** Disclaimer: I only own Zana, Merwen and the kind elf :) I don't own the
song, neither the songs of the following chapter.. but i have to include
them, because what kind of ball would it be without my favourite ballads?
But you'll have to wait a bit before knowing what will happen in the big
party :)
Oh, as you can see, I couldn't wait until weekend to update.
******************************************************************
The way you look tonight
I never will forget, the way you look tonight
The lady in red
The lady in red
- Lady in red- Chris deBurgh
It was 8 and Merwen came to my room to check if I needed some help. I was standing there, my dress already on, and I was looking myself in the mirror, feeling so strange. The long dress was a bit tight, dark red, with long sleeves now that we were in autumn. The boots also read, but they couldn't be seen under all the clothes I was wearing. My hair a mess, but Merwen helped me. When I saw the result in mirror I couldn't recognise myself.
"This is really me?" Merwen smiled and nodded.
"You just needed a bit of help, you have to learn a lot about cosmetics, hairdos and dresses, why did nobody in your world teach you?" I sighed, shrugging.
"I suppose I wasn't too obsessed with my appearance, I was a normal and common girl there and I liked to dress in comfortable clothes"
"Well, in some minutes the dinner will begin, will you join them?"
I suddenly felt so scared, after all what had happened before. I asked Merwen if she could bring me some food, because I had decided to stay in my room. She gave me a surprised look, as if I was crazy.
"But this will be a very important dinner, Zana. You can't miss it, what will the king say? And Aragorn?"
"I don't know and I don't care, I just can't go, I can't" I whispered, desperately . But Merwen got a bit angry.
"Staying here won't solve your worries, and it will add one more problem to your life, so please, go out of this room and sit in the big table with all the elves , dwarf, hobbits and human who are waiting for you, because I won't bring you anything"
She left the room quickly, and I stood there, confused. It was already night outside, and I went to my balcony. Full moon again. And the lights in the gardens on, where some elves were carrying tables, chairs and lots of things they needed for that event. I was wondering how could I escape from that dinner without being noticed.. at first, when I had arrived, I was so sure that nobody would miss me if I disappeared.. but now I was making a mental list with the persons who would ask about me in the case I didn't show up.. and to my surprise the list wasn't small, and it included the most important elves there. Maybe I wasn't ignored, and all what I had was an attitude problem. Anyway, my feelings about being there were the same. But sometimes you have to choose.. you can act like a victim, or you can play the game. And it wasn't my intention to be a victim.
I came in the room again and fixed some more things before leaving. When I opened the door, first I made sure that Haldir wouldn't step outside when I went out.. but I was also sure that after our conversation he would run away from me. He would attend this dinner for Aragorn and then , after it, he would leave. So I only had to resist in the dinning room.. just an embarrassing hour.. maybe two.. and then nothing else. It couldn't be so difficult. And I remembered Legolas, his kindness towards me, and when Haldir left, I would feel comfortable again.
With those thoughts I walked outside, trying not to make noises. The halls were bright in the candle's light.. they put them for this special occasion, and they gave a mysterious look to the whole palace.. it was like a dream. When I stopped in the door of the dinning room , I noticed I was late, very late, because all people were already sitting. This time they put one large table, instead of the small rounded ones.. I was breathless with the sight of the room.. hundreds, maybe thousands of candles, the moonlight and a nice music.. all elves elegantly dressed, and the King in the top of the table, looking at me. In fact, all people turned around to see who was the stranger who dared to arrive late. I felt so ashamed. There were so many people that I couldn't recognise anybody there..
A waiter walked towards me and led me to my seat. And I froze. Yeah, I froze, blushed and all those things that make you feel embarrassed and that make you want to die at once. Because I was sitting next to Haldir and far away from Legolas, Aragorn and the King. I looked for the hobbits, and unfortunately they were too distant to keep a conversation . Pippin sent me a calming smile, but this didn't help.
