AUTHOR'S NOTE: I somehow managed to get two copies of the first chapter
onto the web by accident, titled as different stories, but this one is the
one I'll be adding on to. Dis chapta's foah Izzy, cuz a)she rocks me sock,
too! an' b) She's da one who got "Smells Like Teen Spirit" stuck in me
head!
DISCLAIMER: I own Red. I don't own any lyrics, or any newsies, or Kloppah, or the lodging house, or New York, or . . . well, you get my drift.
I don't know how late it was when Race and I finished with all his papes. The sun was almost gone, but we could still see fine. Businesses were beginning to turn out their lights one boy one as owners locked up for the night. A man came out to light the streetlamps.
When I was small, I thought the lights magically lit themselves, knowing what the right time was to come on, whether it was summer or winter. I had never once seen anyone light or douse them, and now, watching for the first time as an old man reached up to bring each one to life, it unnerved me. I turned to Race.
"So, how'd I do on my first day?"
Race smiled and shoved his hand in his pocket. I heard the jingle of a sizable amount of coins clinking together. He brought out a handful of the coins and held the out to me. "Not bad at all for a stahta. A new face around here'll be good foah business. Two hands." I cupped mine together as he handed them over, careful not to drop anything.
"You got a place?" I shook my head, my eyes downcast. " Great. You get ta stay at da newsie lodgin' house. Ya gotta pay rent, but it ain't much an' Kloppah'll give ya some time ta get on yer feet befoah he asks foah much."
"Who's Kloppah?"
"Da guy who owns da place." Race's face lit up as he remembered something and smiled mischievously. "Yer gonna have one helluva time tanight, boy!"
I tried to look curiously innocent. "Why?"
"KARAOKE NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Snitch jumped off his bunk and landed next to me. At least, I think it was Snitch. Race had introduced me to everyone and they'd been real nice about everything so far, but I was having a bit of trouble keeping track of all the names. My usually-excellent memory was not kicking in.
My eyes widened. "KARAOKE?!" I had been warned about the madness of the male gender many, many times, but never in my entire life did I expect this . . .
"Yep!"
I think it was Kid Blink who told everybody to "shuddup and siddown" at that point. A makeshift curtain had been created by tying a rope between two bedposts and draping a bunch of wrinkled sheets over it. He grinned eagerly and cleared his throat, "Allow me ta intraduce da foist act. Bumlets is gonna sing some song an' is annoyin'ly refusin' ta tell me what it is EVEN THOUGH DA WHOLE POINT O' DA ANNOUNCA IS TA ANNOUNCE DA NEXT SONG!!!!"
There was a muffled, "Aw, be quiet" from behind the curtain. Kid Blink rolled eyes and yanked back the sheets to reveal Bumlets sitting on a top bunk, his legs dangling off the edge. In his hands he held a . . . well, it was a . . .
"Bumlets, what the hell is that crap yer holdin'?" Jack finally decided to call out.
Bumlets was very hurt. "It's a Kleenex box with a Quilted Quicker Picker Upper From Bounty tube on the top and a couple o' rubber bands around it."
Jack paused and blinked for a moment. "Okay, lemme rephrase that. What's it SUPPOSED to be?"
"A banjo!"
Race leaned over and asked in a low voice so as not to further offend Bumlets, "What the hell is a banjo?"
I wasn't really sure. "Well, from the way he's strummin' it, I'd say it's something like a guitar." Bumlets was indeed strumming his heart out on the poor rubber bands strands. If he was trying to make a tune, he was very off key, but it was hard to tell whether or not he was aiming for a specific melody.
Eventually, however, he broke into song, "Why are there so many Songs about rainbows? And what's on the other side? Rainbows are visions But only illusions And rainbows have nothing to hide. So we've been told, and some choose to believe it. I know they're wrong, wait and see. Someday we'll find it The Rainbow Connection The lovers, the dreamers, and me!!!! Laaaa, da, da, deeee, da da daaa-"
Bumlets quickly was cut off when one of the rubber bands snapped on his hand. He looked at his now-broken beloved instrument as if he was about to cry and remorsefully hopped off the bed. He whispered, "I-it broke." Nobody moved.
