The scene opens on darkness.
[Silence.]
The bandleader is SUPPOSED to announce the opening of the show ...but our man is nowhere to be found.
A spotlight scans around until it finds said bandleader, YADA MASARU, who's reclining lazily against a wall with his eyes closed.
MASARU: Find someone else to do it.
A second spotlight opens on the stage, as if giving Masaru a silent order to get up there.
MASARU: (yawn) Can't you see I'm busy not caring abou- GAH!!!
The entire wall behind him bursts with white-hot flashbulbs that spell out "CHICAGO MAHOU". Poor, unsuspecting Masaru is hurled forward into an inconveniently placed orchestra pit. (Whether *Mister* Yada wants to or not, this story has begun.)
*********CHICAGO MAHOU*********
________________________________________________________________________
Some dark red floodlights come up to reveal the stage in a nightclub
MASARU: (looking fried and frizzled) Eh-heh-heh... ahem, ladies and gentleman, our first act of the evening: Ms. Segawa Onpu performing a duet number alone- because, well, she's just that good. Muh-uhh (belches out a puff of smoke and falls over, unconscious).
____________________________________
A trapdoor in the stage slides open- SEGAWA ONPU daintily arises from the aperture. [She's dressed in her witch outfit from season one.] The orchestra strikes up a lively jazz tune and the number begins:
[Musical parody of "All That Jazz"]
ONPU: (singing)
Come on, babe
Why don't we cast a spell?
And rhythm tap...!
I'm gonna sport my dress
Before the final bell
And rhythm tap...!
Climb aboard
The Majokai awaits
Where the flan is cold
But the taiyaki bakes
It's the place you can test
Your musical best
And rhy-thm... tap!
____________________________________
While the music and partying goes on, the attention now shifts to a girl in the audience, HARUKAZE DOREMI, as she shyly inches towards the boy of her waking dreams.
DOREMI: Igarashi-kun... I- I was hoping to see you again. There's something- something important I need to tell you.
The older lad sitting on the barstool remains quiet.
DOREMI: (gulps) Y-you must know that you alone hold this schoolgirl's heart captive. You must know you're the only one for me!
Igarashi still says nothing. That's probably because Doremi was standing 20 feet away and doesn't have his attention in the slightest bit.
DOREMI: (to herself) This is the part where he says, "Yes, yes Doremi-chan, I do-"
IGARASHI: Maki-san! I've been waiting for you!
A young girl, about the same age as him, shows up. He greets her with a kiss.
DOREMI: (snaps back to reality) ...EHH??!
____________________________________
ONPU: (singing)
Find some beads
And throw away your chores
And rhythm tap...!
It's fun and games
When you've got the source
And rhythm tap...!
Grab your broom
We're gonna sweep the sky
And cast that evil homework
Beyond an eagle's eye
'Cause in the stratosphere
How can it interfere?
So rhythm tap...!
____________________________________
MAKI: Igarashi-kun... this place is awful loud. Do you know where we can have more privacy?
Still watching from afar, Doremi squeezes her eyes shut; she also clasps her hands together in prayer.
DOREMI: Don't say yes, don't say yes, don't say...
IGARASHI: Hai, I know a place we can go.
The cute couple leaves, hand-in-hand.
DOREMI: (eyes are like twin waterfalls) WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO MEEE...?
____________________________________
ONPU: (singing)
Do- the funky chicken as a cockatoo
And rhythm tap!
Do- a little hotfoot 'cause you're a kangaroo
And rhythm tap!
Doremi mutters some unkind words under her breath at the purple-haired performer before lurching out of the nightclub.
ONPU: (singing)
Twirl- into a magical stage
Hurl- away that minimum wage
Your daily life
Can barely suffice
So rhy-thm... tap...
____________________________________
[Cut to a nearby run-down building.]
Returning to her one-room apartment, Doremi wallows in self-pity. Once again, the fact that she's in the ass-end of society has come back to haunt her.
