Kokoro no Hitan
I felt everyone who heard the word jump. A word that hadn't been uttered in years, that everyone had tried to forget, had tried to erase since they saw it on that tombstone those too few years ago.
I felt the strength drain out of me with the rest of my remaining color.
"Ka...gura...?" My eyes had lost all of their light.
Haru shook his head and looked at me. "Huh?...Who's that?...The name sounds familiar..."
-Tohru Sohma
~~~
The name drew my attention as well. For a second, I had thought it was my own, for I felt something deep inside me grab hold of the name and bond to it....Or maybe that bond had been there before...It was like I had heard the word a thousand times...Like it was mine...My own...My name...
But...it wasn't...Was it?...Kaga....was my name...right?
I was scared. I wrapped my arms around Harusaki, I didn't want to let him go. Something inside me, something burrowed deep inside my heart, didn't want to leave him. I loved him...I don't know if it was the kind the adults talk about, but our connection was definately deep, and I didn't want to leave him...Not ever.
-Kaga Sohma
~~~
My thoughts of anger vanished, and I felt normal once again.
"Kagura..." I brought a hand up to my face. "Why does that name sound familiar?"
I turned my head to look behind me, at Kaga who was gripping me tightly. Then my eyes shifted to look at Hatori, my head still turned, my hand partially hiding my face. "Why is it so familiar?"
Hatori's face had never been this pale before. But I was too worried, my thoughts wandering too far, to care about him at a time like this.
-Haru Sohma
~~~
I had heard him call her that before, but had truly thought nothing of it. It was when they were younger, when they were first learning to speak after they had come to me.
I hadn't truly thought they were reincarnations, but I had mumbled the word under my breath when I heard Haru call Kaga "Kagura." My heart had skipped a beat the first time I heard him use that word.
I swung my chair around, because it was one of the office ones that turns, and looked, questioningly, at Harusaki and Kaga. They both looked back at me and said,"What?" and then continued to play with their blocks as if nothing had happened. I had closed my eyes and shook my head before I turned back around.
Now it had happened again, and this time it wasn't merely coincidence.
-Hatori Sohma
~~~
My grip around Haru tightened, and I pushed my head harder against his back, my face looking toward the floor. "Nee, Haru?...You're not going to let them take me...are you?"
I felt one of his hands on my shoulder. "I will protect you, Kagura."
He took a step backward. I looked up to see why. Hatori had his hand out, reaching toward me and Haru and Haru was doing as he promised.
"Leave her alone."
"I can't," Hatori sighed. "Akito's orders. She has to go live with Shigure. Besides, I can't raise her much longer anyway. She needs one of her own gender to look up to, and there's no one around here that can spare enough time to be that type of role model for her."
"Then I'll go with her," Haru said unflinchingly. He was like a two-ton boulder. It was going to be hard to move him. "There has to be someone I can look up to there as well." He looked at Tohru. I could tell because I felt his body shift. "Nee, aren't you living with Kyo and Shigure-san?" He looked back at Hatori. "Then why can't I move in there as well?"
"There's not enough room." I saw a shadow pass over us and then shrink to the floor. Hatori must have been kneeling down in front of us. "There's already Kyo and Yuki living at Shigure's house, never mind Tohru, and then Shigure himself. The house is going to be over-full with Kaga being added, never mind another person."
"I can share a room with Kaga. We have this far." I nodded in agreement. This was true. How could he be a burden if we stayed together?
Hatori shook his head. The shadow that was cast between Haru's feet was moving side to side. "No. You two can't live together any longer. You're starting to grow up and soon that's going to be unacceptable."
Haru moved, widening his stance. He was trying to be, to act, tough, still trying to protect me, keeping to his word. "Why?...That's not fair!" I could feel him getting angry. "You can't so this!" He raised his fists and then slammed them into his sides. Then, something inside him shifted, something that made my heart go cold, something that gave me chills. The attitude in his voice changed. It was now deadly serious, like it had been far earlier in the conflict. "I won't let you take her away."
