90
"Sir?" Josh Maxwell approached Spike cautiously.
"What is it?" Spike sighed. He'd just finished picking out the team to guard them for the trip to dog-boy's dinner party.
"Well, it's just..," The man coughed, fidgeted, shuffled his feet. "I know you don't have any reason to trust me, but I'd like to be part of the bodyguard."
Spike shook his head. "Nothing doing," he said. "I'll lay you odds that fancy guard isn't going to be anything but show. I've got something else for you to do."
"Sir?" The old Josh Maxwell had probably never used the word. The new Josh seemed to rely on it as a crutch.
"Rose is going to be doing some inventory work down in the vaults," Spike informed him. "Lots of room down there, plenty of places to hide. I need a couple of lads to keep an eye on her. You'll do for one."
Josh was utterly stunned that Spike would allow him to guard the very lady he himself had once tried to kidnap. "If I might ask, sir, why are you trusting me to guard her?" There was an odd emphasis, almost a touch of awe attached to the final pronoun.
"Because you're still afraid that I'll drink your blood if you screw up," Spike said flatly. "And considering that it's Rose we're talking about, I just might. I figure that makes you more reliable than someone who thinks me having a soul means the Big Bad doesn't have fangs anymore."
"You can count on me." Josh still had occasional nightmares about Spike in game-face, offering to drink his blood. "And not just because of that."
"Then why?" Spike was curious now. He knew why he'd go to the ends of the earth for Rose, and Josh's reason had better be something different.
"The lady is something special," Josh mumbled, flushing a bit. "She keeps her cool no matter what." Spike reflected that Maxwell hadn't been around Rose since her pregnancy. "Besides, I never did hold with anyone messing with pregnant women or kids. That just ain't right."
"Consider yourself Rose's personal guard until she's done with the inventory," Spike ordered. "Maybe after, if I think she still needs to be watched."
"You can count on me," Josh repeated.
&&&&&&&&
"You look very smart, darling," Rose observed, as Spike twiddled with the ends of his tie, trying to figure out how to tie the damned thing. It wasn't a skill that he considered necessary to his happiness and well-being. Therefore, on the rare occasions he was called upon to wear one, it was always a battle to remember how to do it. He looked at Rose, and the sulking frown became one of consternation.
"What in the hell are you doing to yourself, sweetheart?" Spike started removing pins from Rose's hard-won coiffure.
"Hey!" she protested. "It took me forever to do that, love. And now, I don't have time to start all over."
"Good," Spike said. "What in the world possessed you to put it up like that anyway? It makes you look like a schoolmarm."
"It made me look taller," Rose muttered. "Now I'm going to spend the entire evening feeling like everyone is looming over me."
Spike laughed. "You don't need to be tall to impress anyone, luv," he replied, twining a lock of hair around his finger to make it curl. "You're pretty damn impressive already." He picked up her hairbrush and restored her tresses to their normal silky waves. "There, you look beautiful."
"You always say that," she mumbled, not entirely mollified.
"'Cause it's always true," Spike remarked. He bent and kissed her cheek. "If you're done here, pet, I'm sure that by now, grampaw is ready and pacing the floor waiting on us."
"You haven't tied your tie yet," Rose pointed out.
"Piss on it," he said rudely. He didn't even bother to take the thing off, just let the ends dangle. Jacket and tie indeed.
"You look lovely, Rose," Angel said when they emerged from the bedroom, and wondered why the compliment earned him a glare. He turned his attention to Spike. "Shit, Spike. Is it going to take you as long to learn to tie a tie as it did for you to learn to tie your shoes?"
"Can't bleeding see what I'm doing," Spike muttered. "I don't know why you're making all this fuss, anyway. Nobody's going to be looking at me."
Angel sighed. "Come here," he ordered. Spike rolled his eyes, but obeyed. Angel tried to tie the tie, but everything was basackwards for him. "Turn around," he instructed, and in the manner of a father teaching his son the intricacies of tying a tie, managed it. "Are we all ready, then?"
"Ready as I'll ever be," Spike commented, running a finger under his collar. If he didn't know better, and he couldn't swear that he did, he'd think the ponce was trying to strangle him.
"I guess so," Rose murmured. She was still in mourning over her lost, lamented hair-do.
"Then let's go," Angel said, offering Rose his arm. He sauntered off with her, leaving Spike to bring up the rear.
