Kokoro no Hitan
The ice that had melted from around my heart flowed throughout my body and sent waves of goosebumps over my flesh with the chills it brought.
I stayed where Kyo and Yuki left me. I had stopped crying, but I was still hunched over my knees, hugging my chest. I was trying to catch my breath, I had been sobbing so much.
Now that the ice was gone, and the thirst for vengence had melted along with it, the searing pain of lonliness crept into my heart.
I don't want to be alone. The thought echoed endlessly. I don't want to be alone.
Clutching one arm in the grasp of another, I managed to somehow raise myself to my feet. Upon doing so I slowly made my way to Kagura's funeral.
I gently pushed open the door and walked down the aisle. I would have been crying if I hadn't already sqeezed every last drop of moisture out of my eyes.
I walked shakily towards her coffin.
The people, the service, everything was blurred except for that one object, that one object that I saw every detail of. The delicate carvings, the shine of the satin lining, the all-too-pale face of the once vibrant jewel that lay inside.
"Kagura," I whispered. I was leaning against the side of the coffin for support. "I loved you. I love you. I...wanted to tell you...so badly...But you left me..." I pushed a strand of hair behind one of her ears. "Yuki doesn't matter to me anymore, Kagura. You're the only one I want." Without even thinking, I bent over the edge of the coffin and lightly brushed my lips against hers. They were so cold...Sayoonara.
I looked at her one last time, still bent over her, before I straightened up, turned around, and walked out of the room.
Maybe people had been looking at me, I don't know. Everything except that coffin was soo blurry. The sounds, the colors, even the smells, all the edges blurred together, one spectrum into the other.
Before I knew it, I was beneath the tree Kagura had taken her last breath under. I looked up longingly at its branches and began to climb.
-Hatsuharu Sohma
~~~
I watched Hatsuharu as he walked down the aisle with the empty eyes of a zombie. No one else moved, all we did was watch, everyone frozen to their seats. Once he had left, a wave of panic swept over me. Just where would he be going anyway?
I grabbed my blazer, which I had hung on the back of the chair, and tore out of the room.
When I made it outside, the sunlight temporarily blinded me for a moment, the contrast between that darkened room and the afternoon sun was startling.
The rustle of leaves from a nearby tree caught my attention. There was no wind. Not even a small bit, and the motion that I had caught out of the corner of my eye had been far to great for it to be caused by the weight of a mere squirrel.
I raced toward the tree. "Hatsuharu! What are you doing?! Get down!"
He looked at me, but it was as if he couldn't see me. His eyes were blank. And he smiled. He smiled as he turned his back to me and let go of the branch he had been using to balance himself. And then he jumped, but it seemed more like he let himself fall...He fell straight to the ground, head first.
The sickening crack that reverberated in the air afterward made my stomach lurch.
I fell to my knees.
He wasn't the only one who had lost someone. Kana...
"Hatsuharu...," I whispered. "You weren't the only one who lived in pain, you know?...We...all of the cursed of the Sohma family...bare a terrible pain in our hearts...Why did you have to give up?...Why?..."
-Hatori Sohma
~~~
The ice that had melted from around my heart flowed throughout my body and sent waves of goosebumps over my flesh with the chills it brought.
I stayed where Kyo and Yuki left me. I had stopped crying, but I was still hunched over my knees, hugging my chest. I was trying to catch my breath, I had been sobbing so much.
Now that the ice was gone, and the thirst for vengence had melted along with it, the searing pain of lonliness crept into my heart.
I don't want to be alone. The thought echoed endlessly. I don't want to be alone.
Clutching one arm in the grasp of another, I managed to somehow raise myself to my feet. Upon doing so I slowly made my way to Kagura's funeral.
I gently pushed open the door and walked down the aisle. I would have been crying if I hadn't already sqeezed every last drop of moisture out of my eyes.
I walked shakily towards her coffin.
The people, the service, everything was blurred except for that one object, that one object that I saw every detail of. The delicate carvings, the shine of the satin lining, the all-too-pale face of the once vibrant jewel that lay inside.
"Kagura," I whispered. I was leaning against the side of the coffin for support. "I loved you. I love you. I...wanted to tell you...so badly...But you left me..." I pushed a strand of hair behind one of her ears. "Yuki doesn't matter to me anymore, Kagura. You're the only one I want." Without even thinking, I bent over the edge of the coffin and lightly brushed my lips against hers. They were so cold...Sayoonara.
I looked at her one last time, still bent over her, before I straightened up, turned around, and walked out of the room.
Maybe people had been looking at me, I don't know. Everything except that coffin was soo blurry. The sounds, the colors, even the smells, all the edges blurred together, one spectrum into the other.
Before I knew it, I was beneath the tree Kagura had taken her last breath under. I looked up longingly at its branches and began to climb.
-Hatsuharu Sohma
~~~
I watched Hatsuharu as he walked down the aisle with the empty eyes of a zombie. No one else moved, all we did was watch, everyone frozen to their seats. Once he had left, a wave of panic swept over me. Just where would he be going anyway?
I grabbed my blazer, which I had hung on the back of the chair, and tore out of the room.
When I made it outside, the sunlight temporarily blinded me for a moment, the contrast between that darkened room and the afternoon sun was startling.
The rustle of leaves from a nearby tree caught my attention. There was no wind. Not even a small bit, and the motion that I had caught out of the corner of my eye had been far to great for it to be caused by the weight of a mere squirrel.
I raced toward the tree. "Hatsuharu! What are you doing?! Get down!"
He looked at me, but it was as if he couldn't see me. His eyes were blank. And he smiled. He smiled as he turned his back to me and let go of the branch he had been using to balance himself. And then he jumped, but it seemed more like he let himself fall...He fell straight to the ground, head first.
The sickening crack that reverberated in the air afterward made my stomach lurch.
I fell to my knees.
He wasn't the only one who had lost someone. Kana...
"Hatsuharu...," I whispered. "You weren't the only one who lived in pain, you know?...We...all of the cursed of the Sohma family...bare a terrible pain in our hearts...Why did you have to give up?...Why?..."
-Hatori Sohma
~~~