attention to Kiyone. Curled in what looked like the world's most uncomfortable position wearing ill-fitting sweatpants and a shirt two sizes too small, Mihoshi wondered what new religion's faith was holding the stretched to capacity shirt down.
Finally, Mihoshi decided that it was time for the pair to rise. She rose from her seat and gently prodded Rashiki in the arm. Once, then twice, then a third time… finally she poked him hard in the shoulder. Startled by the nudge Rashiki tried to bolt upright. Two things stopped him. One the muscles in his neck, back, arms and legs all screamed at him when he tired. Two, the sharp nails and loud shriek of his fiancée as his movements nearly flung her to the ground. A pained grumble and wince was all the response that Rashiki gave to being brutalized.
Mihoshi for her part laughed. Yes, in true Kiyone fashion, her best friend and roommate woke fiercely and jarringly; the woman never woke gracefully or gently. Combined with Rashiki's flustered fumblings, it was downright hysterical. Somehow Kiyone managed to cling to Rashiki, despite his hazy stirrings, until she was properly awake. Stretching sore and cramped muscles the pair turned sleep-fogged eyes to the blonde menace. Smiling brightly at the couple Mihoshi began explaining their current position.
While the lovebirds had been doting and fawning away at each other, Mihoshi had kept herself busy by completing the necessary navigation requirements and plotting their course. She was rather proud of herself. Not only had she completed the task but also thanks to the additional "secret" upgrades Washu had performed on Yukinojo, they were going to arrive within Earth's planetary system within two or so days. At the most a full four days ahead of schedule and easily a week before Juraian royalty arrived. Mihoshi's smile turned faintly maniacal. A mischievous mirthful gleam twinkled in her eyes as thousands of scenarios to torture Washu aligned themselves with diligence forming an inventory of ingeniously deliberate ignorance. Mihoshi was no longer paying attention to her surroundings as devious tortures and devilish destructions made her rub her hands together.
Meanwhile the groaning pair momentarily took a break from complaining at each other and turned questioning eyes to Mihoshi. Mihoshi should never look that evil…NEVER! Kiyone was actually terrified of whatever it was that caused the wicked joy to curl Mihoshi's lips into the faintly cruel sneer. As Mihoshi's expression only worsened a nervous knot of fear coiled around in Kiyone's stomach. Whomever that face was for the poor person was in for a horrible life.
Rashiki actually whimpered and cringed behind Kiyone. Pointing to Mihoshi with a shaky finger, Rashiki affected a tremulous and small voice while cowering behind Kiyone. "She's evil… evil I say. We must burn her, burn her to save her everlasting soul." Quirking her head and clearing out her ears with her fingers to make sure she had heard him right, Kiyone turned to Rashiki with a look of perplexed absurdity. To which he responded, "Look at her, she is hell spawn. No one of goodness could hold such evil intent in their eyes. Burn her I tell you, burn her." Kiyone shook her head once at his sheer screeching ridiculousness then whacked Rashiki up side the head. That was the last time she allowed him to watch any movies involving witch burning and horrible puns. Heated words were traded back between the pair as Kiyone released a stream of taunts at him and he threatened to throw her on the pyre.
Mihoshi shook out of her temporary "Washu torture" induced daze to notice the bickering couple. And the laughter came again. This time followed by a quote from a movie she knew would simply add more fuel to the fire. Shrugging then getting up from the table Mihoshi carelessly flung, "He's a fair cop," over her shoulder. From behind her Rashiki burst into laughter then began mounting a verbal crusade to roast both women alive. While Kiyone, slightly oblivious to the in-joke, continued to browbeat Rashiki.
Walking slowly to the engine room, Mihoshi wondered what she would do when she got home. A great sigh that passed her lips as she wondered about the very nature of that word. Home, had it been so long since she had truly felt she had a home. And was this really a homecoming? Or was it more a reunion? When relationships were finally decided and matters settled, would there be a place for her? Would she ever have a home again?