"Well, now that we all are finally here, I want to say some words for our guest Aragorn, who will leave us tonight after dinner" The king spoke , standing up. And I was surprised.. Aragorn would leave before the party, so probably with Haldir. I could feel Haldir's sight over me, because Aragorn was on our left and our heads were turned. On my left there was a male elf, unknown for me, who looked so concentrated.. but the thing I most wished in that moment was to speak with him and avoid the silence of Haldir. But when I opened my mouth, the king went on talking.
"Aragorn, it was a pleasure to have you here in Mirkwood, my kingdom. We all will miss you and we send our best wishes to your wife" All elves clapped and whistled, smiling. " And as you decided to leave so early, I'm afraid we'll have to make the party without you" A lot of "oooh's" filled the room, and they all laughed again. " So have a good journey, my friend, with the ones who will join you on it" The king looked at the hobbits, and Merry and Pippin stood up and greeted. Then ,the king watched in my direction. Probably he also wanted to say some words to Haldir, who was supposed to leave too. I waited.
" And now, we want to hear some words from a special person who joined us few time ago" I looked at Haldir, but he was looking at me, like the rest of the table. What was happening? "Zana, please.." The king invited me to talk, and I blushed, I turned into red, like my dress. "Come on, stand up"
The room was silent, all eyes on me. "Well.. I don't know what to say.. I suppose that I should thank you all for your kindness, for the new friendships I've found here, although it seems that tonight the two hobbits will leave and I will miss them a lot" Merry and Pippin smiled. "Anyway.. I hope that I won't cause any problem while I'll be here and if I already troubled someone , I want to say that I'm really sorry. This is new for me, and I'm a bit scared and nervous" I smiled, and I saw Gandalf smiling at me. Also Aragorn. Legolas was serious, staring at me. And of course, I couldn't watch at Haldir because he was too close to me, just under my head, but I felt he was watching at me too. "Oh, and thank you for all those dresses, and everything. I feel as if I was someone completely different with those clothes and I can't recognise myself" They all smiled. "Well.." My voice sounded shy . " And I suppose this is everything, thank you".
When I sat down I heard everybody clapping, and smiling at me. It seemed that finally I had been accepted. The waiters started to bring the dinner, but my stomach was closed, too nervous to eat anything. My heart was beating so fast, and I looked at the elf on my left.
"So.. what kind of food is this?" He looked at me, surprised.
"Well, it's a kind of meat.." He explained with a kind voice. " You never tried it before?"
We started a kind of food- conversation, and I was talking all time, as if I was giving a speech. I talked about the biggest nonsense in the world, like salt, piper and the story about one day I ate too many sweets and I had terrible effects.. I could hear my own voice and I was telling all time to myself "Shut up". The elf started to look bored, and he tried to tell me, in a kind way, that if I spoke too much I wouldn't be able to eat. But I almost couldn't touch the meat, that was too much for me, having Haldir by my side after all the things I had said. I took a glass of wine and drank the whole liquid at once. And I remembered that wine caused strange effects on me.
"You shouldn't drink so fast, even more when you're hardly eating" Haldir spoke in low voice to me. I turned to watch at him, his blue eyes cold, like always.
"I'm eating" But I knew it wasn't true. "And I was thirsty, that's all. I won't drink more by the moment"
"By the moment?" His eyes brighter, as if they were smiling.. but maybe it was my imagination and he didn't smile at all. "So you plan to get drunk tonight?"
"This worries you?" I asked, with sarcastic voice. Oh, no.. the wine. Haldir smiled a bit.
"The thing that worries me is what wine can make you tell to any of the elves who are sitting here" Now he was kidding, sure. He was laughing at me because of what I had told him before. I looked at him, but he went on eating and started to talk to the elf on his right.
The rest of the dinner passed so fast.. the poor elf on my left was patient enough to bear me and we kept a nice and normal conversation about his family and Mirkwood. So when the king announced that it was time to leave the dinning room and enter the big dancing saloon, I was amazed. I checked time, but I had left my watch in the room.
"It's 10 in the night" Haldir had read my mind, and I looked at him surprised.
But everybody stood up and left.. they hugged Aragorn, they shook hands.. the hobbits even cried a bit, and when I kneeled to gave them a kiss, I felt so sad. I was going to miss them. Pippin took my hand and whispered something in my ear " Good luck with your elves" He smiled and winked.