-Kaga Sohma
~~~
I felt everyone who heard the word jump. A word that hadn't been uttered in years, that everyone had tried to forget, had tried to erase since they saw it on that tombstone those too few years ago.
I felt the strength drain out of me with the rest of my remaining color.
"Ka...gura...?" My eyes had lost all of their light.
Haru shook his head and looked at me. "Huh?...Who's that?...The name sounds familiar..."
-Tohru Sohma
~~~
The name drew my attention as well. For a second, I had thought it was my own, for I felt something deep inside me grab hold of the name and bond to it....Or maybe that bond had been there before...It was like I had heard the word a thousand times...Like it was mine...My own...My name...
But...it wasn't...Was it?...Kaga....was my name...right?
I was scared. I wrapped my arms around Harusaki, I didn't want to let him go. Something inside me, something burrowed deep inside my heart, didn't want to leave him. I loved him...I don't know if it was the kind the adults talk about, but our connection was definately deep, and I didn't want to leave him...Not ever.
-Kaga Sohma
~~~
My thoughts of anger vanished, and I felt normal once again.
"Kagura..." I brought a hand up to my face. "Why does that name sound familiar?"
I turned my head to look behind me, at Kaga who was gripping me tightly. Then my eyes shifted to look at Hatori, my head still turned, my hand partially hiding my face. "Why is it so familiar?"
Hatori's face had never been this pale before. But I was too worried, my thoughts wandering too far, to care about him at a time like this.
-Haru Sohma
~~~
I had heard him call her that before, but had truly thought nothing of it. It was when they were younger, when they were first learning to speak after they had come to me.
I hadn't truly thought they were reincarnations, but I had mumbled the word under my breath when I heard Haru call Kaga "Kagura." My heart had skipped a beat the first time I heard him use that word.
I swung my chair around, because it was one of the office ones that turns, and looked, questioningly, at Harusaki and Kaga. They both looked back at me and said,"What?" and then continued to play with their blocks as if nothing had happened. I had closed my eyes and shook my head before I turned back around.
Now it had happened again, and this time it wasn't merely coincidence.
-Hatori Sohma
~~~
My grip around Haru tightened, and I pushed my head harder against his back, my face looking toward the floor. "Nee, Haru?...You're not going to let them take me...are you?"
I felt one of his hands on my shoulder. "I will protect you, Kagura."
He took a step backward. I looked up to see why. Hatori had his hand out, reaching toward me and Haru and Haru was doing as he promised.
"Leave her alone."
"I can't," Hatori sighed. "Akito's orders. She has to go live with Shigure. Besides, I can't raise her much longer anyway. She needs one of her own gender to look up to, and there's no one around here that can spare enough time to be that type of role model for her."
"Then I'll go with her," Haru said unflinchingly. He was like a two-ton boulder. It was going to be hard to move him. "There has to be someone I can look up to there as well." He looked at Tohru. I could tell because I felt his body shift. "Nee, aren't you living with Kyo and Shigure-san?" He looked back at Hatori. "Then why can't I move in there as well?"
"There's not enough room." I saw a shadow pass over us and then shrink to the floor. Hatori must have been kneeling down in front of us. "There's already Kyo and Yuki living at Shigure's house, never mind Tohru, and then Shigure himself. The house is going to be over-full with Kaga being added, never mind another person."
"I can share a room with Kaga. We have this far." I nodded in agreement. This was true. How could he be a burden if we stayed together?
Hatori shook his head. The shadow that was cast between Haru's feet was moving side to side. "No. You two can't live together any longer. You're starting to grow up and soon that's going to be unacceptable."
Haru moved, widening his stance. He was trying to be, to act, tough, still trying to protect me, keeping to his word. "Why?...That's not fair!" I could feel him getting angry. "You can't so this!" He raised his fists and then slammed them into his sides. Then, something inside him shifted, something that made my heart go cold, something that gave me chills. The attitude in his voice changed. It was now deadly serious, like it had been far earlier in the conflict. "I won't let you take her away."
-Kaga Sohma
~~~