DOREMI: Once again, the fact that I exist in the ass-end of society has come back to-
There is a crashing noise outside followed by heavy footsteps. In a panicked flurry, Igarashi bursts in through the door of Doremi's room/apartment. No Maki though.
IGARASHI: You gotta hide me, Miss! Maki-san and I were just having a private moment in the hall and suddenly this scary old lady came out of nowhere and began freaking on us!
A harsh, angry voice is heard from down the hall.
SCARY OLD LADY (think Majocloth-scary): I'll show YOU old...!
Doremi just sits, blinking ...and then she realizes good fortune has come her way.
DOREMI: Yoouush!!! I knew-! I knew this day would come!!
IGARASHI: Um...?
With swift precision, Doremi reaches into her bureau drawer and pulls out a fancy-looking pinkish-transparent stick. The whole thing happens so quickly, it's almost like she's rehearsed this maneuver hundreds and hundreds of times. Hmm...
DOREMI: (waving the stick) Pirika piralala poporetu peperuto! Let Igarashi- kun's heart belong to Doremi!
Unfortunately... the magic spell took Doremi's words a little TOO literally and-
____________________________________
[Cut to an outside shot of the apartment building.]
DOREMI: (from within) Er, what's this soggy thing in my hands? ...GAH! EWWW!!!
____________________________________
[Back at the nightclub.]
ONPU: (singing)
No, it's not a dumb myth
Oh, my life's a plum with
That rhythm taaaaap...!
That tap!
[End of song]
The applause is cut short when a dozen police officers storm into the nightclub. Entering right behind the cops is the city's assistant district attorney, RINNO MASATO.
MASATO: Segawa Onpu! You are under arrest for suspicion of murder using mahou!
Everyone in the club gasps when they hear this.
Then there is awkward silence.
MASARU: (plays a "Bum, Bum, BUMMM" on his trumpet ...albeit poorly)
____________________________________
[To be continued.]
[Silence.]
The bandleader is SUPPOSED to announce the opening of the show ...but our man is nowhere to be found.
A spotlight scans around until it finds said bandleader, YADA MASARU, who's reclining lazily against a wall with his eyes closed.
MASARU: Find someone else to do it.
A second spotlight opens on the stage, as if giving Masaru a silent order to get up there.
MASARU: (yawn) Can't you see I'm busy not caring abou- GAH!!!
The entire wall behind him bursts with white-hot flashbulbs that spell out "CHICAGO MAHOU". Poor, unsuspecting Masaru is hurled forward into an inconveniently placed orchestra pit. (Whether *Mister* Yada wants to or not, this story has begun.)
*********CHICAGO MAHOU*********
________________________________________________________________________
Some dark red floodlights come up to reveal the stage in a nightclub
MASARU: (looking fried and frizzled) Eh-heh-heh... ahem, ladies and gentleman, our first act of the evening: Ms. Segawa Onpu performing a duet number alone- because, well, she's just that good. Muh-uhh (belches out a puff of smoke and falls over, unconscious).
____________________________________
A trapdoor in the stage slides open- SEGAWA ONPU daintily arises from the aperture. [She's dressed in her witch outfit from season one.] The orchestra strikes up a lively jazz tune and the number begins:
[Musical parody of "All That Jazz"]
ONPU: (singing)
Come on, babe
Why don't we cast a spell?
And rhythm tap...!
I'm gonna sport my dress
Before the final bell
And rhythm tap...!
Climb aboard
The Majokai awaits
Where the flan is cold
But the taiyaki bakes
It's the place you can test
Your musical best
And rhy-thm... tap!
____________________________________
While the music and partying goes on, the attention now shifts to a girl in the audience, HARUKAZE DOREMI, as she shyly inches towards the boy of her waking dreams.
DOREMI: Igarashi-kun... I- I was hoping to see you again. There's something- something important I need to tell you.