"What do you mean?" I asked, blushing.
"You know" The two hobbits left with Aragorn , walking to the rooms to take their bags. I looked for Haldir, checking if he was in the dinning room, but I couldn't find him . So in the end he had decided to leave. Without saying goodbye? And I would never see him again? Why did I feel bad?
"You look sad" Legolas came by my side and smiled softly.
"I'll miss the two hobbits" I replied, and inside me I realised I was sad because of something else, but I couldn't say why. Legolas put his hand on my shoulder.
"You have more friends here, Zana. Give them a chance" I looked up at him , at his smiling blue eyes.
"Thank you" My voice was just a whisper as he left joining the group and walking behind Aragorn. I was alone again. I saw the rest of elves in the next room, the big saloon, and I entered, amazed with the place.. nothing on Earth could be compared to the sight of those wonderful constructions.. the ceiling was so high that it seemed to touch the stars. There were lots of tables around the centre of the room, with many different drinks.. And in a corner, Gandalf was sitting and smoking. When he saw me, he waved his hand to call me.
"Zana, I have a surprise for you" He said, with a secret smile. "Write on this paper the names of all your favourite songs.. and tonight magic will play them for you"
"Do you mean that I'll be able to listen all the songs I want? How?"
"Never ask a magician about his magic! Now, while we wait for the king and the prince, write. Come on!" I sat next to him , took the paper and started to write.. more than fifty songs came to my head, but maybe they were too much. Gandalf read my mind again "The night is long, we'll need some music" Yeah, this would make the party a bit better.. my beloved music.. how did I miss it!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------
The king and Legolas walked with the travellers to the main door. A kind of sadness was floating in the atmosphere, like always, when someone left the people he loved. The moon was shining in the sky.
"The night is clear, you won't have any problem in your way" The king spoke, and shook hands with them. "Good luck, my friends"
The company left as Legolas and the king stood in the door. Then they returned to the saloon. Legolas was so shocked that he almost didn't speak. His father was curious too. "It seems that every day brings a new surprise, son.. plans were a bit different some hours ago, I wonder what happened to make things turn into this " . Legolas nodded. He knew the answer, but preferred to ignore it. He had known it since the first day. He knew Haldir very well.
******************************************************************
The way you look tonight
I never will forget, the way you look tonight
The lady in red
The lady in red
- Lady in red- Chris deBurgh
It was 8 and Merwen came to my room to check if I needed some help. I was standing there, my dress already on, and I was looking myself in the mirror, feeling so strange. The long dress was a bit tight, dark red, with long sleeves now that we were in autumn. The boots also read, but they couldn't be seen under all the clothes I was wearing. My hair a mess, but Merwen helped me. When I saw the result in mirror I couldn't recognise myself.
"This is really me?" Merwen smiled and nodded.
"You just needed a bit of help, you have to learn a lot about cosmetics, hairdos and dresses, why did nobody in your world teach you?" I sighed, shrugging.
"I suppose I wasn't too obsessed with my appearance, I was a normal and common girl there and I liked to dress in comfortable clothes"
"Well, in some minutes the dinner will begin, will you join them?"
I suddenly felt so scared, after all what had happened before. I asked Merwen if she could bring me some food, because I had decided to stay in my room. She gave me a surprised look, as if I was crazy.
"But this will be a very important dinner, Zana. You can't miss it, what will the king say? And Aragorn?"
"I don't know and I don't care, I just can't go, I can't" I whispered, desperately . But Merwen got a bit angry.
"Staying here won't solve your worries, and it will add one more problem to your life, so please, go out of this room and sit in the big table with all the elves , dwarf, hobbits and human who are waiting for you, because I won't bring you anything"
She left the room quickly, and I stood there, confused. It was already night outside, and I went to my balcony. Full moon again. And the lights in the gardens on, where some elves were carrying tables, chairs and lots of things they needed for that event. I was wondering how could I escape from that dinner without being noticed.. at first, when I had arrived, I was so sure that nobody would miss me if I disappeared.. but now I was making a mental list with the persons who would ask about me in the case I didn't show up.. and to my surprise the list wasn't small, and it included the most important elves there. Maybe I wasn't ignored, and all what I had was an attitude problem. Anyway, my feelings about being there were the same. But sometimes you have to choose.. you can act like a victim, or you can play the game. And it wasn't my intention to be a victim.