"Hey, uh, Bumlets, you okay?" Boots hollered out from the back. Bumlets turned his gaze toward Boots.
"Am I okay? AM I OKAY?! MY BANJO JUST BROKE!!! I CAN NEVER SING MY HAPPY BANJO SONG AGAIN!!!!! EVER!! LIFE AS IT WAS IS OVER!!! MY LIFE IS NOW COMPLETELY . . . COMPLETELY . . ." Bumlets gasped, "BANJO-LESS!!!!! WHAT'LL I DO, OH, WHAT'LL I DO???" Dutchy tentatively stood up to put a comforting arm over his shoulder, but he ran away offstage, blubbering, "Gotta find some Elmer's glue."
Kid Blink walked onstage, pulling the curtain shut as he came. "Aaaand that concludes ouah dramatic poahtion of da show! Next up we got Mush, Skittery, Snoddy, an' Snipeshooter!"
Everyone cheered and somebody whistled piercingly, but, from the way no one even flinched, I assumed that it happened quite often. The lights dimmed. All the boys leaned forward eagerly, and I could feel the excitement in the air. All of a sudden, the lights blazed on and the curtain was yanked open. There stood Mush in front, with the other three in a row behind him.
Skittery, Snoddy, and Snipeshooter sang, "Be a man!"
Mush threw out his arms, "We must be swift as the coursing river!"
"Be a man."
"With all the force of a great typhooooon!"
"Be a man."
"With all the strength of a raging fire Mysterious as the dark side of the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooon!"
All four boys jumped into the air for the final note, "HA!"
The lights went out. Someone screamed.
"Who the hell was that?" I asked.
Jack answered for me, "Dammit, Itey, you scream like such a goil!"
I flinched.
"I'SE AFRAID OF THE DARK!!! TURN ON THE LIGHT NOOOOOW!!!!!"
"Ah, I can't find the switch!!"
"Ain't hard ta find, Dutchy, it's next to tha dooah!"
"CAN'T FIND THA DOOAH!!"
Itey shrieked again, "AUGH, SOMEBODY LOCKED US IN HERE AND VANISHED THE DOOR!!! I NEED MR. TEDDY; SOMEBODY FIND ME MR. TEDDY!!!!" "Itey, you can't vanish a door. Something can vanish, but you can't vanish something."
"Aw, shuddup, an' go home, Dave!"
"HOW CAN I GO HOME IF SOMEBODY VANISHED THE DOOR????"
"WITH THE LIGHT OUT, IT'S LESS DANGEROUS!"
"SOMEBODY STOLE MR. TEDDY!!!! AUGH!!! IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!"
"Shut yer mouth, will ya, Itey? I'll find yer dumb, ol' bear."
There was a rustle as Race got up and started poking around. Itey continued to whimper.
"OW! Man, Race, that was me TOE!"
"Sorry!"
"HERE WE ARE NOW; ENTERTAIN US!"
"Dutchy, just toin on da light!"
"I tolja, I lost da switch!"
"I FEEL STUPID!"
Someone answered back, "AND CONTAGIOUS!"
"You didn't lose the switch, Dutchy, it lost itself on you! That's what the French say!"
"DAVEY, SHUDDUP, WE AIN'T FRENCH!!"
"Actually, me mudda was half French."
"Well, I ain't French!"
"HERE WE ARE NOW; ENTERTAIN US!"
"WHERE THE HELL IS THE DAMN SWITCH???"
"YA CAN'T FIND DA SWITCH, CUZ DERE AIN'T NO SWITCH, DUTCHY, IT'S A PULL STRING!!"
"Since when?"
"A MULATTO!"
"Since foreva!"
I assumed that Dutchy began to wave his hands around in search of the pull string at that point, because moments later, I heard, "AUGH, WHAT THE HELL? DAT'S ME ONLY GOOD EYE, DUTCHY, YA CAN'T WRECK IT FOR ME!!!"