The older lad sitting on the barstool remains quiet.
DOREMI: (gulps) Y-you must know that you alone hold this schoolgirl's heart captive. You must know you're the only one for me!
Igarashi still says nothing. That's probably because Doremi was standing 20 feet away and doesn't have his attention in the slightest bit.
DOREMI: (to herself) This is the part where he says, "Yes, yes Doremi-chan, I do-"
IGARASHI: Maki-san! I've been waiting for you!
A young girl, about the same age as him, shows up. He greets her with a kiss.
DOREMI: (snaps back to reality) ...EHH??!
____________________________________
ONPU: (singing)
Find some beads
And throw away your chores
And rhythm tap...!
It's fun and games
When you've got the source
And rhythm tap...!
Grab your broom
We're gonna sweep the sky
And cast that evil homework
Beyond an eagle's eye
'Cause in the stratosphere
How can it interfere?
So rhythm tap...!
____________________________________
MAKI: Igarashi-kun... this place is awful loud. Do you know where we can have more privacy?
Still watching from afar, Doremi squeezes her eyes shut; she also clasps her hands together in prayer.
DOREMI: Don't say yes, don't say yes, don't say...
IGARASHI: Hai, I know a place we can go.
The cute couple leaves, hand-in-hand.
DOREMI: (eyes are like twin waterfalls) WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO MEEE...?
____________________________________
ONPU: (singing)
Do- the funky chicken as a cockatoo
And rhythm tap!
Do- a little hotfoot 'cause you're a kangaroo
And rhythm tap!
Doremi mutters some unkind words under her breath at the purple-haired performer before lurching out of the nightclub.
ONPU: (singing)
Twirl- into a magical stage
Hurl- away that minimum wage
Your daily life
Can barely suffice
So rhy-thm... tap...
____________________________________
[Cut to a nearby run-down building.]
Returning to her one-room apartment, Doremi wallows in self-pity. Once again, the fact that she's in the ass-end of society has come back to haunt her.
DOREMI: Once again, the fact that I exist in the ass-end of society has come back to-
There is a crashing noise outside followed by heavy footsteps. In a panicked flurry, Igarashi bursts in through the door of Doremi's room/apartment. No Maki though.
IGARASHI: You gotta hide me, Miss! Maki-san and I were just having a private moment in the hall and suddenly this scary old lady came out of nowhere and began freaking on us!
A harsh, angry voice is heard from down the hall.
SCARY OLD LADY (think Majocloth-scary): I'll show YOU old...!
Doremi just sits, blinking ...and then she realizes good fortune has come her way.
DOREMI: Yoouush!!! I knew-! I knew this day would come!!
IGARASHI: Um...?
With swift precision, Doremi reaches into her bureau drawer and pulls out a fancy-looking pinkish-transparent stick. The whole thing happens so quickly, it's almost like she's rehearsed this maneuver hundreds and hundreds of times. Hmm...
DOREMI: (waving the stick) Pirika piralala poporetu peperuto! Let Igarashi- kun's heart belong to Doremi!
Unfortunately... the magic spell took Doremi's words a little TOO literally and-
____________________________________
[Cut to an outside shot of the apartment building.]
DOREMI: (from within) Er, what's this soggy thing in my hands? ...GAH! EWWW!!!
____________________________________
[Back at the nightclub.]
ONPU: (singing)
No, it's not a dumb myth
Oh, my life's a plum with
That rhythm taaaaap...!
That tap!
[End of song]
The applause is cut short when a dozen police officers storm into the nightclub. Entering right behind the cops is the city's assistant district attorney, RINNO MASATO.
MASATO: Segawa Onpu! You are under arrest for suspicion of murder using mahou!
Everyone in the club gasps when they hear this.
Then there is awkward silence.
MASARU: (plays a "Bum, Bum, BUMMM" on his trumpet ...albeit poorly)
____________________________________
[To be continued.]