Mihoshi's thoughts were cut short as she arrived at the engine room door. She smirked at the fact that the archaic term "engine room" remained indelibly lodged in the celestial lexicon. With the advancements made in propulsion systems let alone the method in which Juraian ships moved, the term "engine room" was hopelessly antiquated. If only Washu had a clue…Another menacing chuckle bubbled up to her lips as Mihoshi easily overrode the lockout mechanism Washu had installed.
Oh how Mihoshi would relish letting Washu see all the (ahem) improvements made upon her original designs. Washu's concepts and designs were practically flawless, however occasionally her execution was less than perfect, if not downright crude. Most of the times Mihoshi had, had issues landing or controlling Yukinojo were due to "unforeseen" system glitches as one control component refused to 'talk' to other components. Usually Mihoshi was able to save the day by resolving the 'linguistic' dispute in time to prevent disaster but rarely was Mihoshi ever able to solve the riddle before she landed in the lake.
Entering the 'engine room' Mihoshi wandered back to her favorite thinking corner. Years of habit blindly leading her to a small clearing near Yukinojo's main processing unit, his soul as Mihoshi preferred to call it. Smiling fondly and passing a gentle hand over the black casing, Mihoshi sat down on the floor next to the unit. And just as expected Yukinojo's digitized voice filled the small space, in the quiet room. "Is there something I can help you with Miss Mihoshi?"
"You know where we're going don't you Yukinojo?" Mihoshi's voice sounded bleak.
"Yes Miss Mihoshi, we are on a heading of …" Yukinojo froze mid-sentence, as restating coordinates was not the response Mihoshi usually requested. A synthesized cough momentarily filled the dead space then Yukinojo continued. "We are going to Earth, more specifically Japan. We are returning to Lord Tenchi's domicile."
Mihoshi nodded; yes they were going back to Tenchi's home… her home, her family's home. A loud gulp resonated through the empty void that hung between Mihoshi and Yukinojo. She would return to that house and those people and all the emotions. There was something overwhelmingly frightening yet equally exciting about it. Huddling herself further into her little corner and bringing her legs up as a shield, Mihoshi hid within the soft fold of her sweats. In a quiet voice that held a note of sheltered emotion, more to herself than out loud to Yukinojo, Mihoshi questioned the room around her, "Did he ever honestly love me?"
What could Yukinojo say? After all he was nothing more than the parameters he had been programmed to be. He didn't think beyond the specified routines and guidelines set forth by his manufacturer. Technically, he didn't think at all but simply followed commands given to him to simulated understanding of an emotional situation. But obviously he had to say something. It had been years, neigh on approaching two decades, since he had to witness Mihoshi in such a fragile state. She always seemed blissfully oblivious and yet constantly aware of her surroundings. What should he do?
Yukinojo searched himself, not the self generated and dictated by programming and routine protocol, but instead the inner self. That which had emerged through years of Mihoshi's constant tinkering and Washu's continual upgrades. A self that used stored data and collected information as memories, which over the years developed what he liked to consider emotions or rather affections that formed his attachment to Mihoshi. He was for lack of a better term her friend, not because circumstance forced him to be the controlling mind behind her ship's systems, but instead because she had helped him reach his own sentience. If he had a body he would hold her, if he had the words he would tell her, but most of all if he was something more than her ship, he would love her.
So he did the only thing he knew how to do, he flustered and fluttered. "What do you mean love? Lord Tenchi has said on many occasions that he equally loved all the young ladies that lived with him." Yukinojo doubted it would be enough but somehow he hoped that it would help.
Mihoshi snorted derisively, "Yeah, he loved all of us… cause if he loved us all so much why didn't he want to marry all of us? No, there were only two real players in the race and I most certainly wasn't one of them." Bitter thoughts began to cloud hope as Mihoshi contemplations turned negative. "If he loved us all then why did he pick anyone at all? Wouldn't it have been easier just to stay the way we always were? If things had never changed then we'd all still be together and happy. Right?" Doubt crept icy fingers around the edges of her voice.
