A Step Towards Forever

The subway car was crowded , but not unpleasantly so. There was still seats available, but she chose to stand. A glance at the watch she seldom wore told her that it would soon be nine. She hated the subway trains, hated the monotonous precision that they ran with. They didn't tire in the face of the mountainous job they had to carry out. She almost laughed at the sentiment.

Three years ago, she would had never have had that thought, but back then, she was still safely tucked in her own little fantasy world where Viktor ruled supreme. It had been an awful shock to learn that he had lied to her. It had been even worse to discover that he- not the lycans- had killed her family. Had her heart still been able to feel, she was sure it would had broken into a thousand fragments. You could keep them together, but not re- make the whole.

No-one leaned against her or squashed her with the bags they carried. Her pregnant belly made people careful around her. One man had even offered her his seat, which she had declined, saying that she was getting off at the next stop. She guessed that no-one wanted her to have her baby in front of them

Somehow, the subway offered her a little protection, a tiny slice of anonymity that she sometimes longed to feel. Down here, she was just another young unmarried woman who had gotten knocked up. The simple clothes she wore gave no clues to her personality. The dress was bland- nothing like the little black number she had worn to confront Michael. Her coat and shoes could had cost thousands or nothing. It gave her a little comfort, something that was lacking in her life.

The truth was, she didn't have anywhere to be. The hotel which she had called home for the early part of her pregnancy had been sold to a real estate developer. It had been torn down and skyscrapers were being built in it's former place. She missed the first place she had come to call home since fleeing Viktor's mansion almost three years before. It was a sad thought that she had nowhere to call home. She made a snap decision. She was going to buy a house. But where? Most places in the city where out of her reach. They where either too expensive or to closed to outsiders. She let her shoulders sag a little as the thought hit home. It was time to move on, to find somewhere new to live.

Her heart wanted to go home- back to the house where she had been born, not once, but twice. Common sense told her it would had been long since torn down, but the longing wouldn't lessen. If her heart, and not her head was correct, the house would be an ideal solution. It had been remote, back then, and she was willing to bet it still would be. The only thing that bothered her was the fact she couldn't pinpoint exactly why she wanted to go back to the house where she had seen her family butchered. Wouldn't it only serve to bring her more pain? Maybe that was exactly why she wanted to go back. If she was hurting, she could feel. Not incapable of love, just too frozen to thaw. Still, she knew that the longing to go home wouldn't leave her. She had to obey it's call.

The train abruptly lurched to a stop. Loose items where thrown forward by the rapid deceleration. A quick grab at a seat next to her prevented her from doing the same. The lights flickered and went out, leaving the car in absolute darkness. A few people screamed, but she was not one of them. Without consciously thinking about it, she felt her teeth lengthen into needle pointed fangs. Her eyes changed as the vampire in her took over. It was the first time she had changed since the night Michael had abandoned her. Her hand reached for the gun she didn't have. She could see as well in the darkness as the panicked humans around her could in bright sunlight. Outside of the inch thick window, a shadow that shouldn't have been there moved. She knew what was going to happen and dropped to the floor, mindful of her bump.

Gunfire broke out around her, and she heard thuds as people fell to the floor, followed shortly by the cries of the injured. She didn't let herself wonder at the death toll. No doubt it would be high. She felt nothing for the people themselves, but could appreciate the sorrow of the families left behind. After all, dead is dead. Nothing could change that fact. Not even being a vampire.

A few people stared crying, and through the noise. Selene thought that she could hear on man praying to a god that didn't exist. His words were hurried and panicked, his breaths coming in sobs. The sound of discharging guns tapered off, and she knew that she had to risk moving if she wanted to live. Keeping low, she hugged the wall of the car and moved as quickly as she could towards the exit at the back of the train. She didn't get far. Her attackers could see as well as she could in the dark. Hampered as she was by her pregnancy, she didn't have the range of movement that they had.

She felt the impact before she heard the shots. Her suddenly weak arms gave way from under her, which saved her life as two more rounds narrowly missed her head. She couldn't move- the bullets had hit her in the back. She could feel one of them moving against bone as she struggled for breath. A dark puddle was forming under her as she lay on the cold floor. Just because she was immortal didn't mean she couldn't die. Outside, the attackers melted away. Their job was done. The world around her faded and she drifted, strangely content. She was going home after all.