"Oops. Sorry, Blink. You okay?"
"AN ALBINO!"
"IT HOITS!"
"A MOSQUITO!"
"SOMEBODY TOIN ON DA LIGHT!!! I'SE AFRAID OF THE DARK!!!!"
"MY LIBIDO! YEAH!!!!"
I took a deep breath and bellowed, "KLOPPAAAAAAAH!!!"
It took a moment for everyone to catch on, but soon everyone was screaming "Kloppah, save us!" at the top of their lungs. I tell ya, he must be one sound sleeper, 'cause it was about ten minutes before he came up.
He opened the door and all the newsies enveloped him in a hug before he could take a step. Everyone began to describe what had happened in their own version, but then, yet again, Itey's piercing shriek cut the chaos easily, "GET OFF! MOVE!!! YOU'RE ALL TRAMPLING MR. TEDDY!!!!"
He dove head-first into the crowd, towards the floor, and people began hopping on one foot awkwardly in an attempt not the step on Itey's fingers. Eventually, Itey pulled away from the crowd, hugging a very ragged, limp what-used-to-be-a-bear.
Miraculously, Kloppah somehow managed to calm everybody down after that, and told us to all go to sleep. I got a few claps on the back for thinking to call Kloppah, as I walked into the bathroom stall to get into my pajamas. As I walked out, Race was at the sink, and called to me,
"Hey, Red, wouldja get me toothbrush?"
"Sure, where is it?"
"Unda me bed."
"UNDER the bed? Isn't that a kinda . . . dirty place to keep a toothbrush."
"He likes it under there."
"Oh, okay." I jumped over Itey, who was curled up on the floor with his bear, and dodged the glue splatters that surrounded Bumlets as he attempted to fix his instrument. When I finally got to Race's bunk, I knelt down, looked under, and screamed.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Aaaah, CLIFFHANGER! I got a little carried away with this chapter, but it was a lot of fun to write . . . I couldn't resist sticking in the Nirvana lyrics. Oh, man, I love that song. And Mulan. And the Muppets. They all rock.
DISCLAIMER: I own Red. I don't own any lyrics, or any newsies, or Kloppah, or the lodging house, or New York, or . . . well, you get my drift.
I don't know how late it was when Race and I finished with all his papes. The sun was almost gone, but we could still see fine. Businesses were beginning to turn out their lights one boy one as owners locked up for the night. A man came out to light the streetlamps.
When I was small, I thought the lights magically lit themselves, knowing what the right time was to come on, whether it was summer or winter. I had never once seen anyone light or douse them, and now, watching for the first time as an old man reached up to bring each one to life, it unnerved me. I turned to Race.
"So, how'd I do on my first day?"
Race smiled and shoved his hand in his pocket. I heard the jingle of a sizable amount of coins clinking together. He brought out a handful of the coins and held the out to me. "Not bad at all for a stahta. A new face around here'll be good foah business. Two hands." I cupped mine together as he handed them over, careful not to drop anything.
"You got a place?" I shook my head, my eyes downcast. " Great. You get ta stay at da newsie lodgin' house. Ya gotta pay rent, but it ain't much an' Kloppah'll give ya some time ta get on yer feet befoah he asks foah much."
"Who's Kloppah?"
"Da guy who owns da place." Race's face lit up as he remembered something and smiled mischievously. "Yer gonna have one helluva time tanight, boy!"
I tried to look curiously innocent. "Why?"
"KARAOKE NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Snitch jumped off his bunk and landed next to me. At least, I think it was Snitch. Race had introduced me to everyone and they'd been real nice about everything so far, but I was having a bit of trouble keeping track of all the names. My usually-excellent memory was not kicking in.
My eyes widened. "KARAOKE?!" I had been warned about the madness of the male gender many, many times, but never in my entire life did I expect this . . .
"Yep!"
