[Things start off farcical, with Fred marvelling at the weirdness of the Scoobies and Connor nonchalantly discussing methods of torture. But midway through things get serious when the conversation turns to Gunn's killing of Fred's professor. Wes and Xander oddly find themselves in agreement, while disagreement between Wes and Angel threatens to explode into an argument over Wesley's role in Connor's abduction. In front of Connor.]

WILLOW: I can only imagine what Buffy will say when she finds out you have the hots for Cordy.

XANDER: Not to mention the fact that you're a daddy. Bet she'll be real pissed at you. Can't say that's a bad thing. Course, if she knew you were after Cordy, she might retaliate by trying to restart things with Spike. Now that WOULD be a bad thing. Perhaps we'll keep much of this visit to ourselves, okay Will?

WILLOW: I don't like hiding stuff from her. But she is under a lot of pressure, and we wouldn't want to distract her with lurid tales from LA. There is one thing she needs to know. I met a lawyer today who's suing the First Evil.

XANDER: You can't be serious.

WILLOW: She seemed to be very serious. See for yourself. [gives Xander envelope with legal briefs] She works for an evil law firm. It seems they have a beef with our Big Bad. Appears they own all the slogans we've been spouting off for the past couple months.

XANDER: They have a store at the mall? Grrr Argh, Incorporated? That's classic. So much cooler than First Evil.

WILLOW: She says she's got the goods on them, if we're willing to do some favors for her. Also, Angel - I did the locator spell. Your Beast hides out in Westwood.

CORDY: Always thought that part of town was tacky.

WILLOW: Lilah had her witches hack into my spell and steal the Beast's exact location. She seems eager to negotiate with you. Course you may not be eager to give her what she wants.

CONNOR: I could break into her house, put a knife to her throat, and threaten to kill her if she doesn't tell.

ANGEL: Son, we don't do things that way.

LORNE: We threaten people all the time. And she knows Connor's capable of doing it.

ANGEL: Which means she'll give us the goods before he has to resort to violence. This could work.

CONNOR: And if she doesn't I can tie her up and threaten to cut up other parts of her body. That should make her talk. After all, the more grievous the threat, the less violence you need to use.

ANGEL: True but, other parts? I don't wanna ask. Now son, these are just ideas. You would wouldn't actually ENJOY doing those things, would you?

CONNOR: Not to her.

LORNE: Never have I met anyone who can make vagueness so terrifying.

XANDER: Maybe you could do some wet work for us. Get us the info, help us save the world.

CONNOR: It wouldn't work a second time. I would have no credibility. She would know I couldn't kill her. I could torture her subordinates, go beyond threats and use actual pain to extract what you need.

LORNE: Personally, I think Gavin would look great on The Rack. Or maybe hanging by his toenails.

CORDY: Connor, have you put a lot of thought into these sorts of things?

CONNOR: No. I just learned by watching you guys threaten demons to make them talk. There are all those humans coming after me since I got here. But they're weak, and it's easy to make them talk. Demons, people - if they're evil, and they try to kill you, what's the difference?

WILLOW: Turns out your son's an idealist. Just like you. Only with different ideals.

XANDER: So this was an evil lawyer. An evil, demon lawyer? [smiles] Do they have lawyer demons?

WILLOW: She's human. An evil human.

WES: Though she can be a demon in the - never mind.

WILLOW: Evil but sexy. Actually, the evil part is what makes her interesting. Let's just say you'd love getting served by her.

CONNOR: I sure did.

WILLOW: Not serviced. Served, with a subpoena, or some other legal document. Good God! How long before this kid starts hanging out at the Playboy Mansion? Can't entirely blame ya, Connor. You've been living on the streets, seeing only the scummy side of life. Angel should have realized this. Throw an 18 year-old boy who knows almost nothing about this world onto the streets, to live with the runaways and the prostitutes and junkies. What were you thinking?

ANGEL: I had my reasons.

GUNN: Damn straight you had your reasons.

FRED: He imprisoned Angel in a watery grave and then lied about it for 3 months. What was Angel supposed to do?

XANDER: So he tried to kill his friends and loved ones. Who hasn't? [Lorne, Fred raise their hands]

LORNE: From now on I'm sleeping with the lights on.