I came in the room again and fixed some more things before leaving. When I opened the door, first I made sure that Haldir wouldn't step outside when I went out.. but I was also sure that after our conversation he would run away from me. He would attend this dinner for Aragorn and then , after it, he would leave. So I only had to resist in the dinning room.. just an embarrassing hour.. maybe two.. and then nothing else. It couldn't be so difficult. And I remembered Legolas, his kindness towards me, and when Haldir left, I would feel comfortable again.
With those thoughts I walked outside, trying not to make noises. The halls were bright in the candle's light.. they put them for this special occasion, and they gave a mysterious look to the whole palace.. it was like a dream. When I stopped in the door of the dinning room , I noticed I was late, very late, because all people were already sitting. This time they put one large table, instead of the small rounded ones.. I was breathless with the sight of the room.. hundreds, maybe thousands of candles, the moonlight and a nice music.. all elves elegantly dressed, and the King in the top of the table, looking at me. In fact, all people turned around to see who was the stranger who dared to arrive late. I felt so ashamed. There were so many people that I couldn't recognise anybody there..
A waiter walked towards me and led me to my seat. And I froze. Yeah, I froze, blushed and all those things that make you feel embarrassed and that make you want to die at once. Because I was sitting next to Haldir and far away from Legolas, Aragorn and the King. I looked for the hobbits, and unfortunately they were too distant to keep a conversation . Pippin sent me a calming smile, but this didn't help.
"Well, now that we all are finally here, I want to say some words for our guest Aragorn, who will leave us tonight after dinner" The king spoke , standing up. And I was surprised.. Aragorn would leave before the party, so probably with Haldir. I could feel Haldir's sight over me, because Aragorn was on our left and our heads were turned. On my left there was a male elf, unknown for me, who looked so concentrated.. but the thing I most wished in that moment was to speak with him and avoid the silence of Haldir. But when I opened my mouth, the king went on talking.
"Aragorn, it was a pleasure to have you here in Mirkwood, my kingdom. We all will miss you and we send our best wishes to your wife" All elves clapped and whistled, smiling. " And as you decided to leave so early, I'm afraid we'll have to make the party without you" A lot of "oooh's" filled the room, and they all laughed again. " So have a good journey, my friend, with the ones who will join you on it" The king looked at the hobbits, and Merry and Pippin stood up and greeted. Then ,the king watched in my direction. Probably he also wanted to say some words to Haldir, who was supposed to leave too. I waited.
" And now, we want to hear some words from a special person who joined us few time ago" I looked at Haldir, but he was looking at me, like the rest of the table. What was happening? "Zana, please.." The king invited me to talk, and I blushed, I turned into red, like my dress. "Come on, stand up"
The room was silent, all eyes on me. "Well.. I don't know what to say.. I suppose that I should thank you all for your kindness, for the new friendships I've found here, although it seems that tonight the two hobbits will leave and I will miss them a lot" Merry and Pippin smiled. "Anyway.. I hope that I won't cause any problem while I'll be here and if I already troubled someone , I want to say that I'm really sorry. This is new for me, and I'm a bit scared and nervous" I smiled, and I saw Gandalf smiling at me. Also Aragorn. Legolas was serious, staring at me. And of course, I couldn't watch at Haldir because he was too close to me, just under my head, but I felt he was watching at me too. "Oh, and thank you for all those dresses, and everything. I feel as if I was someone completely different with those clothes and I can't recognise myself" They all smiled. "Well.." My voice sounded shy . " And I suppose this is everything, thank you".
When I sat down I heard everybody clapping, and smiling at me. It seemed that finally I had been accepted. The waiters started to bring the dinner, but my stomach was closed, too nervous to eat anything. My heart was beating so fast, and I looked at the elf on my left.
"So.. what kind of food is this?" He looked at me, surprised.
"Well, it's a kind of meat.." He explained with a kind voice. " You never tried it before?"