&&&&&&&&
"I didn't realize that Wolfram and Hart had a portal room," Rose remarked, finally having gotten over her sulk. "If I had known this was here when I became a specter, I might have tried to use it to communicate with the others."
"You're not complaining about how things turned out, are you?" Spike asked. He was sulking now, with the pouf swaggering around with Rose on his arm like she was his bird instead of Spike's.
"Of course I'm not, darling," she replied. She disengaged herself from Angel and slipped her arm through Spike's. When he didn't lighten up immediately, she whispered something in his ear that caused a smirky grin to cross his features. Angel decided that he didn't want to know what she'd said to cheer him up.
When they got to the portal room, there were six of the ops men waiting to escort them.
"I hope you think that two apiece is enough," Spike observed. "I figure that if we need more than two apiece, we're probably buggered anyway."
"Probably," Angel agreed. He didn't like the notion of bodyguards in the first place. He was the one that did the guarding. He turned to the men. "You guys just stay alert for trouble, but don't go making it," he directed them. "And if something does happen, don't worry about me and Spike, we can take care of ourselves. Your main concern is getting Rose back here safe and sound."
"And if any of you mucks that one up, he won't live long enough to regret it," Spike added.
Angel took Rose's other arm, so that he and Spike flanked her. Then, the three of them stepped into the portal with the ops men following close behind.
&&&&&&&
Kraj was inspecting the banquet hall, making sure that everything was in order. When he lifted a cover from one tray, though, his features suffused with rage. "Come here!" he ordered the first servant that came within range. "This will not do." He gestured towards the dish, which was comprised of a humanoid infant, displayed and garnished much in the manner of a roast, suckling pig. "It looks too much like them," he explained impatiently. "Remove it at once. Lord M'rek will not be pleased if you insult his honored guests."
The servant obeyed without comment, not surprising, since like all the rest, he had had his tongue removed at a tender age.
Kraj redoubled his efforts, checking under each lid, then venturing into the kitchen to prevent any more such outrageous social gaffes. Luckily, that had been the only one. Witless underlings, Kraj thought. He glanced over the arrangements again. It looked a little odd, with such a small section of the long table to be occupied. The hall was meant to accommodate large numbers of guests, but tonight his Lordship dined alone with the three demons, with none of his own kind about save for Kraj, the humble shadow that hovered by his shoulder. He spared a moment to wonder where the security detachment would be, then decided that he didn't care. He had been given no orders along those lines, and so, took no initiative. He went to see how the dolts were faring arraying Lord M'rek to greet his guests.
&&&&&&&&&
"You will seat the female.., Rose," M'rek amended. "To my right. Give them to understand that she is the honored guest."
"A female?" Kraj tried not to show his outrage. But then, none of the off-dimension creatures were truly deserving of the honor. "If my Lord so orders," he replied weakly.
"I do so order," M'rek said sternly. "Have you ordered a servant killed and drained that the vampires might dine as well?"
"No, most august Lord," Kraj answered. "I have been given to understand that the souled ones drink only animal's blood. Our servants have too much the appearance of humans. Instead, I have ordered the blood from one of the grazing herd beasts."
M'rek appraised his reflection in the mirror, and made a minute adjustment to a heavy, bejeweled pectoral. "Have you had word from the scholars regarding The Powers That Be?"
"Regretfully, no, oh great M'rek," Kraj whimpered. "I have of a necessity been busied with the preparations for your guests. And a good thing that I have been," he was emboldened to add. "Else the demons might well have been mortally offended."
"Explain to me," M'rek demanded. And Kraj filled him in on the ruinous mistake that had been made by servants who had merely been told to serve the best of everything, and given no detailed instructions. It had the desired effect, though, to make Kraj look good. He was ever on the alert to make himself look good. His life depended on it.
&&&&&&&&
The portal opened to admit Rose and her retinue, there to be met by the ever groveling and subservient, Kraj.
"Greetings to you all." He tried to beam at them genially, but his histrionic talents fell a bit short of the mark. "Lord M'rek is pleased beyond measure that you have deigned to accept his invitation. If you will follow me, I will escort you into his august and serene presence."
He led the group to the banquet hall, keeping up a flow of amiable, inane chatter all the while. Angel and Spike were silent, merely because they had nothing to say. Neither one had ever been much on small talk. Rose was in awe at the sheer scale of things. She felt positively dwarfed by the immensity of it all. She clutched Spike's arm with both hands as if anchoring herself to him.