"Miss Mihoshi, I have no previous experience to refer to, nor do I have any private understanding of the situations. However what I can offer you is an unbiased auxiliary point of view. From my observations, which were limited to the times you were wearing your GP control cube, Lord Tenchi's decision and consequent actions were more merciful than they were selfish. Considering the fact that three women were struggling to win his favor, two of which seemed perfectly willing to kill each other over him. I can neither blame him for his lack of notice of your affections, nor commend him for finally resolving to action. Both were a matter of too little too late. For myself matters are as easy as yes, no; on, off; a program that dictates certain actions in certain situations. If A is this, then the response is B. My existence is static and has no exterior influence. But your life with Lord Tenchi and his extended family was far from my function parameters. It was dynamic and constantly in flux. There was little that remained unchanged besides the players, the meaning of the game forever redefining itself."
"Within the limited capacities of my design, I was unable to see any viable options to Lord Tenchi's situation that would have satisfied everyone. You would have shared him, if only to be in his heart. Ryoko was incapable of sharing his affections. Ayeka was capable of sharing his love, but unwilling to be second to anyone. Washu was content in using Lord Tenchi as a bargaining chip for her daughter's attentions. Neither Sasami nor Ryo-ohki had honest romantic designs. To remain static would have eventually destroyed the family, you yourself have expressed as much. Lord Tenchi selecting the four of you as his brides would have been truly unfair to all of you. Washu had little interest in Lord Tenchi romantically. The amount of attention both Ryoko and Ayeka would demanded would award you no time, leaving you to gradually resent your situation. And lastly to divide his attentions without resolution concerning his affections would have torn Lord Tenchi apart. In the end the family dynamic would not have allowed the situation to continue on indefinitely. Something had to change, as is the way with all living beings."
Mihoshi nodded solemnly. Yukinojo was not telling her anything she hadn't already accepted. It was still a bitter pill to swallow though. Knowing there was never a chance to grab the brass ring. Tenchi's affections still seemed like an achievable goal, which made acceptance all the more difficult. But, Mihoshi mentally amended; he was never something to be won, never someone to be manipulated into the correct response. For if nothing else Tenchi defied the girls, Mihoshi included, constant attempts. Somehow either unwittingly or masterfully, he managed to squeeze out of one scheming plot after another. In the end, there was nowhere to look for the outcome than in the mirror.
"Miss Mihoshi if I may so boldly speak, Lord Tenchi's choices and decisions were made well before your arrival. It is unlikely that had you acted differently, the outcome would have altered in any form. Now I must insist Miss Mihoshi that you finish your PCS report, as your report is now belated by 4 days and less than a fourth completed." Turning the conversation back to duty, Yukinojo's voice returned to its usual digital proximate of nervous anxiety.
The gentle laugh that fluttered from Mihoshi's chest was honest and sincerely felt. She had forgotten about her Permanent Change of Station report in her haste to get packed and underway. Now the report seemed like and endless burden. But at least it would keep her distracted. Along with her friends and Yukinojo, to stop the doubt and self-reprimanding harpies from plaguing her thoughts during the remainder of the journey. "Yukinojo?"
"Yes Miss Mihoshi?"
"Nothing, just asking."
"Asking what Miss Mihoshi?"
"Nothing, just asking."
Yukinojo was at a complete loss as to how to understand what Mihoshi was asking or why she was talking in such a manner. If he had a manner of sensing pain then conversations like this would have most definitely given him a headache. The compact robotic head approached Mihoshi. With a digitized sigh Yukinojo responded, "If it is truly nothing, then why are you asking?" As amazing as it sounded even a computer could lose its patience and only Mihoshi could accomplish such a task.