We started a kind of food- conversation, and I was talking all time, as if I was giving a speech. I talked about the biggest nonsense in the world, like salt, piper and the story about one day I ate too many sweets and I had terrible effects.. I could hear my own voice and I was telling all time to myself "Shut up". The elf started to look bored, and he tried to tell me, in a kind way, that if I spoke too much I wouldn't be able to eat. But I almost couldn't touch the meat, that was too much for me, having Haldir by my side after all the things I had said. I took a glass of wine and drank the whole liquid at once. And I remembered that wine caused strange effects on me.
"You shouldn't drink so fast, even more when you're hardly eating" Haldir spoke in low voice to me. I turned to watch at him, his blue eyes cold, like always.
"I'm eating" But I knew it wasn't true. "And I was thirsty, that's all. I won't drink more by the moment"
"By the moment?" His eyes brighter, as if they were smiling.. but maybe it was my imagination and he didn't smile at all. "So you plan to get drunk tonight?"
"This worries you?" I asked, with sarcastic voice. Oh, no.. the wine. Haldir smiled a bit.
"The thing that worries me is what wine can make you tell to any of the elves who are sitting here" Now he was kidding, sure. He was laughing at me because of what I had told him before. I looked at him, but he went on eating and started to talk to the elf on his right.
The rest of the dinner passed so fast.. the poor elf on my left was patient enough to bear me and we kept a nice and normal conversation about his family and Mirkwood. So when the king announced that it was time to leave the dinning room and enter the big dancing saloon, I was amazed. I checked time, but I had left my watch in the room.
"It's 10 in the night" Haldir had read my mind, and I looked at him surprised.
But everybody stood up and left.. they hugged Aragorn, they shook hands.. the hobbits even cried a bit, and when I kneeled to gave them a kiss, I felt so sad. I was going to miss them. Pippin took my hand and whispered something in my ear " Good luck with your elves" He smiled and winked.
"What do you mean?" I asked, blushing.
"You know" The two hobbits left with Aragorn , walking to the rooms to take their bags. I looked for Haldir, checking if he was in the dinning room, but I couldn't find him . So in the end he had decided to leave. Without saying goodbye? And I would never see him again? Why did I feel bad?
"You look sad" Legolas came by my side and smiled softly.
"I'll miss the two hobbits" I replied, and inside me I realised I was sad because of something else, but I couldn't say why. Legolas put his hand on my shoulder.
"You have more friends here, Zana. Give them a chance" I looked up at him , at his smiling blue eyes.
"Thank you" My voice was just a whisper as he left joining the group and walking behind Aragorn. I was alone again. I saw the rest of elves in the next room, the big saloon, and I entered, amazed with the place.. nothing on Earth could be compared to the sight of those wonderful constructions.. the ceiling was so high that it seemed to touch the stars. There were lots of tables around the centre of the room, with many different drinks.. And in a corner, Gandalf was sitting and smoking. When he saw me, he waved his hand to call me.
"Zana, I have a surprise for you" He said, with a secret smile. "Write on this paper the names of all your favourite songs.. and tonight magic will play them for you"
"Do you mean that I'll be able to listen all the songs I want? How?"
"Never ask a magician about his magic! Now, while we wait for the king and the prince, write. Come on!" I sat next to him , took the paper and started to write.. more than fifty songs came to my head, but maybe they were too much. Gandalf read my mind again "The night is long, we'll need some music" Yeah, this would make the party a bit better.. my beloved music.. how did I miss it!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------
The king and Legolas walked with the travellers to the main door. A kind of sadness was floating in the atmosphere, like always, when someone left the people he loved. The moon was shining in the sky.
"The night is clear, you won't have any problem in your way" The king spoke, and shook hands with them. "Good luck, my friends"
The company left as Legolas and the king stood in the door. Then they returned to the saloon. Legolas was so shocked that he almost didn't speak. His father was curious too. "It seems that every day brings a new surprise, son.. plans were a bit different some hours ago, I wonder what happened to make things turn into this " . Legolas nodded. He knew the answer, but preferred to ignore it. He had known it since the first day. He knew Haldir very well.