She lay on the hospital bed, as she had been for quite some time now. I had kept a silent vigil, watching her, ever since she fell unconscious. I had not moved from my chair, not when Serenity brought me some coffee, which was cooling on the table beside, untouched. Not when Tristan came in with pizza, which he had taken away so it could be finished before it went bad. Not even when Yugi came in to try and get me to fall asleep. I'd been awake and motionless for six hours now, sitting on a chair just across the room from her bedside. I would have picked it up and moved closer, but it was bolted to the floor.
Tristan came in now, and he sat with me. I was ignoring him, but it wasn't his fault. He knew that, but I still think he was trying to snap me out of my hypnotic trance.
"What will…you do?" He said.
"This is all I can do." I replied, focused on the beautiful woman in the hospital
bed, the IV steadily pumping nourishment into her system. Indeed, what could I do? She was still alive, her pulse constant, no apparent danger was visible, but that was before you looked into her eyes. Somehow, her eyes had stayed open after the ordeal, and looking into them made me depressed and angry both. They used to be such vibrant, beautiful things, sparkling when she chuckled, but now they were glassy and sightless, stagnant pools of violet water that stared ahead into oblivion.
"I…I…I want to help her, but I don't know how. I'm not even sure if she can hear me, but I'm gonna stay here anyway. I don't want her to be alone!" I claimed. Tristan, acknowledging my desires, left the room soon after, knowing full well that being by her meant me and no one else.
It was after Tristan left that I finally went outside, got a single folding chair, and brought it back so I could sit closer to her. Perhaps I was afraid to sit so close to her before, worried that disturbing her would cause me to lose her forever. I moved the hair off of her face; she would have never had it like that if she could do something about it.
"Mai, why were…you doing this?" I asked her, knowing full well that she couldn't answer. I didn't care; the question deserved to be answered. Why did she go off and fight by herself? Didn't she know that I would always be there for her, no matter what? After Battle City and the trip to America, I promised that I would never let her go again, never would I let her fight her demons alone. But I failed her.
"DAMN!" I cursed, punching the wall. The resounding pain in my hand almost felt good. I looked at her again, now not able to tear myself away from those sightless, soul-stealing eyes. She looked right at me, but that was because I was standing in front of her. Moving closer, I inched closer to her face. She made no movements, no motions, she wasn't aware of my existence.
"I…don't know what to do. I'm not strong at all, not like you." I told her, hoping that somehow she heard me. She had said something similar to this when we went to America.
"You're not weak." I said, trying to stand up straight despite the back injury I sustained. She looked at me as if she wanted to believe it, and she probably did, but there was still a hint of depression in her eyes.
"Mai, you've become so strong. You're strong enough to do anything alone." I said, trying to comfort her.
"I don't care about being strong. What could is strength if no one can share it with you, if no one can benefit from it.
"I take from your strength." I said. This was no pretty phrase; I really did take my strength from her demeanor. She may have been a little nasty, but she had her reasons, just like everyone had reasons for everything.
"How can anyone take from my strength? None of them trust me to make my own choices." She was still acting tough, but she was fighting a losing battle with her own feelings, I could sense it.
"We…I can't speak for them, but I can speak for me." I placed my hands on her shoulders. "We all need to be strong, but I can't be. I'm not strong at all; I'm weak and fickle. So I take my strength from all of you. So please…I may not have much, but take some strength from me." I said. Mai was teary eyed and upset. We were alone together, and I wanted to kiss her so badly, but I kept my distance. I wouldn't do it unless she wanted it.
"I trust you, Mai." I was shouting at her unresponsive body. "I always have, so you can't…you can't do this. You can't just stay weak like this. You can hear me, can't you? Please, wake up, Mai. Wake up!" I shouted. Tears were brimming down my cheeks, and I didn't give two shits. They fell on her cheeks, dampening them, creating small glimmers when the overhead lights reflected in them.
"Mai, this weakness, this fear. It's…it's not like you. Where is this strength, your heart and courage. Please, don't lie there and stay defeated. If anything, please, please…slap me again!" I pleaded. I wouldn't care if she twisted my arms into an anatomically impossible position if it meant that she was up and doing it. I was still crying, bathing her face in salt water that would not stop from my eyes.
She stirred. Did it work? Please, God, whatever God is looking out for her, tell me it worked. Tell me that I'm on the right track. Tell me something, dammit, don't leave her now like everyone else. Her eyes blinked, and I nearly collapsed with joy. She was still laying still, but her eyes darted and moved around.
"Mai? Mai! Mai, I'm right here, come on, get up." I called, taking her hand, and wiping away my tears on her cheeks with the others. She moaned again, and moved her neck. She looked right at me, and the subtle smile that I loved so much start to form from her mouth.
"Joey." She said softly. I nearly fainted. She looked like she was back to normal. I wiped away the tears in my eyes as I held her hand, wanting time to stop right then and there.
"Yes, Mai?" I asked. I would have done anything for her.
"You're…crying." She said. I was still crying, I knew. I still didn't care.
"I…can't help it." I choked on my speech. "It just happens when these things happen."
"I…know, but you're not supposed to be crying." Mai said. I didn't answer, just held this position of me holding her hand.
"Quit…clamming up." Her voice was steadily gaining strength, and it sounded like she was returning to her old self. "You…always do that. Talk, don't listen." She said.
"Can…can you get up?" I asked. I didn't want to force her, but I wanted to see her back to herself. I couldn't stand seeing her lying like that, weak and helpless. And alone.
"Of course, first I gotta get this shit off of me." She tore out the IV and I pushed all the tables and stuff away. She was shoeless, which wasn't a surprise, I took off her shoes to make her more comfortable, and she steadily got her balance in stockinged feet.
She walked over easily, as if nothing had ever happened, but she claimed she felt air-headed so she sat down for a minute. She still felt a little dizzy when I offered to help her up, and as I helped her, she swept me off my feet into a hug.
"Mai…I'm…glad your all right." I said.
"That's all you can say?" She asked as a joke.
"No. I want to say that…" I started, but then I felt a sharp sting in my groin.
"Don't touch me like that!" Mai shouted. Yugi and the gang had apparently come into the room, and to save face, she kneed me. I gave out a yelp and fell to the floor, clutching my groin in pain. But I still smiled as I got up, and turned to the group as if it never happened.
I did, after all, ask her to slap me. Not exactly what she did, but Mai was never did exactly what you wanted. That was her charm.