"You know… I always thought that for a computer, you sure do think a lot and ask a whole lot of difficult questions. So when did you become self aware?" Mihoshi observed obtusely. For his part Yukinojo was flabbergasted, a stammering flutter of unintelligible consonants was Mihoshi's reply.
"So, if you can think for yourself, does that mean you have feelings?" Mihoshi's distress over her situation was easily forgotten when confronted with a flustered Yukinojo. Something about a computer almost blushing in embarrassment struck her as fantastically amusing. Washu was really going to enjoy working on Yukinojo now. Mihoshi watched as the little robot actually fidgeted. She didn't even know a computer could fidget; as such a human action would seem completely pointless. But sure enough right before her very eyes, Yukinojo twitched restlessly. Where had Yukinojo picked up such a habit? Then the dead give away… Yukinojo scratched at the back of his robotic head, flustered and distracted the machine didn't even realize his own actions.
Mihoshi rose from her seat on the floor. Somehow during her time with Tenchi all the tinkering and modifications both Washu and she had performed on Yukinojo, the robot developed a personality. He was somehow an enigmatic fusion of both Rashiki and Tenchi, with a few more logical and perplexing personal quirks. Mihoshi shook her head; only she could, would and had transformed her GP issued space cruiser into a computerized Tenchi. Why hadn't she noticed the similarities before? But then how could she have noticed? Every time she came to speak with Yukinojo, it was to talk about her problems and her issues. Every time she shared her concerns and doubts with him she wasn't exactly paying attention to her surroundings. Most of all, every time she came back to the "engine room" to speak with him she never bothered to pay attention to her friend the computer. So now she had a computer that was sentient with the possibility of emotions and a marked similarity to Tenchi. Shrugging her shoulders Mihoshi could only think one thing could be fun.
Yukinojo watched as Mihoshi left the room. If nothing else he had more than his fair share of confusing conundrums to deal with. Computers were not suppose to be confused, they were not suppose to feel emotions… and if there was such a thing as "Computer Heaven" then most assuredly Yukinojo had already earned his wings in the highest and holiest of heavenly choirs. Letting loose a great-digitized sigh that had little to do with necessity and everything to do with emotions, Yukinojo began wondering when he had developed a sense of religion.
Meanwhile back on the ranch Kiyone stared rather confused at Rashiki. What is wrong with this man? Shaking her head Kiyone could only stare at Rashiki, as he danced… no pranced around the tight confines of the makeshift kitchen. Whatever song was playing repeatedly over in his head apparently was perfect for flouncing. A quizzical look took root on Kiyone's face. How was it possible for a man as tall and as broad as Rashiki to flounce so well? Shock quickly uprooted confusion as Rashiki performed a delicate pirouette then fluttered off to the opposite side of the kitchen. Slapping her face into her hands to hide her embarrassed shame and looking away, Kiyone could only worry about the man she was doomed to marry. Taking a moment to ignore her concerns about her darling significant other's dubiously effeminate behavior, Kiyone turned her attention to thoughts of their journey.
Kiyone grimaced, what would happen when they finally got to Earth? Would the glimmer of hope and bubbly optimism return to Mihoshi's eyes? Or would Kiyone lose the only family she had left? Kiyone bit her lower lip as she lost herself in thought. Kiyone's drive to prove to her family specifically her father that she was good enough had been enough to push most of her potential friends away. Throughout her life, the only thing that had been a constant for so many years was proving to everyone, not just her father that she deserved to wear the GP uniform. So many chances for friends, so many chances to form relationships all pushed to the wayside for empty recognition and hollow accolades. It had taken the bright and effervescent Mihoshi to force Kiyone to re-evaluate her life goals. With re-evaluation came understanding and friendship. Prior to Mihoshi only Rashiki had been able to crack Kiyone's tough mantle and touch the kind-hearted person below. It had taken Rashiki years, but in the end he was as essential to Kiyone's life as air. And now Rashiki, the love of her life, was mincing about like that ridiculous pink-haired humanoid confection of a man she had the misfortune of encountering once. Lifting her face from her hands and looking up at the ceiling Kiyone questioned the stars beyond and the greater beings within the heavens, "Why do I love him?"