If Rose had felt dwarfed before, she felt almost microbial when seated in the chair meant for beings such as their host. She reflected that all three of them could have fit into it. All right, that might be a bit of a squeeze. But certainly she and Spike could have fit with no problem. Not that they ever had a problem with proximity. But the scale also removed the two vampires from her. Spike was seated across the wide expanse of the table, with Angel at his side, and the scowl on his face spoke volumes. For form's sake, she gave him a warning look, but her heart wasn't really in it. She'd rather have him right beside her if she had her choice. But it was just for the evening, she reminded herself. The ops men, rather than trying to cover the entire echoing chamber, merely stood at a distance from the table, three to a side.
"So good of you to join me." M'rek appeared from behind an elaborately woven tapestry, resplendent in jewels and silks. "Shall we begin?"
Kraj served M'rek, and, at his Lord's direction, Rose as well. M'rek went out of his way to charm her, flattering and seeing that she got the best of everything. The vampires he scarcely acknowledged.
Angel and Spike sipped cautiously at the blood in the elaborate goblets in front of them and exchanged a glance. Blood it was, but there was something off about the taste. It may simply have been a difference in chemistry from crossing dimensions, then again, it might not. Spike, never too keen to accept M'rek's hospitality in the first place was silently fuming over the way that the jackal-like demon fawned over Rose.
Rose felt more than a little uncomfortable from M'rek's attentions. Especially since he was ignoring her escort. She had been given to understand that they were all his guests, but he was acting as if they were merely stage props. But she seldom found it in her to be rude, and most especially now, when she was feeling intimidated and nervous and knowing that she had to keep her company manners polished.
Angel took the opportunity to study M'rek and Kraj. He didn't mind being left out of the small talk, and being seated across the table from Rose meant he had a clear field of vision should something threaten her. He could practically feel the anger radiating in waves from Spike, but as long as his wayward grandchilde kept his mouth shut, he was willing to ignore it. Spike took everything so personally. He just hoped that the younger vampire would stop seething long enough to do some observing of his own. When it came to sorting out motives and feelings, there was none better than Spike. He often picked up on the things that Angel had to admit he missed.
The meal dragged on interminably, and Angel had to put a restraining hand on Spike's arm when M'rek began feeding Rose choice tidbits. He figured it was just another custom in this dimension. A way of honoring a guest.
M'rek was delighted when Rose accepted food from his hand, just as all his favored pets did. She shouldn't take too much training at all. Perhaps he would let her live after she was delivered of her young.
&&&&&&&&&
The contingent from Wolfram and Hart gratefully re-entered the portal at the end of the night. Angel figured that the minute they came out on the other side, Spike would probably start ranting and raving. He had to admit that the cocky Brit had held it in all night, and if pressed would even possibly bring himself to congratulate him on his self-control. But he knew that after having the fuse burning all night, the explosion was inevitable.
"Bloody uppity mutt," he muttered. "Where's he get off, feeding Rose like a baby?"
Angel just barely managed to keep from pointing out that Spike had done so himself upon occasion. That wasn't what Spike wanted to hear just now. And, he had to confess that the situations were not identical. "I'm sure it was just a way of honoring a guest," he said soothingly. "Instead of pissing and moaning about it, you ought to be telling Rose what a good job she did in keeping our client happy."
Spike gave an inelegant grunt. "'Course she did," he growled. "If she hadn't, dog-boy wouldn't have been drooling over her all night." He looked at Rose, who had determined to stay out of it as much as possible. "Did the food agree with you, luv?"
"It seemed to, why?" Rose wondered. "Was there something wrong with the blood they served you?"
"Didn't taste.., right," Spike remarked. It was far short of the way he felt, but he couldn't quite find the right words to express what he meant.
"How did you get rid of it?" Angel asked. He'd surreptitiously emptied his into a vase of flowers. It hadn't been all that difficult to do, seeing as how their host's attention had been largely focused on Rose.
"I always knew there had to be some reason to have potted plants about," Spike said casually. "Better than your flower vase. They're gonna notice that when they clean up after."
"I had to make do with what I could reach," Angel protested. "There weren't any plants near me." He let them into the apartment, loosening his tie as he let them proceed him. Spike's had disappeared on the trip from the portal room. "Do you two want to watch a movie or something?" He headed for the living room.
"Knock yourself out," Spike replied. "We've got better things to do, don't we, pet?" Arm around Rose's waist, he swaggered into the bedroom.