This is Bridget Jones in the diary of 2004 and this is how it all is now!
Now we all remember before there was that Big thing that I had For Daniel
my ex boss well I have a new man goes by the name Mark Darcy very sexy man
with a great body and lets not say what else ah...Ha ha! Now I have a lot of
Party's with my friends the poof, the office girl that calls me up crying
over fuck wit boyfriend and of course my other friend who has the life to
say fuck...a lot! I have my new job still 'Sit Up Britain' and my boss
Richard is happy with my work, which is ok!
Monday 1st March:
I get up see my legs are really hairy like monkey legs, rush to the bathroom shaving my legs in there 2 hours Making Mark late for work and oh shit my mum's coming over for dinner great have to cook dinner have no idea what to cook!! Oh I sometimes wish the bloody floor would swallow me up!! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? Well lets just hope I don't make a mess of dinner!!
Tuesday 2nd March:
Dinner went well! Just had call from my boss Richard saying he wants me to work later shift today what a bloody cheek anyways Oh I have a party to go to it's my poof friends party mainly for lesbo's and poofs!!! Oh great what fun I'll have Fuck I haven't got him a present because its not just a party it's his BIRTHDAY SHIT!! I'll have to go buy him a card he will have to make do with that.
Wednesday 3rd March:
Oh bloody hell major hangover had lesbo's trying it with me all night!!! But part from that it was fun! Well I have to go to work today as well that means I probably will say everything wrong and get fired. Which I don't really want I think I'll ring Richard and take the day off sick sure he'll understand and and Goodnight!!
Thursday 4th March:
Bloody Mark had him going on in my bloody ear telling me I shouldn't have got drunk because I would have been able to go to work!!! He can shut up!! And I didn't call Richard oh crap I'm going to get fired!!! That's almost as worst as my bottom the size of Britain falling on top the camera!! And wow is Mark a good shager ahhh it was amazing!!! Not quite better then Daniel he knew how to play with Boobs!!! But I think that's all for today
Friday 5th March:
Mark comes home looking with a face as long as a horse! And me I've been fired just as I thought don't know what's wrong with Mark better ask him later!! The same day yesterday about 1:00 when me and Mark were in bed (wink) there was a knock at the door! I opened the door there standing at my door was Daniel oh shit was this bad!! Mark heard his voice and came out of the bedroom with a towel on and went to go for Daniel and his towel fell off stark Naked he was it looked good to me!! Mark ran back in and got some clothes on and went and beat the pulp out of Daniel!!!
Saturday 6th March:
Well me and Mark over my mum's and had dinner with the Family, they all just kept going on about me and Mark how boring!! And about Daniel believe me I did not enjoy that dinner day at mum's almost worst as the time I went to the dinner with all those smug married couples, that was when Mark was with that Bitch Natasha Glenfield she used to treat Mark like a dog clicking her fingers at him and he went running that was the day he told me he liked me JUST AS I AM!!! I thought that was so sweet!! Well got to go about to have a early night in bed with Mark!!
Sunday 7th March:
End of the weekend oh great my fresh new week of looking through the papers for a job!!! Oh what joy well Mark can help me since he is at home today!!! He is still in bed, lazy Bones oh well I can defiantly say I have had a unsual week and I think I should just go and get totally pissed and down a whole bottle of Vodka yep that's the answer to all this!! Well that's it see you Monday Diary if I'm not too pissed to tell you my day and remember you ever want to get played like a fool just do what I did to get Daniel!! Ha ha ha well maybe not!!!
Monday 1st March:
I get up see my legs are really hairy like monkey legs, rush to the bathroom shaving my legs in there 2 hours Making Mark late for work and oh shit my mum's coming over for dinner great have to cook dinner have no idea what to cook!! Oh I sometimes wish the bloody floor would swallow me up!! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? Well lets just hope I don't make a mess of dinner!!
Tuesday 2nd March:
Dinner went well! Just had call from my boss Richard saying he wants me to work later shift today what a bloody cheek anyways Oh I have a party to go to it's my poof friends party mainly for lesbo's and poofs!!! Oh great what fun I'll have Fuck I haven't got him a present because its not just a party it's his BIRTHDAY SHIT!! I'll have to go buy him a card he will have to make do with that.
Wednesday 3rd March:
Oh bloody hell major hangover had lesbo's trying it with me all night!!! But part from that it was fun! Well I have to go to work today as well that means I probably will say everything wrong and get fired. Which I don't really want I think I'll ring Richard and take the day off sick sure he'll understand and and Goodnight!!
Thursday 4th March:
Bloody Mark had him going on in my bloody ear telling me I shouldn't have got drunk because I would have been able to go to work!!! He can shut up!! And I didn't call Richard oh crap I'm going to get fired!!! That's almost as worst as my bottom the size of Britain falling on top the camera!! And wow is Mark a good shager ahhh it was amazing!!! Not quite better then Daniel he knew how to play with Boobs!!! But I think that's all for today
Friday 5th March:
Mark comes home looking with a face as long as a horse! And me I've been fired just as I thought don't know what's wrong with Mark better ask him later!! The same day yesterday about 1:00 when me and Mark were in bed (wink) there was a knock at the door! I opened the door there standing at my door was Daniel oh shit was this bad!! Mark heard his voice and came out of the bedroom with a towel on and went to go for Daniel and his towel fell off stark Naked he was it looked good to me!! Mark ran back in and got some clothes on and went and beat the pulp out of Daniel!!!
Saturday 6th March:
Well me and Mark over my mum's and had dinner with the Family, they all just kept going on about me and Mark how boring!! And about Daniel believe me I did not enjoy that dinner day at mum's almost worst as the time I went to the dinner with all those smug married couples, that was when Mark was with that Bitch Natasha Glenfield she used to treat Mark like a dog clicking her fingers at him and he went running that was the day he told me he liked me JUST AS I AM!!! I thought that was so sweet!! Well got to go about to have a early night in bed with Mark!!
Sunday 7th March:
End of the weekend oh great my fresh new week of looking through the papers for a job!!! Oh what joy well Mark can help me since he is at home today!!! He is still in bed, lazy Bones oh well I can defiantly say I have had a unsual week and I think I should just go and get totally pissed and down a whole bottle of Vodka yep that's the answer to all this!! Well that's it see you Monday Diary if I'm not too pissed to tell you my day and remember you ever want to get played like a fool just do what I did to get Daniel!! Ha ha ha well maybe not!!!