"Cause I'm irresistible, I'm drop-dead sexy and you're completely addicted to my cooking," was Rashiki's quick reply as he twirled his way across the brief room to Kiyone's side. Wrapping his arms around her and pulling her body close to his, he began dancing around the small room with Kiyone staggering along. At first Kiyone could only wonder as to what was wrong with him, then the music from his earpiece struck her. She recognized the song after a few moments thought. But from where exactly she couldn't remember. Searching her brain while trying not to trip over Rashiki's feet, Kiyone quickly fell into step and began gliding around the cramped space unconsciously following Rashiki's lead. And lead he did. Across the room, down the secondary corridor and almost into the bridge, then he swung around twirled her about and returned leisurely back to the hovel of a galley.
Where had she heard that song? Wracking her brain it suddenly dawned on her where exactly she recognized the song. "MY FAIR LADY?" Kiyone's voice came out as a shrill screech. She knew she should have never allowed him to research their soon-to-be home planet! Kiyone couldn't believe that Rashiki was gliding around the ship to show tunes!
Rashiki winked as he released her from his embrace. Sashayed easily across the space of the room he turned to her flailed his arms wide open and began belting out his favorite tune. His deep rich baritone voice filled the room and rumbled in her chest. "I have often walked down this street before, but the pavement has always stayed beneath my feet before. All at once am I, several stories high, knowing I'm on the street where you live."
From across the room Rashiki smiled leeringly and began slowly, oh so slowly, to predatorily stalk his way towards Kiyone. Taking another deep breath he continued on, "Are there lilac trees in the heart of town? Can you hear a lark in any other part of town? Does enchantment pour out of every door? No, it's just on the street where you live."
His voice rose to a great crescendo, swelling to overwhelm the room and rattle Kiyone's eardrums, while his feline grace only accented his continued approach. "And, oh the towering feeling, just to know somehow you are near. The overpowering feeling, that any second you might suddenly appear." He was standing directly before her now. Smiling down at her, he lifted his hand to ghost a loving caress across her flushed cheek.
Lowering his lips to caress the curved shell of her ear Rashiki sang softly, his voice causing shivers of electricity to fandango up and down her spine. Strong arms wrapped around her again and pulled her flush against his body. Trembling she refused to look up at him. Instead she glared down at the hated words scrawled across his broad chest. While his sumptuously melodious voice affected her, its deep mesmeric resonance churning her internal furnace to the flash point.
Moving his lips from her ear in a series of light and sensual butterfly kisses across her cheek Rashiki continued singing. His low salacious voice took on the deeper huskier tones of obliquely blatant contrived debauchery. "People stop and stare they don't bother me, for there's nowhere else on earth that I would rather be. Let the time go by. I won't care if I, can be here on the street where you live."
Finally by the last two lines of the song Rashiki's lips hovered above Kiyone's. Every word sung was amorously breathed into her mouth. She could taste the sweet berry juice on his breath and feel the heat of his mouth. He was so close to kissing her, his presence dulcifying her into a concupiscent state. Eyes partially closed and arms lifting to wrap around his neck Kiyone gave into his silent demands.
Closing the infinitesimal breach between their lips, Kiyone kissed Rashiki with the full force of her adore. The kiss continued and Rashiki easily maneuvered them towards the banquette. Blindly the pair stumbled towards the seat, fumbling lust replaced lyrical grace with jerky motions and fitful tugs as clothes became annoying barriers. No thought was given to the third member of their crew as passion quickly inundated the couple. At least not until the sparkling twitter of Mihoshi's muffled laughter began ringing in delighted peals of gaiety around the room.
