Kokoro no Hitan
It felt like the past was coming back to haunt us. Tohru wouldn't leave her room. She just seemed to get worse and worse. Her flame to live was dying the same way Kagura's was, slowly flickering out by the wind of depression.
By the third day I couldn't take it anymore. We had all tried talking to her, but she listened to us with deaf ears. All she did was lay in bed, under her blankets, as the days and nights passed by. I had had enough. I went upstairs with leek porridge with the idea of forcing it down her throat. I did not want to lose her the same way I had lost Kagura.
Yuki looked at me with shock as I walked by him, but must have thought I was doing the right thing, because he didn't stop me as I walked up the stairs.
I opened the door to Tohru's room and stepped inside with my tray, carefully closing the door behind me.
I sat down the tray that held the food I had prepared on a stand beside her bed. I didn't wear goggles and a face mask this time.
"Eat," I said monotonously as I stood behind the tray, looking at her. There was no response. Her back was to me. "Eat," I said again. Still no response.
I walked in front of the stand and leaned over her. "Eat, Tohru." Nothing.
I was getting desperate. I kneeled on the bed and rolled her over. "Tohru, you have to eat." She looked at me with blank eyes.
I couldn't take it anymore. I snapped. I placed one of my knees on either side of Tohru's own and leaned over her. I took a spoonful of porridge and held it up to her. "Eat." There was nothing.
I forced it into her mouth. "Swallow." Her eyes were still blank. "Goddamit Tohru! Swallow the stupid porridge!" Nothing.
I pinched her nose. Now she either had to swallow it, or drown.
With relief, I watched as she swallowed it, barely catching the tears that were building up in her eyes.
I sat back a bit as I scooped up another spoonful out of the bowl. She ate that one, and the next. I didn't give her too much, knowing that it wouldn't be of any use to feed her and then have her stomach throw it up later.
Yuki's and Shigure's lips twitched in an attempt to smile as I placed the empty bowl in the sink.
***
This went on for a couple of days, until it came to the point where I could physically notice that she was regaining her strength.
Slowly she came out of it. Briefly, and then more often, the light returned to her eyes.
I helped her through the entire time. I sat with her when she cried. Hugged her, even though I knew the cost, and slept by her side as a trusty cat when there were no other ways to comfort her. She would always smile when she looked into the cat's eyes. Maybe there was something true in that statement I had heard long ago, that animals help people get over their grief, that they help people to heal.
After a month, she was walking around again, and after a few more her precious smile was back, and the dark clouds that had settled over that Sohma house finally dissipated to show clear, sunny skies.
A year later, Tohru had completely recovered. Her smile was as bright as ever, and the grief that had once ruled her heart was still somewhat there, but controlled so that it didn't control her.
And let me tell you, you have no idea how good it felt, and still feels, to see her smile once again.
But then something happened, something we all should have expected, but had forgotten about in that year, and those following, when we were all healing. The curse was still upon the Sohma family after all, and the boar and the ox couldn't so soon be completely forgotten.
-Kyo Sohma
It felt like the past was coming back to haunt us. Tohru wouldn't leave her room. She just seemed to get worse and worse. Her flame to live was dying the same way Kagura's was, slowly flickering out by the wind of depression.
By the third day I couldn't take it anymore. We had all tried talking to her, but she listened to us with deaf ears. All she did was lay in bed, under her blankets, as the days and nights passed by. I had had enough. I went upstairs with leek porridge with the idea of forcing it down her throat. I did not want to lose her the same way I had lost Kagura.
Yuki looked at me with shock as I walked by him, but must have thought I was doing the right thing, because he didn't stop me as I walked up the stairs.
I opened the door to Tohru's room and stepped inside with my tray, carefully closing the door behind me.
I sat down the tray that held the food I had prepared on a stand beside her bed. I didn't wear goggles and a face mask this time.
"Eat," I said monotonously as I stood behind the tray, looking at her. There was no response. Her back was to me. "Eat," I said again. Still no response.
I walked in front of the stand and leaned over her. "Eat, Tohru." Nothing.
I was getting desperate. I kneeled on the bed and rolled her over. "Tohru, you have to eat." She looked at me with blank eyes.
I couldn't take it anymore. I snapped. I placed one of my knees on either side of Tohru's own and leaned over her. I took a spoonful of porridge and held it up to her. "Eat." There was nothing.
I forced it into her mouth. "Swallow." Her eyes were still blank. "Goddamit Tohru! Swallow the stupid porridge!" Nothing.
I pinched her nose. Now she either had to swallow it, or drown.
With relief, I watched as she swallowed it, barely catching the tears that were building up in her eyes.
I sat back a bit as I scooped up another spoonful out of the bowl. She ate that one, and the next. I didn't give her too much, knowing that it wouldn't be of any use to feed her and then have her stomach throw it up later.
Yuki's and Shigure's lips twitched in an attempt to smile as I placed the empty bowl in the sink.
***
This went on for a couple of days, until it came to the point where I could physically notice that she was regaining her strength.
Slowly she came out of it. Briefly, and then more often, the light returned to her eyes.
I helped her through the entire time. I sat with her when she cried. Hugged her, even though I knew the cost, and slept by her side as a trusty cat when there were no other ways to comfort her. She would always smile when she looked into the cat's eyes. Maybe there was something true in that statement I had heard long ago, that animals help people get over their grief, that they help people to heal.
After a month, she was walking around again, and after a few more her precious smile was back, and the dark clouds that had settled over that Sohma house finally dissipated to show clear, sunny skies.
A year later, Tohru had completely recovered. Her smile was as bright as ever, and the grief that had once ruled her heart was still somewhat there, but controlled so that it didn't control her.
And let me tell you, you have no idea how good it felt, and still feels, to see her smile once again.
But then something happened, something we all should have expected, but had forgotten about in that year, and those following, when we were all healing. The curse was still upon the Sohma family after all, and the boar and the ox couldn't so soon be completely forgotten.
-Kyo Sohma