I think it was Kid Blink who told everybody to "shuddup and siddown" at that point. A makeshift curtain had been created by tying a rope between two bedposts and draping a bunch of wrinkled sheets over it. He grinned eagerly and cleared his throat, "Allow me ta intraduce da foist act. Bumlets is gonna sing some song an' is annoyin'ly refusin' ta tell me what it is EVEN THOUGH DA WHOLE POINT O' DA ANNOUNCA IS TA ANNOUNCE DA NEXT SONG!!!!"
There was a muffled, "Aw, be quiet" from behind the curtain. Kid Blink rolled eyes and yanked back the sheets to reveal Bumlets sitting on a top bunk, his legs dangling off the edge. In his hands he held a . . . well, it was a . . .
"Bumlets, what the hell is that crap yer holdin'?" Jack finally decided to call out.
Bumlets was very hurt. "It's a Kleenex box with a Quilted Quicker Picker Upper From Bounty tube on the top and a couple o' rubber bands around it."
Jack paused and blinked for a moment. "Okay, lemme rephrase that. What's it SUPPOSED to be?"
"A banjo!"
Race leaned over and asked in a low voice so as not to further offend Bumlets, "What the hell is a banjo?"
I wasn't really sure. "Well, from the way he's strummin' it, I'd say it's something like a guitar." Bumlets was indeed strumming his heart out on the poor rubber bands strands. If he was trying to make a tune, he was very off key, but it was hard to tell whether or not he was aiming for a specific melody.
Eventually, however, he broke into song, "Why are there so many Songs about rainbows? And what's on the other side? Rainbows are visions But only illusions And rainbows have nothing to hide. So we've been told, and some choose to believe it. I know they're wrong, wait and see. Someday we'll find it The Rainbow Connection The lovers, the dreamers, and me!!!! Laaaa, da, da, deeee, da da daaa-"
Bumlets quickly was cut off when one of the rubber bands snapped on his hand. He looked at his now-broken beloved instrument as if he was about to cry and remorsefully hopped off the bed. He whispered, "I-it broke." Nobody moved.
"Hey, uh, Bumlets, you okay?" Boots hollered out from the back. Bumlets turned his gaze toward Boots.
"Am I okay? AM I OKAY?! MY BANJO JUST BROKE!!! I CAN NEVER SING MY HAPPY BANJO SONG AGAIN!!!!! EVER!! LIFE AS IT WAS IS OVER!!! MY LIFE IS NOW COMPLETELY . . . COMPLETELY . . ." Bumlets gasped, "BANJO-LESS!!!!! WHAT'LL I DO, OH, WHAT'LL I DO???" Dutchy tentatively stood up to put a comforting arm over his shoulder, but he ran away offstage, blubbering, "Gotta find some Elmer's glue."
Kid Blink walked onstage, pulling the curtain shut as he came. "Aaaand that concludes ouah dramatic poahtion of da show! Next up we got Mush, Skittery, Snoddy, an' Snipeshooter!"
Everyone cheered and somebody whistled piercingly, but, from the way no one even flinched, I assumed that it happened quite often. The lights dimmed. All the boys leaned forward eagerly, and I could feel the excitement in the air. All of a sudden, the lights blazed on and the curtain was yanked open. There stood Mush in front, with the other three in a row behind him.
Skittery, Snoddy, and Snipeshooter sang, "Be a man!"
Mush threw out his arms, "We must be swift as the coursing river!"
"Be a man."
"With all the force of a great typhooooon!"
"Be a man."
"With all the strength of a raging fire Mysterious as the dark side of the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooon!"
All four boys jumped into the air for the final note, "HA!"
The lights went out. Someone screamed.
"Who the hell was that?" I asked.
Jack answered for me, "Dammit, Itey, you scream like such a goil!"
I flinched.
"I'SE AFRAID OF THE DARK!!! TURN ON THE LIGHT NOOOOOW!!!!!"
"Ah, I can't find the switch!!"
"Ain't hard ta find, Dutchy, it's next to tha dooah!"