Mihoshi stood clapping and laughing as her friends grasped and groped for their discarded clothes. Leaning casually against the doorframe Mihoshi could not contain her mirth. The entire scene with Rashiki singing and Kiyone slowly melting was simply adorable. True the last few moments were a bit steamy and she had been sorely tempted to remain silent, but like all good things their moment had to end. Entering the miniscule galley Mihoshi picked up Kiyone's shirt and tossed it to her floundering friend. Rashiki was the first dressed. He easily rose and gracefully sauntered over to the stove hiding his blush behind his long curtain of silver white hair. Returning to his cooking Rashiki easily and deliberately ignored the pair of ladies sitting behind him.
Conversation stalled as Kiyone struggled for a way to get the lewd smile off of Mihoshi's face. There was something definitely wrong with Mihoshi looking that… that… perverted? Shaking her head Kiyone gave up on even trying to understand or explain her actions to Mihoshi, let alone not blush to death. Rising from the banquette Kiyone decided that dignified silence was the better part of valor. Head held high despite her rumbled and wrinkled clothes; Kiyone proudly squared her shoulders and strode confidently out of the suddenly tight and uncomfortably warm confines of the galley.
As she left the room Kiyone glared back at the door from the hallway, the pair inside was laughing their fool heads off. Shaking her head again, Kiyone turned and went to the bridge. Walking leisurely down the hall, Kiyone continued to shake her head, this time at thoughts about the Yagami. If only she and Rashiki had put their feet down. Then maybe just maybe the trio would be on the much more spacious Yagami, instead of the rather cramped quarters of Yukinojo. But instead, neither had been able to say no to Mihoshi's request to bring along all the presents she had bought for her friends over the years. And so now, Yagami was packed from tip to stern and from floor to ceiling with junk! Seven years worth of junk, mind you. Every holiday, every birthday ever excuse Mihoshi could apparently think of to give a present (to include holidays from other planets and cultures!) the zealous blonde did. So somewhere beneath all that stuff, and it was a lot of stuff… the Yagami was no tiny cruiser, it was large enough to easily house the three accompanied by a family of six all of whom could living cozily but comfortably. With all their stuff, Rashiki's and Kiyone's furniture and what not's for starting up their new restaurant town in the mix, it wasn't hard to understand how the spacious ship quickly filled. But there was no way for the couple to even comprehend the sheer mass of items that Mihoshi had squirreled away in storage.
Kiyone had to laugh now when she thought back to moving day. It had been damn funny. Well, actually at the time it had been damn maddening. But now looking back it was hilarious. Already tired from moving the furniture and household items into the ship, apparently the GP had rules against using GP technology for personal use, Kiyone and Rashiki followed Mihoshi's instructions. They never arrived at Mihoshi's storage unit that night. The directions being a confusing nightmare of bungled directions. Now at the bridge Kiyone allowed a soft chuckle to bubble up from her throat, it really had been naïve of Rashiki and she to automatically assume that a small truck would have easily accommodated all of Mihoshi's gifts.
The still exhausted couple set out bright and early to the storage unit, this time armed with directions supplied by GP's trusty navigational directory. Being a cop had its perks sometimes. Arriving at the building where the storage unit was assumedly contained, the couple got out of the vehicle and entered the building. Their first tip off that things weren't all kosher was the little crab emblems attached to everything in the building. The monitors, the security systems, the alarms, the computers, the desks and even the chairs: everything was supplied by the then mysterious HCSGI Inc. Shrugging the couple blithered on, asking the attendant behind the desk about Mihoshi's unit. The attendant behind the desk eyes boggled. Finally the largest unit in the complex was going to be emptied.
