*Disclaimer*
I don't own anything. Not a god damn fucking thing. NOTHING!
Monkeys, Ninja Monkeys
*Disclaimer #2* IF YOUR FUCKING MIND MELTS IT ISN'T MY FAULT
*Note to Reader* If you are looking for an intelligent piece of writing, this isn't the stuff for you. Anybody who flames this is gay. Yep, gay. If you don't like this kind of story, fuck off. This is just a story with some fictional characters added to the Zelda universe.
As Link walked through the door into the Great Deku Tree, which incidentally was the trees huge ass mouth, he thought how good the tree must be at giving head. Preoccupied as he was with this, he didn't notice the huge coconut fly through the air and hit him in the scrotum.
"Ha, gotcha bitch!" Mat shouted.
"Can I rape him while he's down?" Jordan asked with a nasty gleam in his eye.
"Can't we just do what we came for? We need his help, and people tend to get pissed when you crush their nads," Joey pointed out.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP ALL OF YOU!" Fox bellowed, punching Jordan in the face. Softening his voice, he turned to Link, who was busy clutching his balls like a 14 year old boy trying to discover what semen was, and said, "Come with us through time and help us get rid of the Ninja Monkeys of the Sarcophagus of Left Nipplopolus, and I will give you some cream to help with the swelling that coconut is likely to cause." In too much pain to argue, Link nodded before turning blue and passing out.
Using his innate mage-power, Matt opened a door to their time, and dragged Link through it.
*Alright bitches, that's the prologue, and you may ask why we can go to Hyrule, or why we have a NINJA MONKEY INFESTATION, and I'm here to tell you, it doesn't fuckin matter. If it bothers you, I'm sorry, you anal- retentive freak*
Monkeys, Ninja Monkeys
*Disclaimer #2* IF YOUR FUCKING MIND MELTS IT ISN'T MY FAULT
*Note to Reader* If you are looking for an intelligent piece of writing, this isn't the stuff for you. Anybody who flames this is gay. Yep, gay. If you don't like this kind of story, fuck off. This is just a story with some fictional characters added to the Zelda universe.
As Link walked through the door into the Great Deku Tree, which incidentally was the trees huge ass mouth, he thought how good the tree must be at giving head. Preoccupied as he was with this, he didn't notice the huge coconut fly through the air and hit him in the scrotum.
"Ha, gotcha bitch!" Mat shouted.
"Can I rape him while he's down?" Jordan asked with a nasty gleam in his eye.
"Can't we just do what we came for? We need his help, and people tend to get pissed when you crush their nads," Joey pointed out.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP ALL OF YOU!" Fox bellowed, punching Jordan in the face. Softening his voice, he turned to Link, who was busy clutching his balls like a 14 year old boy trying to discover what semen was, and said, "Come with us through time and help us get rid of the Ninja Monkeys of the Sarcophagus of Left Nipplopolus, and I will give you some cream to help with the swelling that coconut is likely to cause." In too much pain to argue, Link nodded before turning blue and passing out.
Using his innate mage-power, Matt opened a door to their time, and dragged Link through it.
*Alright bitches, that's the prologue, and you may ask why we can go to Hyrule, or why we have a NINJA MONKEY INFESTATION, and I'm here to tell you, it doesn't fuckin matter. If it bothers you, I'm sorry, you anal- retentive freak*