"CAN'T FIND THA DOOAH!!"
Itey shrieked again, "AUGH, SOMEBODY LOCKED US IN HERE AND VANISHED THE DOOR!!! I NEED MR. TEDDY; SOMEBODY FIND ME MR. TEDDY!!!!" "Itey, you can't vanish a door. Something can vanish, but you can't vanish something."
"Aw, shuddup, an' go home, Dave!"
"HOW CAN I GO HOME IF SOMEBODY VANISHED THE DOOR????"
"WITH THE LIGHT OUT, IT'S LESS DANGEROUS!"
"SOMEBODY STOLE MR. TEDDY!!!! AUGH!!! IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!"
"Shut yer mouth, will ya, Itey? I'll find yer dumb, ol' bear."
There was a rustle as Race got up and started poking around. Itey continued to whimper.
"OW! Man, Race, that was me TOE!"
"Sorry!"
"HERE WE ARE NOW; ENTERTAIN US!"
"Dutchy, just toin on da light!"
"I tolja, I lost da switch!"
"I FEEL STUPID!"
Someone answered back, "AND CONTAGIOUS!"
"You didn't lose the switch, Dutchy, it lost itself on you! That's what the French say!"
"DAVEY, SHUDDUP, WE AIN'T FRENCH!!"
"Actually, me mudda was half French."
"Well, I ain't French!"
"HERE WE ARE NOW; ENTERTAIN US!"
"WHERE THE HELL IS THE DAMN SWITCH???"
"YA CAN'T FIND DA SWITCH, CUZ DERE AIN'T NO SWITCH, DUTCHY, IT'S A PULL STRING!!"
"Since when?"
"A MULATTO!"
"Since foreva!"
I assumed that Dutchy began to wave his hands around in search of the pull string at that point, because moments later, I heard, "AUGH, WHAT THE HELL? DAT'S ME ONLY GOOD EYE, DUTCHY, YA CAN'T WRECK IT FOR ME!!!"
"Oops. Sorry, Blink. You okay?"
"AN ALBINO!"
"IT HOITS!"
"A MOSQUITO!"
"SOMEBODY TOIN ON DA LIGHT!!! I'SE AFRAID OF THE DARK!!!!"
"MY LIBIDO! YEAH!!!!"
I took a deep breath and bellowed, "KLOPPAAAAAAAH!!!"
It took a moment for everyone to catch on, but soon everyone was screaming "Kloppah, save us!" at the top of their lungs. I tell ya, he must be one sound sleeper, 'cause it was about ten minutes before he came up.
He opened the door and all the newsies enveloped him in a hug before he could take a step. Everyone began to describe what had happened in their own version, but then, yet again, Itey's piercing shriek cut the chaos easily, "GET OFF! MOVE!!! YOU'RE ALL TRAMPLING MR. TEDDY!!!!"
He dove head-first into the crowd, towards the floor, and people began hopping on one foot awkwardly in an attempt not the step on Itey's fingers. Eventually, Itey pulled away from the crowd, hugging a very ragged, limp what-used-to-be-a-bear.
Miraculously, Kloppah somehow managed to calm everybody down after that, and told us to all go to sleep. I got a few claps on the back for thinking to call Kloppah, as I walked into the bathroom stall to get into my pajamas. As I walked out, Race was at the sink, and called to me,
"Hey, Red, wouldja get me toothbrush?"
"Sure, where is it?"
"Unda me bed."
"UNDER the bed? Isn't that a kinda . . . dirty place to keep a toothbrush."
"He likes it under there."
"Oh, okay." I jumped over Itey, who was curled up on the floor with his bear, and dodged the glue splatters that surrounded Bumlets as he attempted to fix his instrument. When I finally got to Race's bunk, I knelt down, looked under, and screamed.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Aaaah, CLIFFHANGER! I got a little carried away with this chapter, but it was a lot of fun to write . . . I couldn't resist sticking in the Nirvana lyrics. Oh, man, I love that song. And Mulan. And the Muppets. They all rock.