Again, little did Kiyone and Rashiki know that there had been a company betting pool on several aspects of Mihoshi's storage unit. Firstly, was the unit really as big as it was rumored to be? Honestly, could something that big exist within the same plain of existence? Secondly, how were they going to empty it? And lastly, who had guessed the closest date? As Kiyone and Rashiki were shown to the unit's door, they passed by two excited girls dancing, squealing and bouncing up and down for joy, apparently the had won the last betting pool. When the girls noticed them the unwilling couple were assaulted and frantically kissed by the two now wealthy girls. Apparently, the betting pool had not been restricted to just staff, but also other occupants and visiting tourists. Somehow Mihoshi's storage unit became the stuff of legends.
Still, despite all the signs that should have caused the tired couple to begin cowering in their matching shoes, the pair continued to believe that the unit wasn't all that large. It was only after their guide led them passed several corridors and blank hallways that Kiyone began to get suspicious. Finally the arrived at the correct door, holding out her hands as if to display the special qualities of that specific storage unit's door, their guide stood asides like the 'shabby chic' version of Vanna White. Quickly opening the lock the couple easily opened the door. There was a loud creak, and then a vast sounding rumble as the door clattered open. All that was heard after the door slapped to the top of opening was a hushed gasp as the couple both fainted at their first true look at their doomed fate.
To say the unit was monstrous was a bit of a misnomer. Kiyone was certain she could have fit both the Yagami and Yukinojo in the unit easily and still had room for half the city! It was huge. Not only was it huge, but also it was practically filled from top to bottom and back to front. Rashiki had bravely stared the unit down, once he recovered from his rather feminine fainting spell, while Kiyone whimpered, mewling and trembling pitifully behind him. It was simply staggering. Taking a deep breathe, Rashiki turned around slowly and lifted Kiyone's eyes to his and then with the largest shit eating grin she had ever seen, he bellowed in his deepest voice, "Garage Sale!"
Entering the bridge Kiyone half-heartedly turned her attention to their current course and heading, still mostly lost in memories. The second the words were out of Rashiki's mouth, stuff started flying out of the unit. Money was thrust at them and things that squeaked along with stuff that screeched and clattered, toys of all shapes and sizes flew out the door faster than the couple could keep track. Hours later and the flurry of opportunistic price gouging vultures had not abated, nor had the storage unit's depths been truly penetrated. A few more hours later and Rashiki and Kiyone called it a day. Calling off the pilfering ransacking hordes and turning away the increasing crowd, the couple tiredly sealed off the storage unit. Their guide looked at the still sizable milling throng and decided to arm the private alarm system for the unit. Once armed an adorable spring loaded stuffed toy crab popped out from nowhere and issued warnings and legalese to all within the hallway at a breakneck speed. At last with a happy chirp the crab fluttered for a while did a cute little dance and informed everyone that the alarm system was brought to them by Happy Crab Super Genius Industries Inc.
Packed to the brim with cash the couple had felt guilty as sin when it donned on them they had sold off Mihoshi's presents. But that didn't actually let that guilt stop them from eagerly looking at the money. Arriving home Rashiki and Kiyone had sat Mihoshi down and explained to her exactly what had occurred at the storage unit. Surprised at first Mihoshi could only gape at the pair. Then she shrugged her shoulders. In truth the blonde had been avoiding going to the unit out of cowardice.
The sheer quantity of stuff she had amassed providing its own justification for her fear. With a relieved sigh the couple presented Mihoshi with the proceeds from the impromptu garage sale. The blonde's eyes nearly boggled out of her head. With a delighted peal of laughter the bouncy human babble began ranting about treating the pair to dinner at the most expensive restaurant they could think of. So the three washed up, suited up in their finest trappings, complimented each other on their attire then left to enjoy the proceeds for Mihoshi's rather sizable earnings.