FRED: Charles?

GUNN: My sister.

FRED: She was a vampire. So that doesn't count.

GUNN: Good point. I still see way too many hands up for comfort.

FRED: What is wrong with you Sunnydale people!!?

WILLOW: Look at Little Miss Perfect. Thinks she's all superior cause she never tried to kill her friends.

LORNE: The demons always say it's the PEOPLE ya gotta watch out for in that town. That's why it's a Hellmouth. You just scapegoat the demons rather than confront your own problems.

FRED: That's what it sounds like from what Willow told me. Ya'al don't need a Slayer. Ya need a shrink. Maybe a whole army of shrinks to quarantine your mass madness.

XANDER: Sure. Blame the victims. Make it seem like we bring evil on yourselves.

FRED: It's called taking responsibility for your own actions. If I do something wrong, I don't blame it on the fact that I was enslaved for 5 years in a demon dimension.

XANDER: You were what? For real?

WILLOW: Yep. Then she found the guy who put her and a lot of other people there. She was going to kill him, but Charles did it for her.

XANDER: That was very good of you, Gunn.

FRED: What!!? You're congratulating him for taking a human life?

XANDER: You didn't enjoy it, did you? Was it quick?

GUNN: No, I didn't. And yes, it was. He didn't feel a thing.

XANDER: Then I don't see the problem. What else were you going to do? Call the police, have him sent to prison? Something had to be done. Who else was in a position to do it?

ANGEL: Spoken like someone who's never taken a human life.

XANDER: Spoken like someone who's only taken INNOCENT human life. There's a huge difference. I know you and Buffy have this Prime Directive about only killing demons. But Prime Directives are made to be broken. They can't apply to every circumstance.

WES: Thank you Captain Kirk. I think what he is trying to say is that refusing to kill evil people can be a form of moral selfishness. You're refusing to kill because of what it might do to your soul, even if the murder serves the Greater Good and saves innocent lives.

ANGEL: Thanks for the ethics lesson, Wes. Let's hear you give me the one about how it's okay to betray your friends and kidnap someone else's kid.

[tense silence. Connor doesn't quite know what they're talking about. Wes doesn't want to say anything stupid. he takes his time. Fred, Cordy, Gunn and Lorne look very nervous. Willow knows what's up. Xander doesn't. But he can tell it's something serious.]

WES: Don't make this personal. I wasn't. I expressed an opinion which had nothing to do with you. If tearing into me makes you feel better, then go ahead. I can take it. I deserve far worse. But I don't think this is the proper forum for that kind of conversation.

[another long, tense pause. Connor has no idea what's going on.]

ANGEL: Don't pretend to offer yourself up as a martyr. I was just surprised to hear you agree with Xander. [smirks] Great minds think alike, I guess.

[Lorne, Cordy, Fred and Gunn breathe a sigh of relief. They didn't want Angel and Wesley to fight in front of the children (I mean child)]

WES: Just because Xander holds and opinion does not automatically mean it is incorrect.

XANDER: Thanks, Wes.

WES: I'm sure he believes water and oxygen are good things.

XANDER: Hey! You're making fun of me.

WES: Old habits are hard to break. To be serious, I wasn't talking about you, Angel. I was talking about Charles. There is a moral courage in what he did. Taking another's guilt upon oneself. Assuming responsibility for an unpleasant but necessary act. It is a sort of noble sacrifice.

ANGEL: How can murder EVER be noble or moral?

XANDER: Nothing like a dead guy trying to understand human nature. I think I know what Wesley's trying to say in his own fancy convoluted way. When you love someone, you want to be there for them. To protect them. Especially from themselves. Gunn did the right thing. I wish I could have done the same for Willow.

WILLOW: Xander you don't mean? I mean, you can mean what I think you mean?

XANDER: Someone had to do it. I was too chicken. Look what happened.

FRED: Never knew the pro-murder factions was so strong around here. Angel's the only man in this room who's not part of it. Except, Angel's not exactly a man. So it's unanimous. The men are for murder.

LORNE: I'm anti-murder. Except, well, I'm also not a man. Bloodthirsty humans. You really are savages compared to us enlightened demons.