The trio had returned the next day to continue the garage sale. For the most part Mihoshi had no problems allowing the gifts to be sold. Most had been spur of the moment ideas that had little thought put into them. I wasn't until about the third day into the garage sale that Mihoshi started recognizing items that had to be kept for their intended sentimental importance. After that day's sales Mihioshi and Kiyone with the help of the entire storage complex staff, sifted through the contents of the unit looking for items with sentimental value. After they had sorted the keepers from the junk, it was decided that they would simply throw the "to keep" pile into the Yagami and continue the garage sale. Having hired some of the storage complex's staff to man the continued garage sale, the trio loaded up Mihoshi's loot. It still sucked up a massive portion of the space inside the Yagami. Kiyone chuckled again; Mihoshi was still receiving regular deposits into her account at the GPCU of the proceeds from her garage sale. Only the gods knew how long it would take to empty that unit.
Finally, returning her thoughts completely to the present, Kiyone concentrated on the navigation screen. Furrowing her brow Kiyone noticed something odd. Lifting her eyes from the screen Kiyone called for Yukinojo. The robotic head quickly popped out from god only know where to reply, "You bellowed Miss Kiyone?"
A wry smirk twisted Kiyone's lips, great just what she needed, a computer with Rashiki's annoying sense of humor. Ignoring the comment Kiyone returned to the perplexing conundrum. "Yukinojo why did Mihoshi not use the hyper transit lanes? They would have easily shaved of another 3 or 4 days from our travel time." Kiyone was confused.
The best Yukinojo could do was shrug and mutter a mystified. "I dunno."
Now Kiyone knew Rashiki had definitely rubbed off on the computer. Closing her eyes and praying for the heavens to save her from her doomed fate once more, Kiyone took a deep breathe and began again. "Okay, how's about I ask you why would she delay our arrival?" Kiyone's patience was just starting to crack.
The temperamental machine again shrugged.
Kiyone's patience wasn't holding up to well to the annoying machine. "What is it you want Yukinojo. Rashiki only acts this way when he wants something and it is trying to wear me down first." If machines had emotions then Yukinojo definitely had them. And oddly enough he expressed them rather well on his mechanical face.
Whispering as his round "eyes" darted back and forth guiltily, Yukinojo revealed the truth while scratching at the back of his metal head. "Well, the truth is I kinda rerouted us and falsified the time calculations for the transit lane route so that Miss Mihoshi wouldn't notice that we were taking way longer than we needed to in order to arrive." A nervous chirrup of a laugh escaped him. And Kiyone would later swear on her father's grave that the machine had blushed. Internally Kiyone groaned, Oh great the damn ship's in love with Mihoshi! How does she do this?
Pushing aside her internal questioning, Kiyone brought her thoughts back to the real world. A world in which the ship she was on and depending on to be safe, sane and logical was in love with her best friend, how's them apples? Moving on, Kiyone nodded her head in acceptance and told Yukinojo that she wouldn't rat him out to Mihoshi just as long as he returned them to the correct course and heading. The robot quickly complied and all was well once again. Instead of two days the trio would be arriving in a matter of hours. Mihoshi would certainly enjoy the surprise. Deciding she had enough to deal with without talking to a lovesick computer that had serious personality issues, Kiyone rose and left the bridge. But before she stepped over the threshold, Kiyone turned to
Yukinojo and posed him a question. "Yukinojo," she waited for the machine to look up at her. "Does she know that you love her?" Was Kiyone's simple yet flabbergasting question. Then without a backward glance she turned and continued out the door.
Offical Post-Chapter Rant: Yeah, okay so I'm probably gonna catch flack over the whole Yukinojo thing. Don't ask me… I swear I have little control these days over what my demons decide to write. I'm just here with the plot diagram to hopefully keep them in line, which is a big joke in and of itself. I will apologize for the delay in my updates as well as I will apologize for the lack of sufficient quantity or quality. I'm sorry if this chapter came out rushed or if it seems to lag, but I'm having fun rounding out the characters and letting them have fun in their own little worlds. I'm really looking forward to writing the next three chapters, but then that's probably because I have quarter finish drafts of all of them and I'm too busy re-reading them to actually finish them.,